#disabledteacher

disabledteacher | neuroditeacher autiteacher | adhdteacher

disabledteacher: a gender related to being disabled and a teacher, a disabled teacher, etc.

neuroditeacher: a gender related to being neurodivergent and a teacher, a neurodivergent teacher, etc.

autiteacher: a gender related to being autistic and a teacher, an autistic teacher, etc.

adhdteacher: a gender related to having adhd and being a teacher, being a teacher with adhd, etc.

more genderteacher terms! colors are from the disabled, neurodivergent, autism, and adhd flags, and the terms are 'disabled' + 'teacher', 'neurodi' from 'neurodivergent' + 'teacher', 'auti' from 'autism' + 'teacher', and 'adhd' + 'teacher'!

flag id: four flags of the same format. they each have a background; a 'frame' made up of somewhat thin stripes along the left, top, and right edges; a 'book' shape at the bottom edge made up of two shallow curves that dip and meet in the middle, with a thin outline along the top edge of this shape to be a 'book cover'; and three 'pencils' above the book that are made up of long rectangles which emerge from one side of the 'frame' and thin triangles at the opposite end that point at the other side of the 'frame'. the first and third 'pencils' point to the left and the second points to the right.

in the top left flag, the frame is caramel brown, the background is dark grey, the first pencil is faded green, the second pencil is faded sky blue, the third pencil is soft yellow, the book cover is faded red, and the book pages are cream. in the top right flag, the frame is caramel brown, the background is very dark faded green, the first pencil is soft indigo, the second pencil is soft green, the third pencil is golden yellow, the book cover is dark pinkish-red, and the book pages are cream.

in the bottom left flag, the frame is caramel brown, the background is very dark faded green, the first pencil is red, the second pencil is teal, the third pencil is light greenish-yellow, the book cover is dark red, and the book pages are cream. in the bottom right flag, the frame is caramel brown, the background is very dark red, the first pencil is orangish-red, the second pencil is red-orange, the third pencil is light yellow-orange, the book cover is dark pinkish-red, and the book pages are cream. end id.

banner id: a 1600x200 teal banner with the words ‘please read my dni before interacting. those on my / dni may still use my terms, so do not recoin them.’ in large white text in the center. the text takes up two lines, split at the slash. end id.

Written and posted on February 5th, 2022

Content warning : This post contains a brief description of intense OCD symptoms, mention of an eating disorder, anxiety and depression.

Before I started teaching college French in the fall of 2018, I wondered (and worried) that my students might treat my differently because I have Cerebral Palsy. I was worried that maybe they would take me less seriously perhaps.

I started teaching and realized that, at least as far as I can tell, my physical disability does not change how they see me. I am now in my fifth term of teaching college students. They respect me, enjoy me and see me as their professor who happens to be disabled.

I remember a story my mom told me in my first year of teaching. She has her own housecleaning business and as it turns out, I think the grandson of one of her clients ended up being in my class. He was telling my mom about this French teacher he had, how she was kind, funny and he thought she was a good teacher. My mom asked if this teacher used a mobility scooter. He said yes, and then my mom told him that this person was her daughter. She told me this story because she said that, when my student was talking about me, he didn’t even mention my disability until my mom brought it up. Meaning that I guess he just saw it as part of me but not necessarily the first thing he thought of. I’m not saying that my disability is not important - there are places for it to be front and center, such as on this blog. I’m just used to that being one of the first things people notice and take with them, and it was cool that for this student it was not the first thing when he described me.

I think in my first year of teaching, I made a point to briefly tell my students about my physical disability just so that they would know. But this year so far, I kind of forgot at the beginning of the term and realized that they don’t necessarily need to know that, unless it comes up or I feel like telling them.

 I think that having a physical disability has influenced my relationships with my students in a positive way. It has made me want to make sure that my students with various disabilities are getting the support they need from the Disability Resource Center at our university, and it has made me feel more comfortable talking with students about these things. 

