#director brian

Yeeee this one was a good way to revive myself from the art block

2024 has been a hell of a year - many great things, but also a fair share of struggles too, and that's okay. We live, we learn, and we use that to look forward to the future. I'm hoping to be more up and active next year, and I'm excited to talk more about it!

I'll be saving my thoughts for my "Resolution of 2025" update video (nonchalant, I know lol), however - there might be a surprise or two in the works

Suffice to say? I think the Calm is slowly phasing out, and an Archive of ideas has been building up for a bit.

"Another day, another Christmas" is what I would be saying if I hadn't been doing all I could to bring my life to a point where I'm not only working hard at bringing the best possible life for myself, but also slowly but surely regaining the love I had for all the hobbies that kept me sound enough to enjoy said life. It's been a long journey to reach this point, and while I'm still fairly nervous about what the future beholds, I'm not going to let that hold me back on reaching the goals I have laid out for me. There's far more excitement than anxiousness, and sometimes I have to tell myself that so I don't end up getting pulled back into the gutter, but it's because of that excitement that I'm fairly happy this Christmastime.

I have something big planned not just for myself, but to everyone that's continued to see my journey and enjoy all the stories and goofs I've had to share. But today, I want to take the time to provide some letter-like notes to a few of my closest friends that have continued to help me smile over the years.

Let's start with my chums from the Joy Charged Gamerz Crew - first of all, sorry again for not being active on the channel this year xD I know the channel is meant to be more laid back and should only be obliged when we feel comfortable enough to do so. It doesn't change the fact that even now, I'm forever thankful to have been granted the opportunity to not only help and see the channel grow, but also create some fantastic memories with great friends. With the new year on the horizon, I hope we get the chance to create some more memories, and since I've been taking some time to play more games again, I hope that this spark will give me the chance to continue charging others with joy. Merry Christmas, lads, and love ya'll 💛

To many of the new friends that I've had the joy of hanging with a TON this year - @soybeanzoffical, @onyxcolonyart, Slime Guy/mrmendezgamer1, Rambles, Namor, @sparxsiris, Nate, @rubyshimmer0x, and many others, thank you all for being a supportive bunch of lads. Even though we've had a lot of bullying escapades in the past year, I can look back and get a little chuckle out of 'em x3 Much love to ya'll, and here's to another year of my dumbass shenanigans! Merry Christmas, and Happy Holidays, buds :'3 🩷

To one of my good buds in animation, TheInvertedShadow (@asktheshadows), I know we've not spent as much time together, and we've both been going through our own fair share of down moments, but I just wanna leave another reminder for ya; you are always loved and cared for by thousands - if not millions of people, and as one of them, I'm glad to have seen your talent grow since I first laid eyes on your EoI video 10 years back. And if I knew we were going to be a chaotic duo of friendship back then, I'd probably call myself crazy xD But to be serious - you've always been such a supportive friend since we first spoke together back in 2016, and for that, I can't thank you enough, and I'm happy to call ya one of my best friends. Thank you so much for all the great memories, and here's to many more in the future - we both got a lot ahead of us, for sure ;) Merry Christmas, lad ❤️

And speaking of which, to another one of my best buds; Will Ryan (DAGames). Man - what a year it's been, hasn't it? Since the start, you've been constantly moving yourself up higher and higher, and being along with ya for the ride has been nothing short of a blast. I'm legitimately proud of you for all the accomplishments you've made - from the release of HOAA:R (btw to everyone else, bls stream Castle that Burns, kthxbai xD ), the launch of Solitude: Subject Placement, and all the conventions you attended. On that note, it was fucking amazing to be able to see ya again at MomoCon this year, and not just for a day, at that! The experience itself was already amazing as it was, but to be able to hang out with you, the crew, and some of our other friends was probably one of the best memories from this year. I still get choked up thinking back to the concert when Living Life Without The Cord and Gold: SSD played, and I'm so happy that it turned out so well. I know the year hasn't come without it's downsides either, but the fact you persevered regardless and brought some great times with it is something you can't knock. On that note, I also have my own share of thanks to give. I'm wholeheartedly grateful of all the support you've given me during the production of Scarlet Combine leading up to the launch of Storm Before The Calm. To be in a similar pair of shoes that you've worn, it's given me some semblance to the feelings and experiences you've had when you first released HOAA. It can't entirely be compared - that much I know, but to have made something of this calibur has shown me that the work of an artist of any kind isn't to be taken lightly, and while I too wish there were things I could have done better with my album, it doesn't change the fact that I'm proud to have made it possible regardless, and I have you to thank as one of my pillars of inspiration. And even though we may not have had the same experiences with our projects, one thing I can say is that it's helped me understand enough to have your back even more than I have before. It may be difficult to push out the negative thoughts that came from releasing Resurrection, but once you understand the obstacles in your Pursuit of Hope are meant to guide you to the joy you're seeking, it all comes slightly more naturally. I haven't given up on my own pursuit, so don't give up on yours. Thank you for everything, Will, and I love ya to fuckin bits. Merry Christmas, bud 💚

