#elrand

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Dorian hated everything at the moment. He hated how he’d responded, but more he hated how Bull seemed to have shrugged it all off and moved on with as much ease as he had lifting a full grown man and throwing him out of a bar. Dorian couldn’t go back to the bar anymore. He’d see Bull there smiling and easy going as always. While Dorian was being torn apart by his own stupid mistakes. He shouldn’t have reacted the way he did... He could see that now. Yet in the heat of the moment he’d thrown away the only good thing he had going in this part of the world.

He sat before his therapist who his friend Felix had insisted he see in the first place, because of his father. Now he was going back because his father had shown up and in a fit of fear and anger he’d made sure to distance himself from everyone that cared. Well... Mostly, at least the ones that had been there, though the others were a little weary though obviously worried about him. He sat feeling like he should just leave.  It was vicious and eating him to see her hanging on Bull. He wants to make Bull hurt like he is but he won’t be that much of a bastard. He’d already drunk himself into several stupors in his flat. He felt worse than he’d been in a long while.

“Dorian, haven’t seen you in a while... You seem a bit rattled, what can I help with?” The man asks, he’s an elf and he has a deep compassionate soul and he’d actually gotten Dorian out of a fight once and Dorian was still shocked with the fact the small male only coming up just below Dorian’s shoulder, and he had a rather calm temperament, could move like he had that night. He’d been a viper and had struck like a hammer.

Dorian had gotten pinned down and was getting stomped on as they threw several slurs at him, none he hasn’t heard before. The elf had lunged out from a shadow grabbed a man by his arm twisted it back and kicked out his legs before spinning out from between the two last men and he’d backed to a wall watching with hawk like eyes before springing forward and jumping with a swing of his leg knocked one man in the head landed and the last had booked it. Back then Dorian hadn’t been able to say anything shock and pain had kept him silent. The elf had turned to him and helped him get to his bike.

“You can come back to my apartment where I’ll be able to patch you up or I can take you to your home. I warn you my roommate’s an utter flirt.” He had warned but Dorian had been shaken to the core. He’d heard them talk about his apartment before he’d tried to confront them. He’d decided to go with Lavellan, as he learned that was his name. At least, last name...

“I’d... Prefer it. They know where I live.” Dorian says and the elf had gotten a look on his face that screamed something unpleasant was going to happen to the men. He pulled out a phone called in the fight and where to find them and proceeded to leave the two cuffed together and to a near by dumpster. They left and went to a flat. The elf had had to help Dorian walk, after all he’d been tipsy when he’d walked out of the rather sleazy bar then he’d gotten the shit beat out of him. They’d come in to the apartment and Lavellan had gently sat the mage on a bar chair at a small counter in the kitchen.

“Bull, I have a pretty boy at the bar, you mind garbing the first aid kit? He was in a scuffle.” The elf says and the qunari the pops his head out almost startles Dorian into instant sobriety.

“Yeah, he looks a bit scuffed up.” He says and disappears a moment and Lavellan hands him a glass full of water and Dorian hesitates not wanting to get his blood everywhere.

“Don’t worry about it, Bull get’s blood on shit all the time. Being a bouncer doesn’t always end up with him coming home happy as a clam.” Lavellan says and takes the kit from the giant man with a smile and thanks. Dorian feels as nervous as he should. Tevinter doesn’t have very friendly relations with Qunari after all even after they major reforms they’d not made any real amends with the other race and would continue going into constant fights with them as the world aged and everyone learned to be somewhat civil with one another. Then again even with reform Tevinter hadn’t changed as much as the rest of Thedas would have liked. Hell Dorian didn’t much care for what they’d done himself. Still too many power mongering bastards all jockeying in the government and not enough that cared for the lower classes.

“Oh, a vint to boot, no wonder he got in a scuffle... You alright, they must’ve gotten you bad.” Bull says and Dorian coughs mildly shocked the other wasn’t going for his head.

“Ah, fine, they said a few things I’ve heard plenty of back home, and a couple things that I’ve heard more creative versions of, and besides, I might be a pretty boy but I’m not a stranger to getting ganged up on. The downside to being in the south is the fact I can’t just roast them.” Dorian chirps and Lavellan paused looking at him.

“We mages are just getting allowed to roam around without scrutiny twenty four seven down here in the south, please don’t get those bigots fired up again.” He says softly and Dorian winced shaking his head.

