#dpr angst

Ian stumbled on his way back inside and someone caught him by the elbow. “You’re really drunk. Sit and drink some water,” the woman from the balcony said and assisted Ian in sitting. “Where do you live, I’ll help you get home,” she offered. “Y/n, don’t worry about me, I'm doing fine,” Ian slurred. “No you aren’t, not in the state that you’re in,” Y/n countered, “Tell me where you live,” she asked again. He proceeds to say her address and when she tells him that’s not where he lives anymore, he insists that he lives there and it’s the only address he gives even when she asks again and again. She took his phone and tried to unlock his phone and was surprised the passcode is still their anniversary. She tried to look for clues as to where he lives now but couldn’t find any and she didn’t want to contact his friends because she sort of broke up with them too when she and Ian ended things.

Y/n settled the bills and went out to hail a cab. Not knowing where to bring Ian, she decided to bring him home with her. In the cab, Ian was slumped against the window and was mumbling something incoherent. The cab hit the brakes hard at one intersection which caused Ian to hit his head against the window pretty hard, so y/n pulled him closer for safety purposes and Ian rested his head against her shoulder. “Y/n, I’m sorry. When I left you all alone, girl, I know that wasn't fair. 'Cause I loved you. I still love you,” Ian mumbled. She was quite taken aback by this and she just looked out the window and let the tears fall.

When they arrived home, Y/n was quite surprised that Ian was still able to navigate his way through the apartment. It’s like muscle memory kicked in or Ian just remembers the apartment layout subconsciously; they did live here together for most of their relationship. She followed Ian and turned away when she saw him undress and get into bed. Once he was settled and seemed to be deeply asleep, she washed up and settled to sleep on the couch in the living room. Sharing a bed tonight doesn’t seem to be a wise decision despite what she heard him say a while ago.

Ian woke up with a pounding headache and a parched mouth. He slowly rose to a sitting position and noticed that he wasn’t at his place, but he knows this room, he lived here two years ago. He rubs his face thinking he might be dreaming but the surroundings do not change, he doesn’t miraculously wake up in his own bed, and slowly he remembers what transpired last night. He came to the conclusion that he didn’t conjure her in his drunken state. How else would he end up here if she wasn’t actually there? Ian looked around and saw that he occupied the bed alone and thought she might’ve slept elsewhere. 

Ian washed up and found a new toothbrush, still at the same place where she kept them before. He put his clothes back on and made his way to the kitchen quietly to get some water, maybe nab a tylenol and leave. On his way to the door, he sees her asleep on the couch and debates whether to leave or stay and talk. Before he gets to decide, Y/n stirs and Ian freezes. She sits up, yawns and stretches, and is startled to see Ian standing by one of the chairs, looking puzzled at what to do with the current situation.

He waited as the post loaded, trying to blink the sleep away before settling on rubbing his eyes. Finally looking at the loaded post, Christian smiled

ynissamood: I know you guys are excited for the series to be released but I promise that once the project is released and I get the okay, you guys get to enjoy this! Miss you goofballs~ xoxo

The photo was one where you were sitting on a table, Scott directly behind you as he grinned into the camera. Gyungmo had his bucket hat over his eyes and gave a hand gesture as John gave a peace sign next to him, and Cline, as always, looked at the camera with all seriousness. Christian was on your other side, sitting right next to you with his arms crossed as he gave the camera a smile.

Christian started with a simple hello, thinking twice before erasing it and trying again. He stared at his screen, tilting his head as he thought of what was the appropriate ice breaker. As he continued to beat himself up, Christian gave up and wrote what he thought was best and pressed sent.

You looked over at the ping from your phone, seeing an Instagram notification. You barely paid attention as you unlocked your phone, eyes focused on the TV screen in front of you, the movie that was on was too good. But you finally focused on your phone and felt shocked at the message.

You blocked Christian after everything happened between you both, knowing fully well that he wanted nothing to do with you. So of course, it seemed out of the blue that he messaged you with a simple hey, one that you clearly had no way on figuring out what it could mean.

You hesitated on answering, not knowing exactly what to say so you instead opted for a more simple and easier solution: exiting the app and ignoring him.

Christian couldn't sleep for the rest of the night, tossing and turning as he thought about checking his phone. He didn't want to seem too eager, trying his best to make time pass by so he can check the message later but the ticking of the wall clock only made his curiosity grow. Finally, with a snatch, Christian took the phone, seeing no notification and he figured you were busy.

"So instead of thinking that she ignored you, you thought she was busy?"

Gyungmo looked at the simple message that Christian sent, showing in fact that you left him on read. Scott's laughter made Christian look away, trying to hide his embarrassment. "You're too whipped," Gyungmo chuckled, Christian taking his phone back.

"Leave me the hell alone, okay? A guy could hope," Christian rolled his eyes, going back to his laptop and going back to work.

The new album and the music video were done. The release date was set and all that was left was for the gang to post it. And, once again, Christian sent you another message.

You shared the post from the DPR page on your Instagram story, accompanied by the eyes emoji and the clapping hands. You felt bad leave Christian on read the first time, not liking it one bit but you worried that he wanted to start trouble again. So you ignored his second message, only saying hello.

Christian sat on his couch, laptop in front of him and music playing when his phone lit up, showing that you were live.

You laid on your bed, phone resting against your pillows as you laughed at a comment Christian seemed to miss, but he couldn't take his eyes off you. You had cut your hair, and freshly dyed it to a dark blue color, complimenting you very well.

"Yeah, I decided it was time for a new change," You gently touched your hair, eyes skimming the comments. "I bought myself new clothes, but then I decided to just take it a step further and changed my hair."

Christian saw a comment from Gyungmo pop up making you smile.

dprcream: new hair? let's match

"Dye your hair blue so I know what we have it real," You giggled, moving your arm to rest your head on it. You continued to read the comments, smiling at some and answering them. Christian bit his lip, getting nervous as he got an idea and began to type sending his message.

dprian: Nice hair!  dprian: Lori misses you. She says hi

You stayed quiet, Christian beginning to think you ignored him before you let out a smile, humming softly. "Tell Lori I miss her much more. I wanna see her again," Christian felt his heart flutter, finally getting a response from you and trying his luck again.

dprian: Come over soon, it's not the same in the building without you

You read the message, your lips curving up into a smile at the comment. Maybe it was for show, hiding the fact that an argument between the two of you happened and for you, it was okay. After all, the fans didn't need to get involved. "I'll try to go soon, but if you guys find yourselves around my parts, let me know."

You answered people's questions and talked about upcoming projects before bidding everyone a good night, blowing kisses right as the live shut off. Christian set his phone down, thinking about the live when his phone pinged, making him look at it. He was surprised to see your name on the Instagram notification, going into the messages to see what you had sent.

ynissamood: Listen, you probably did that as a way for people not to suspect what happened between us and that's okay, but please stop sending me messages. I unblocked you so people wouldn't get the wrong idea. I'm sorry for what happened between us, but this is your fault too.

Christian read the message over and over again before he let out a breath, not able to believe what he read. He knew this was his fault too, and he was trying to fix it but it seemed you didn't want that. And, to be frank, Christian had no one to blame but himself.

"Damn, your fucked up big time," Scott shook his head, giving Christian his phone back.

"So what do I do?" Christian asked, dropping the phone on the table in front of him. "How do I apologize for being an absolute asshole?"

"I mean, by doing it ," Scott shrugged, crossing his arms. "Tell her you're sorry and you want to start over."

