#eboyshipping

so, you kept to yourself and drifted from corner to corner. james, your boyfriend, was off conversating with whoever he laid eyes on. he was a sweet soul, never afraid to talk to anyone, he was open to chitchat about anything and everything.

you had assured james that you would be completely okay on your own, getting a glass of coke every so often from the open bar was your way of making yourself feel comfortable. of course, you had seen many of your friends but you were the awkward type, the type to slip from a conversation whenever possible.

it wasn’t intentional, you were just scared.

while looking around the venue, totally unaware of your surroundings, you barged into someone. “oi! watch it, love” you didn’t recognise the voice at all, nonetheless you spun around and apologised profusely.

“i-i’m so sorry; i didn’t see you” the random bloke frowned at you and laughed “maybe if you paid more attention it wouldn’t have happened” he said before linking arms with the lady attached to his side, and walking away.

due to the interaction it filled you with a certain uneasy feeling, you felt extremely anxious. the type of anxious that made you feel queasy, the type that made you bite your lips in those certain places, the type of anxious that made you pick at the skin around your nails.

breathing out deeply, you headed in the direction of where your boyfriend said he would be. on the way, you had ensured you never took your eyes off the people around you.

as you approached the cozy seating area you seemed to stop in your tracks, you watched as you saw many pretty, gorgeous women sat around. they weren’t just any ol’ women, they were stunning!

perfect symmetry, amazing facial harmony, an hour glass figure you so desperately envied, you watched as they all laughed so sweetly, they laughed at everything; annoying or not it didn’t matter. it sounded like a sweet melody.

completely stopping in your tracks, your hands subconsciously moved to your exposed stomach. covering it, but then you remembered your thighs. god not them, you thought to yourself. i bet they don’t have big thighs.

of course they didn’t, why would they.

cutting james some slack, it’s not like it was just him surrounded by these women. it was him and his closest friends, will, mikey etc. but either way, it felt like someone had just punched you in the gut.

you felt horrible, it wasn’t his fault you felt this way. james has done nothing but show you constant love and affection, he praised the ground you walked on, he always made sure you were okay and felt loved.

trying to go unnoticed; you slipped between the crowd and found a wall to sit and sob at. your cry wasn’t one of those pretty girl cries, it was one full of emotion, tears, sweat and sadness. using the sleeves of your small top you wiped your eyes smudging the amount of eye makeup you had plastered on, in hopes of masking your true features.

james never understood why you did so, you were so so beautiful. yes, beautiful. the kind of beautiful that made you outshine every woman in existence to him. it wasn’t just your stunning looks that did it, it was your personality. yes you were shy, but he knew what you were like.

he knew you loved dancing to his music in the kitchen, he knew you loved to make him laugh whenever you thought he was off, he knew you cared about every little creature that roamed this earth, he knew YOU. and that’s all that matters.

even though you tried, will had noticed your saddened and teary eyes before you took off, he nudged james. to which he stood up immediately, not even saying his goodbyes.

after every tear you could muster up had left your body, james’ found you. leaning against the wall, staring into a lake. your head in your hand. he walked up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist.

“talk to me” is all he said, in such a sweet but nervous tone. turning around to face him, his heart broke. the mascara was no longer exentuating your eyelashes, it had fallen onto your cheeks. your lips were puffy, and your eyebrows were furrowed. you said nothing but fell into his chest.

your arms hugged one another, and your head lay in a certain position where you could hear his heartbeat. which admittedly, was going ten to the dozen.

“let’s go home” he took your hand in his and lead you back to a hotel where you two were staying for the night.

-

“i wish i was like them” you whimpered out, james head snapped towards you. he had put his phone down and came to sit next to you on the bed.

“like who?” he wrapped his arm around your waist and leaned into your gently.

“them girls” he struggled to know who you were on about, but soon figured it out. “baby they ar-” he was about to start until you interrupted him.

“they were so pretty. perfect everything, why can’t i have that? since i was younger i’ve alway tried to be better. be prettier. they looked at you so..so adoring. like they know they could steal you away in moments. i honestly wouldn’t blame them for thinking that. i mean, look at you; then look at me. i’m nothing compared to them. i have marks all over me, i have annoying freckles, i have scars. i hate it. why would you choose me..me out of everyone”

with every word it broke him, how could you think this? he wished you could see yourself through his eyes.

“i would choose you, again and again and again, in every life time. id choose you because i love you, and everything that you come with. your freckles aren’t annoying, they stunning, little do you know every night i kiss as many as i can” you looked up at him.

“yeah, and your scars? well they tell a story, a story many others can’t compare too. you are unique, and unique is better then fitting in. did you notice how those women looked the same, like the complete same. i mean like clones of each other, like out of fuckin star wars or somethin” you giggled a little from his comment.

“you, y/n, are amazing. you stand out from the crowd. no one else looks like you, and that’s a good thing. i have someone who is better then every other woman existence, you look like no other, you act like no other. you are you and id never change that for the world”

by the end, you were a teary mess, with your arms around his neck giving him the tightest hug you could. you repeated ‘i love you’ about a million times before he cut you off with a sweet kiss, one you both smiled into.

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