I saw a resilience in colored fog,
A shifting of attentions,
Subtle energyā¦vibrant and burning
Pressed together like fall leaves
Between the pages of a story we picked up onā¦
Right where we left off
Our book, a mark, to leave the place to start a new chapter
The dust jacket is tattered and slightly faded from the sunny daysā¦like a well loved story
One read over and overā¦like a memory
Inside thereās an inscriptionā¦.it reads:
The Acoustic Poet & Sleepless With Out You, Not Seattleā¦always.
Itās in two different scriptsā¦different colorsā¦always Crimson and blue. Slightly smudgedā¦but then again my writing was never the easiest to decipherā¦
Chapter one - Instant chemistry
Lost in a maze of stairs and perfectly manicured patches of grassā¦learning how to tie a perfect Windsor knotā¦a kiss that stopped the world from turningā¦
Friendsā¦adopted family, cars filled with 22 years of books, dusty clothes and trinkets forgotten in dusty cornerā¦your laugh and smile holding me together as my world fell apart around me and I started overā¦hand in hand with the only one who kept me groundedā¦
Fast forwardā¦.kittens dreaming lazily next to cups of tea and Harry Potter booksā¦our little furry daughterā¦.pause. Remember how she used to curl up smaller than an Xbox controller? Rewindā¦our family curled upā¦dusty light shining through a screen door. Lazy Sunday.
Fast forward past the part where I lost you. Two years of self discoveryā¦mistakes made in hazy judgementā¦lessons learned in waves crashing on piersā¦lovers that took my attention but never that integral piece of who Iāve always beenā¦
Chapter 13 - coffee shop smiles
I looked calm but my palms were red from repeatedly rubbing them on my jeans to try and stop the nervous reactionā¦
I saw you first I thinkā¦the only one, freeze. See? Thereā¦that smileā¦you looked at meā¦likeā¦wellā¦you know. You knew then didnāt you? That I neverā¦that the last time wasnāt the end of this storyā¦
I never really used bookmarks not the traditional way at leastā¦I always had them but you laughed when I folded up old receipts and neon colored index cards in their placeā¦stop.
Windows rolled down wind rushing through what you fondly refer to as feathered hairā¦Iāve never known what you meantā¦the only thing running through my mind was gorgeousā¦intriguing. That energy that drew countless admirers to youā¦yet, me. I paused a lot in between steamy sips looking through foggy cafe windows in your absenceā¦I never could figure out why. You walked into dark spacesā¦filled them with this buzzy warm light and laughterā¦I always swore there was a hidden music there even when you were being obnoxious and way too loud, I always acted annoyedā¦I love(d) it though. It makes you who you areā¦
Likeā¦
The perfect day in berkā¦sunsets on windy hillsides over looking lost souls and a city full of dreamersā¦
Bookshop familiarsā¦black and white fuzz at our feet as we browse stacks of anything from philosophy to the fairytales we grew up wanting to be a reality.
Dare. Be the person I needed when we first met, be my light and my homeā¦be someone youāll be proud ofā¦.like I was always proud you were mine. The light to my shadow
Truth. Iām terrified. Feelings tend to fuck me over. Iām safe not letting it sink itā¦but your stories and nervous hiccups found a way into places I never thought anyone could reach.
Promise. I promise Iāll fight the darkness in my heart and head everyday and adore you as much as I did the moment I saw youā¦and I promise to love you for who you are and who weāll grow to be together.
