The group of friends had decided to make today’s grand adventure a Dungeons & Dragons style game. Pomni chose the wizard class, reflecting her recent transition into the magical digital world. Caine had chosen the bard class on account of his performative nature. Kinger had chosen the cleric class because of his desire to help others. Ragatha and Zooble had become a barbarian and fighter respectively because of their repressed desires to lash out. And Gangle… she took the opportunity to become the Big Bad for once. She felt conflicted at first, but upon learning that the role was nothing more than harmless fun, she happily accepted. So she wouldn’t have to miss out on most of the adventure, she took the role of the evil mastermind behind the whole scheme… the Puppet Master, if you will. After going on a high-stakes adventure with Gangle pulling the strings the whole time, the team had finally reached the heart of the labyrinth where they finally met their antagonist face-to-face… and they did not expect her to be so monstrously large! The party was suspended on a stone platform that had lifted them up into the air, the catalyst for the boss fight. Around them seeped an eerie purple fog that the Puppet Master had used to add aesthetic to her grand reveal. She whisked her enormous tendrils all throughout the mist to draw fear from her opponents. The party murmured quietly at the spectacle until the Puppet Master emerged from the eerie purple mist, cackling so loud that she nearly scared the party of heroes out of their skins. Kinger nearly fell backwards off the platform before being caught by Zooble.

“Gangle?!” Kinger practically squawked looking up at her. The other looked up at her with the same near-terrified expression.

“I am no longer the one you have known as Gangle.” She declared. “I am now The Puppet Master! Gangle as you know her is gone forever!” She laughed.

“Babe…” Zooble said, looking directly up at her. The entity formerly known as Gangle squeaked and recoiled.

“… What!?” She demanded, obviously flustered.

“Nothing.” Zooble replied in a nonchalant manner. Ragatha couldn’t help but laugh at this encounter.

“Oh, you think that’s funny?” She asked Ragatha, staring her down.

“Yes…” she admitted, smiling and not even trying to hide it. This made Pomni chuckle, too. This caused a chain reaction where Caine clamped down his jaws like a clam trying not to smile, as Kinger also did by averting his eyes. This didn’t help, if not made it worse since their reactions were painfully obvious. Zooble looked up with a knowing smile in her eyes, not even trying to hide it.

“Oh, I’ll show you!” Gangle declared. That was the only thing she said before grabbing them all with her writhing tendrils one by one. They all clung to their equipment as they were lifted off the ground and they were suspended in midair being held safe only by the monster’s grasp. “I’ll show you funny…” Gangle said with a sinister smile. “Just like I have with all my useless underlings who have failed me!” The party of heroes had no idea what she meant by this… until she began to tickle them all silly. The only exception was Zooble, who isn’t ticklish being made out of interchangeable parts, and was wearing protective armor on top of that. The rest of them were caught completely unawares as they began to laugh involuntarily at the surprising sensation, with its unexpectedness seemingly making it even worse. On top of that, the unexpected tickling had made them, excluding Zooble, drop their equipment into a bottomless pit. They had no idea Gangle had this in her! As of now, it was pretty obvious that she did, tickling her poor friends into a state where they couldn’t even think. She focused mostly on one person at a time, savoring their individual reactions. She loved how she could make Pomni squeal, Ragatha cackle, Kinger plead, and Caine writhe. And boy, did they. Zooble looked around at this predicament.

“OHMYGAHAHAHAD!!” Pomni screeched at a tone that shouldn’t be possible as she kicked her legs. Ragatha gasped in a way that sounded like a creaking door.

“I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS-!” She near-breathlessly begged, not meaning what she said at all. Still, Gangle eased in her quickly so she could breathe. Kinger’s frantic laughing sounded akin to a goose being strangled. He tried to make a coherent sentence begging Gangle to stop, but he couldn’t. She eased up on him, too. And Caine had a laugh that was genuine, hearty, and loud, just like his showman persona. Gangle lifted Zooble up to her eye level.

“I’ll tickle you later.” She told them with desire in her large eyes.

“Oh-” Zooble was caught off guard. “You flirt.”

“Get a room!” Caine complained.

“Later.” Gangle insisted. This made Caine freeze up. Buffer, if you will. Ragatha laughed at the absurdity of this situation.

“You walked right into that one.” Pomni told him, just before being subjected to another tickle attack. Zooble looked up at their enormous tickle monster of a girlfriend.

“Babe, I don’t think they can do anything like this.”

“That’s the idea!” She playfully retorted. Zooble rolled their eyes like a moody teenager. Gangle then proceeded to grab Zooble’s club and shield and fling them into the abyss in a cheerful manner.

“Hey!” Zooble complained. The Puppet Master smiled innocently. As if to prove Zooble’s point, the party of heroes tried to take action against their captor. Pomni tried to recite a spell from memory, not having a spell book or staff to guide her.

“Arcane spirits, summon- uhh..” Pomni tried to think, but the Puppet Master quickly put a stop to it as she targeted Pomni with her terrible tendrils.

“Oh no you don’t!” She declared as she made Pomni squeal and laugh like a little girl. While the Puppet Master was distracted, Kinger attempted to summon the aid of his holy magic. He had his incantations memorized, but it did little to help him once he was spotted.

“Divine God, I call upon you.” He chanted. “Bless me with your holy power…” his head began to glow, which was an enormous target of attention for the looming Puppet Master. She wasted no time attempting to subdue the use of this holy magic. Although Kinger was more resilient than she had anticipated. As her horribly soft ribbons relentlessly stroked against his body, he did his best to maintain composure. “Aid me in… my mission to… deliver…” he strained. His body was shaking like a leaf as he tried and failed to maintain steady breaths. The party wondered how much more he could stand. The Puppet Master decided to play dirty and sent a whole slew of tickling tendrils onto him, which broke him instantly. He made funny sounds, cackling and wheezing in utter hysterics. With him neutralized, she stopped tickling her dear father figure so he could breathe again. Then, she turned her attention towards Ragatha, who was a fighter with no experience with magical spells.

“I got nothin’.” She admitted. The Puppet Master proceeded to tickle her anyways.

