When Everything's Made to be Broken - Chapter 36: Please Don't Take It Personal
When Everything's Made to Be Broken Series (Archive of Our Own) | When Everything's Made to be Broken Masterlist (Tumblr)
Summary: After her meeting with Chris, Theo seeks out Loki to tell him all about her victory. She learns something new about him in the process.
Contents: mutually pining idiots! A bit of jealousy, a dash of bickering, and a sprinkle of domesticity on top.
Song: the mood i'm in / jsyk - the Maine
Word Count: 3,663
36. Please Don’t Take It Personal
Just so you know… So you know… Bury it (Keep on running out, keep on) Write it down (Keep on running out, keep on) Just so you know (Keep on running out, keep on) Yeah (Keep on running out, keep on)
Theo spent the entire day looking for Loki.
At first, she didn’t think anything of it. Both of them were busy, after all, and it wasn’t like they made plans to hang out. But he was the first person she wanted to tell about what happened and how she stood up for herself, and the fact she couldn’t easily find him was more troubling than she wanted to admit. Knocking on his door gave no answer, so she checked the library, then the gym…but in each place, she didn’t find any sign he’d been there. Hell, she even grew desperate enough to check the roof, despite the fact it had been pouring rain all day.
Nothing. No sign he was around at all, or had been around at any point in the day.
Each failure to locate him made a small, irritating knot form in Theo’s chest; a thought that maybe she missed something, or maybe he was avoiding her. She caught herself rolling her eyes at the idea; after all, they were past the point where he’d avoid her if he was mad at her… right?
After each fruitless round of searching, she’d trudge back to her room and try to occupy herself for a bit—painting, practicing instruments, reading medical journals—but the question of where he was and why she couldn’t find him never left the back of her mind, leaving her restless and distracted. It was only a matter of time before she’d abandon her half-hearted distractions and set out on another search.
Her stubborn need to locate him, combined with a pang in her stomach and the realization she hadn’t eaten a damn thing all day, led her on the next search.
Once again, knocking on Loki’s door brought no result.
As she made her way down the hall, the scent of garlic and rosemary floated towards her, accompanied by the sizzle of something cooking on the stove. The mouth-watering combination was all it took for her to decide to make a quick stop in the shared kitchen; after all, she hadn’t found him for hours, so what difference would a few more minutes make?
When she turned the corner into the kitchen, she stopped in her tracks.
There he was—standing at the stove, hair tied back loosely with a few strands falling free, sleeves shoved past his elbows as he worked. The black collared shirt clung just enough to trace the shape of him: the broad cut of his shoulders, the long lines tapering down his back. Each shift of muscle pulled at the fabric, precise and unhurried, like he had all the time in the world. His forearms flexed with every measured turn of the wooden spoon, revealing glimpses of lean muscles in the warm kitchen light.
And then there were the jeans: dark, slim-fitted, hugging his legs and leaving little mystery about the shape of his hips or the way his ass fit perfectly in them. Sharp, toned, distractingly perfect.
He was wholly absorbed in the slow swirl of vegetables and cream-colored sauce, seemingly oblivious, while she stood there doing something much less dignified: staring.
Her mouth twitched, equal parts exasperated and entertained by herself. She’d spent the whole day half-convinced he hated her, and the second she found him she was ogling him like a shameless groupie. Still, her eyes lingered longer than they should have before she finally dragged them upwards, silently praying he didn’t notice. She bit the inside of her cheek, heat prickling at the back of her neck.
“You need not lurk in the distance,” Loki’s voice was low, smooth, carrying that faint edge that made it hard to tell whether he was amused or irritated. “If you have something to say, say it.”
“I’ve been looking for you,” Theo admitted, closing the distance until she stood beside him, leaning her hip against the counter. “But I couldn’t find you anywhere. I started to think you were… avoiding me.” She let the words hang, teasing but not daring to press too hard.
He didn’t answer right away, eyes on the pan. Then, the corner of his mouth lifted ever-so-slightly. “I have been… occupied,” he said, deliberately vague, though his gaze flicked toward her for a fraction of a second.
