#don'tleave

Me: What am I going to do with you? I don’t want to say how I feel because every time I do, you take it as a personal challenge.

But you thought wrong. I've been through hell. I almost died. It felt like breathing became an obligation rather than necessity. I never wanted you to give up, I never wanted to give up either. And believe me or not, I still think about you all the time. I can't let go. I am still trying to figure out what's best for us, if there is still "us". I don't want to forget you. I still can't let go of you. Maybe because if I let go, I let go of the possibility that you'll come back and be with me or maybe I'm too afraid that I'll put an end to the only thing that reminds me of you, of us; the only thing that connects us, my grief.