Dear Mr Fabius
Question 1
How do you sanitize your lab coat
Question 2
How do you take care of the leather on your lab coat
Question 3
How many lab coats have you gone through. How time intensive is it to make a new one
‘It's not a damn lab coat – it's a fashion statement!’ Duco's aggressively hunched shoulders and clenched teeth compensate for what his genes deny him with the lack of expression in his black eyes: it's perfectly clear who he's parodying here!
Oleander laughs, chokes on the smoke and, with a short, barking cough, hands the heretical tobacco pipe back to the Night Lord. The latter waves the datapad with the inbox and continues to escalate his imitation of the Chief Apothecary.
With a contemptuous shake of his head, he lifts his pointed chin.
"Really! What do people think? That I walk around with something like this out of pure vanity?‘ Just because he can, he adds Fabius' favourite punctuation mark, ’So!" Then he takes the pipe from Oleander, completely unimpressed by the supposed relic of his gene-father.
Oleander leans back, letting his gaze wander over the tooth-stump aesthetics of the old world. He breathes in deeply, taking in the dusty smell of the past.
‘But seriously. I really do wonder what he thinks he's doing with that thing. He only uses it to make others feel uncomfortable when he shows up with it. He doesn't do surgeries in it if he can avoid it. He doesn't even like the thing.’
Duco shrugs. Purple smoke billows from between his pointed teeth as he exhales. "The Chief Apothecary is such a better son of Fulgrim than you, my friend! He has drama in his bones. That's why he keeps the thing, repairs it, and makes sure it looks nice and disgusting. People see it, people fear it. Even more than Torment. Here in the Eye, everyone and their dog has a demonic weapon. But a coat like this shows that you mean business."
The Night Lord taps the ‘Re’ symbol and types quickly.
"1 - Not at all. This is all nature and needs to be cared for, not destroyed. 2 - Grease (Grox grease works, but for best results, use the grease of an Imperial cleric), water-proof with treated Plaguebearer acid in reliably bad weather. 3 - Does the Ship of Theseus mean anything to you?"
With a satisfied sound, he presses send.
Oleander takes the pipe back from him. ‘At some point, he'll find out that we always reply to his fan mail, and that'll be the day he kills us all.’
Duco laughs.