This is when the party realized that this wasn’t going to work. If they were going to be able to do anything at all, they would have to escape the monster’s grasp. It didn’t seem like the Puppet Master had any intention of letting them go any time soon. While Caine was hanging upside down, he had an idea.

“Hey you!” He demanded. She looked over at him, as did all the other party members. “I have an offer to make you.” He pointed dramatically at the Puppet Master, still hanging upside down and looking ridiculous. She tilted her head, intrigued. “Let them go!” The Puppet Master laughed.

“Or what?” She taunted. With her looming figure intimidating him, Caine mustered up the courage to say what he needed to.

“If you let them go… I’ll let you do whatever you want to me.” Everyone looked at him in awe. He proceeded to break character, further appealing to Gangle as opposed to her villainous persona for today’s adventure. “…I’ve tormented you for the last… I don’t even know how long it’s been. This is the least I can do.”

“Caine!” Ragatha cried out in concern.

“Relax.” Gangle assured her. “I’m not gonna hurt him.” His virtual heart eased when she said this, but started pounding again when she used her tendrils to hold his arms and legs in place. She stretched him out to expose his vulnerable body to an attack that wouldn’t be painful… but would damned well be almost unbearable. His eyes widened in mortal terror. The Puppet Master giggled mischievously as the purple mist closed in. “…Here comes the tickle monster!” She announced. Caine clamped his jaw shut in fear and whined.

“Oh, that is just mean.” Zooble commented. That’s when she closed in on her hysterically ticklish prey. Gangle used her feather soft ribbons to stroke gently against Caine’s body and also hold him taut to give her easy access and to stop him from protecting his poor tickle spots. He tried to resist the overwhelming feeling, just to deny his tickler the satisfaction of the hunt. He didn’t realize that if he had successfully resisted, the Puppet Master would have simply turned her attention back towards the rest of the party of heroes, but of course, Caine couldn’t think. And it didn’t even matter because just like Kinger, he strained for a total of a handful of seconds before losing himself to tickling induced hysteria… which only made the experience all the more satisfying for the one he had made the deal with. Gangle’s genuine happy smile showed that she seemed to be having the time of her life right now. To make this even more fun, she proceeded to tease Caine as if he were a little baby.

were a little baby.

“Tickle tickle tickle tickle…”

Zooble looked up at the ridiculous scene. Even in the form of a dragon, their girlfriend was so damn cute. They couldn’t help but smile at the wholesome chaos.

“You got this, Caine!” Ragatha cheered.

“DO SOMETHI- AAAHAHAHAHAHOHO!” He tried to yell at his friends, but he was cut off by his own laughter so he couldn’t be taken seriously.

“Oh!” Kinger realized what he was supposed to be doing. He tried to think over all the noise.

“What are we even supposed to do in this situation?” Zooble asked.

“I have no idea.” Ragatha responded. “I don’t think I would be much help, so I’ll stay here and give Caine moral support.” She sat down Indian style like a kindergartner watching Caine get tickled silly like it was a movie.

“Thanks.” Zooble said, flatly.

“Hmm, let me think…” Kinger pondered aloud. He tried to ignore all of the manic chaos, which he did a surprisingly good job at. Must be a dad thing. 

“I might as well try to figure out something, but I don’t think I’ll be much help either.” Pomni added. Zooble had no idea what to do, so they just stood there, completely burnt out.

“You’re doing great!” Ragatha affirmed, sticking up her thumbs.

“Why thank you.” Gangle said, intentionally accepting a compliment that wasn’t meant for her. Ragatha giggled like a little girl.

“I wasn’t talking to you, I was talking to Caine.”

“You’re not helping…” he said, completely exasperated.

“You don’t think I’m doing a good job?” Gangle teased.

Oh no. Caine’s eyes widened in fear.

“WAIT-” he protested.

“I know!” Kinger perked up. He raised his finger cartoonishly.

The Puppet Master laughed evilly.

“Watch this…” she demonstrated.

“Gangle’s spell can be cured by tr-”

Kinger’s statement was drowned out by a scream. He turned his head to see giant Gangle gingerly stroking one of her ribbons against the bottom of Caine’s shoes. If he wasn’t laughing in hysterics before, he most certainly was now. Being an AI, Caine was taught most everything he knew off of training data. His training data consisted largely of cartoons, which inevitably portrayed feet as the worst, best tickle spots there are. Especially against feathers, which Gangle’s ribbons were just about as soft as. The AI must have  subconsciously implemented this data into his own body… and this was the result. “…By true love’s kiss!” He had to shout just to be heard over Caine’s howling. Kinger, Pomni, and Ragatha both looked at Zooble, who blushed and thought this was absolutely ridiculous.

“Now?” They asked.

“It’s the only way…” Kinger insisted, wiggling his fingers for dramatic effect.

“Ugh. Fine.”

Meanwhile, Caine was being pushed to his limit. The poor man had become delirious as a result of the unbearably intense tickling. He frantically begged for it to stop, seeming genuinely distressed. Gangle noted his change of tone and checked on him immediately.

“Caine! Are you okay?!” She asked him. All he could do was try to regain his breath. “Oh Caine, I’m so sorry!” She wailed. “Come here…” she said as she wrapped him up in a tender hug with her many gentle ribbons. She looked down on him like he was a baby bird. “I didn’t mean to hurt you…” Gangle was on the verge of tears. In response, Caine giggled softly.

“You didn’t hurt me…” he assured her. Upon closer inspection, he was still smiling! “I… I needed that…” he quietly admitted.

“I’m just glad you’re okay!” Gangle told him, wrapping him up in a tight hug. Caine was being squeezed a little hard… but he liked it. It made him feel loved. “I’m gonna put you down now.” She proceeded to gently place her friend back on the platform with the others.

“Are you all right?” Kinger asked. He was visibly concerned. 

“That looked pretty bad.” Pomni added.

“I’m fine…” Caine wearily told them as he laid on the stone. “Besides, I probably deserved that.”

“You took it like a champ!” Ragatha complimented. Caine just eyed her down. Gangle, completely devoid of her Puppet Master persona now, listened in on the conversation curiously. Zooble, seeing her giant, looming, yet adorable face looking down on them, decided to carry out the plan. They looked her in the eyes and beckoned her towards them with her finger.