Christian knew it was his fault too, and if he had to be honest, he knew that it was only his fault. After all, he couldn't blame you for how you felt, this was all on him. And he wanted to fix it as soon as he could. He wanted to go back to the way you both were, comfortable around each other, laughing and enjoying the company like no one's business. But, he had to cross this bridge in order to get there.

Christian stared at his phone that night, biting his lip and messing around with his hair before going into the messages and sending one over.

dprian: Listen, I'm sorry too. I know what I did was out of line but I want to start over. Can we talk? Like over the phone?

It had been over three days since the message was sent and you haven't even opened the message. It wasn't like you weren't online, because you were, but you just didn't open the message. So, Christian decided that he would let you be for a bit before he tried again.

A couple more days passed, the gang finishing the last bit of touches for the release when Gyungmo noticed the notification of a new video from you. He knew Scott had to have been watching it by now so Gyungmo went off to watch the video.

Scott sat on his chair, watching as you messed with a bag, sighing.

"I don't know how to explain it but it's just... an ugly feeling. Like when you're trying your best to draw something but it doesn't come out like you want it to... kind of like that," You played with the drawstring on the bag a bit more, biting your lip before the video cut. 

It was a brief moment of you looking out the window, shutting it quickly and yelping when the delivery man spotted you. "I hope he's not judging me... I ordered like 5 large fries..."

"I think I'm gonna take a break from social media for a bit..." The video cut right back to you, sitting at the end of your bed. Legs now crossed as you gave the camera a soft smile. "I'll still post the series and give you guys a heads up but that's about it for me. I just want to take a breather," With one final wave and with a kiss, the video went black.

You smiled at the text from Scott that came in, giving him a call and hearing it ring before his voice was heard. "Are you okay? What's wrong?"

You giggle a bit, taking a seat on your bed. "I'm okay, I just need a break from social media, don't worry much about me."

"Hey, have you heard from y/n?" Gyungmo walked into Scott's studio, Scott flinching a bit from being startled. You laughed as you heard the two argue, Scott trying to explain to him that you were fine while Gyungmo tried to take the phone.

"Do you need me to go over? I'll go right now," Gyungmo laughed as he heard your laughter.

He was about to grab the phone when Scott yanked it away, laughing. You laid on your bed, feeling better when another voice caught your attention. You could hear Christian ask what was going on, Scott answering.

"Hey, we'll call you back, okay?" You knew Gyungmo was doing this for you, knowing that you didn't want to talk to Christian but you let out a breath.

You had to face him one day, and this seemed like a better time, even though you preferred much later. So, as you sat up in bed, you took in a breath, shaking your head. "Lemme talk to him, please?"

"You sure?" Gyungmo turned to Christian who gave him a curious look, Gyungmo hearing you assure him. With some hesitation, Gyungmo handed the phone over to Christian, who stared at it for a bit before taking it.

"Hello?"

You stayed quiet for a bit, biting your tongue before gulping your nerves. "Hey, it's me,"

Christian froze at your voice, looking at Gyungmo and Scott who watched him. Christian hummed, walking out of the room and heading to his studio, and closing the door behind him, locking it in case that Scott or Gyungmo tried to go after him. "Hey, you okay?"

"Yeah, I just need a break from social media... It's getting to be too much," You played with the end of you hair, letting your hand fall to your bed. "How have you been?"

"You know, working and all that," Christian sat on his chair, listening to a bit of rustling on your side.

It was quiet between the two of you, and awkward silence filing you the air. "I'm sorry for being an asshole, I was just mad at you,"

"No, it's okay... I didn't know you had a girlfriend and honestly I was an asshole about it too since I was so hurt about it..." You confessed, hands gripping your shirt.

"Chaeyoung isn't my girlfriend, well, she was never my girlfriend." Your eyebrows furrowed, staying quiet to hear him correctly. "I mean- yeah I dated her, but really it was only for the fact that I wanted to make you jealous. I thought you and Scott were dating." Christian's voice got low, letting you process his confession.

"Wait, you thought that Scott and I...?"

"Yeah, so..." Christian sighed, letting his head fall to his free hand. "I knew Chaeyoung liked me and I used her to get back at you. I figured that eventually I'd forget about you and return the feelings for Chaeyoung but I never did." Christian could hear your breathing, but other than that, it was nothing but silence. "Listen, I'm sorry and I know I was an asshole about it..." Christian trailed off, hearing you giggle before your laughter.

"Wow... and here I thought you were mad at me for kissing you when you had a girlfriend... you really are an asshole,"

Christian let out a breath, laughing along and shaking his head, feeling the weight of anxiety leave him. "I'm so sorry,"

"It's fine, but please tell me Chaeyoung knows and you're still not leading her on or I'll kick you ass,"

"No, she knows. She broke up with me that day in the studio," Christian laughed, his hand moving from covering his face to holding his chin. "I really like you, I still do,"

Your laughter died down, butterflies in your stomach erupting as you whined into the phone. "Don't start acting cute just because we confessed to each other, I'm still mad at you and I'm still going to ignore you,"

Christian couldn't help the laugh that came up and nodded, leaning back into his chair. "Fine, fine... I have to go but I'll text you later?"

You rolled your eyes, shaking your head but smiling. "You better," 

With much anticipation, the album was released and all that was left was your project. You logged into Instagram and quickly uploaded a clip of the first part.

The video was just a black screen, a bit of rustling before you spoke. "So, what inspires you?" There was more rustling and mindless piano playing before Gyungmo began talking.

"Inspiration comes from everywhere,"

The video was posted with the caption of a date, fans immediately excited and you logged back out of Instagram, going back to your task of cooking. You heard the ping of your phone and you finished chopping the vegetables before checking it.

Ian 12:31 PM: You tease Ian 12:31 PM: Of course you would post a black screen with just audio

You laughed at the text, hitting the call button and waiting as the call rang, placing it on speaker. Hearing Christian answer, a quick hello filling the kitchen.

“You busy?”

“For you? Never.” Christian leaned back into his chair, ignoring his task of editing his new project and focusing fully on you.

You began cooking the vegetables for the food, bringing the phone closer. “I need to talk to you about the upcoming part of the video, the last time we talked about it you were a bit of an-“

“Yeah I know,” Christian laughed, cutting you off. “I trust you, plus you made plenty of notes on what to hide and all that.” You smiled, butterflies appearing at how Christian remembered how you made notes for every piece of video you recorded.

“You sure? I can send it when I finish so you can look over it.”

“No, I trust you.”

The conversation continued as you cooked and Christian clicked around his computer. You pouted when he didn’t tell you about his project, dramatically sighing and complaining before laughing as Christian mocked you.

"Just know that it's something I haven't done in a real long time." Christian laughed at your groan, knowing you were never going to guess about him recording his own song.

“Hey, can I say something?" You set your plate down on the kitchen table, transferring the bit of leftovers to a bowl which you knew it was bound to get eaten when your friend arrived.

"Sure," Christian had picked up his task during the call, only clicking around, doing small things that didn't need his full attention. But he stopped working on his project, waiting for you as you continued. He heard the bit of shuffling on your end, knowing fully well that you were hesitating on saying something.

"I'm sorry, about everything. I'm sorry I treated you and Chaeyoung so bad, and I know that you're going to say that it wasn't my fault but I shouldn't have done that to her. She's a nice girl and I feel really bad. But it hurt really bad and I didn't know how to deal with that pain."

