hm. sometimes i think abt how much i want a binder, but then i remember i'm too scared of people asking questions.
i don't even really have a good reason for wanting one?? i don't know what my gender is tbh. she/her is nice. it's good and i'm used to it. they/them is new, but it's fine too. it's just... a bit weird? like it's not like i'll feel horrible if people don't use it for me, but i don't mind it? i know i don't prefer he/him bc it just doesn't fit who i am.
but i just. idk man. i could be cis and just "going through a phase" for all i know. i just think they/them is fine, i don't mind it. i'm used to she/her and feel "feminine" most days and like femme-directed nicknames/pet names. i used to think that i wouldn't mind she/her or they/them, but i don't really know anymore? gender confusing, and i'm new to the whole "questioning your gender" thing. atm i just use the enby label
where was i going with this??? oh, binder fjdks
some days i like my boobs and don't mind them. but other days i'm like ">:/ these are annoying and i think i want them off" for aesthetic reasons (i think). i often think abt how nice it would be to be flat, and i wonder if i would like it better that way.
it's made me wonder if i'm reasons for wanting a binder are somewhat selfish? since my reason for wanting one isn't really for dysphoria. but logically i know that it isn't. no one is going to critique me for wanting one.
tldr; kinda want a binder, kinda don't? gender confusing