“Zooble!” She complained with a shy smile.

“You wanna hang out with me later? You gotta earn it.” They told her.

“Why?” Gangle pouted.

“Just look what you did to Caine.” They gestured to him still sprawled out on the floor, drained of energy. Gangle smiled bashfully.

“Sorry…” she said. “I got carried away. That’s what being under his complete control for years and years did to me… and he just so happens to be too ticklish for his own good!”

“They know.” Caine dryly said as he crossed his arms. The group all giggled collectively.

“What say you give me a kiss and we put all this mess behind us?” Zooble offered. Gangle, in her giant, looming figure, was taken aback and very bashful.

“Now? Here?” She asked. She would rather spend a tender moment more privately.

“I know you want me.” Zooble teased. The group laughed softly. Giant Gangle pressed her tendrils against her face.

“Fine-uh!” She replied. The group laughed louder. “Let’s just get this over with.” She picked Zooble up gently off the floor and pulled them close. She wrapped her ribbons around her sweetheart and gave her a loving little peck. That’s when her body began to glow. “What’s going on?!” She asked. Zooble laughed silently. Gangle’s body then began to shrink rapidly. Before she could process what was going on, she and Zooble realized that they were still suspended in midair. They fell down and screamed, clinging onto each other. Thankfully, they were caught safely by all of their friends. Gangle looked at Zooble, who was holding her bridal style. “You tricked me!”

“Yeah, and you fell for it.” They told her. Gangle didn’t know how to respond to this, so she got all huffy and crossed her ribbon arms. Zooble looked at her adoringly. “You’re adorable, you know that?”

“Hmph…” Gangle looked away from her lover, trying to be grumpy. But when Zooble pulled her back in for another kiss, she melted into it. Pomni and Ragatha cheered for the happy ending. Kinger smiled happily.

“Get a room…” Caine whined.

“Oh we will, once we get home.” Zooble assured him. Pomni laughed.

“You fell for it again!” Ragatha teased. Caine crossed his arms and shut his jaw over his eyes.

“Uhh…” Pomni droned. “Now what do we do?” On command, the stone platform they were all standing on lowered itself. It descended back into the dungeon where The Puppet Master’s slew of prisoners were being held captive: the Gloink Queen and her many children, Gummigoo and his brothers, Princess Loolialu, The Fudge, the residents and monster of Mildenhall Manor, the evil Big Tops, and dozens of blank mannequins. Before, they had all been tied up with ribbons, but they must have vanished when the curse was broken. They all cheered when the party of heroes returned.

“Thanks to your brave heroism, all the land is free from the clutches of the Puppet Master.” The princess congratulated.

“Did she tickle you too?” Gumigoo’s youngest brother asked.

“Oh yeah. Bad.” Pomni told him. Gangle, still being held by her true love, smiled shyly.

“How are we supposed to get everyone out of here?” Zooble asked. On cue, a stone door opened up in the wall revealing a staircase to the surface.

“Oh.” Kinger commented in his high pitched voice. The prisoners cheered again.

“Who wants Spudsy’s?” The Gloink Queen asked her many children, making them go wild. Without wasting another moment, everybody made their way up the stone stairs to freedom.

Back at the circus tent, the characters reflected on today’s grand adventure. Each of them stated what their favorite part was. Gangle loved the whole adventure so much that she couldn’t decide.

“I want to do that again!” She happily said.

“No…” Caine complained. The whole group busted out laughing.

“You used to be the god of this entire reality and you can’t even handle being tickled? Were you always like this?” Zooble teased.

“Yeah, were you?” Pomni playfully added.

“I don’t remember programming that into him…” Kinger pondered. “He must have got it from his training data.” Caine crossed his arms and pouted as his ticklishness was analyzed like an academic subject.

“What was his training data anyways?” Ragatha asked.

“Mostly cartoons.” Kinger told her. Then, Gangle looked at her darling.

“What about that tickle I promised you earlier?” She asked, promiscuously.

“If that’s what you want.” They responded in a rather lustful manner.

♟️♟️♟️

It was one of those lazy evenings. Even after going on an adventure today, Pomni still felt blah. Drained, even. Had her period followed her into the digital world? Kinger was the first one to notice since getting back home.

“You all right, Pomni?” He asked her. The rest of the gang always knows how to ask their friends if they’re not feeling well, but Kinger had always done an exceptional job at it.

“I’m just tired.” She responded flatly.

“Long day?” He asked.

“Mhm.” That was all she said and all she needed to say. Kinger paused in a moment of silence.

“Would you like to come into my pillow fort? It’s nice and cozy in there.” Kinger asked. His voice was gentle as ever. Pomni smiled at this request.

“Mkay.” So, Kinger kindly guided Pomni over to his self-proclaimed ‘impenetrable fortress’ and invited her in.

“Ladies first.” He said with a polite bow. Pomni was starting to feel better already.

Once inside, Pomni snuggled up with a pillow, hugging it like… well, a pillow. She was exhausted and cozy. Kinger sat next to her, sitting on another pillow and hugging his legs gently.

“You’re so nice, Kinger. You know that?” Pomni sleepily said.

“I’ve been told that.” Kinger admitted. “Are you sure there’s nothing you would like to talk about?”

“Egh…” Pomni replied. “I don’t know how to explain. I’m not sad, I’m just… beh. Kinger knew that people could get like this in this world, even if he didn’t specifically program that into the system a long, long time ago. It was more of a side effect than anything. That didn’t change the fact that his friend didn’t feel so good right now.

“I know someone who can cheer you up.” Kinger said softly. Pomni looked up at him.

“Who’s that?” She asked. Kinger smiled with his eyes.

“Mr. Tickle Spider.” He said, innocently as he gently wiggled his fingers on one hand. Pomni knew that Kinger was a father figure to everyone in the circus, but this was pretty ridiculous. She smiled at the absurdity of the suggestion.

“Kinger, I’m not five years old.” She laughed. “If I was, I wouldn’t even be here.”

“Come on…” Kinger playfully insisted. He began to pull Pomni over towards him. This made her complain and giggle all the same. “Mr. Tickle Spider doesn’t care how old you are, he just wants to cheer you up!”