Christian was at a lost for words, his brain running a mile minute as he processed your words. He knew how nice you were, but it never occurred to him how you must have felt being so cold toward him and Chaeyoung. And yeah, it wasn't intentional, but still, he knew you must have felt so bad.

"Christian-"

"God I love you,"

It took Christian exactly six seconds to fully understand what had just happened. You were frozen in place, the confession being so sudden and almost uncalled for.

"Oh shit, shit, wait. Please I didn't- I mean I did but... fuck I'm so sorry-" With a click, the line was cut, and like that, Christian's panicked. He called you again and again, the line ringing until voicemail was hit. Finally, on the fifth call, there was no ringing, voicemail answered right away.

With desperation, Christian rushed out of his studio and into Scott's. With no sign of anyone, Christian rushed downstairs only to crash into Cline. "What are you doing?" Cline practically screamed as Christian began to pat him down. Cline tried backing away until Christian pinned him down, taking Cline's phone out of his pocket. 

"Unlock it! Hurry up!" Cline, now scared, took the phone back and unlocked it with shaky hands. Christian yanked the phone out of Cline's hands, searching up your name and calling you. 

The phone rang a few times before it stopped mid-ring. "Cline, can I call you back?"

"Please, listen to me-"

"Christian, just... I need to think,"

You were shocked, confused but definitely not expecting that. I mean, yeah, you expected that, but not this soon. You wanted time to think and time to build what you had with Christian. 

So there you stood, staring at the kitchen counter as Christian's words bouncing around in your head. When you snapped back, you looked at your phone, seeing missed calls from Christian. Your phone froze for a second when Cline's call came in, making you sigh. 

At the sound of Christian's voice though, your eyes widened. 

"Please, just..." Christian was lost for words, the silence on your end making his mind run fast with endless amounts of scenarios on how wrong this was all going. “I’m sorry, I know we’re starting over but-”

"Ian..." The sound of the name you called him made Christian stop talking, freezing to hear you say it again. "It's fine. It was sudden but... This is moving too fast. Just... let me breathe."

He spotted her at the after party and thought that maybe she knew one of organizers or the other artists because why else would she be here? He grabbed two drinks and the second he turned around, she’s gone. He sighed and thought maybe it’s not meant to be. He downed the two drinks he got and decided to go out for a smoke.

The bartender directed Dabin to the smoking area and he saw her out there. Maybe he still had some luck left for the day. He approached the smoking area, stood on the opposite side of the trash can and took out his pack of cigarettes. He didn’t want this to be his opening line, but after patting all his pockets, he just couldn’t find his lighter.

“Hey, do you have a light?” Dabin asked and the girl handed him her lighter. He flicked it but it sputtered out.

“Sorry I think I ran out. Here,” and she moved to stand beside Dabin, and used her own cigarette to light his.

“I think I’ve seen you in our shows more than once, or am I imagining things? I’m Dabin by the way,” he asked cautiously and he stretched out his hand.

“Y/N,” and she shook his hand. “No, you’re not,” she chuckled while shaking her head. “I was also at yesterday’s show, and the one two days ago. Although I don’t think I left that much of an impression for you to remember me in a crowd. All your shows are packed.”

“Well, you see someone in a crowd often enough, you start to remember them. Are you one of the organizers? I haven’t seen you at an after-party until tonight.”

“I’m with Jiho. I’m either sitting at the bar or out in the smoking area. Maybe we just didn’t cross paths until today.”

“Are you his stylist or something?”

“Wow, you really think I’m a stylist by the way I’m dressed?” she laughed. “I’m flattered, but no.” She hesitated to explain further. She just wanted to connect with someone else tonight.

“You’re dressed really well so you can’t really fault me for thinking you’re a stylist,” he complimented.

“Thanks,” she blushed.

She wanted to continue the conversation and she looked up as she tried to think of a topic and saw that the sky was clear tonight and that you could see some stars despite being in the city. She asked Dabin if he knew any constellations and when he said he didn’t, she started pointing out some to him. This led them to talk about their astrological signs and if they related to how their signs are usually described.

The backs of their hands brushed several times during that conversation, which made Dabin’s heart thump loudly. He really liked talking with her and thought he should ask her out before the night ended.

“Do you want to maybe get coffee tomorrow? The next show is in two days so we got free time,” Dabin asked.

She opened her mouth to respond when someone else arrived at the smoking area.

“There you are! I’ve been calling you ‘cause I couldn’t find you,” Jiho exclaimed.

Y/N pulled out her phone quickly to check. She felt her phone vibrating, she just deliberately ignored it. “Sorry I think I accidentally put it on silent.”

“Oh, I see you met Dabin. Hey man, this is my girlfriend, Y/N,” Jiho said as he draped his arm around her shoulders.

Dabin’s heart sank at Jiho’s statement and realized what she meant when she said she was with Jiho. He forced a smile and said, “How come I’ve never seen her?”

“Didn’t want you guys stealing her from me,” Jiho joked. “Anyway, we’re heading home now. See you at the next show!”

“It was nice talking with you Dabin.” She didn’t want to say goodbye but Jiho had his arm on her shoulders and she had to go.

Alone and with nothing to light another cigarette, Dabin headed back to the bar to find the boys. He spotted them and grabbed a chair to join their conversation.

“Was your girl in the crowd tonight?” Ian asked, eyebrows wiggling up and down.

“She was, but she’s not my girl,” Dabin said forlornly.

“What do you mean? You’ve been crushing on her the day you saw her,” Scott chimed.

“She was here at the bar and I found her and I was talking with her and the conversation was flowing and I asked her out for coffee but before she could reply, Jiho comes out to the smoking area and introduces her to me as his girlfriend,” he explained.

The boys’ eyes went huge. The news of Jiho having a girlfriend was just a big shock to them as it was to Dabin. Jiho could be pretty private sometimes but he and Dabin were close and he didn’t have any clue he was seeing someone.

Dabin continued, “I just… I felt a connection there. We maybe could’ve talked until dawn if only Jiho didn’t show up. When we parted, she held my eyes just a second too long, like she didn’t want to leave yet. He brought her to a party where she barely knows anyone and leaves her alone. She deserves to be treated better and I think I can do that.”

“Yo, chill. We barely know their relationship dynamics. You can’t judge them based on this one occasion. Maybe just befriend her for now and observe from the sidelines,” Cream reasoned.

They only had three shows left with Jiho before he’s replaced by Hyuk as their guest and Dabin had to make those count.

The smoking area became their unofficial rendezvous point after each show where they talked about nothing and everything in between. Dabin introduced her to the rest of DPR and to the organizers and other staff, something he thought Jiho should’ve done.

After the introductions, they hung out with the rest of DPR. They told her how DPR was formed and they asked her if she could tell them about her and Jiho but only if it was fine with her but she told them anyway. Jiho joined in after a while and he corroborated her stories, shocking them at how well they were able to hide the relationship.

Jiho’s last day of guesting meant that'll be the last time Dabin saw Y/N and he has been conflicted the entire morning and up until the before the show began if he should tell her his feelings or not.

He found her at their usual spot and he asked her if she wanted to go to the rooftop as the view was nice from there. She agreed and Dabin’s heart pounded louder and louder as they neared the rooftop and he kept on glancing at her to check if she could hear how loud his heart is beating but she just continued walking up the stairs.