So far, I have not had a physically disabled student that I was aware of, but if and when I do, I will help them to the best of my ability. I have only had a few students who have needed accommodations and from what I could tell, had either learning disabilities or anxiety.  Accommodations forms do not explicitly state a person’s disabilities or conditions, so I only know if students disclose this to me.

 I had one student last term who was in her early 30s and just within the last year got diagnosed with ADHD. She had asked me if she could stand in class because sitting for long periods made it hard to concentrate. I said of course, and then wrote her an email letting me know about how to get set up with accommodations. She thanked me for sharing that and said that she had no idea what was even available to her because this was her first time in college with this diagnosis. 

Having my own challenges with mental health has definitely impacted how I respond to students dealing with similar things. I have had anxiety since I was young, have had challenges with an eating disorder (ARFID), have had some situational depression and I had an episode of intense OCD when I was 26, in 2017. As I mentioned in my last post, when I started grad school, I was coming down from my very intense OCD period. That spring and summer, things were so bad that I washed my hands until they bled, could not sit down anywhere and could not hug my family members or touch our cats because I was so afraid of contamination. I ended up being able to stay in school with a reduced workload, and this saved me. Being at school and having to be in the world meant that I focused less on my compulsions. I was also taking medication and going to therapy at the same time, but school helped a lot. 

Needless to say, these experiences have made it so that, as a teacher, I have a soft spot in my heart for students dealing with mental health issues, and I want to make sure that they can get resources if they need them. One interesting thing about having a physical disability and teaching kids online (I teach and tutor French on Zoom) is that they cannot tell that I am disabled, because I am usually sitting. For the first time in my life maybe, when I started this job online in 2020, my disability was sort of hidden in a way. I have told some of my students about my Cerebral Palsy, but I get to decide to tell them, which is usually not the case. My Cerebral Palsy is pretty visible and I use mobility devices. So people see it usually and I don’t have a choice. 

As far as how my physical disability affects the physical tasks that able-bodied teachers normally do, it doesn’t change too much for me. I have a hard time passing out papers, and it takes me longer to walk around the room (not doing this because of COVID right now). I can stand for my whole class period - this surprised me, since it’s an hour and 50 minutes. I can use the computer and operate my slideshow with my lessons. It is harder for me to write on whiteboards and chalkboards because I am standing and left-handed (and only 5 foot tall). So instead, I just use a Google Doc or a new slide in my slideshow as a whiteboard.

Are you a disabled teacher? How does your disability/s or condition/s influence your teaching? I never had any disabled teachers (that I was aware of) so I hope to show others that you can be disabled and a teacher, and maybe inspire some people who want to teach (disabled or not). Doing my job as a teacher has increased my independence so much as well.

Posted on January 29th, 2022

1) Teachers / professors do not have to wear certain clothing. It’s about how you carry yourself, how you behave and what you say. 

When I first began teaching undergraduates, I thought that I would have to change my whole wardrobe to be taken seriously. I like to wear colorful clothing a lot, or various patterns. I have since come to learn that this is not the case. I often wear patterned shirts with jeans or sweatpants and my students respect me. I still look clean and professional but also comfortable. Not in a suit. That’s not my style. I try my best to interact with my students in a confident manner and this is important. I have learned now that being a good teacher is not about what you wear but how you are with your students. My students and I have mutual respect for one another which I appreciate.

2) You can still be yourself while also being professional. 

I am naturally a silly, happy and excited person. It is hard for me not to be myself. I thought when I started teaching that being “professional” meant not showing that side of me much. I obviously have a professional persona but she is still very much authentically me. I get excited with my students, make jokes and share bits about my life with them. I have since learned that these qualities help me to be a better teacher because I remind myself that we are all just people. I am a person and my humanity is going to show when I am teaching, as will my students’ humanity. 

3)  You learn every. single. day. 