“Occupied?” she echoed, raising an eyebrow. “Cooking? Working? Errands? Or playing hide and seek with me and not telling me?”
A flicker of green light pulsed across his sleeve as his fingers tightened briefly on the handle of the spoon. “A combination, perhaps,” he said carefully, stirring again. His voice softened just enough that it wasn’t entirely a joke. “I imagine the means by which I occupy my time are not why you sought me out...”
“You’re my friend and I wanted to talk to you?” Theo tried, though Loki sent her a look that told her he knew better.
“… You wish to discuss your rendezvous,” He said flatly, turning back to the stove. After a heavy pause, he sighed. “Dare I ask about the outcome?”
Theo opened her mouth, ready to launch into the sharp little speech she’d rehearsed all day…
… Only for every word to vanish on her tongue.
The neat satisfaction of proving him wrong, of showing she wasn’t rattled—it all crumbled to dust in the silence between them. All she could think of instead was that damn comment of his from before, about why he didn’t date, about how civilians could never understand.
It was ridiculous that the comment was what stuck, looping in her head while she stood there grasping for anything to say. Her jaw tightened as her fingers drummed restlessly against her arm, nails grazing over her sleeve in short, impatient bursts. She shifted her weight, bracing her hip harder into the counter as if grounding herself against her own annoyance.
Eventually, she took a deep breath, letting it out slowly and cursing herself all the while, before she answered: “…You were right.”
That drew Loki’s gaze fully to her, hard and sharp. His eyes studied her reaction, tracking every flick of her fingers and the curve of her lips. “I explicitly told you not to come crying to me when he hurt—”
“—No, not about that.” She cut him off with a quick shake of her head. “If anyone left that conversation crying, it was him.”
He stilled, spoon paused mid-stir. When it resumed, it moved slower, more deliberately. One dark brow arched, lips pressed thin. “Is that so? At the fundraiser, you said it was not worth it to destroy him.”
“I didn’t destroy him,” Theo countered, confidence returning with a smug twist to her mouth. “I just called him on his bullshit. Not my fault he didn’t like the truth.”
For a flicker of a second, the line of his jaw eased. Not approval, exactly, but something closer to reluctant surprise. His eyes darted briefly to her fingers gripping the edge of the counter. “That is… not quite what I expected you to say.”
“I told you, I wasn’t going because I still had feelings for him,” Theo said, rolling her eyes. “I went because I had questions. The chance to tell him off was just icing on the cake.”
“Questions?” His voice was calm, but she noticed his grip on the spoon tighten, knuckles pale against the wood.
Theo’s shoulders tensed, but she forced them to relax; working herself up wouldn’t do anyone any good.
“I wanted to know why he left—” she explained, careful to keep her tone casual, nonchalant, “—if what the tabloids spun was true, or if there was more to it.”
Loki’s gaze followed her movements, tracking her hands as they shifted along the counter, and then he folded his arms in perfect mimicry of her own. The wooden spoon clattered faintly as it landed in the pan, more forceful than necessary. “Did you get your answer?”
“Yeah...” She let out a second, heavier breath. “That’s what I meant about you being right: Avengers and civilians don’t mix.”
For the first time, the sharpness in his eyes dulled, and the scowl he wore faded into something more sullen.
“Typically I relish any opportunity to be correct,” he reluctantly admitted, “But for once it does not hold its usual joy.”
“It’s fine,” Theo waved him off before the heaviness in his tone could settle. “I know now.”
His gaze lingered on her a beat too long, tracking the small curve of her shoulder. “Was it worth your time to meet with him?”
“Yeah, actually.” She found herself smiling, wry and a little surprised. “Turns out I had a lot to say.”
Loki’s chest lifted with a slow inhale, then he tilted his head. His eyes flicked to her fingers again, noticing how she flexed them unconsciously. “Such as?”
