it's been a wild ride! What was supposed to be a year where I get the last few items on my list was in fact, the year I grew my collection to double what it was.

So many good buys. So many quality toys. So many pretty pours. My collection was supposed to stop once I got my Coffee Titans, but... it did not!

And because I refuse to count or put up each and every toy I've purchased (there are a few I've yet to talk about or post and it will probably stay that way) here are some highlights...

The first buy of 2024. I requested a custom coffee Kyberwyrm from BBA and a few days later they posted this coloration for a drop that I fell in love with (and subsequently, fell out of love with my custom.). I asked if they would be willing to do a repour and quickly snatched it up when it dropped. The coffee Kyberwyrm was the very first item of mine that sold secondhand! 😀

Some gorgeous Zayns from MTW that I gave the inspo for (Volcanic lava) and requested both models and sizes and boy, did they deliver. When they previewed the toys, my stomach fell with a sense of 'i have to have them, but can I grab them' and I was stuck with that feeling right up until the moment they dropped. I still can't believe I got not only them, but a really pretty suction cup as well. 😮‍💨

Some Splice customs from XCA. My first custom with them which would lead my down a path of 2 more customs. I knew I was going to get a bunch of models from this shop, I had tried dwindling my list down from about 6 to only 2...

I now have 4 and I want one more. 😂

The Coffee Titans are where my collection was supposed to stop. 🫣 I had been *begging* PPS for these coffee pours to go along with my Medium coffee Titan, which I couldn't even use because it's too large. I couldn't pick which size I wanted... either a mini or a small. I think I had settled on small, but when they showed a preview of both, it was a wrap! *yoink*

Another pour inspo request from MTW and another week of having bubble guts over knowing I wanted these items, but scared they were gonna get snatched up before I could complete payment. Especially since a few people showed interest in them. thankfully I got them both and then I immediately wanted to throw up after. 🤮

HPE gave me my first and only maw, and what a beauty! The model is so creepy and gross... but in the best way! the teeth, the split tip tongue! then we get into that gooey pour over neutral colors and you couldn't dream up a more perfect series of events that brought me this love.

A mind blowing custom from FP! I feel like I can never do them justice! The owner was amazing at matching the colour of my very shoddy attempt to do the lineart and they very graciously completed the set. They even kept my custom color as a permanent option for future customs! I love this set so much, every item works wonderfully and whenever I pull them out of the bag, I get giddy over how pretty the colors are. 😍

A very much full circle moment from WV came late this year. I have last year's Sandworm Joruun and really wanted a match, so I purchased the matching Obscura a few weeks later. Ad much as I loved obscuras shape, it was just too big to fully use. a full year later, I requested the same pour in the inspo thread and they came through. Also sold the Medium sized one a few weeks later to a very lovely person. 💚

The last big purchase of the year and one that couldn't be more perfect was these Xeno inspired pours from HPE that are in the wanted models, needed sizes, and in a dual firmness pour that is just beyond perfect. This was such a good drop day, I remember I wanted these so bad I had a plan mapped out the night before about how I was gonna purchase them. 😂

And last, but not least, my most recent WBT models, the Small Human Bard and Xsmall Dwarven Barbarian in a bug inspired pour that complements my rubber ducky Shadow Demon from the year before. I had been wanting to do companion customs when I saw how well rubber ducky turned out (and WBT drips are the only drips I really like, for some reason) and kinda held back because I had the larger shadow demon as a 'match'. ai had to come to terms that Small Shadow demon just wasn't going to work for me and figured I'd only buy if it got sold. It sold to a very nice person and later that night, it was game on. I got Dwarbarian so fast after debating which party member I wanted more. I then ended up getting Human Bard anyway because I like the character art. 😊

Year 2025 Fantasy Toy Resolutions:

Sell the last 2 toys. I will be SO HAPPY once they sell... I am beyond discouraged, but not willing to go much lower.

Alabaster from XCA whenever the shop opens up customs. I have an idea for customs that makes me giddy!

Ikon either second hand or whenever DTE comes back from hiatus.

be strict with considering new models coming up. I am weak and the teasers already have me in a chokehold.

Purchase from a few shops I haven't purchased from. I have 2 in mind already and maybe one from a mutual who will be opening up next year.

A hand painted toy. I just haven't found a reason for hand painting, but I really like it.

More teenie trades. I freaking LOVED doing those this year.

Maybe a few secondhand squish buys. especially the ones on my list or any HPE squish that look like meat. 😂

get one last custom from Wandering Bard to round out my bug theme?

(not THEE bug, but a pretty bug, nonetheless)

it will be a larger toy (to me, which is just a small instead of xsmall) but should still be manageable given the taper... I think my only hesitation is that the measurements are a bit close to small Shadow Demon, which I just sold due to not being able to use it. The difference is that shadow demon's largest girth was around the middle of the toy, where this one is at the base, and given the length, I don't think I'll hilt it either way. the girth to where I think I will be able to actually use it is manageable.

or...

do I just hold on a little longer (read: probably a lot longer given the holiday sale, conventions, and shop change) and just focus on the dragon custom I really want?

the shop did a surprise drop last night and the model I want was featured, but the size I need in the pour wasn't available. when I tell you I almost cried because the medium is still available!

this is, I think, the signature coloration, too... ughhhhhhh why?!!