They were both leaning on the railing admiring the nighttime view, and Dabin turned to her and stated, “Today’s your last night.” She just nodded in confirmation, still looking ahead.

Dabin swallowed before continuing, “I really enjoyed spending time with you and I know it might be wrong to say this now but I just don’t want to regret not ever telling you. I like you, Y/N.”

This caught her attention and she turned to Dabin. “Thank you Dabin but…” she sighed before continuing, “I know you know why I can’t reciprocate your feelings. I’m with Jiho and you two are friends and I don’t want to get in between your friendship.” She moved to hug Dabin, something he didn’t expect her to do. “Thanks for keeping me company after the shows and listening to me ramble on about the most random topics.”

Dabin laughed into her hair, his lips lightly brushed the crown of her head, and he just held on to her, savoring the moment.

“You never know, maybe we’ll have our time. But until then…” and Y/N broke from the hug and walked away, leaving Dabin alone on the rooftop.

Two years later, DPR is back on tour again and Dabin spotted her again in the crowd and he’s hit by deja vu. He thought he was hallucinating but he asked the others and they confirmed what he saw. He doesn’t have her number anymore so he couldn’t call her but he remembered where they used to meet after shows before and he went there to check.

The crowd has long dissipated and he could clearly see it was empty as he approached the smoking area. He figured he might as well smoke while he’s here, and he pats his pockets, lighter missing once again. He groaned in frustration when he suddenly heard a voice.

“Need a light?” a female voice asked.

Dabin turned to the voice and saw Y/N, arm outstretched, a lighter in her hand. Dabin immediately hugged her, completely ignoring the lighter she was offering. His heart ached at finally seeing her and the tiny seed of hope in his heart is ignited; maybe this is their time.

She hugged him back tightly, glad to be reconnected with an old friend. “I’m so happy to see you onstage again.”

“Wha-, how-,” Dabin flustered, breaking the hug. “I’ve so many questions right now. You fell off the grid and you’re here! Right now! In front of me!!”

Y/N laughed at his confusion, a sound Dabin didn’t know he missed. “I know. I’m sorry I left without any word. Jiho and I broke up almost a year ago now, and I thought it would be best for me to leave everything behind in order to move on. It just so happened that at the time of our break up, my work offered to send me to the US as part of my promotion and I took the opportunity. I kept tabs on you though. So when I saw your tour announcement, I waited to buy tickets. I bought a few in case we didn’t see each other at this venue.”

“We need to catch up. Are you hungry? There’s a diner down the block we can go to,” Dabin offered and she nodded.

The walk to the diner was filled with nervous energy as they both remembered how their last meeting ended. The two of them would ask a question at the same time and would urge the other to continue and nothing was asked nor answered as they arrived at the diner.

They chose a corner booth and ordered their food. Y/N told him about her breakup with Jiho, how they had a falling out as he prioritized his career. She also told him how she’s been adjusting to life in the US and living alone in a foreign country.

Dabin listened to her stories intently, wishing he was there as her friend during a difficult time in her life. The food arrived, which they both ignored, eager to catch up with one another.

It was his turn and he told her how he continued making music, collaborated with different brands, and despite all the work, he still wondered about her from time to time.

“What I said on the rooftop a few years back still holds true,” Dabin confessed.

Y/N smiled and reached for his hand across the table and squeezed it. Dabin interlaced their fingers when she loosened her grip.

He looked at her, hopeful. “Can I make you mine?”

“I told you we’ll have our time,” she affirms.

"But it's like he's rubbing it in my face," You turned to Gyungmo, hands now on your knees before you sighed, going back to staring at your laptop screen. "This video is almost half an hour long and I still haven't added any footage of him. And to top it, this whole part was about his process!"

Gyungmo sighed, biting his inner cheek, silent until you let your head fall. "So? Are you gonna cut this part out of the series?"

It was quiet, Gyungmo waiting for your response before you shook your head, giving out a sigh. You'll admit, you wanted to skip this part of the series but you knew you would get questions about why and the last thing you wanted was for fans to twist around your intensions. "No, I have to film him and see if he needs anything edited out."

With a nod, Gyungmo left you to continue his work. You hesitantly reached for your camera and laptop, holding on to the charger with your finger as you made your way to Christian's workspace. You stood outside the door, calming your nervous as you lifted your fist, about to knock when the door was pulled open, Christian looking down at you.

He was a bit startled, blinking and taking the tiniest of steps back before you immediately looked down. He watched as you fidgeted, almost dropping your laptop in the process of trying to find your words.

"I need to edit my video with you, just to see if it's okay with you and if you want-"

"I'm going on a date with Chaeyoung, can it wait?"

You gulped at the interruption, your voice already shaking with the nervous. The last thing you wanted was to make an even bigger fool out of yourself so you nodded. You simply stepped back, Christian moving past you and ignoring the way you bit your lip, heading in the opposite direction.

You locked yourself in Cline's space, taking deep breaths and calming yourself down. You slumped down on the arm of the couch, closing your eyes and breathing in and out. With a sigh and soft bite to the corner of your lip, you gulped down the rest of the feelings you had, fixing your laptop and charger in your hand before standing.

Scott looked down the halls, trying to find any sign of you before spotting you checking your phone, calling your name. You were a bit startled, Scott laughing as he walked over. "You hungry?"

You spent the afternoon in with Scott at a small restaurant, the two of you laughing and talking about anything Scott was working on. Eventually, the conversation turning into a game that Scott was interested in playing.

"I think my next series is going to be just playing that game, I've heard good things about it,"

"Are you seriously going to go back to gameplays?" Scott asked, excitement in his eyes as you laughed. The two of you eventually felt like you overstayed your lunch break, Scott letting you pay for the food after losing to a quick round of rock, paper, scissors.

When the two of you walked out, you looked up to find Christian and Chaeyoung walking across the street, hands tightly grasped. Chaeyoung giggling about whatever Christian whispered about, a smirk on his face. You ignored them, focusing on Scott who kept telling his story, your hand in the crook of his arm as the two of you decided to go on a stroll. You laughed a little at what Scott said, distracting you from Christian.

But Chaeyoung noticed you right away, smiling a bit and leaning her head on Christian's bicep. "Aren't they so cute? I feel like they were meant for each other,"

Christian looked over, quickly spotting how much you were laughing at Scott's hands tickling your sides. He clenched his teeth, Scott leaning all his weight on you as you attempted to hold him up, whining his name as he laughed, the two of you stumbling slightly.

You let Scott drag you back to him, continuing the walk. Christian hummed, turning back ahead and trying to ignore what he saw, letting out a breath. "She seems so nice... I kind of feel bad because I think she just doesn't like me," Chaeyoung let the conversation end there, focusing on Christian and their date. But Christian's jaw tensed, looking down at Chaeyoung.

"I'm sure you did nothing, she's just a little hard to get along with at first,"

Gyungmo and Scott had invited the guys on your last night to end your vacation with a celebration, hosting a house party in Scott's place. You knew it wasn't nice, but you couldn't help but feel happy that Christian and Chaeyoung didn't go. You wanted to enjoy yourself once more before heading home, and you knew you weren't going to be able to if you only saw them together.

You let yourself relax, enjoying the company of Hyuk who wouldn't let you go, making you shy whenever you were teased about it. Woo taught you how to spin a few records, teaching you the basics of how to DJ. You stayed with your camera glued to your hand, taking pictures and videos of everyone and everything.

