I'm Going To Apple Tarts #1: Ellen Marshall
Ellen has been to all our nights and we love her for 2 reasons. 1: She's reliably drunk and loud before anyone else. 2: She's brutally honest. I (Dave) can recall at least 2 nights where the moment saw me she completely took apart my outfit with no regard to how much thought or time I'd put into it (evidently not enough). Don't fear her though; she's lovely, and if last year is anything she'll be twisted on the local cider by mid-afternoon. If she is, for your sake make sure you are well turned out. Haven’t we seen you somewhere before? Seen me somewhere before? I should hope so David, seeing as I have attended every Tarts night since they started. (This may not actually be true, but why let detail get in the way of a good story.) You may also know me from the amazing Apple Tarts poster designed by Gill Scott, although I am less pleased that you chose the photo of me looking not dissimilar to a mad, fat alcoholic. You win some, you lose some. (Oh and yes I went to Apple Tarts last year and had the best night of my life thanksloveyoubye.) What was your favourite thing about Apple Tarts? Favourite thing about Apple Tarts? Hard to choose David, as the entire 24 hours was ace from start to finish. However, after much deliberation, it wasn't the 3am singsong round the bonfire, nor the bacon sandwich the-morning-after-the-night-before, nor the rockaoke, but dancing to garage in a field at 4pm, pint of local cider in hand, insane grin in place, covered in hay. Amazing. Do you intend to get up and sing during rockaoke? No, because I can't sing. I was in the choir when I was at school, and even my teacher told me to mime the high notes. Who was the best person you saw/snogged/strangled? The best person I saw was probably Tom Pullen, on the grounds that I have never seen anyone else manage to get more than three people to sing along to the Kooks before. A rare talent. How would you describe Apple Tarts to someone that didn’t know what it was? The giddiness when you go to University and realise that you can do whatever the hell you want + the excitement of arriving at the airport for your very first holiday away with your friends + the sheer joy of that first drink on a Friday night, knowing that whatever happens, you don't have to get up for work tomorrow = Apple Tarts. Also: to be seen to be believed. Given the choice and with a gun to your head, what variety of apple would you eat every day for the rest of your life? Right, so when I was younger my nanny (yes I had a nanny...sssshh) wouldn't let us have apple juice, only water or squash. Everyone wants what they can't have and although you'd think that I would have moved on by now, apple juice is still the forbidden fruit (SORRY). Therefore my answer to your cleverly-shoehorned-in-the-word-apple question is: liquid apple. Yum. Quickfire quiz (NB: These were asked with the intention of receiving one-word answers.) Beer or wine? Wine. I only drank beer for the first time this February, when Gemma Johnson force-fed me Corona. That's what friends are for etc etc. Boys or girls? I like boys, sure, but I'm going girls as there is no greater joy than getting together with your girlfriends and pretending you're in a girlband. (Disclaimer: there might be.) Sun or snow? Sun - I have self-diagnosed Raynaud's Disease and according to Wikipedia the cold can be FATAL. Give or receive? At the risk of sounding cheesy, giving. I was so excited about giving my ex his Christmas present that I gave it to him in November. A month later he gave me some personalised post-its. Oh. Meat or fish? Meat. Sausage rolls = happiness. Call or text? Text. Everyone who knows me will know that I avoid talking on the phone wherever possible, which is strange given I work in Communications. Will or Harry ? Harry, on the grounds that Will's married and having an affair with the future King is probably treason or something Face or tits? I'm going to take the moral highground and say: PERSONALITY. Black or white? I have absolutely no preference. I'll say black because...*scrapes barrel*... it's flattering? Apple or pear? Pear. I don't know why. STOP ASKING ME QUESTIONS. Oh. You have. Ellen has a blog, you might have already guessed that by her answers to what was supposedly a quickfire quiz. Anyway, its funny and she talks awfully candidly about herself. Check it here.
