sometimes i think i would have a better chance at a future in source, which is an insane thing to say because i didn't have a future. i ruined my life trying to pay my bills and make sure robin was safe. i just needed my robin to be safe. i think without him i would have never survived more than a few weeks, if that. i needed to make sure he could stay safe and didn't have to do what i did.
i owe a lot to Sydney too. I didn't get to know them as well as i wanted to but they were kind to me. Protected me. I came to school sometimes just because i knew it would be safer if i passed out where he could find me before anyone else. sometimes i dream about confessing everything to them but i don't know if it happened. in my dreams he is always so kind but i would understand if it made me disgusting to them. im disgusting to me, too.
MC/Player (DOL fictive)
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