The next morning, you sat on the hotel bed, showered and with everything packed save for your laptop case. You tried looking for the courage to send the text, looking down at your phone. You let out a breath, squeezing your eyes closed and pressing the send button.

Christian's attention was given to his phone at the ding it made, seeing a text from you and sighing a bit.

Y/N 12:54 PM: Can we edit the video now?

Christian knew he couldn't avoid you forever, so he replied back that he was in his studio and to go over. He sat back in his chair, hands rubbing his face as he knew he needed to face you sooner or later. But still, he couldn’t help the anger that bubbled up whenever he saw you, knowing you belonged to Scott.

Christian waited for half an hour, closing his laptop and just about to give up on you when you knocked, heading inside the studio.

"Hey,"

Christian looked up from his laptop, seeing you walk in with your own laptop on hand. You closed the door behind you, Christian, without a word, moved his things aside and giving you room to set your laptop down.

The tension was thick and you began to think that you took forever in setting your editing programs up, taking a seat and clearing your throat. "So, I'm going to combine the videos and play them, I'll tell you my plans and you tell me what you want me to get rid of."

With only a nod and a hum that Christian gave you, you opened the file only for Christian's part of the series, clicking into each video in the order you set it. You waited as he watched the first clip, biting your tongue gently.

Christian was clicking away in the video, eyes focused on his screen as you zoomed in a bit, giggling. He turned to you, giving you a confused look before breaking out into a smile.

"You don't need this one," Christian sat back into his chair, making you hum.

"This one is the intro, kind of to kick it off." You hesitated on looking at him, Christian rolling his eyes and shrugging, sighing out a quiet whatever. You looked back at the video, clicking out of it and moving it to a new file, continuing the second video.

"Delete that, I want my programs to be kept to myself," You nodded, adding in an edit, making sure to type it into the notes on your phone, continuing the video.

Your leg shook with nerves, eyes glued to the screen, going from video to video and doing everything that Christian told you to do with it. It was only a couple more videos when a knock on the door made you both turn, Chaeyoung poking her head before giving a shy smile. “Sorry, I’ll let you guys continue-“

“No, it’s fine.” Christian waved her in, pulling a chair right next to him. You squirmed in your seat, eyes going back to your screen and clicking through the video. You ignored the tiny giggle that escaped Chaeyoung and the soft kiss that Christian gave her until Christian gave you his attention again.

By the end, what could've been a 24-minute long video turned into only 5 minutes. You combined all the videos together, seeing the time limit and frowning, going through other files to look for any other videos you could add.

"That's it, right? We finished?" You could hear the impatience in Christian's voice, pulling his laptop closer. Chaeyoung helped him pull his items closer, going back to resting her arm on the table.

"No, the video needs to be longer than just five minutes," You ignored the way Christian grumbled, closing your eyes and continuing to look for more videos.

"Why don't you like Chaeyoung? What did she do to you?"

You were caught off guard with the question, fingers freezing as you looked at Christian. He glared at you, almost as if he wanted to bury you alive, hand gripping the mouse. Chaeyoung, who was once on her phone, turned to Christian so quick, you thought she was going to snap her neck.

Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion, letting your hands fall from your keyboard to your lap, shaking your head as you scoffed. “What?” 

With a sarcastic chuckle, Christian shook his head. “Everyone can tell that you don’t like Chaeyoung. So why? She’s been nothing but nice to you-“

“Who said that I didn’t like her? I never said that!” You argued back, turning fully toward him. 

“You make it so fucking obvious!” Christian raised his voice, hand waving as if he were showing you how obvious it was. “All that’s left is for you to openly tell her to fuck off-“ 

“Why the hell are you saying such shit?” You yelled back, glaring at Christian. “I’m sorry that I don’t want to talk to your girlfriend like she's my best friend! Is that what’s bugging you?” 

“Ian, stop...” Chaeyoung tried to stop Christian, looking at you with worried eyes. “I’m so sorry, please just ignore him.”

“Come on,” Christian laughed, shaking his head. “Y/N, you literally act like a bitch with her. You’re all fun and games with everyone and when she comes in the hate just oozes out of you!”

Your eyes widened, slamming your laptop closed and grabbing your things. Chaeyoung flinched at the slam, a quiet yelp leaving her and Christian only flinched a bit. “Have you ever thought that maybe it’s not her I hate, Christian?” You turned to the door, grabbing the doorknob. “Maybe, just maybe, it’s you that I hate?” 

Before you could even take a step out, the door was slammed closed, catching you off guard. You were spun around, backing yourself to the door as Christian's jaw clenched, eyes filled with anger as your hands pressed into his chest, attempting to prevent him from getting closer.

"You have no fucking reason to hate me," Christian's words came out quietly, each one oozing venom. Your eyes that were once wide in surprise turned into a hard glare, adding force to your push that only resulted in Christian moving only slightly back. "I never did anything to you.“

"Ian..." Chaeyoung hissed, worry evident on her face as she desperately tried to pull him away from you. "That's enough, okay? You don't need to do this-"

"Never did anything to me?" You scoffed, staring up at Christian in disbelief. "You treated me so nice the whole beginning, but one little drunken night that we kissed and you suddenly changed on me! And you got yourself a girlfriend making me think that I'm the problem!"

Chaeyoung finally stopped trying to pull Christian -who was frozen in shock- back, as Chaeyoung looked at you as if you had grown another head, shaking her head a bit. "Christian wouldn't do that..."

You looked at Christian, an eyebrow raised as you waited for him to talk. “You didn’t tell her? That I pulled you out to dance and you made me think there might have been something between us, only for you to make me feel like a cheap hookup?” 

Christian was at a loss for words, only staring at you as he finally stepped back enough, letting you rush out of the room. You stopped before closing the door, looking at Christian one more time. “I regret ever getting close to you,” The slam of the door echoed in the room, Chaeyoung letting out a breath and moving away. 

“I really thought you started to like me,” Chaeyoung’s voice was soft, pulling away from Christian to grab her phone. 

“I do-“ 

“No, you don’t,” Chaeyoung looked up at Christian. He faced her, worry on his face as Chaeyoung sighed. “Why did you even do this to her? To me?”

Christian tried to say something, anything to not hurt Chaeyoung. His mouth opened and closed as if he was choking on air, trying to find the right words before closing his eyes, letting out a breath. 

“She doesn’t like me, she was drunk and I thought maybe, just maybe, she liked me but she only liked Scott. She probably only kissed me to get back at him since he was with some other girl.” Christian moved to sit on his chair, burying his face in his hands. “I didn’t want to hurt you, and you’re so cool and I thought maybe I can forget her but-“

“You’re still into her,” Chaeyoung finished his sentence, Christian quiet. He clasped his hands in front of his face, only nodding. Chaeyoung looked down, silently walking out the studio. 

Christian stayed in silence, head spinning with thoughts of everything that has happened. He groaned, burying his face in his arms, wrapping his hands around his head, wanting to curl into a ball and hide for a while. 

You tried to calm down, huffing out in anger as you set your things down on a desk, your eyes closed as you finally let yourself breathe. "Everything okay?"

Scott smiled when he found you, walking over as you sat up on the desk, swinging your legs lightly. He stood next to your legs, watching your lips curve up into a small smile. "It's flight nerves, nothing too big,"

Scott stayed quiet, knowing you were lying but only responding with a smile, patting your thigh gently. You were quiet, your fingernails gently scratching Scott's head as his eyes closed a bit, enjoying the attention. You smiled a little, tilting your head a bit. "Sometimes when you spend time with me, I wish you were the one I fell for,"

Scott scoffed, laughing a bit as his eyes stayed closed, leaning more into you before resting his head on your arm. "We would be that famous couple that people would call us mom and dad,"

"Bold you to think they already don't," You giggled as Scott laughed quietly.