I mean... I really want my custom idea, so maybe it's for the best, but it's teasing me by still being available. And the way this custom idea is panning out... this may end up being my most expensive dong, even in small...

ugh.

I'm also still hopeful that the 2 squish I really really want will be available later in the week and I can grab them, but given my track record...

and I'm also looking at a custom squish...

I don't want to be heavy on squish, though. I'm really enjoying the ones I have through trades and secondhand buys and such, though I did put feelers out for HPE kits with Ham Hams pour because I love it so freaking much. 😂

Cyber Monday, Who?!!

I somehow made it through the weekend without a single purchase which... I wish I could say it was harder than it was. Most stores just didn't have the models, sizes, firmness, or pour I felt I needed.

I was close to purchasing some Meeps from Strangebedfellas, but I think I'd rather just hold off and try to buy direct if anyone decides to sell because I just can't really deal with blind bag buys. I did it blind with the Goobers, and I got really lucky with those, the Boners were just slightly disappointing in trying to trade. I'm only now trading the ones I don't want (well, 2 out of the 4? my trade partner for the other 2 hasn't really offered any trades even though they said they were interested.)

Dread the Empire had a drop, but sadly, a small, soft ikon was not included in the pour I was after.

Fantasy grove had an amanita I've been eyeing for a month, but it sold quick once the sale started.

Wyverns Vault had a great 40% off or buy 1 get 1 free squish sale, but I couldn't find a squish I wanted. I sent an email asking if there would be a chance to do customs because I have a feeling what I want will not be dropped, but I haven't heard back.

there were quite a few shops with great sales, just nothing I could see adding to my collection.

I really want an amanita.

and an ikon.

and a snail squish.

and some hand painted Meeps.

but I'm so fucking picky and it SUCKS because as much as I want these items and the great deals that they DID have, there were reasons I couldn't bring myself to buy them. (mostly because the pour isn't right, or the size, or the firmness.)

oh well...

Do I still find it pretty? Can I use it? Does it have sentimental value? Do I have a toy that's very similar?

what I ended up doing is slimming down my wishlist toys and wanting to also sell off a few squish that I don't vibe with. I went from 6 toys on my wishlist to 2 (with one coming up in a drop and the other from a temporarily closed shop.)

there are a few toys that I am interested in, but they all have the same general shape or measurements of a toy I already have. I won't allow myself to get them, no matter how pretty the pour unless I can see myself selling the one it closely resembles.

I'm getting just the one toy, and IF a shop that's closed just so happens to reopen and does a drop, maybe one of those... then I might be done collecting for good.*

I have a few more goobers I want to get and then I'll take a good inventory of squish and see if I want to try to sell or trade them for something else. Tbh, I think I've done ok with the squish selling and trading for the last year that I don't have that many to try to sell, but there are a few I'm on the fence about, and if I'm on the fence, it's a go.

I may just stick to window shopping, reviews, and the usual ramblings on here. I still love the community and looking at pretty dongs, I just think I've capped out on everything I want and I don't need anymore.

*always subject to change.

I'm enjoying sitting down in front of a computer and writing as if I'm talking to a friend, though. I just sit and look at the model I'm about to review and start rambling. I've even been writing more... not dong related things and I don't know how I feel about it.

Im rusty. the brain fog is abysmal. I have a hard time finding the right words.

oh well. I'll never be back to where I used to be. kinda like with drawing. I don't think I could thumb a good stick figure these days.

I have been debating on trying to do my last custom. I have the color palette down and the main idea for the type of pour, but I am terrified it won't turn out right.

The shop has never really let me down with customs, but there's a first time for everything. Given that I cant draw a sketch of exactly what I want and my descriptions are chaotic, I'm scared it will fall flat or what I have in mind and the shop has in mind are completely different.

I think my safest bet is to keep it fairly simple and hope the pour and color speak for itself within the model.

the fact it might actually be my last model is sad. I've been going through different shops and there are quite a lot of cute toys out there, but nothing that isn't close to something I already have.

Marella from HPE still tempts me (my kane is too close in size) and pip (Zeke is close) as well as Hatter from Colorful Cook (I may actually get hatter... ugh, it's so cute!). I have no idea when DTE will open and when it does, I know it's gonna be chaotic trying to grab anything. I want to do more shops that I haven't shopped from before, but again... most of them have models that are close to ones I already have...