“Nohohoho!” Pomni protested, smiling genuinely. Just then did Mr. Tickle Spider make his attack. The tickling wasn’t too intense, Kinger made sure not to dig into her body with force. Instead, he tenderly tickled Pomni as if she were his own daughter. She laughed and squirmed around like a happy child. “Kihingher!” That was the only thing she could get out of her mouth besides bubbly laughter. Even without a mouth, Kinger just couldn’t stop smiling.

“See? Mr. Tickle Spider likes you!” He happily said. “Mr. Tickle Spider likes everyone, he’s very friendly.” Pomni didn’t know how to handle verbal teasing, so she countered it the only way she knew how.

“Shuhuhut uhuhup!” She told him through her laughter. Kinger froze.

“Did you just tell me to shut up?” Kinger asked. He wasn’t really offended at all, but he did find it a good excuse to pretend that he was.

“Uh…” Pomni looked up at him. There was only one way this could go now. Dammit.

“Why, I think you need to be taught some manners, young lady!”

“Nohohoho!” She insisted, kicking her legs. Now she knew full well that it would do absolutely nothing to stop Kinger’s playful wrath. In fact, she realized it would just make it worse, but it was too late now. He tightened his grip on Pomni in his lap.

“Hmm… I think Mr. Tickle Spider wants to burrow under your arm.” 

“NOOO!” Pomni squealed like a little kid. Kinger ignored her plea.

“I’m gonna help Mr. Tickle Spider.” He said mischievously as he lifted her arm up to make way for the imaginary spider. “Here he comes!” Kinger teased. He dug his fingers into Pomni’s awfully ticklish armpit as Kinger held it exposed and she nearly screamed with laughter. He let go of her arm, which clamped down on top of Kinger’s terrible tickling hand. “Spiders like to hide in dark places. It makes them feel safe.” He explained. He had to raise his voice just to be heard over Pomni’s cackling. All this noise inevitably drew in a visitor.

“Is everything okay in here?” Ragatha asked with a smile as she peeked into the pillow fort.

“Ragatha, hehehelp mehehehe!” She begged. Kinger happily continued tickling her. Ragatha knew this game all too well. She had been subjected to it in the past when she was feeling blue. She decided to have some fun and join in.

“Is there a spider in here?” She asked with a knowing smile. Pomni gasped for air, which Kinger took as a sign to stop. He removed his hand from under her arm and repositioned it around her chest in a gentle hug.

“Why, yes.” Kinger replied with a mischievous smile. “Pomni wasn’t feeling so well, so I introduced her to an old friend of mine.”

“Eeugh…” That was the only thing a now even more exhausted Pomni could manage. Kinger had tuckered her out, but he had indeed made her feel better. Ragatha looked at her friend and decided to help her out.

“Did you hear the news, Kinger?” Ragatha asked.

“News? What news?” He replied, genuinely curious. Pomni looked up at her as well.

“Did you know…” Ragatha said with a mischievous smile of her very own, “That Mr. Tickle Spider had babies?” She wiggled her fingers at him with a large, toothy grin. Kinger widened his eyes in realization just shy of dread. “And they want to meet you!” She playfully added. He let his guard down, and Pomni easily escaped his grasp. She used this opportunity to get on top of him, pinning him down. She stared him down with a mean grin.

“Ah!” Kinger yelped. He did not expect this, but he knew he had it coming. “Tell them I’m busy!” He exclaimed, trying and failing to get away under Pomni’s weight.

“That’s no way to treat baby spiders!” Pomni scolded. She wiggled her fingers too. Oh no… “Don’t tell me you don’t want to meet the babies…” She teased.

“Wait–!” He squeaked. He tried to avert his playful impending doom, but he couldn’t. At that moment, the two girls swarmed Kinger with their horde of baby spiders. Under attack, Kinger yelped and fell over in a fit of laughter. He begged for them to stop, but they didn’t. It had only been a couple seconds. Still, they eased down on the tickling to a level where their dear father figure could stand it. “Oh, Pomni, I’m sorry!” He choked between chortles.

“Don’t be!” She happily remarked. “I feel much better now!” This exchange made Ragatha giggle and sent Kinger into another laughing fit paired with the tickling.

“He’s so wiggly…” Ragatha commented. It was true, he was writhing like an earthworm.

“He looks like a caterpillar!” Pomni added. She then got a mean look on her face and turned to Ragatha. “...Don’t spiders eat caterpillars?”

“NO!” Kinger protested. In vain, he put up his hands to try to protect himself from the silly wrath of his girls.

“I could’ve sworn they do…” Ragatha said as she leaned in. Then, she went in for the kill, with Pomni following quickly behind. Kinger guffawed loudly and helplessly as he thrashed about.

“This is what you get for lying!” Pomni teased.

“PLEASE, I CAN’T TAKE IT!” Kinger admitted. Ragatha and Pomni let him free just then. He panted to catch his breath.

“Kinger!” Ragatha exclaimed. Seeing what she put him through, she was riddled with guilt.

“Oh my god, are you okay?!” Pomni frantically asked him. Kinger let out one last breathless, soft, emotionally vulnerable giggle and the girls knew he was all right.

“I’m okay, I’m–” He was cut off by Pomni throwing herself onto him for a hug. He tenderly accepted and returned the hug, giving Pomni a gentle pat on her back. Ragatha joined in too. “...just not as spry as I used to be…” Ragatha let out a soft hum of warm contentment. Pomni did, as well. Kinger sighed and held up his finger. “Mr. Tickle Spider… needs a nap…” He said. The two girls giggled at this cute expression.

“All right then.” Ragatha said with a smile. Pomni gave Kinger a pillow to snuggle up with.

“Good night, Mr. Tickle Spider.” She tenderly said.

