#edamile

they met before emil's hospitalization. according to emil's wiki and ada's deductions, ada saw emil while he was panhandling and noticed that he was starving, so she bought him a loaf of bread. this is one of the reasons he was so comfortable being treated by her; he remembered her kindness.

ada treats him like an equal. emil was literally treated like an animal during his time at the dog fighting pit, and when he first arrived at white sand street asylum, he was traumatized and his violent responses caused the staff to lock him in a cage and subject him to electroshock therapy and constant sedation. his entire life, he has been treated as subhuman. however, when ada meets him, she treats him with kindness and administers treatment gently. she sees through his current state and recognizes his humanity. she also tries to lower his dosage of sedatives, so that he can be conscious and think for himself. he is more than just a test subject to her. she sees him as a person.

ada asked for emil's consent. she realized her hypnotherapy was an effective way to help emil heal and recover, and she was excited to test her theories, but she asked emil whether he wanted to continue using the sedatives or work with her. emil chose to work with ada, and chose to leave the asylum with her.

ada resigns from her position as a psychologist. while she does still use hypnotherapy to help emil, she no longer works for the asylum. even though she still performs treatment on him, there isn't the same power imbalance that he would have with a staff member at the asylum.

the relationship itself is healthy. ada encourages emil to think independently, socialize with others, write in a diary, and participate in other healthy coping mechanisms. ada does have to take care of him a lot of the time because of his severe trauma, but she isn't possessive or controlling and her main goal is for him to recover.

hi sorry for being dead. love the new skins tho

by 阿雪🌨 @ Axue_snowflake

//THIS. This is a huge part of why people romanticizing this relationship is even more disappointing.

TW for discussion of domestic abuse going forward! Please read with care. 💕

//Abuse victims as a whole are usually blamed and disbelieved — but it happens in different ways for men who are survivors. A lot of people have this weird belief that men can’t be abused, because men are “too strong” to be abused, especially by women. This is not true at all! They get told “they must enjoy it” or that “they would leave if it was actually bad” and so many other terrible things.

//A lot of the time, women who are abusers play into toxic femininity as well — they are seen as “just wanting to help” or “not knowing any better”. They can lean into the stereotype of women being pure and innocent in order to gaslight their victims and deceive outsiders. Does this remind you of how Eda behaves? It should. And to see so many people going along with these flimsy excuses despite Eda’s actions being objectively abusive… it’s really, genuinely disappointing to me that so many people are so uneducated and so unwilling to listen to all the survivors who have spoken out.

//Emile’s responses to Eda — being anxious to the point of physical debilitation around other women, feeling he has to “prove” his love through perfect obedience and submission, etc. — are all TEXTBOOK trauma responses. Saying things like “it’s for your own good”, “I’m the only person who can help you”, and so on are all EXTREMELY manipulative tactics that abusers use to isolate their victims and make them feel they deserve the terrible treatment. And that’s not even touching on the ableism of it all too.

//TL;DR: Eda and Emile’s relationship is abusive, and plays specifically into common patterns present when men are victims of abusive women. Survivors who are men are uniquely dismissed in different ways than women are, it may explain — not justify — why so many fans are willing to overlook and defend the abuse Emile suffers from Eda.