#dpec

This watch has changed my life: I can monitor everything in real time – my health, my sleep, my diet… and take complete control of my life. Take this, for example: all I need to do is take another 3,045 steps, eat 239g of bananas and 2.05 egg yolks before going to bed at 9.39 pm to be in peak condition. You can’t imagine the sense of freedom it gives me!

So cute, yesterday I took some shoes to the cobbler and he, looking embarrassed, told me there would be a slight delay, that they wouldn't be ready for another two weeks, and asked me if that would be okay.

Mate, I've got 247 pairs to get me by, it'll be fine.

I must warn you, Bernadette; even though I can guess what you’re thinking, I’m not sure I’ll live up to the image you’ve formed of me

We’ve just sold our client a report on the meaning of work: 10 years ago, it would have taken me five junior staff members two months to complete, but this time I put four AI agents on the job, which allowed me to knock it out in under 48 hours... All my client had to do was have it proofread by his AI agent, who confirmed that it was in line with the brief: he was delighted!!

Find me a study on the disastrous carbon footprint of data centers, and I’ll have everyone back in the office in a flash! I’ve had enough of Zoom meetings with Josiane on the living room sofa and Kevin behind the wheel of his Golf GTI!

And of course, you’ll have to put that down to the CSR budget!

Noli me tangere

Well, well... Tugdual had just refused to give Baudouin his babysitter’s contact details, because... “if everyone makes her work, she won’t be available when I need her”... Perhaps without realising it, Tugdual had just given him the best possible definition of the bourgeois mindset: the belief that anything given away is lost!