Takes place after the trilogy of The Super Mario Bros. Movie, it’s sequel I’m envisioning called Super Mario World, and The Super Mario Galaxy Movie I have in mind. This movie will be eerie and scary, like the original Luigi’s Mansion. It will have the same type of storytelling and humor of the other movies, except this one isn’t afraid to portray disturbing content in accordance with censorship guidelines for a family movie. The main premise of this movie, at least for the first part, is King Boo stumbling upon powerful dark magic embodied in a purple jewel. The artifact is very similar to the Orb of Dominance from Minecraft Dungeons. This artifact transforms King Boo from a cartoonish royal ghost into the embodiment of fear and death itself almost instantly. Just like the Orb of Dominance, the jewel seeks a host and gives them immense power to conquer. (If Bowser had found this thing first, the whole world would probably be destroyed…) The first thing the jewel does is tell him that Bowser must be punished for treating King Boo as a subordinate. King Boo actually is a subordinate to Bowser, and he wasn’t even upset by this, but the jewel has taken over his mind like a parasite. The jewel’s plan is to claim Bowser’s position in power and turn his empire and far beyond into his grim image. What started this idea is a product of my vindictiveness. Even though he’s a fictional character, it upsets me that Bowser uses intimidation and force to get what he wants from innocent people, and there’s absolutely nothing stopping him. So I wondered… What would Bowser do if he had to fight an enemy whom his tactics would do nothing against, for example a ghost? Furthermore, what if this ghost could fight Bowser back in a completely different way than he’s used to: psychological warfare? Bowser loves the feeling of dominating and harassing people he has control over. But he’s never had this done to himself, especially not by someone who he has absolutely no defense against. King Boo under the influence of the jewel gives Bowser such horrifying visions, all of which prey on his insecurities, that from this point on, the tiny shred of good in Bowser’s heart convinces him that being unnecessarily cruel to other people is a waste of his time and energy. He’s no less of a warlord, but he is less of a deranged tyrant, having newfound respect for the lives of his army. Bowser has three nightmares, each one worse than the last. Once it was completed, I realized that I had rewritten A Christmas Carol completely on accident.

The story begins at dusk with some Boos impishly returning stolen goods from a nearby manor. Two Boos are levitating a treasure chest. They’re also wearing stolen jewelry, looking silly. They take the treasure back to Boo Manor, using their ghost powers to phase the treasure through the wall. Later at night, King Boo is jovially floating in a bouncy, carefree gait, enjoying being royalty. Then, he hears something whisper to him. He notices it but shrugs it off. He lives in a haunted mansion, mind you. But the whisper persists. It’s ethereal and alluring. It drives King Boo into a trance. He goes mad searching around the manor for the call. Soon, he appears before his treasury. He floats inside and sees magenta light peeking out of a treasure chest. By now, King Boo looks like he’s on drugs. He magically opens the chest with telekinesis, and the magenta light floods the room. The light dies down, revealing a massive glowing purple crystal inside of the chest.

“Wear me…” the voice commands. Completely at the crystal’s mercy, he lifts the massive jewel up to his crown. He puts it on, and the room explodes in a dark violet energy. Once King Boo is visible again, he’s undergone significant changes. He’s twice as big as he used to be. His eyes have become haunted specks of light encased in a sinister shadowy brow. Even his tongue has turned a deep dark indigo, and his crown has morphed slightly. King Boo then smiles wickedly at the audience, ready to be a source of evil.

In the next scene, Bowser is going to bed after a long day. He tosses himself down on his massive bed, decorated in his image. He closes his eyes and begins to snore.

The first dream starts from Bowser’s point of view. He finds himself in a world identical to his own, except he is the only one there. He is the only person in the whole world. Bowser desires to have the whole world to himself… but not like this. After wandering around the dark lands, he decides to visit the Mushroom Kingdom. The cowardly Toads would certainly provide the reaction Bowser was looking for. Once he arrives at the Mushroom Kingdom, everything is still dead silent. There are no Toads bustling around. Bowser couldn’t even see a single butterfly. In a desperate rage, he gets in his Koopa Clown Car and collides full throttle into the great stained glass window of the castle. It shatters and he roars to announce his presence. Still, no one responds.

"Princess?” He sheepishly asks. "Princess Peach?” Once he realizes that he’s truly alone, he retreats to his enormous ship in his Koopa Clown Car. Upon his return, the Koopa Clown Car is running off of fumes, hardly keeping Bowser afloat. It gives out and drops him a few stories out of the sky onto the scorched land. Bowser is hurt but not injured. In despair, he lets out a very loud roar of anguish to the void. Then, he burns everything around him with his fire breath. Once he realizes that nothing is different now except everything around him is burning, he falls to his knees and starts crying. It’s then he realizes that he’s not alone. He hears King Boo’s patronizing laugh coming from everywhere and nowhere.

“How embarrassing…” He taunts. Bowser quickly wipes the tears from his eyes, visibly scared. He tries to square up against the voice, but he can’t. He then makes out a hazy silhouette of King Boo through the fire that had turned purple. “Come find me.”

Bowser wakes up from his nightmare. He’s unsettled, but he tells himself that it was just a bad dream and goes back to sleep. As he falls back asleep, the image fades into the point of view flying into a scene of Bowser’s castle. Bowser is looking at himself in the third person. He is visibly confused and perhaps even distressed as he sits on his throne, looking at Princess Peach locked in a cage next to him, decorated with a cute pink bow.

“I don’t understand. You’re married to the most powerful man in all the world. You have everything you could ever want. Why are you so upset?” Viewing himself in third person, he can clearly see the absurdity of his confusion, as he looks at the princess in her cage. Princess Peach can’t even look at Bowser because of how disgusted she is. She looks awful, pale and sickly. She stares into space with her heartbroken eyes. After a few moments, she tells him with her voice shaking, “You took away everything I loved… I’ll never see my sweet little Toads again…”

"I have some locked in the dungeon…?” Bowser answers, obliviously. Princess Peach then breaks down into hysterical sobbing. What dignity is there left for her to protect? Bowser simply can’t comprehend why she doesn’t favor this position of immense power over being the princess of the Mushroom Kingdom. He certainly can’t understand how much her kingdom meant to her. In his fantasies, Princess Peach by his side was proud to be married to his highness, looking at him adoringly. "I miss Mario…" She says. Bowser immediately switches from confusion to anger. "You keep that name out of your mouth." Peach isn't afraid of whatever Bowser would do to her. It couldn't possibly be worse than being reduced to this for the rest of her life. So she proceeds to ponder aloud all the things she loved about Mario, which was the opposite of Bowser. Peach knows she’s pouring gasoline on the fire, but she doesn't care at this point. "…I love him.”

