#eenefandom

We acted elitist, childish and we were bullies. I regret every moment I acted that way. It’s kind of ridiculous and embarrassing how 2 people in the ed edd n eddy fandom were that high and mighty in the first place.

I will not make excuses for myself but I have come a long, long way since leaving her in 2022 and even before that. I can see how she acted influenced my actions: however, my actions were my own and I acknowledge that. Despite being in a moment of intense crisis the things I said and did were wrong.

We hurt people, tremendously. I know now why I did it, I wanted approval from her, I didn’t want to go against her and suffer the consequences, and I wanted to prove so desperately I was doing something right. I wanted to believe our relationship was good and healthy but it wasn’t. It simply wasn’t.

There were a few people in the fandom one by the name of “doubledyke” (pretty sure it is not the one who is actively posting now) that we poked fun at. The details are blurry but I remember that all she wanted was to enjoy the fandom and they were an edd/ed shipper I think? Or they loved Ed— either or we were dicks about it.

There was a really amazing artist by the name of Impano/Camriko that sweeteggy was (in my opinion) incredibly jealous of. From what I remember of the incident, Chris didn’t want to see other ships in her feed so she unfollowed Camriko. Then Cam got nervous, understandably, most likely because they had no idea what was happening. Imo it is also true that Chris had a lot of power and influence in the community and other people were intimidated by her.

There were some words exchanged and I cannot recall the conversation exactly, but I remember the outcome. Chris was furious at her and was basically “done,” as she put it.

Chris at one point noticed a drawing that Camriko did of the Eds and they were looking at a porn mag which is a common gag in the show. I believe that this was the fuel that Chris needed to push things over the edge.

She made a blog named “Randitto” and called Camriko a pedophile because of this. I remember that night and I was originally in a state of incredible anxiety and hid in the bedroom. At first I told her I didn’t think it was a good idea, that we would have to lie to the fandom that it wasn’t her that made the Randitto blog if she was trying to remain anonymous. I had made some good friends in the fandom and I didn’t want to lie to them. Still, she did it. Eventually I found myself going along with the lie and actively lying to others. I had no part in writing what was said on that blog but I will not discount the fact that I too lied. Despite the fact that I did it to protect her reputation, it was still a lie and it was wrong.

No one deserves that, especially not the artist Camriko. She seemed like a very nice and genuine person. I believe that Chris was jealous of her talent and her ability to easily make friends with others in the fandom. Chris was really bad at making and keeping friends. I attribute this to her inability to assume others have good intentions and this was most likely due to a lot of factors in her life that I have no right to share.

Anyway, I am extremely too late in talking about this. This was like over 7-8 years ago. We were together until July 2022 and I had mentioned wanting to admit we lied during the break up. She obviously did not like that idea. I was scared and things were ugly. I don’t want to make accusations online but I did not deserve what was done to me. That’s all I am going to say on that subject.

When we were going through the separation her name was still on my car loan and title that only I paid for and I didn’t want to risk her not signing it over out of retaliation. After that was taken care of I went over ways I could write this out. I thought of privately sending it to the people this happened to but I decided that doing that might bring up bad memories for those people when they were not ready for them.

I figured writing out my feelings and tagging it as “eenefandom” would be a better way to put this out there for people when they are ready to process it.

Some other members of the community that this also affected were: NintendoGal, Jenny2x4, Marshulion (i forget the spelling) and his partner that I forgot the name of. There was another person whose name I forgot as well but they were kin with Edd. We also were not kind to him.

So to all of those people and anyone else affected by those actions you are NOT obligated to forgive me but I apologize. Since Chris will likely never do it I will also apologize on her behalf. It was wrong. It was selfish. It was disgusting and revolting behavior. I know that I have a history of being bullied and I most likely fell into this pattern of behavior because I was projecting my pain. It’s no excuse, but I want to give some context. Once I did a lot of active work on processing this trauma in therapy, I began to change, but I am disappointed in myself that I hurt others along the way.