You both stayed silent a bit longer, Scott eventually pulling back and grabbing your things, silently giving you the hint that it was time to leave. "I'm sorry things didn't work with the guy you liked," Scott grabbed your hand, fingers intertwining as the two of you headed to your hotel.

"It's whatever, I'm just glad I never told him or else I would've died from embarrassment." You shook your head, letting out a sigh. "Guess I just thought he liked me too,"

"Well he's an idiot if he doesn't like you, you would've been an amazing girlfriend." Scott smiled at your laugh, staying quiet during the short walk. He held the door of the hotel open for you, following you to the elevators. 

“You know, lowkey you can give Gyungmo a chance.” 

The suggestion caught you off guard, making you look at Scott as the two of you stood in your spots, ignoring the elevator door as it opened. Scott only laughed a bit, pressing the button to keep the door open as he stepped inside. “I was just saying,” 

“Scott, what does that even mean?” 

You knew exactly what it meant, anyone hearing Scott would know what it meant. But still, you were caught off guard and now with this sudden news, you weren’t sure you were hearing things correctly. 

“I mean, Gyungmo has a thing for you. Or had... I’m not sure anymore.” Scott pressed the button again as the doors closed, reaching for your wrist to pull you inside. 

“He had a thing for me?” You ask, letting yourself get dragged into the elevator. 

“Okay don’t make this weird for him, I wasn’t supposed to tell you,” Scott watched as you simply nodded, blinking a bit but still processing everything he said, only looking up when the doors opened on your floor. 

“Is he still coming to drive me?” You asked, Scott now on his phone. 

“Yeah, he said to just give him a heads up.” 

You asked him to send Gyungmo the text, stepping inside your room and putting away the last bit of your things. Scott sat at the end of the bed, phone in hand as he scrolled through it, occasionally looking up to see if you needed any help. 

With a groaned sigh, you plopped on the bed next to Scott, resting your head on his shoulder. You two stayed quiet, looking at everything ready to be taken to the car, Scott occasionally chuckling a bit at something he would see on his phone. At the sound of a knock, you let Scott open the door and let in Gyungmo and Cline. You held on to Gyungmo's sleeve, letting him stay back as Cline and Scott left with a suitcase, the two talking. 

"Scott said something to me," You kept your eyes on Gyungmo as he furrowed his eyebrows, thinking on what Scott could've possibly said to you. "He said you have a thing for me?"

With a sigh and smile, Gyungmo shook his head, intertwining your fingers with his. "I had a thing for you, I mean, you're so cute in your videos and you're kind and a sweetheart in person. But I like you like this, being with me and gossiping about stupid shit," 

You couldn't help the smile on your face, getting shy and looking down a little. Gyungmo watched as you collected yourself, lightly slapping your cheeks to get rid of the blush that you knew was present before swinging your bag over your shoulder. Gyungmo stayed by your side, the two of you in comforting silence. "Thanks for being there for me all this time, I hope you know I'm going to be there for you if you ever need me,"

Everything was quiet until you made it outside, Scott and John laughing loudly as Cline was dancing weirdly. Gyungmo stood next to you, a smile on his face as he watched Cline before elbowing you lightly, motioning to your phone. You giggled as Cline exaggerated his dancing more, moving closer to you and the laughter got louder from all of them. Before Cline could exaggerate anymore, John gasped about the time and everyone scattered to put the luggage in Gyungmo's car, rushing you inside. 

The airport buzzed with people traveling in and out, the place almost a blur with everyone. You checked in with Scott by your side, making sure you had all your documents before you made your way to security. A soft sigh later, you let Scott pull you into a hug, wrapping your arms around him tightly. 

"Thank you for letting me do this, I promise you guys are going to love it," You pulled back to offer Scott a hug grin, getting one in return. 

"We better, or you're coming back to film everything all over again," Scott joked, making you giggle. 

You gave Cline and John a hug, looking over at Gyungmo and wrapping your arms around his neck. "Thanks for everything," You whispered, kissing his cheek softly as you pulled back. Gyungmo smiled, trying to hide his blushing. With one final wave, you fixed your bag, using your phone to record the guys once more before heading to your terminal. 

Christian tried not to make it obvious as he walked up and down the halls of the building, looking for any sign of you. It had been two days and after you blocked him on Instagram, Christian had no idea what you were up to. He hadn't seen you in so long, and he didn't want to ask Scott seeing that as every time he tried to get some info, Scott just told him to text you.

Christian didn't bother to knock, just swinging the door open of Scott's studio to find him too close for comfort with a girl that wasn't you. She had a smile on her face, eyebrow raised as Scott leaned closer, only a breath away from kissing her. But the sudden door opened caused the two to look at Christian, his eyes wide in shock. 

"Hey, what's up?" Scott turned to Christian who collected his thoughts before his blood boiled, teeth-gritting in anger. 

"Are you fucking serious?" Christian erupted, Scott and the girl both startled from the sudden outburst. "Just because y/n isn't here you get to cheat on her?"

"What?" The girl glared at Scott, starting to push him away. "Who the hell is y/n?"

"Wait! What? No, hold up!" Christian moved aside as the girl furiously left, Scott trying to call her back before giving up, glaring at Christian. "Dude, what the fuck! You know how long I've been trying to get her to agree to go on a date-"

"What about y/n?" Christian yelled back, pushing Scott back. 

"What about her? She's not even here!" Scott stumbled into the soundboard table, muttering a curse as his wrist got hit by the edge.

The outburst caught the attention of Gyungmo who rushed over, getting between both men. "What the hell is going on?"

"This asshole is practically fucking some girl in here just because y/n isn't here!" Christian tried to push Gyungmo away, trying to reach Scott but he moved farther away.

"What does she have anything to do with it?" Scott yelled back, gesturing around the room. "She's not here!"

"How the hell are you going to cheat on her like that!" 

Scott stopped himself, blinking a bit before thinking about what Christian had just said. "Cheat on y/n? I'm not dating her, man."

Christian stopped trying to get past Gyungmo, furrowing his eyebrows. "Did you break up with her?" 

"I wasn't dating her in the first place?" Scott grew even more confused, Gyungmo stepping away from Christian as he sat on a chair, sighing heavily. 

"You really never noticed that it was Rome that she liked?" Cline's voice made the three turn to him, being caught off guard. Gyungmo was just as surprised at Cline's comment, the three staring at him. "Wait-"

"Did you think I didn't know?" Cline interrupted Gyungmo, head tilted in curiosity. "It was pretty obvious, I mean, I thought he liked her too but I guess not since Chaeyoung is in the picture." With a shrug, Cline dropped the subject, making everyone look at each other. 

"Well, here I was thinking it was Hyuk..." Scott rubbed his cheek, pensive about everything that was said. "No wonder it didn't make sense." 

"Wait... What?" Christian still couldn't get the whole picture, shaking his head. "She likes me?" 

"She fucking fell in love with you, idiot." Gyungmo sighed, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his hands. "Only you would think she and Scott are dating."

"Man, Hyuk was a better suspicion than me. He was practically all over her, especially during her goodbye party. " Scott sat on the edge of his soundboard, shaking his head.