Bowser submits to his lowliest, beastly mindset. He takes a deep breath in. Not to calm himself down, but to literally fan the flame developing in his chest. Bowser watches as the flames expel from his mouth to burn the princess alive. However, to adhere to the censorship of a family movie, the part where the flames come out of him is played in slow-motion. The flames turn purple, and the environment dissolves into dark purple mist as King Boo cackles and the princess screams.

Bowser wakes up out of fear. He's lying in his bed… but he can't move. His heart pounds in fear as he sees a colossal image of King Boo silently leering over him in the dark. There's nothing he can do. King Boo looks Bowser in his terrified eyes. "Sleep." He commands. Bowser's eyes fall heavy and he is subjected to the third and final nightmare. Bowser sees himself in his wedding attire standing in front of him. Bowser's conscience has been implanted into Princess Peach during the wedding in the first movie. Bowser not only sees what the princess sees, but feels what she feels. And it's absolutely horrible.

"Lower the prisoners!" Bowser happily commands, giving the princess his respect by the ritual sacrifice of his prisoners. The events play out the way they did in the first movie, altered to be sped up for pacing. The scene plays where Bowser bursts out of the glacier he was trapped in. In pure rage, he commands the destruction of the Mushroom Kingdom with the most devastating weapon in his arsenal: the bomber bill. Just like in the movie, Mario chases after it in his flying tanooki suit in an attempt to stop it. In The Super Mario Bros. Movie, Mario is able to redirect the bomber bill from the Mushroom Kingdom. However, King Boo decides to show his own creative interpretation of this event. Princess Peach watches Mario, a tiny dot in the distance, doing everything he can in order to stop the attack. It doesn't work. A melancholy piano cover of “Peaches” plays as the bomb descends. In the part where Bowser says “I love you” in the song, the bomb detonates, destroying the Mushroom Kingdom. The bomb explodes upon hitting the castle, leaving nothing but a purple mushroom cloud behind. The shockwave can be felt from where they're standing. There was absolutely no way Mario could have survived this. Remember Toad's innocence and childlike vulnerability? This combined with his pride and love for his homeland kills him inside. He sobs into the princess's dress. Bowser picks Princess Peach up off the ground like she's a doll, and Toad falls to the ground trying to hold onto her. "Looks like you have to live with me now!" he jokes. The scene cuts to him laughing at his own sick joke. The world morphs around his head, turning into Bowser's bedroom. Bowser wakes up, panting. At least he can move now.

Bowser recognized the haunting figure as King Boo, one of his subordinates. In fear of falling into another night terror, Bowser crawls out of bed and walks towards Kamek’s quarters. Bowser tries to wake him up from his sleep.

“Go back to sleep, little one…” Kamek sleepily mumbles, forgetting Bowser isn’t a child anymore. Bowser feels patronized and frustrated. “Kamek, wake up. I had a terrible omen.” He shakes Kamek awake. It works, but he’s still tired. “I had the most horrible nightmare of my whole life. Someone’s after me!” He insists. Kamek yawns. “It was only a bad dream, sire…” Bowser is not happy. “You don’t understand. There was this evil figure manipulating my dreams. Even more evil than me. It was in my head, Kamek.” He says with dire urgency. Kamek rubs his tired eyes. “It looked like one of my subordinates but corrupted by a horrible evil. I remember the piercing eyes… and a creepy glowing crystal on his crown.” This gets Kamek’s attention. “Was it purple?” He asks in a grave tone. “I think so…” Bowser answers. This can’t be good. Kamek is now fully alert. “This is bad.” Bowser was right. Kamek grabs his magic wand and uses it as a torch. He walks over to a nearby bookshelf and grabs an important looking book. He opens it to the bookmarked page as Bowser watches. The page shows an illustration of the crystal he saw upon his tormentor’s head. “The Dark Diamond…” Kamek muses. “I thought for sure it would choose you as a vessel. There is no telling how this will go…” Bowser is rightfully afraid. “How do I get it to stop messing with me?” “There is only one thing that can be done. You must confront the spirit and convince it that you are the better vessel.” “Are you sure that will work?” Bowser asks. “I’ll go with you. My magic will protect you from the Dark Diamond’s wrath.” The fact that Kamek didn’t answer the question makes him feel uncomfortable. Still, this is the only way to make it stop. If it doesn’t work, nothing will. So it has to work. “Do you know who the vessel was, sire?” Bowser thinks. “It looked like King Boo… except he was twice my size.” “He resides in Boo Manor. Come, sire. Let us make this right.” Kamek hops on his floating Broom. He then summons Bowser’s Koopa Clown Car. Together, they fly off silently into the night.

The two of them arrive at the enormous, decrepit mansion. They look at each other before going inside. Bowser is visibly afraid, and Kamek sternly nods. “You can do this, sire.” He silently tells him. The mansion is eerie and empty. Bowser feels safer with his second-in-command by his side… the wizard who raised him from a baby. Because of his massive size, Bowser can’t fit through any of the doors. This hinders their exploration. Before long, he hears Kamek yelp. He is being attacked by a small horde of ghosts. They advance on him. Kamek tries to shoo them away with his wand, but it’s no use. The ghosts laugh. Kamek shrieks as he is grabbed tightly from behind.

“Go away!” Bowser commands. The fiendish ghosts don’t listen. By now, the ghosts are attacking Kamek so frantically that he has no choice but to retreat. He teleports away, leaving Bowser alone in the mansion. “Shoo! Go away!” Bowser shouts. He tries to sound intimidating, but he’s clearly afraid. The ghosts laugh at him. They retreat not because they were told to, but because they feel like it. Now, Bowser is all alone in the haunted mansion, but not alone at all. Bowser walks around cautiously, like a scared child. He encounters a doorway that he’s too big to fit through.

"Go."

That was the voice from his nightmares. Not knowing what else to do, Bowser trembles in fear as he takes the advice. He steps towards the doorway and sticks his hand out. Miraculously, it phases through the wall. Horrified, Bowser treks through the solid wall.