“I told him how fucked up it was to constantly degrade someone who protected him from shadow beasts twice and who hadn’t publicly said a bad thing about him, despite having every reason to do so. And how much of a dick move it was to break up with me in a voicemail when he knew I was injured and miserable from fighting; even if he was being honest and was scared about the possibility of me dying someday in a fight, he could have at least waited to tell me to my face. I also told him he needed to call his PR team off and stop using women as a scapegoat for his shortcomings, and that he needed therapy.” She laughed outright, thinking about the way sat there, floundering amidst her verbal onslaught. “He looked like he was about to shit himself when I left.”
“Do you think he will do so?” Loki’s tone was flat, but the faintest glint of amusement caught the edges of his eyes.
“I don’t know. I don’t think anyone’s ever challenged him like that before.”
“And if he does not relent?”
“The best revenge is a life well-lived.” Theo shrugged, a small smile tugging at her lips. “If someone asks me about it, I’ll be honest. But I’m not wasting my time responding to him.”
His gaze sharpened again, shoulders drawing taut. His fingers flexed once against the counter, then rested, betraying a flash of tension. “If someone asks?”
“Well…” Theo tilted her head, eyes flicking to his, teasing lightly though her voice stayed calm. “You remember that song I helped record? Loved You A Little? I’m sure when it comes out, people will ask if it’s related.”
The shift in him was immediate, like a door slamming shut. His voice was low, each word measured: “You’ve asserted repeatedly that your feelings for him were not love; and yet, you contributed to a song about loving him?”
Theo stared at him, unimpressed. “If I was just a lie to you, well you were less than that to me—never loved you a little,” She sang, letting the lyric bite the air between them. “It’s literally about not being in love. The guys from The Maine wrote it. They just asked me to sing.”
His jaw eased, but only barely.
He turned back to the stove, adjusting the pan with too much force. The spoon trembled in its orbit before steadying again. His shoulder brushed the edge of the range hood as he leaned over, subtle but stiff, and she caught the faintest tension in his posture.
“What’s gotten into you?” Theo frowned. “You’re acting so weird about this.”
He flicked a glance at her, green eyes unreadable, then back to the pan. “I assumed you were truthful when you said you no longer cared for the actor. Yet after one meeting, after a song that could be twisted to his name, it appears you’ve devoted more energy to him than you claimed. It is reasonable to question.”
“Seriously?” She blinked, incredulous. “That’s what you took from everything I just said?”
He didn’t answer right away, jaw tight, eyes fixed on the pan though he hadn’t so much as touched it. She noticed the way his shoulders tensed slightly each time her eyes flicked to him.
“I told him to go fuck himself,” Theo said sharply. “I humiliated him. I’m not keeping quiet anymore, which means no one can mistake me for still caring. And the song? It’s catchy. I like the band. End of story.” Her voice dropped, fiercer and more resolute: “Nothing about this says I want him. Everything about it says I don’t. If anything, you should be glad I’m standing up for myself instead of letting him drag me down.”
His lips pressed thin, silence stretching again—but she noticed the way his hand flexed once against the counter before curling into a fist. A shadow of something unspoken passed over his face.
“You risk being hurt again if you do not return to ignoring him.” When he finally spoke, his voice was quiet, strained. “He was never worth your time.”
Theo’s own shoulders loosened at that. “I don’t intend to spend another second on Chris. You don’t have to worry about that.” Then, softer, she said, "I wouldn't have agreed to the whole ‘be seen together’ plan if I wanted to be with anyone else.”
Loki’s jaw ticked slightly. His eyes flicked to her lips, then back to her face, and a brief tension lingered in his neck, almost imperceptible, before he exhaled slowly.
The words seemed to land differently than she meant them to. Loki’s head tilted, eyes fixed on her, a flicker of something raw and unguarded in his expression before he masked it. His shoulders eased, the air around him cooling.
“… Then it seems I owe you an apology for my assumptions.” His voice was quieter now, almost hesitant. He drummed his fingers against the counter once, then stilled them. “Perhaps I might make amends by taking you out for dinner?”
Theo blinked, caught off guard. From what she could tell, he was in the middle of making dinner and had wanted nothing to do with her, but now he wanted to go out? “Taking me out to dinner?”