As a teacher, you are always learning. You are learning from your own teaching (what you struggle with for example) and the class itself. You learn what works and does not work for certain ages / people and groups. You learn how to think quickly and change plans if needed. You learn how to trust yourself and make decisions. You learn a lot from your students. Even though I may have more knowledge in French than they do, they all come with different stories and experiences that they bring to class. Being a teacher challenges me to have a more open mind and see things from different perspectives. 

One recent example of this is that last term, I had a student who hardly spoke in class. After a couple of weeks, I found myself being frustrated with this internally. One day, after I called on her and she seemed especially nervous, I decided to ask her privately why she did not speak in class. It turns out that she was homeschooled and so does not have much experience speaking in groups, and it also makes her really nervous to do. After learning that, I worked with her to come up with ways that she could still participate and not be so nervous. This experience reminded me that you should never assume you know why someone is doing something, and you should try to find out what’s going on so that you can figure out how to proceed. You never know until you ask. 

4) It is okay to admit when you have made a mistake or do not know the answer to a question. 

In my class, I try to show my students that I make errors in French too sometimes, to show them that mistakes are okay and part of learning. I make jokes about it sometimes, to remind them that, oops, sometimes even the teacher makes mistakes. When a student asks me a question, if I don’t know the answer, this is what our coordinator told us to say : “That’s a good question. I don’t know the answer, but I will find out and get back to you” or “Let’s explore this together.” I think it’s also good for them to see that just because I am the teacher does not mean I know everything about French, or that I sometimes forget things. 

Some things I love about teaching :

1) Being in the classroom (virtual or in-person) with my students brings me joy and helps me feel better when I am not feeling my best. 

There have been several days where I am not feeling great either physically, emotionally or both. Maybe I’m having anxiety on the way to work or maybe I had a long day and I wonder how I will make it through a late-afternoon French lesson online. But then I get involved with what I am teaching and with helping my students and it is almost like medicine. It takes my mind off of my current state and allows me to focus on my students. I am very grateful for my job and my students. They keep me motivated and excited even on the hard days.

2) I get do something that I love and share my passion for French with others. 

I feel super lucky that I have a job that I enjoy. As a teacher, I recognize that teaching is not about imparting knowledge to people from me (the supposed authority) to them (the people “under” me). It is about sharing the French language with them and guiding them through their learning. I get to show them cool music, fun words and introduce them to aspects of French and Francophone (other French-speaking countries) culture. I basically get paid to be a French nerd! :) I hope to pass on the inspiration that all of my French teachers (and other teachers) have given me over the years. I try to show my students of all ages how learning a language can be fun and exciting. I know that not all of my students will go on to study French as I did, but no matter how long they are in my class, I want them to have a positive learning experience. 

3) I get to feel fancy. 

I have a nametag that I wear for my university job. It says “Faculty/Staff” on it and it makes me feel professional. I love wearing my nametag. I tell my university students that they can call me either Nirvana or Madame. I enjoy getting emails addressed to “Professor F. (my last name, omitted for privacy). I also love getting emails that begin with “Bonjour Madame.” Both of those feel very fancy and teachery and it makes me feel proud of where I am and how far I’ve come.

4) Being  a teacher still has a lot of responsibility, but it is not the same as being a student. 

Since I have started as an adjunct this fall, I have had this experience quite a few times where I look around at all the students on campus and feel a great sense of relief that I am no longer a student. I still have lots of responsibilities, and many that a student would not have. Of course, I want my students and the others on campus to enjoy their time as a student, and I hope that they do. But I also just think sometimes, “Wow. I’m sooo glad I don’t have homework to do.” If I ever go further in my studies and get a PhD, I’ll be a student again. I know I’ll enjoy that if I do it. I love school. But until then, I will relish my time as just a teacher. 

5) My students (or children’s parents) let me know that they appreciate my teaching, which makes me feel really good.

