#drunkphilosophy

I see a lot of hate for celebrities. Some of them deserve it for saying absolutely outrageous things, some of them don't deserve it because all they did was fuck up. But it's interesting that they get that much hate when some lesser mortal like myself might just incur a telling-off or whatever. It's intriguing to watch the mighty become mortal. It's the opposite side of the coin (for me, at any rate) to meeting a celebrity in person. Whether they're my favourite musicians or a famous actor or author, there's something magical about meeting them in person and talking to them, because suddenly they leap off the page, out of the screen, and into reality. they stand before you in all their perfection. but if they say or do something problematic, whether it's punching a paparazzo or saying something that could be construed as racist or sexist, then all of a sudden they are evil and need to be eviscerated. Of course, what has actually happened is that they have fallen from the pedestal we put them on, and we are so upset by the realisation of how human they are, how much like us they are, that we turn violent and stamp on them.

I like my women like I like my scotch. Dark and no younger than 13.

A plus B equals C. And you have a left nostril and right nostril which is legit. You have to breathe. And you have stripes. On your nose. I'd like to lick them off. I bet you taste good. I've got the salty De Niro going on.

You know how bad it would be if I stepped in lava? I don't have health insurance! You'd be dating a pirate, R______! I'd have to wear roller skates everywhere, and it wouldn't even work right because I'd just have stumps... I'd be a constant roller disco. You know what you can't do if you have no feet? CHANT!

In Mother Russia, drive cars you. Wait- shit.