#dol writes

Shortly after shift change, the self-described “ruggedly handsome” mass of spiky black hair with signature nose bandage was minding his position at the gate to the village. A sharp bird call caught his attention, and he turned his head to better hear the staccato chatter. He narrowed his eyes, searching the treeline for the tiny brown crown and white eyebrow he knew should be responsible for the call. It wasn’t long before his keen gaze settled on the singer in question, perched proudly on a nearby tree, preening its feathers.

“Izumo, look! Look! That’s a bullheaded shrike!! They’re cute little bastards, but absolutely ruthless. They sometimes impale their prey on sharp branches or bits of metal around the village, to kill them or just store the food for later, like sadistic little war trophies.” He watched, admiring, as the bird continued to preen what were likely the remains of its tiny enemies from its even tinier beak. His sigh was almost wistful. “If I ever make it to ANBU, I want my mask to be a shrike. What would you wanna be?”

His question was met with a conspicuous silence from somewhere to his left.

Kotetzu cleared his throat, remembering, too late, that they were in the middle of a fight.

“Ahem, um… you know I meant it last night when I said I was sorry, right?”

Silence.

“This is gonna be a looooooong shift if you won’t talk to me.”

A louder silence.

Kotetsu sighed.

“Look, I know that sharing a sexual fantasy is a deeply vulnerable thing to do, and I’m honored that you told me. I really am. I think it reflects positively on our relationship, that you felt safe enough to disclose something like that. I should not have laughed.”

Finally, Izumo deigned to acknowledge his existence by shooting him the most scathing look he could possibly muster.

Kotetsu cringed.

“I’m so sorry, I really thought you were joking! But since I didn’t sleep much on the couch last night -that thing really is a deathtrap, by the way- I had a lot of time to think over what you said. It makes sense! We’re always put in these dangerous situations and shinobi, where we gotta be in control or we die. Sex is all about letting off steam, right? So a fantasy where you’re all tied up and helpless-”

Izumo, face like thunder, slapped a hand over his boyfriend's mouth.

“While I do not forgive you for laughing in my face when I told you I wanted to roleplay being abducted, someone is coming and so-help-me-god-if-you-don’t-shut-up-right-now-I-will-drown-you!” He hissed.

Kotetsu looked to where, sure enough, a woman with black hair in two spiky ponytails on either side of her head was approaching. She carried a decently sized pack, although she was dressed in civilian clothing- a modest blue yukata that swirled fetchingly around her ankles in the pleasant summer breeze. She waved to them, a bright smile on her face.

A deep, masculine voice spoke up from just behind their shoulders, “While I’m thrilled you two have a strong foundation of trust to explore your sexual fantasies, I’m not thrilled I will be taking that knowledge to my grave.”

Kotetsu and Izumo both jumped a mile at the sudden and wholly unwelcome presence of their honorable war leader, who stood beside them and waved back to the woman.

Izumo recovered first, shooting Kotetsu a look that promised many more nights on the couch to come.

“Shikamaru, haha, I didn’t see you there!” Kotetsu laughed nervously.

Shikamaru smiled at them with an unholy calm.

“I didn’t expect so, considering you were busy discussing your BDSM negotiations. I will graciously assume your oversight was due to the fact that I was coming from inside the village, as you have appeared to catch my cousin’s arrival.” 

“Ahh..cousin?”

Shikamaru gestured lazily as the woman reached them.

“Himari, you’re right on time.”

The woman, Himari, stepped forward and embraced the taller man in a warm hug.

“Shikamaru, good to see you!” She pulled back, holding him at arm’s length, smiling as if they hadn’t seen each other in years. “And of course I’m on time, wouldn’t dream of being troublesome!”

With the two standing together, Kotetsu could see the resemblance. Himari had the same forehead and fine eyebrows as Shikamaru, although her nose was a little more flat and her lips more full and feminine. The fine wrinkles around her eyes and mouth with her smile suggested she was a bit older than Shikamaru, but probably not by much. Really, the resemblance was uncanny. Even her two pony tails were mirror images of Shikamkaru’s inverted-pineapple style. 

“How are your brothers?” Shikamaru asked politely, offering her his elbow.

Something flashed in Himari’s eyes that put Kotetsu on alert, despite her civilian clothes. She took Shikamaru’s arm with practiced ease, whipping out a small folding fan and flicking it open to cool herself.

“Oh, up to all kinds of trouble,” she said airily, “I can’t wait to tell you about it. Shall we start at the teahouse?”

Shikamaru nodded along in a way that suggested he was suppressing a sigh. He threw a meaningful look to the two guards. “As long as the village is still standing by the end of your shift, I don’t care. Got it?”

The newcomer flicked Kotetsu playfully on the shoulder with her fan. “I think you should just go for it. Really be the Gaara to his Naruto, you know? Bet you won’t be sleeping on the couch after that.”

‘Himari’ landed the inflammatory statement with a wink and sauntered past.

“Naruto,

There is great honor and expectation of a marriage between the village leader and a high-ranking clan. It is not undone without consequence. As your Hokage and teacher, it is my responsibility to confirm it is truly what you want.

Only you can decide.

If you wish to marry Hinata, you have my blessing. Konoha would gain a strong alliance and you a partner to stand beside you. But if you do not, if even a shadow of a doubt lives in your heart, it must be faced. Engagements can be reconsidered. A marriage, once sealed, is far harder to rescind.

This is your final lesson, Naruto. Take two weeks, use them as you must to make your choice. Think of Konoha, but more importantly, think of what is best for you. If you marry because you believe it is expected, then your union becomes a sacrifice, and we will all suffer for it.

When you return, there will be no punishment. No consequences. Your choice is yours alone, and I will stand by it. But you must choose.