I have received emails from parents of my school-age students thanking me for my lessons with their children, telling me how much their kid enjoys my lessons and /or how they appreciate that I’m helping their child. It’s cool to have the opportunity to teach children and teens as well, and to play a small part in someone’s development and educational journey. When I taught as a grad student, I received positive feedback from my students. 

So far this year, in a reflective assignment that my students have to do every two weeks, I have had several students tell me that they are enjoying the class and are excited to keep learning French. I have had others thank me for teaching them. Last term, someone let me know that they appreciated that I addressed the subject of newly created gender neutral pronouns in French. This term, a student told me she has anxiety about speaking in class. I asked if there was anything I could do to help make her feel more comfortable. She said that empathy, which she has already seen from me, helps a lot. Hearing these things makes me feel happy and lets me know that I am doing my job well. Sometimes I struggle with the idea that I am not “as good of a teacher” as someone else, or that I’m not doing my job well enough. I’ll dig into that in another post. 

As I have mentioned before, I have Cerebral Palsy (spastic diplegia). I also have some mental health disabilities, generalized anxiety disorder being the main one. I am also a teacher in two capacities : I teach beginning French at my former university to undergraduate students, and I teach French online to kids between 5 and 13. I will talk more about being a disabled teacher more in a separate post. 

I have always loved school, and I admired my teachers a lot growing up. I remember playing school with my childhood friend, except she was always the teacher. I don’t remember how old I was when my mom started saying I’d be a good teacher. I began studying French in high school and fell in love with it, then continued in college. I admired my college French professors as well. I did lots of volunteer and internship work in French immersion kids classes in college. I don’t think I seriously said to myself, “Okay, I want to teach French” until I was at the end of my time as an undergraduate. My relationship with French is similar to how a kite flies - I know I’m in control of it, but it also feels like I am simultaneously being pulled along on an adventure. 

After I graduated (and travelled to France for three weeks in summer 2016!) I applied to a program where I would teach English in France for 6 months. I got accepted, but declined after much thought because I was not ready for such a big jump. I’d never even lived on my own in the U.S before, let alone another country. I ended up applying to the Masters in French program at my university, and I got accepted. Around that time (spring to fall 2017), I began experiencing some severe anxiety and OCD. As a graduate student, I was supposed to start teaching and attending my own classes. I did it for two weeks but then could not keep up because my mental and physical health were struggling. I ended up having to change my schedule and not teach that year, while only taking one class. I am so incredibly grateful to my professors who saw that I was struggling and helped me stay in the MA program. I told them I needed to be in school, to give my mind something else to focus on. I’m not lying when I say that school saved my mental health and helped it immensely. 

The following year (my second year in the MA program, fall 2018 to spring 2019) I felt much better and ready to tackle the challenges of teaching and studying all at once. In late 2019, I got a job with an organization that teaches French to people of all ages in my city. That job went online in 2020 because of the pandemic. I graduated with my MA in spring 2020, and was hired by my former university this fall, this time as an adjunct professor! I originally said I wanted to only teach college French, but now I have realized that I enjoy teaching all ages. I can’t believe I have my dream job! I have gotten these opportunities with a lot of hard work, but also without a lot of previous experience. For example, I did not go to school to study education, but now I teach for a living. 

Today I got a fist bump from my principal (my boss) after telling him I was expecting. The goal was to impress on him that certain rooms used for meetings are not accessible. They require a step for entry or are a long distance from my classroom. 

“Is your current room okay?” 

“Yes,” This is why I requested it. I knew I would need a larger room for wheelchair accessibility. 

“Okay. We will figure things out.”

A list of things my job needs to “figure out” before I become the size of a blimp:

1. Snow Removal (They often don’t start until AFTER 8AM)

2. The meeting room that requires a step for entry.

3. How to keep subs in the building for more than two days.

4. Fire Drills, Tornado Drills or any other drill that requires stairs for safe exodus.