"Goodbye party?" Christian repeated, looking at Scott. 

"We texted you about it, we just thought you were being an asshole and didn't want to go," Cline spoke up, still standing right outside the room. "She went back home like two days ago," 

Christian groaned, rubbing his face and gripping his hair. "I fucked up..."

"You think?" Scott scoffed, rolling his eyes. But still, Scott watched as Christian beat himself over what happened. With a sigh, Scott stood up straight. "I can help you find her. So you can properly apologize for being such a fucking dick." Christian looked up at his friend, slightly nodding his head. With a glare and roll of his eyes, Scott pulled out his phone, going to an old video on your channel and showing it to Christian. "She always hangs around here. It's her favorite place."

"Hey, what brings you here?" Dabin asked, crouching to get Lori before walking over to the fridge, checking in and scrunching his nose when he couldn't find anything good to eat.

"I came over last night to play with Lori and I guess I ended up crashing on Ian's bed," You covered your mouth as you yawned, stretching your arms over your head. "Can I have a ride back to my hotel though? I want to shower and get everything ready for my vlog..."

"We're finally getting an update? Those IG comments have been asking for it like crazy." Scott teased you, making you roll your eyes and smile.

"Give me my phone, you idiot." You laughed, taking your phone back from Scott. You said your goodbyes with Dabin, Scott staying behind with Lori to wait for Christian.

"How was your night?" You asked once inside your room, Dabin immediately crawling on your bed and sighing as he gets comfortable, snuggling into the blanket.

"Wild, Scott said I wouldn't let some girl go until she distracted me at the bar with more drinks," He laughed a bit, small memories of it coming back.

You couldn't help the laugh that bubbled up, shaking your head. You took a seat on your chair, opening your laptop and connecting your phone to it. You waited a bit until everything synced, smiling at Dabin's snores when you began organizing the videos into the correct folders.

You began editing your vlog, going through each video and trimming them, adding filters when necessary and most importantly, making sure the video flowed smoothly. You reached the video at the small store with Christian, fixing your earbuds to listen to your laughter and the conversation.

You replayed the video twice, taking in a breath when you saw Christian's smile. You felt butterflies creep up, trying to ignore them as you went through other videos, reaching another video of the two of you.

You were in his studio, filming yourself with Christian in the background. Only half of your face showed, Christian mostly being the center of the video as he played on his phone. You cleared your throat, Christian looking up at you briefly before looking at the camera. You laughed and pulled away when he quickly moved toward, the two of you fighting for your camera until he took it, getting a closeup of you covering your face.

You looked through the videos from the party the night before, smiling at a few before getting to the video of you dancing with Hyuk. You laughed at the faces Hyuk made, trying to move his hips along with yours, laughing a bit when you twirled, moving closer. You added a small clip of it to the vlog, moving to the other of you and Christian.

You could hear Scott talking to someone, not even paying attention to what he was recording. But there you were, hands clinging to Christian, his hands dangerously low on your hips, eyes scanning the party as he whispered in your ear.

You shivered, remembering what he said and feeling the butterflies erupt in your stomach once again. It was then when Christian spun you, the two of you laughing that you leaned closer to your screen. You watched as you both teased each other, going in for the kiss. You pulled back at the kiss, definitely not remembering that as you went back a few seconds, re-watching it to make sure you weren't seeing things. The kiss lasted no more than two seconds until Scott moved forward, that you looked over at the camera. You let go of Christian's hand and hugged Scott, the camera pinning to the two of you.

You furrowed your eyebrows at the way Christian's face turned serious, ignoring the two of you and grabbing both glasses he set aside. You didn't want to jump to conclusions about what it could've meant, shaking your head.

"He's not jealous... no way..." You whispered to yourself, going back to editing the video. "We were just drunk, there's no way he could like me."

You sat back on your chair when you added the video with the rest, thinking about the feelings you had. You sighed, rubbing your temples to clear your head of any thoughts focusing on finishing the vlog.

You looked over at Dabin as he muttered something, waiting for him to settle down before he shifted a bit. You took your phone and started recording him, waiting for him to talk. You were about to stop the recording, giving up on hearing him talk again before he sat up, staring out the window.

"Dabin?" You asked, the phone still aimed at him before he fell back with a thump. You giggled after stopping the video, adding it into the vlog.

Once you double checked everything, making sure you didn't forget any links, details or videos, you began uploading it. You turned at the shuffling from your bed, Dabin awake and looking around.

"I'm bringing food," He announced, getting up. You smiled at him, watching him leave before turning back to your laptop, you began organizing the first video of the series. You were about to click the first video when one of Christian caught your eye, clicking on it. You had filmed him as he worked, making a note that you were going to speed the video up.

You silently watched the video until it ended, your eyes going to your phone. You pressed it to your ear, hearing the ringing as you made a call, wanting to confirm what you began feeling. You let out a breath when you heard an answer, gulping.

"Do you think it's possible to fall in love with someone solely because of the way they look in front of a camera?"

Christian walked into his home, laptop under one arm, both hands holding bags with a few groceries. He looked around, hearing Lori's collar as she ran from the living room to Christian. Christian gently pet her, walking to the living room to be met with not you, but Scott.

"Hey, where's y/n?"

Scott looked up from his phone, humming. "She went with Dabin to upload her vlog,"

Christian nodded, setting the groceries down on his counter. He picked up Lori, holding her as he took a seat on the couch, biting his lip. He wanted to be open with Scott, tell him exactly how he's feeling toward you and get all the facts straight.

"You okay?" Christian looked up at his friend, gulping a little before clearing his throat.

"I think I fell for someone..."

Scott's eyes widened, all his attention going to Christian. "Wait... it's not that girl that was obsessed with you, right?"

"What? No!" Christian shook his head, sighing. "It's another girl, it happened so quick that I don't know if she even likes me back,"

"She has to be special if you suddenly fell for her so quick-"

"I don't know man, she's just perfect in every aspect." Christian kept his head down, eyes looking at Lori who slept on his lap. "I mean, I know there have been other girls but her..." Christian looked up at his best friend, shaking his head, almost as if trying to find the words to describe her perfectly. "She's different like she's just filled with kindness it's almost unbelievable that she has not one mean bone in her body,"

Scott hummed, nodding along as he listened to Christian go on about this girl, finally sighing. "I say go for it, I mean, when are you going to meet another girl like that? If she's everything you want, get her."

Christian nodded, furrowing his eyebrows as he thought about what Scott said, agreeing with him. But the hesitation came in when Christian remembered one crucial thing, frowning. "There's another guy though..."

Scott tried to think of all the friends Christian had, trying to pinpoint who was against Christian in getting this girl. "He never said he likes her but they just vibe so good and they're always talking... it's just obvious."

Scott shook his head, fixing his posture in his chair. "I say you either tell her how you feel or get a new girl because if she likes the other guy, it's over for you." Christian didn't answer, only thinking about what Scott said. "Plus if your friend never said that he likes her, maybe they just click? I'd go for it and snatch this girl from right under him before he could do anything about it."

Christian nodded, staying in his spot for a bit longer before he picked Lori up, shushing her soft bark as he went to lay her on his bed. Scott took his phone out when it vibrated answering your call, smiling as he stood up and walked toward the kitchen, looking through Christian's fridge. "What's up?"

"Do you think it's possible to fall in love with someone solely because of the way they look in front of a camera?"