“No, I was making a joke in poor taste. Besides my magic field is heavily frowned on in these parts it’s best I not use it.” He says and Lavellan goes about taking a wet cloth and cleaning Dorian's face up a bit.

“What field?” He asks focusing on his patient as Dorian looks to the side blushing softly. He’s not used to this level of care and concern. Nor the open interest.

“Necromancy.” He says dryly expecting revulsion or sudden contempt as that’s all the south has been nor matter what he does to try to fit in. Instead the elf perk up.

“That field is rare in this part of the world, I’d love to hear on the theory... But another time, preferably when I’m not patching you up from looking like you’re the one risen from the dead.” The elf jokes and Bull chuckles and leans on the counter watching worriedly.

“So, what exactly got them on you?” He asks and Dorian shrugs wincing and Lavellan clicks at him looking agitated as he pulls back.

“Strip, what the fuck did they do to you?” The elf asks and Dorian can’t help being lippy.

“Typically you buy someone dinner or a few drinks before asking they strip.” And both laugh as Lavellan glares at the two taller males.

“Fuck you both. You winced obviously they fucked you up more than just scuffing up your face. Now, strip or I’m going to destroy your damn shirt.” The elf says cocking a hip and glowering at Dorian as he crosses him arms over his chest. Dorian nods and set the glass down and winced as he undoes a few ties and a couple buttons and lets his shirt drift off his shoulders so he balls it up in his lap. Lavellan winced and shakes his head.

“I need to do a quick call... I gotta let Cullen know I’m healing someone...” He turns and walks out and Bull even winced stopping Dorian from moving.

“Don’t move that looks bad, he’s just going to call a friend who is the one that checks up on him whenever his phylactery registers he’s using magic.” Bull says and Dorian nods. He wonders if he could have the man manage his as he’s certain the one he met just wants even a thin excuse to toss him out on his ass. He shudders at the though as so long as he’s here surely his father can’t get him. Bull looks at him curious but doesn’t press. Lavellan comes out with the phone held in his shoulder and in a tank top exposing the vine like tattoos that run from his face down to his hands and even down his chest and vanishing under his pants as the tank top is just thin enough to reveal the tattoos on the pale skin.

“Cullen if I do a vid call I can show you how beat up this man is. I don’t like it.” Lavellan says and there is a pause before he hangs up and recalls the man.

“Alright, I do trust you, Elrand, just show me and I can write this off as a needed use of magic. I need at least some photo evidence.” A voice says and the elf nods and walks up to Dorian and flips the phone around Dorian gives a sheepish wave as he’d seen the man in the back ground as he’d registered with the version of the Circle the South had. The man get’s an angry look on his face and shakes his head.

“I recognize him, Elrand, who did that?” The man asks and Elrand shrugs.

“I called Cassandra on their asses a better question would be if they’ll live once she’d done.” He says sweetly. Cullen grumbles and shakes his head.

“Help him out I’m already filling out the report. Is there anything else?” He asks and DOrian perks up.

“Could you take over for the ass managing my phylactery? He’s actually threatened if I so much as summon glitter he’ll have me thrown out of the country. Do you know how hard it is not to summon glitter when you’re as fabulous as I am?” Dorian jokes and all three with him laugh though Cullen looks none too impressed.

“I can look into it that particular officer is known to be... Well, a hard ass. I can only handle a max of ten cases but your lucky, a mage I had passed away last year and I’ve yet to pick up a new case. I can pull rank if, Lavellan can vouch I should.” The man says and Dorian looks between the screen and the elf.

“You’re friends I take it?” He asks and Lavellan shrugs.

“I’m a friendly enough person. Besides Cullen managed my case after someone tried mishandling it a few years back. I’m raised Dalish so initially I wasn’t registered as the treaties state we manage our own. I eventually moved off the Reservation and came to the city and agreed to get a phylactery as I studied to become a therapist. I almost got killed and had used my magic to help heal myself enough I wasn’t going to die, bastard tried to have me removed back to Reservation but both my clan and several officers threw a fit. Cullen was one of them. He’s seen some messed up situations as he was an officer during the Reform Riots. More than once he saw abused mages and on the flip side abominations torturing mages and officers alike. I’m not his official therapist but eh, close enough.” Elrand says smiling softly as Cullen looks to the side.

“Get to know him. If you say he’s worth it I’ll take his case.” Cullen says and hangs up. Elrand gasps and places a hand on his chest looking at Bull with mock surprise.