“Good job, Bowser. Come find me.”

With the help of King Boo’s new power, Bowser phases through walls in an attempt to find where his voice is coming from. King Boo can hardly contain his satisfaction seeing the fearless king of the Koopas like this. Bowser demands the presence to show himself. This only makes King Boo happier to taunt him with his voice, coming from nowhere and everywhere. He laughs and chuckles at Bowser's fear. Bowser, desperately trying to figure out where the sound is coming from, tries opening things. This makes King Boo taunt him harder. "You think I'm in a panty drawer? That’s where YOU belong, you creep!" King Boo lets Bowser wander around until he enters the ballroom, the largest room in the mansion. He says, "If you insist.", referring to Bowser's demand to see him. Bowser turns around a few times. He then turns around once more and sees him. “BOO!” He shouts like a crack of thunder. Bowser is both startled and scared, so he screams and retreats into his shell. King Boo is relishing it. "Are you scared?" He taunts. This forces Bowser back out of his shell, to see King Boo in all his newfound terror. Of course, King Boo’s theme plays, encompassing his demeanor of a sentient nightmare that takes great joy in tormenting its victims. Bowser asks his tormentor what he wants, with fear in his voice. "What do I want?" King Boo responds, amused. "What I want is everything that is yours… you don't seem to want it that much anyways." Bowser tries to respond, but his jaw shakes and nothing comes out. "Don't worry, my lord. Under my control, the Darklands will be grander than you could ever begin to make it."

"Oh yeah?" He gets right up in Bowser's face. "...And how did that go?" Enraged but also afraid, Bowser attempts to shoot flames at King Boo, but the stream is weak. He simply vanishes and reappears nearby. "Pathetic." He turns away. "My version was better, anyways." King Boo pauses to let the hurtful words marinate before continuing. "Under my rule, I will turn the Koopa Empire, and all the world..." King Boo turns ethereal and develops into a form. The form he takes is Dry Bowser... making Bowser look at his own corpse. "...INTO MY IMAGE!" He bellows. Bowser screams in terror. King Boo then taunts him about how his undead kingdom will last until the end of days, ending with, “...and you will not.” By this point, Bowser is panting in fear. King Boo in the form of Bowser’s dead body tells him, “...Maybe I could help with that?” Bowser is confused. After all that King Boo put him through, was he going to form an alliance with him? Then, King Boo morphs back into his own shape, and his crystal upon his crown glows. It summons a large frame. The interior of the frame has a strange, ethereal glow. He positions the large frame to hover directly over Bowser, who is too scared to even move. Then, King Boo slams the frame down on top of him. He slowly lifts it up off the floor, showing Bowser trapped in a painting. He gazes upon the painting, admiring his execution of cruel pity. He then drops the painting down on its face and leaves. As he goes, he amuses himself with Bowser's song in his raspy voice. "...the end of the line... I'll make you mine..." He vanishes through the wall.

By morning, Bowser’s disappearance had caused much discord throughout the land. The Koopa Clan is in discourse. They turn to Kamek, Bowser’s second-in-command, for guidance and instructions. Kamek tells the Koopas not to worry, and that he will do everything that he can to return things to normal. The first thing he does is search for anyone who might be able to help him in this search. Meanwhile, Bowser’s disappearance is being discussed at the Royal Mushroom Council. The entire kingdom is there. So are the land’s heroes, the Mario Brothers. As Princess Peach is discussing what the disappearance of Bowser would mean for the Mushroom Kingdom and beyond with her royal Mushroom Retainers, something very unexpected happens. Out of the blue, Bowser’s second-in-command spontaneously appears in the castle, floating on his broom. As the crowd panics, Kamek grimly floats down towards Princess Peach. Mario tries to advance forward, but Luigi holds him back.

“We need your help.” Kamek announces. The crowd gasps. “I suppose you know that King Bowser has gone missing. I know where he went.” The crowd clamors again. “His last known location is Boo Manor. But beware… a sinister energy has enveloped that place.” The crowd gasps. Princess Peach is shocked. “That is why I come to you. You have something that is absent from the entire Koopa Clan. Princess Peach, you have a soul that is pure and brave. That will make it incredibly difficult for the dark energy to consume you. I implore you, you are the only one who can save our king.” The crowd goes silent. “If you won’t do it for a hostile, imperialist kingdom, do it for a scared child. Prince Bowser Junior is worried sick.” “I’ll go.” Princess Peach declares. "If the princess is going, I'm going too!" Toad adds in his squeaky voice. Peach looks at him worriedly. "Safety in numbers." Kamek states. "Come on, Toad Brigade, let's do this thing!" Toad enthusiastically calls. The other brigade members, chosen from the Royal Council of Mushroom Retainers, aren't so ecstatic. The remaining Mushroom Retainers give them their best wishes. "I'm coming, too." Mario declares with a grim determination. This leaves Luigi subject to immense peer pressure. The entire kingdom of adoring little Toads looks at him expectantly. "Ugh… All right, I'll go." It's not like he can win this battle by doing absolutely nothing. "Is that everyone?" Princess Peach asks. When no one else volunteers, she decides this is it. "Gather round." Kamek commands the group. He then uses his magic to summon some Koopa Clown Cars. Mario, Luigi, Princess Peach, and Captain Toad board one. The rest of the Toad Brigade board the other. Kamek hops on his broomstick and leads the way. "How do we steer these things?" Mario asks. "Just focus." Kamek tells him. They all take Kamek's advice and together follow him out the palace doors.