Scott hummed, thinking about what you said. "I guess? Why?"

You sighed, throwing yourself back on your hotel bed, groaning. "I think I fell in love with someone..."

Scott never thought about putting two situations in the same category, never thinking that in fact, you were the one who Christian was talking about. He never even said your name and how was Scott supposed to know? Plus, you were filming so many people a day, the gang, their friends, who would've known it was Christian that you fell in love with?

"Go for it!" Scott egged you on, making you sit up on your bed.

"You think so?" You asked, biting your knuckle, unsure.

"Go for it! Anyone would be lucky to date you, and what do you have to lose?"

Christian walked to the kitchen, eyes landing on Scott as he grinned at the call, looking up at Christian who gave Scott a curious look. Scott covering the phone, whispering your name as you spoke to him, unsure if you should.

"Do I have to repeat it?" Scott laughed a bit at your whine. "Hell, I would be happy to date you,"

Christian stared at Scott as he moved to go to the back balcony, stepping out and having some privacy with you. Christian gulped down the anger, glaring at Scott's back, holding in the urge to punch his best friend.

"Hey, I'm going down to the studio to get some last-minute productions in, you coming?" Scott walked back inside, pocketing his phone, his movements slow as he watched Christian. He stood with hands clenched, jaw tense and looking like he was ready to start a fight. "What's up?"

Christian shook his head, walking away annoyed and beyond furious. Scott left without another word, slightly worried but leaving Christian alone to cool off.

Dabin returned to your room with food, the two of you eating and talking when Dabin's phone rang. You waited as he talked, hanging up before finished his food. "Scott is going to the studio to just finish up last minute. Consider this your day off," You smiled at Dabin, finishing your food before standing.

"Can you give me a ride to Ian's place?"

You had made up your mind, you were going to tell Christian that you liked him, knowing it was too soon to tell him how you fell for him, but he had to at least return your feelings with what happened last night. You fidgeted with your fingers, Dabin noticing but stayed silent, knowing that you and Christian had a thing for each other.

You thanked Dabin as you got off, rushing up the steps and knocking, hearing Lori barking. You smiled, bending down to hear her better. The opening of the door made you stand, giving Christian a bright smile.

"Hey, sorry for leaving earlier-"

"What do you want?" Christian leaned on the threshold, blocking Lori's path to get to you, ignoring her barking.

You blinked at the harsh tone, suddenly losing your train of thought. "I just wanted to apologize... maybe see if you wanted to hang out-"

"I'm busy today, I'm expecting someone." You took in how careless Christian looked, not to mention how angry he seemed.

"Ian... did I do something to upset you?" You whispered, Christian, staying quiet. "I'm sorry if I did, I probably didn't mean it..." You quickly tried to think before a car pulling up made you turn. Your eyes widened as a girl got out, hair long and falling down her back. She was tall, flipping her hair back as she hung her designer bag over her shoulder.

You turned back to Christian who watched you. "If this is about last night I'm sorry, I didn't know-"

"Hey," The girl's voice made you immediately look down, hands shaking.

"Did you need anything else, y/n?" Christian asked, watching as you just shook your head, leaving without another word.

You tried to keep it together, trying to not freak out in front of Christian as you rushed away. The moment you rounded the corner, you let out a breath, chest tightening as you wheezed for air, hands shaking. You tried holding your phone, calling Scott but not getting an answer before calling Gyungmo. You tried to breathe, eyes closed as his voice rang in your ears.

"I'm by Ian's... please come pick me up," You wheezed, Gyungmo immediately rushing out of his studio, staying on the phone with you as he drove to you. The car skidded to a stop, Gyungmo rushing to you and helping you breathe.

"What happened?" Gyungmo turned to you once you sat in the car.

"I didn't know Ian had a girlfriend! How was I supposed to know? With the way were last night, of course, I wouldn't have known! And with the kiss-"

"Okay, calm down, what are you talking about?" Gyungmo reached over to wrap an arm around you, shushing you as you cried.

"It was my fault, I thought this was double-sided and I guess with last night I just let my feelings get the best of me-"

"Hold on, you kissed Christian?" Gyungmo interrupted you, finally getting that.

"He has a girlfriend!" You cried, burying your face in your hands.

"No, he doesn't, Rome isn't dating anyone,"

You sniffled, lifting your face to process what Gyungmo said. Gyungmo watched as you faced him, pointing at yourself. "So... I'm the problem?" You whispered, sitting back on the seat.

"I don't think you are-"

"Can you drop me off at my hotel?" You asked, drying your eyes. Gyungmo nodded silently, turning back to the wheel and driving you back to the hotel.

"Thank you," You gave Gyungmo a small smile, unbuckling yourself.

"Call me if you need anything, even if it's stupid, okay?" Gyungmo returned your smile, making sure you went inside your hotel fine before driving off.

You closed your room door behind you, leaning on the door as you stared at the floor, sliding down until you curled into yourself, hiding your face to freely cry.

You didn't show up the following day to record the guys, instead, staying in and fixing up the second half of the series. You watched through videos, editing them as you stayed seated in your chair. The sound of a text coming in made you sigh, reading it.

Scott 3:27 PM: We're going to get food, wanna come by?

You stared at the text, wondering if you should or shouldn't, before replying back, asking for the address of the place. You pocketed your phone and simply pulling on a hoodie and your running shoes, leaving once getting the address.

You walked into the semi-busy restaurant, right away spotting Scott who waved you over. You walked over, your steps slowing as you noticed Christian sitting with the girl from the previous day. She sat eating, leaning into Christian as his arm was around her shoulders, only briefly looking up at you.

Scott moved over, letting you slide in next to him as he offered his plate, making you shake your head as you reached for the menu Gyungmo offered. You looked through in, occasionally sneaking glances at Christian, looking away when he shifted, too afraid that he might notice.

Cline had spoken up, talking about whatever the conversation was before you joined in before you looked over at Christian. You watched as the girl looked up at him, his lips moving as he lowly said something to her. She smiled, only leaning up a bit to press her lips to his jaw. You set your menu down, rather roughly which made the table quiet, all of them looking at you.

"I'm sorry... I forgot... I had... I’m sorry," You ignored Scott's attempt to hold your arm, ignoring Scott's question on if you were fine. Christian looked up as you rushed out of the place, only passing by as you bit your lip, trying your best to hold in the tears.

“Binnie, I need your advice on something.” I turn to him while helping set up the venue. Christian went to get some more supplies so we could finish decorating. “Okay.” He says whilst putting final touches on the banner. 

“I have a friend that asked for some help with telling her boyfriend something and I’m not sure how she could let alone if she should tell him.”

“Okay 1) I’m not stupid, you’re my sister. I know you’re talking yourself. 2) How bad could it be?”

I’m silent for a good minute after he said that and he’s figured its bad, like eating me alive bad.

“What happened?” He is truly concerned.

“I went to have some drinks and catch up with an old friend and I made the worst decision possible. I know I’ve made plenty of horrible decisions in my life but—.”

“I fucked up.” There are tears in my eyes threatening to fall. “I really fucked up, Bin.” I broke down right then. “ I cheated. I don’t know how I’m supposed to tell Ian. How could I do this to him.”

“Who?” I was startled by the voice at the door. 

“Chr-” I start but am cut off.

“Who was it?”

“Mark.” 

“Hah, I knew it, I fucking knew it. You’ve been acting funny since you started hanging out with him again.” He says as he throws the bag he was holding on the table.