“He’s considering it, Bull! Dorian you must have charmed him!” He jokes placing his phone on the counter and getting to work healing the damages done hands glowing a faint green as he brushes over the scrapes and bruises.

“It’s a trait of mine, I’m just too charming to resist.” He mocks himself and Bull chuckles.

“Pretty boy, you’d get in over your head if you tried for Cullen, he’s to uptight to swing your way. A bit too damaged for most people too.” Bull sighs looking oddly thoughtful. Dorian winced.

“He went through the Riots... Couldn’t have been pretty I am hopeful the stories we heard were exaggerated but I have a feeling they were a bit closer to the truth than I would like.” He says and Elrand shakes his head.

“Cullen said they were horrific... He saw good officers torn to pieces and even good mages cut down. He still has nightmares.

“Can’t blame him... It sounds horrifying.” Dorian says and Lavellan nods. The elf heals the other mage and asks him if he still feels any serious pain and as Bull makes a snarky reply about toesies and grapes Dorian huffs.

“My toesies are perfectly fine, thank you.” He grumbles and Bull chuckles with Lavellan. The elf disappears into his room for a moment and comes out with a sweater and sweatpants. 

“Here put these on, I’ll throw your outfit in the wash so it’s clean by tomorrow. You said they knew where you lived so Bull or I am definitely giving you a lift home in the morning to be sure you get there and nothing will happen. You can change in my room and as far as it goes Bull might say you can sleep with him or there is the couch. It’s comfy, I’ve fallen asleep on it several times.” Elrand says and Dorian slips away and comes out with his battered outfit and Elrand nabs it and goes to a back room cackling as he tosses it into the washer and starts a cycle. That night Dorian sleeps better than he had for the entire time he’d been in the south. Having people near him helped quite a bit with the paranoia of being kidnapped back home. 

Over the next couple months he’d seen Lavellan as a therapist and often went to the bar Bull works at, Dorian’s more stable on his feet and has a job in the library. Then he’d gotten close to Bull and the giant ox had slowly gotten past all his walls and oddly made him happy. Incredibly happy. He was smiling and teasing and had become less guarded. He made quite a few friends and after he’d stopped seeing Lavellan as a therapist the elf had even joined in the fun explaining to Dorian he tries not to mix his patients with casual time. He understood but it was fun to get to know the elf. Elrand got close with him, his closest friend save Felix. Who was steadily fading away from illness he hasn’t been able to recover from. That no one had any idea how to treat fully nor cure. 

Dorian even slowly began to date Bull seriously rather than the relaxed almost friends with benefits set up they had going. It’s been a while he’s in a new place that’s better and less likely to result in anyone being able to easily break in. Even Cullen had taken over his case. Dorian was actually happy and was glad he’d left Tevinter. After so long hating his choice and wondering if he should have just bowed let his father do as he wished and just lived his life a simpering mess rather than face daily hate, he was sure his choice had been the right one. 

Then of course everything had to go horridly wrong. He’d just gotten news Felix had passed away and was planning on meeting everyone at the bar for some drinks and he’d wait for Bull to get off go home with him and chill with him and Elrand and watch some cheesy sitcom. Instead his father had stopped him as he went to the bar. Several men pop out and grab his arms. Dorian had gone to tell his father to fuck off but when he’s grabbed he lets a short burst of magic light up his fingertips in a triple burst. This was a silent help sos to Cullen. He wasn’t scared really, not at first. Not until his father had cut his hand and started a ritual. Dorian hadn’t recognized the runes but he panicked at that moment. 

“I’m not going to be your fucking puppet!” Dorian shouts and fire flares from his hands catching the two on fire he uses a focus blast and quickly bolts away he’s hit with a spell not that it truly stops him but he dimly recognizes it’s not a spell meant to harm. He’d gone straight to Bull, but the spell was taking affect he dimly realizes is was a terror spell. He isn’t clear on what happened only that he lashed out mostly at Bull who had been concerned and tried calming him down, which had set off Dorian in the worst way, before leaving and getting back to his apartment. He’d been called by Cullen but had still had the damn spell screwing with his mind he didn’t answer. It was late when both Elrand and Cullen came to his door. Dorian had thrown up and was shaking and though the spell had worn off he was still scared and shaking in his bathroom. Cullen had a key largely due to the possibility he’d need to get in to Dorian. 

