#duskthetwisted

9. favorite smell in the summer?OH i think linden trees... they give me good soft feelings from my times in czech

29. best way to bond with you?oh boy that’s a hard one because the stars and planets have to align a bit. if i’m going through a lot of stuff in my life (such as recently), it’s hard for me to have both the time, energy, and emotional reserves to actively bond with someone new! i already have a lot of friendships and commitments i’m working on nurturing as best as i can!BUTit still happens, sometimes!- first of all, the interest has to be mutual!! i have to have an interest in talking to you, and this has often happened by way of interacting in forums or group chats, or by being twitter mutuals for a couple months/years, and suddenly getting wrapped up in a conversation taken to a DM, and it keeps going from there. it doesn’t guarantee a friendship, but it’s often the start of one.- i tend to befriend other creators a lot! fandoms/interests come and go, but by befriending someone with whom i bond over the act of creation itself, be it fanwork or original content, tends to set a pretty solid foundation!  obviously i am friends with plenty of non-creator people, but i tend to notice people who put out Content, and that’s what often creates an interest in me to interact with them to begin with. also just... having any connection beyond “omg we’re in the same fandom” is Pretty Dang Important when it comes to having a fulfilling friendship.- sincerity and exploration of identity and self! i don’t know how it ends up being that way but there’s something about Deep Talks At 2AM that just... it sticks, ya feel? there’s some kinda intimacy in sharing something deeply personal to another human being, maybe somehting you just realized or have never told anyone before. AGAIN, this has to be mutual. if someone i’ve never really interacted with before suddenly messages me with some really personal info out of nowhere in hopes of befriending me, that’s honestly kind of off-putting. however, if it’s like “hey you spoke about this thing that really resonated with me, can i tell you about X or Y or my take on the same aspect?” then that’s much better.

i don’t know if this was the reply the question asked, haha. maybe it just wanted something like “take me to a movie and buy me food” but it’s like... over the past year or even longer, there’s been a lot of people who have REALLY wanted to be my friends, and i wish i could indulge every single one of you, but it’s... just not possible. in some cases, people have very badly overstepped my explicit boundaries multiple times. sometimes people put me on a pedestal that makes it really awkward for me to interact with them. it NEEDS to be equal, it NEEDS to be mutual, it NEEDS to happen organically.i just don’t have room for everyone. just because i can’t reciprocate a friendship doesn’t mean you’re not a wonderful or interesting person! maybe in another timeline, we’re best buds! as it is now, i am thoroughly socially and emotionally exhausted, and incapable of actively build up new relationships unless someone clicks with me so naturally it takes no effort at all - and that is incredibly rare. you’re much more likely to stew in a Social Media Acquaintanceship for a very long time before an opportunity presents itself.and that being said - wanting to be someone’s friend is great and wonderful, but pining after someone’s attention is... not really worth it. it hurts more than it rewards you, in the end. i’m just one out of many, many wonderful people - put your energy towards relationships that are rewarding rather than draining.