One of the ads made me cry last week because it was talking about how certain people deserved to be profiled and stopped by police, and then they show an image of a person who could literally be a family member, and as someone who had a family member shot and killed from unnecessary police violence, who is constantly harassed by good ol' boy cops, that shit was triggering.

does anyone care to hear any of this, though? nah, y'all are just here for silicone dicks. and I get that, but also... I ramble. a lot. welcome to my brain. stay for a while. we serve cake. 🍰

on with the dongs ..

throwback to my first attempt at a cute circle. 10 dongs and a grinder, oh my! My first ever purchase was the Quartz and Bump from

the next day I ordered Grick and Shadow Demon, both in small, from

and then the next day, a medium Titan from

Let me tell y'all... none of them worked out.

Quartz and Bump were way too firm, Grick and Shadow Demon were way too big and Titan? yeah, that's comical. it's still my largest model and one I have no intention of ever trying to use.

I fixed the issue by ordering Shadow Demon and Grick in extra small, and then Adventurer from

Adventurer, btw, is an anomaly for me. it's only flaw is that I ordered it too firm before I realized that medium firmness was not a good fit for me, but this is the only silicone toy (other than my BBA Dominion packer) that gives me body euphoria. it's coloration makes it feel like this could literally be my dick... if I had a shimmery gold undertone. it even has a tiny pigment shadow in the same place I have a freckle. it is perfect.

I then ended up getting my Isonade from

and a week later, decided it needed a buddy, so I ordered the matching Sylph. this was even before I used Isonade, and once I did, I realized I really liked thinner models, but it still felt a little too... hard when it came to the texture. Up to that point, the only toy that I felt I did a decent job with was my extra small Shadow Demon.

Calypso from Paladin Pleasure Sculptors came soon after because I felt I needed a pretty grinder to round it all out and I had been trying to snag one for 2 or 3 drops by that time with no luck. I'm glad I didn't get my first attempts in the long run because the ones I was going for didn't really match my style, I was just trying to grab any one I could and they were in such high demand. when I saw this pour, though, I was determined. I'm still really surprised I got it.

All of the squish came free from PPS for their Valentine's Day and Easter freebies. 🖤

And... pile!

Anyway, thanks for sticking through my short ramble... I hope you enjoyed the cake. if you're on 💙☁️, find me. I like to think I'm fairly friendly in between the awkward and weirdness.

it was supposed to get there by last Monday and so far nothing. in fact, they sent a message asking if I may have forgot, as they did as well, and my stomach dropped because this was on either Tuesday or Wednesday, and for the most part, my packages usuals get to people a little early.

I'm not sure what went wrong, but I'm starting to think maybe I should have put it in another envelope. the post official said it was fine and then requested I pay a little extra because it was just a little thick, but nothing out of the ordinary. I've sent seeds, pins, coins, patches, and small candies with no issues.

ugh... it makes me nauseous thinking of it. I should have done tracking, but I figured since I'd never had an issue and it was technically a free item, I'm just sad I'm out of a squish, maybe. I sent the trade person a copy of my receipt as proof and then requested they not send theirs out at least until mine shows up.

I might need to check about my shadow demon as well. ughhhhh... but that one isn't supposed to arrive until Monday, so there's time.

the payment finally went through yesterday night, so I was able to box it up and have it sent off today. i hope they like it and that the trouble they went through is worth it. it truly is a nice toy (hence why I'm getting it's replacement) but just can't do the medium firmness, but I do see how it could be appealing depending on its use.

Another trip to the post office makes me realize how big of a convenience desert I'm in. it's the same distance in every direction and its... not close. Postage costs are kicking my ass as well. I would have thought a box I'm having shipped within the same state would be cheaper than the price of a slightly lighter box going across country...

yeah, my next ones, I'll have to factor in shipping. The good news is that this one was a little cheaper than I anticipated, but...

then p@yp@l fees took almost $5.

I ordered my replacements for both Bump and Quartz soon after I got the confirmation, even though Quartz hasn't sold. Etsy kinda fucked that all up for me. i also couldn't make up my mind on having Bump be soft or super soft, but the shop owner assured me that in super soft, it will stand without falling over. not that it's a super big deal since I can't display any of my toys. and given how... ridged medium firmness is with all that texture, I think super soft will be nice.

I'm almost positive soft for Quartz will be great because it's pretty close to Zeke in shape and Zeke in soft is freaking luxury.

With that being said...

ive decided after I get the 3 replacements (HPE and BBA) and customs becomes available (XCA) i am done collecting.

yeah, yeah, yeah... I've said that before, but my bank account dictates. also, I've been getting sick more and more and can't even use them... also, the living arrangement means I don't even see my toys most of the time.

what's the point? granted, I don't regret it at all. this is something I really enjoy, even though it's gotten maybe a little out of hand (I only wanted 1 perfect dong, y'all!) I'm constantly going through my collection trying to see if there are any I want to sell to downsize, and I just really like them all. this is the first time in my life I've EVER been able to collect anything and feel safe.

but yeah... reality is, that's all I can allow myself. if I sell the remaining toys, I will technically only be paying out of pocket for the custom. I'll make an official sales post tomorrow and just have my fingers crossed that I can get replacements I need (want).