Eventually, they all make it to Evershade Valley. In contrast with the sunny, colorful Mushroom Kingdom, this place is eerie and dark. The trees and even the ground seem dead. Dark clouds loom overhead. There are a handful of decrepit mansions and houses, but none so enormous and lavish as the one that significantly dwarfed all the others. It was somewhere between an extravagant mansion and a palace fit for a king… if it weren't in ruin. "There it is." Kamek announces. "Boo Manor. Home of the King of the Boos." "What's a Boo?" Luigi asks? He's frightened. "Boos are a type of ghost." Kamek answers. Luigi groans and leans onto his brother. The Koopa Clown Car topples slightly. "Beware, they are mischievous spirits capable of causing harm. In spite of this, they are rather shy. If you try to look one in the eyes, it will hide. Remember that." "See, Luigi?" Mario says, "The ghosts are more afraid of you than you are of them." "I disagree…" "Kamek, will you be venturing with us into the building?" Princess Peach asks. "Not on my luckiest stars!" He declares. "Unlike you, your benevolence, I am highly susceptible to the influence of this dark magic. Keep your guard up, everyone." The party's stomachs churn in fear. Not long after, they descend to the entrance of the great mansion. The party dismounts their Koopa Clown Cars, while Kamek stays on his broom. Through a broken window, Mario peeks inside. "Gee… it's awful dark." "Did you bring a light?" Luigi asks. Mario looks back at him over his shoulder. "No." "Don't worry guys, I got this." Toad announces. He takes a headlamp out of his backpack. He wears it and turns it on with a click. "That's my Captain Toad." Princess Peach says. Despite his childish demeanor, Toad is very competent. On top of this, he provides great moral support. With the light of his headlamp, he fearlessly enters the haunted mansion. All the others follow behind him. In the dark mansion, Luigi asks a question. "You don't happen to have a spare flashlight, do you?" Captain Toad takes off his backpack and rummages around inside it. He pulls out a flashlight. "Catch!" He throws the thing at him, and Luigi almost drops it. "How come he gets the flashlight?" asks the green Toad. "He asked first."

As the group is exploring the mansion, ghosts are spying on them. Instead of attacking, they watch and wait. The ghosts do make eerie sounds in the dark to scare them, though. That's what they do. Luigi is the most reactive to these sounds, nearly jumping out of his skin every time he hears anything. Mario does his best to calm him down. At one point, Captain Toad notices something that looks very out-of-place. On the walls of this mansion of a time come and gone was a device that looked like some sort of security camera? "What's that?" the blue Toad asks. After that very moment, the device flares to life. The camera lens-looking part of it flashes a bright green light. And before they know it… the entire Toad Brigade is gone. They disappear into hologram-like forms before being quickly sucked into the machine, not leaving a trace behind. "WHAT JUST HAPPENED?!" Luigi shrieks. He's saying exactly what the other two are also feeling. Mario angrily approaches the device. "Hey, give them back!" He commands. He shakes his fist. "Mario, you're gonna attract ghosts!" Luigi whisper-yells. "You've been screaming this whole time." He retaliates. Luigi can't argue with this. Princess Peach looks solemnly at the thing that abducted her Toads. "All we can do is keep looking." She grimly declares. "We'll find them again, I'm certain of it." The brothers trust her. They follow her around, guided by Luigi's flashlight. The light is shaking like a leaf in the wind as he holds it in a death grip.

Eventually, they find the enormous ballroom. It's lavish even in severe disrepair. The dim light shining through the grand windows lights up the room enough that they can explore without Luigi's flashlight, so they split up. As they're exploring, Luigi finds a huge picture frame face-down on the floor. In curiosity, he lifts it up to get a better look at it. When he does, he yelps. The other two look in his direction. "Guys, I don't like this…" He says, his voice shaking in fear. Princess Peach and Mario walk towards him and the massive painting. Luigi lifts it up again for the others to see. They gasp in horror.

What they see is a painting of Bowser. But this is no ordinary painting… they can see that's Bowser himself trapped in there. Even though he's not moving, his terrified eyes plead "Help me". The three gawk helplessly at the painting. Just then, they hear a deep, ghostly cackle. "You took the bait. I didn't know whether to expect you or not. Sorry the place is such a mess…" "Who are you?" Princess Peach asks assertively. However, she's undoubtedly afraid. "Would you look at that… the princess of the Mushroom Kingdom. What's your name, Princess Toadstool? I don't care." He pauses while the hearts of the heroes pound in fear. "You're such a kind soul… coming to rescue the warlord who showered you in his abusive love." Princess Peach gets angry at this, but mostly afraid. Exactly what he intended. "And if it isn't the famous Mario Brothers… you thought rescuing the Koopa King would be a good idea. What do they feed you brothers anyway, gullible soup?" He chortles at his own remark. "Sh-show yourself!" Mario demands. He goes into a defensive position. "…If you insist."

King Boo spawned into the center of the ballroom with a ghoulish cackle. All three protagonists scream. This ghost is about the size of a small planet, and the dark magic enveloping it only makes him even more menacing. "Welcome to my home, my dear guests." He taunts. "You may never want to leave!" He then stares down Princess Peach. "No wonder Bowser lusted for you… you are a beautiful woman." "Leave her alone!" Mario commands. He gets in front of her to protect her. "Why, she looks like she belongs…" King Boo uses his dark magic to conjure a large, ethereal picture frame. "…in a painting!" All three of the heroes look upon the sorcery in terror. King Boo smiles wickedly as he makes a monster out of the nearby grand piano with ease. The piano monster advances towards Mario, gnashing its giant sharp teeth and making horrible off-key sounds. This forces Mario to run away. Princess Peach tries to run away as well, but before they knew it, King Boo slams the picture frame down onto her. He conjures another and does the very same thing to Mario. King Boo then conjures a third one, but then he looks Luigi in his horrified eyes. He decides to spare him, but not out of mercy. The piano monster changes back to normal. "No…" He muses, still holding the magical frame over Luigi's head. "I think I'll leave you here." The frame disappears. Luigi looks up at King Boo, his heart pounding out of his chest. "Let's play a game, shall we, Luigi?" He lifts up the haunted paintings of his brother and the princess for him to see. "Let's see if you can get your friends out of these paintings. If you can't… well… I'll let you use your imagination. It won't be pretty." Luigi feels like he's about to pass out. "Good luck, Luigi Jumpman Mario. You're going to need it. Now… I have a world to take over." With these words, King Boo vanishes in a flash of dark light, as do the paintings. And now, Luigi is all alone. No more Mario. No more Princess Peach. They're as good as dead.

Upon this crushing realization, Luigi breaks down in tears onto the floor. Why would anyone take his only brother from him? Why? Thoroughly believing that he'll never hug his big brother again, Luigi cries himself to sleep on the floor.

*Later, after the sun has gone down*