“Yes,” he said quickly, too quickly. “If you’re amenable. I recall that you recently mentioned a new restaurant to try...”
“I appreciate the offer, and I’d be down to go,” She couldn’t help a small laugh. “I just wasn’t sure how that worked when you were already cooking something…”
“Ah, yes,” His mouth twitched, though the usual sharpness of his wit softened at the edges. “I see where the confusion might arise. Though I must confess, despite my title of Prince I do not think I could secure a reservation on such short notice.”
“Can’t win ‘em all, I guess.” Her eyes flicked toward the stove, where the pan still steamed gently. She pushed off the counter and wandered closer, leaning just enough to peek at what he was stirring. “So… what are you making, anyway?”
Loki followed her gaze, then gave a careless little shrug that didn’t match the precision of the spoon as it stirred again under his control. His eyes lingered on her for a fraction longer than necessary. “An experiment.”
“Dangerous words coming from you.” Theo arched a brow, shoulder brushing briefly against his arm before she retreated back against the counter. She noticed the way his hand flexed slightly at the brief contact. “Should I be worried you’re brewing potions in your kitchen now?”
“If I were, you’d be the first to know.” He plucked the spoon from the air, dipping it once before holding it out to her, steam curling upward. His fingers hovered just a beat longer than needed around the handle, almost as if measuring her reaction. “Taste, and tell me if I’ve succeeded.”
Theo hesitated; not because she doubted him, but because of the way he held it, steady and expectant, eyes fixed on her as though her opinion mattered more than he would admit. In that moment, the kitchen seemed quieter, the faint hiss of the stove filling the space between them. She leaned forward, lips brushing the edge of the spoon.
Warm, savory, richer than she’d expected. She licked a trace from her lip, surprise turning into a smile.
“That’s… actually really good.”
“Actually?” His tone was dry, tinged with a playful offense, but his eyes softened at her approval. His gaze flicked down for a heartbeat to her hands resting lightly on the counter before returning to her face.
“Yeah, turns out you aren’t half bad in a kitchen,” She smirked as she straightened, hip finding its place against the counter again. “Do you only break the culinary skills out when no one’s watching, or have you been hiding this talent from me on purpose?”
He stilled for half a second, the pan forgotten. It wasn’t much, but she noticed it — the tiny falter before he moved again, the subtle tension in his shoulders. The corner of his mouth twitched, and instead of replying he busied himself with the pan, turning his shoulder to her as though suddenly very interested in the food.
Theo tilted her head, catching the small tell, and let her amusement curl at the edges of her voice. “Actually, now that I think about it… we go out to eat all the time.” She gestured toward the pan with a teasing curve of her mouth. “Maybe the apology should be to cook me dinner sometime, instead.”
For once, he seemed almost caught. His grip on the spoon tightened, knuckles paling before he forced his hand to relax. A beat passed, quiet and suspended, before he said without looking at her, “You believe my cooking could serve as adequate penance?”
The pause stretched, longer than it should have, filled with the soft simmer of the pan and the low hum of the refrigerator. Theo shifted against the counter, folding her arms, pressing one shoulder slightly forward as if to anchor herself against the subtle tension in the room. She noticed his eyes flick to her shoulder, then quickly back to the pan, as though he didn’t want her to see he’d noticed.
“I think it’d be more than adequate,” she said finally, letting the tease carry but softer now, warmer. Out of the corner of her eye, she caught the faintest flush at the tips of his ears — the only betrayal of his calm.
Something in his expression shifted when he finally glanced back at her — a faint, unguarded glimmer of satisfaction, quickly masked beneath his usual composure. His shoulders eased slightly, but she noticed the micro-movement of his fingers curling once around the spoon, a subtle echo of his attention on her.
He didn’t look flustered, but the corner of his mouth quirked upward, and the faintest trace of a smile softened the lines around his eyes. Even his posture, still upright and controlled, had a subtle tilt toward her. “I daresay, then, I shall have to rise to the occasion.”