“Dorian, what’s going on?” Elrand calls worriedly he’d shown up to see the group clearing out all shaking their heads talking about Dorian snapping like a dry twig. He was seriously worried even more so when Cullen had texted him saying he was on his way to Dorian’s apartment as he wasn’t where he used an sos. He’d come in and found Dorian and asked what happened. Dorian just shook his head. He didn’t want to talk about it. Elrand let it slide helped Dorian to get to his bed and checked him over letting Cullen know that Dorian had been cursed with a terror spell. Dorian remained shut in for his week long leave he’d been given due to losing his friend. 

He went back to work and tried to ignore the fact he’d screwed up his life in the south by playing right into his father’s tricks. He reacted hostilely when under terror spells, he’d lash out he should have gone home, should have done anything but go to Bull who would have just gotten the back lash. How could he even begin to explain to anyone he’d lashed out at that night? Cullen and Elrand were waiting to tell anyone anything until Dorian said they could. Dorian had gone out to try at the least to tell Bull he was sorry. He had left as soon as he’d walked in. He’d seen Bull with a redhead on his lap and left. He wanted to kill her. He’d gotten angry and knew he couldn’t handle being around anyone. 

He’d see that same simpering bitch hanging on Bull’s arm in public and he’d grow angry. He’d kept his mouth shut giving a fake smile and saying he was glad they were happy when he couldn’t slip away without appearing rude down the street and Bull would talk to him. He never meant it. He was in shock Bull had moved on so simply. Had Dorian shoved him away that harshly that he was just a concerning after thought now to the other man? 

Elrand waves his hand in front of Dorian bringing him back to the office of the elf and he coughs and swallows hard. 

“Ah, sorry, I um...” Dorian looked down and Elrand sighs.

“I don’t typically let my friends hire me, I make this single exception becuase I have a feeling you won’t open up about any of what’s eating you on the inside to someone you don’t know. So... let’s start with that nasty spell that sent you in a spiral.” Elrand says and Dorian shivers looking sick, Elrand being the dear he is pulls out a cold brew ginger tea and offers it to Dorian who accepts it with a soft thanks. Dorian takes a deep breath after taking a sip of tea. He just dumps all of it out. 

How his father had tried twisting him with blood magic, how he’d shown up and when Dorian escaped he’d hit him with the terror spell and he’d taken a nose dive. He’d tried to get to a safe place but the concern rubbed him wrong as when he was under a terror spell he’d get angry as he wasn’t quite immune to the effects but he could fight them but it makes him afraid like back in Tevinter when someone found out and was spewing hateful words and drawing attention that often resulted in him getting beaten to near death by a group of assholes. Elrand silently listens his eyes sowly darkening with rage. He stops Dorian as he explains the blow up at the bar.

“I heard about it... Now that I know what triggered it... Fuck... I want to kill your father and carpet bomb Tevinter.” Elrand says and Dorian shrugs.

“That’s the general consensus about my home.” Dorian says and Elrand hums.

″Gee, I wonder why?” He scoffs and Dorian chuckles though drops his head into his hand.

“I fucked up... Bull made me happier than I’ve ever been and I fucked it up.” Dorian is crying and Elrand can’t stand it.

“Dorian, Bull’s a play boy, all it’ll take is you talking this out with him and a small apology... Mostly for you though. You’re clearly guilty over this. You need to tell him what happened. Or... I mean I don’t want to suggest this but I can act as a medium. I can even have it at our flat so it’s a safe known space.” Elrand says softly unable to go and hug the human like he wants he has to maintain some professionalism. 

“Maybe... I just... I want to feel safe again... I want him to cry for me at least not just hop to some red headed floozy.” Dorian mumbles something Elrand can’t hear then he can hear him again “If he can’t at least he could lie to me.” Dorian whines into his hands. Elrand hums softly feeling angry on Dorian’s behalf. He’d not liked the man taking the panic induced break up as seriously as he had. Bull had been agitated but Elrand had been unable to say anything unable to break Dorian’s confidence. 

“This isn’t healthy for you, we need to have you two talk... He wasn’t as happy as he might seem. He was rather upset after but I was afraid I’d say something that relates to the event and didn’t want to betray your trust so... We’re going to head to the flat and sort this out, okay?” He asks hand holding Dorian's over the desk and Dorian looks up nodding make up trashed but he looks hopeful. Elrand shows Dorian to the restroom so he can clean up and call’s Bull to make sure the other was home.