She laughed softly, stepping back toward the counter, brushing lightly past him in the motion. The contact was fleeting, but it lingered in the small warmth of the kitchen. She noticed his chest shift slightly, the faintest exhale that hadn’t been there before. “I’ll hold you to that.”
A beat passed, easy now, almost companionable. His eyes flicked back to hers, steady and intent.
“Have you eaten?” His voice lowered, the timbre less of a question and more like an invitation. “I’m quite certain there’s plenty here for two.”
“Well…” Her smile curled, clever and bright, but softer at the edges now. She tipped her chin toward him, eyes catching the gleam of his. “Since you went to all the trouble of poisoning me already, it’d be rude not to see how the rest of it turns out.”
Theo moved first, slipping past him to help set the table. The soft clink of ceramic filled the air as she retrieved plates from the cabinet, passing them to Loki so he could plate the food. Their movements fell into an easy rhythm, unspoken but seamless — her setting out silverware as he carried the plates to the table, the small domesticity of it almost startling in its simplicity.
“Wine?” she asked, plucking a pair of glasses from the cabinet and holding them up for Loki’s approval.
“Yes,” Loki replied, turning back to Theo with a bottle dangling between his fingers. “A small indulgence I picked up off-world. I thought it might suit the occasion.”
She gave him a sidelong look as she took the bottle from him, trying not to blush when their fingers brushed. “You mean your kitchen experiment?”
His mouth twitched, the faintest shadow of a smirk. “Precisely.”
Theo handed him a glass, keeping her own raised. “Then—” her grin widened, playful and teasing, “—to not dying from your experiment.”
He lifted his in answer, crystalline light catching the dark liquid. “To your remarkable bravery in tasting it.”
She clinked his glass with a little laugh. “To discovering your cooking skills after all this time.”
He took the volley smoothly, the curve of his mouth deepening as he met her gaze over the rim. “To your persistence in uncovering them.”
Theo’s smile curled, clever and bright, but her eyes betrayed the flicker of warmth she couldn’t quite hide. She tipped her glass toward his once more, letting the sparkle of the moment carry them forward.
The glasses chimed again, laughter chasing away the hush, and together they settled in to share their private meal.
If I've been unapproachable Or I seem too emotional Life has been a rollercoaster So it goes, I've been Avoiding confrontational Bullshit conversations, so If I forgot to say hello Please don't take it personal
I just need you to say like, "Okay” Okay?
---
Author’s note: HI SORRY I’M LATE. I know last time I said a short break might come from my grandma passing, but that ended up not being the reason for my delay (thankfully!!)… the actual reason was that I didn’t quite like how this chapter was flowing/reading and needed a bit of extra time to get the characters feeling more true to themselves, and unfortunately that also fell during the two busiest workweeks of the year (for me) because of back to school.
I’m not a teacher but I work in education, and a big part of my role involves helping new students prepare for the year and training peer mentors for different programs; trying to keep it semi-vague as to not share identifying info lol). This was my fourth “back to school” in my current role and it was without a doubt the smoothest, best one yet! I’m so happy with how it went and I got a lot of positive feedback from folks all over the school, from students to school leadership.
Still, it was a hectic couple of weeks—I was literally writing on my phone between student leader training sessions because that was when I had time to work on it and I didn’t want to lose ideas when they came up 🤣
Grandma’s still here—she definitely has slowed down, but I was able to travel to see her (and my family) last weekend and she knew we were there, which was nice.
It’s still a bit busier than usual for me as school activities start ramping up with the start of the academic year, so out of an abundance of caution I’m going to say the next update can be expected by Sunday, September 14th Thursday, September 25. If I think it’s ready sooner then I’ll post early, but just looking at what I have going on at the moment I think it’s most likely going to be worth taking the extra time so I don’t feel rushed (and compromise on quality!).
Thanks y’all for the kindness amidst the chaos of life, and for following along through everything—I appreciate you so, so much and I hope you enjoy this update! Feel free to come say hi and chat on my blog, or if AO3 is more your speed, would love to hear your thoughts via a comment! Take care and have a great weekend! 🥰