“You’re home alone right?” He asks standing at the end of the hall so Dorian won’t overhear. 

“Yeah, was planning on seeing if that redhead from the bar was available.” Bull says and Elrand feels like he wants to kill someone. He really shouldn’t be possessive for Dorian it was pointless. Or he might just not like Bull going for the shallow girls... His own possessiveness maybe. 

“Don’t. You and Dorian need to talk about that night.” Elrand says.

“No. We really don’t.” Bull says flatly and ELrand feels his magic cackle around him as his temper peaks.

“Yes, you fucking do, you stubborn bastard. He wasn’t in his right mind, you know that! His father showed up and tried to fuck with him, if you know anything about Halward you will be fucking civil and listen to him. Or I’ll fucking saw off your horns you dammed ox!” Elrand spits and Bull goes silent.

“You’re worked up bad... Alright, boss. I’ll hear him out.” Bull says and Elrand calms down.

“Thank you, Bull... He... He needs you to listen. Please that’s all I’m asking. Just let him explain.” Elrand asks quietly as Dorian comes out and looks at him walking up.

“Alright.” Bull says and Elrand hangs up laces his arm with the altus and they walk out. Elrand joking and teasing Dorian to get his mind off things as he drives them on his bike. They walk up and Dorian starts to lag behind looking more and more like he might combust or break down into tears. Elrand tries to cheer him up the best he can saying he’d get the brandy out as soon as they got in. Dorian nods mutely and they enter Bull’ lounging in his leather lazboy and and Dorian keeps his eyes on the ground unable to work up much other than a sullen wave as he stands awkward more so than when they first met. Bull can see Elrand had gotten worked up from how off Dorian was so waits watching the elf dote on the mage seating him on the couch even though he had to bounce to do it making Bull chuckle. 

“Brandy.” Elrand says and goes to the open kitchen opening the cabinet he stores his booze in he pulls out the bottle and three glasses which he sets all on the coffee table before grabbing three steel cubes from the freezer and pouring them all brandy. He sits by Dorian, practically cuddled into his side.

“Alright, so, should I start this off or do you want to?” The elf asks and the human clears his throat taking a large gulp of the brandy making Bull focus more as Dorian only drank like this when he was troubled. He knew Dorian had a fucked past, he was a gay man from Tevinter after all. He didn’t know details though as Dorian kept all of it close to his chest. 

Dorian looks up catching Bull’s eye and it all starts pouring out, first a stumbling apology about lashing out then the explanation of why he came to the south, then what his father had pulled when he’d been trying to go to the party. Explaining what terror spells did to him and why and how he was again deeply sorry he had not meant to fuck up, he’d just wanted to get to safety but by then the spell was in full effect and he’d been a bastard. He looks down and covers his face shaking and Elrand is rubbing his back looking down not having touched his drink. He’s staring down at it with a clenched jaw, his eyes focused on the cube dancing in the brandy. Bull can tell Elrand is furious with Dorian’s father.

“This is all accurate?” Bull asks Elrand who looks up.

“He was hit with a terror spell, I wasn’t with him so I can’t say it was his father but I know what to look for when Dorian lies and I can tell you he did not.” Elrand says softly. Bull nods and sets the glass down.

“So you were out of it and never meant what you said?” Bull asks and Dorian reluctantly looks up.

“I don’t even know what I said, I can’t really remember what was going on that night. I heard some of it from a few of the others in text and I... I’m sorry. Cullen’s said he’s trying to find my father and get him put in prison or at least sent back but I just... I’m terrified and hate that I fucked up what made me happy becuase my father rattled me.” Dorian says voice now a rasp and his throat feels like someone wadded up sand paper and stuffed down his throat and his eyes are red and puffy from crying. Bull’s actually relieved. Dorian had been vicious but now that he knew... Dorian hadn’t meant to direct it at them, he’d been lashing out at the old memories the spell pulled up. 

“Dorian, you could have come and told me.” He says softly and Dorian snorts and shakes his head.

“I stew. I don’t deal with my problems I drink them away. When that doesn’t work I go talk to Elrand.” He groused. The elf laughs softly and hugs the human and sets his drink on the coffee table. He then looked at Bull and gestured him to come over and so Bull does. It’s a start and Elrand is happy that he’s managed to help them start back up and heal, especially for Dorian’s sake. He’d need the patient help Bull could provide. 

~