Now, to all the fans that have kept up with my bullshit for so long (sorry by the way xD ), thank you all for being so supportive and patient with me as I work towards the new year - a lot has been on my mind during this long break, and thankfully I'm pushing ever closer to a brighter end where I can be happy with the things I've enjoyed doing for years. There's a lot to look forward to, and I can't wait to talk about some of it when the Resolution of 2024 rolls in on January 15th. I love you all, and I hope you all enjoy the holiday season leading up to the new year.💙

And finally, I have one last person I'd like to speak to; my love, @aspennightray (Shut up, I know it's gay xDD). Words can't express how happy I am to have you in my life. I know this year has had it's struggles for the both of us, and I know that my dumbassery has caused its fair share of frustration with you in fixing some of those things, but this year has also brought some great memories as well. When we first met face-to-face for MomoCon, it was admittedly weird to continue from there like it was just another Discord call, but if anything, it helped make the transition to our time spent in the following 2 weeks all the more comfortable. I won't beat around the bush, but that was by far the best time of my life in such a long while, and has made me confident enough that you are the one I want to be with. While there's been quite a few potholes making the journey to that point fairly difficult, I still haven't given up yet, and I don't plan to anytime soon. You've done so much for me in the past year we've been together for, and while I know many of them were things I could have done myself or many other friends could have done for me, but I suppose it just has more meaning to me knowing it comes from you, especially with how much it's helped me get off my ass and take care of myself. Despite the tail end of this year feeling a bit off for a multitude of reasons, none of that overshadows the fact that it's been an amazing one, and i can't thank you enough for it. I also can't thank you enough for all you've done to bring my ideas to life - no matter how beautiful they've turned out (and they certainly ARE beautiful <3 ), none of that matters as much as the fact that you made it possible. Sure, they may have been "jobs" at the end of the day, but your fascination, interest, and support for Scarlet Combine has been a core spark in ensuring that I completed it, and that means so much to me. Despite the jokes, bullying, and a few moments of irritation, I know you've always believed in my ability to create this new world of mine, and though it will take a good while before I continue it again, I'm excited for what we'll do with it together. Thank you so much for everything, hon, and I hope this Christmas turns out well for you. Even if it doesn't, know that I'll still be here to help make it just a little bit brighter. I love you so much 💜

And that all extents to a very special gift - one I prepared for more than a month in advance... and it was for myself.

Folks, I'm happy to say that in preparation for my plans next year, I have gifted myself a Lenovo LOQ laptop - one that will allow me to bring better possibilities for creating content on my channels. It's a very big step, as it not only gives me a chance to bring that creative process wherever I go, but also shows what I'm truly capable of now that I have a full-time job, and after all that's happened this year, I saw it fitting to make this my reward after taking this well-deserved break.

Now, for some, this scenario may sound familiar to you all, and I'd be lying if I said that there wasn't any caveats to this special treat, and unfortunately one of them came up as of today. Turns out I was possibly given another special gift (nondiscrimitively); Covid! :'D

Yyyyyyup, got it while I was away yesterday, and miraculously the symptoms started coming up as of today (a Christmas miracle lol), once again putting a damper on my mood because sickness is just so much fun. So yeah, there's that. Don't wanna jinx anything just yet, but I'll make it through this regardless. Thank God I got mood tea for Christmas too - that's what woke up my spirits before, and I'm probably gonna be drinking tons of it. =_=

All that aside though, the other caveats of getting this new laptop stems from just how little time I have nowadays to work on things, but given I don't have to be in the same spot every day when doing so, i imagine this will increase my productivity a TON, so at least there's a positive there. Additionally, there's also the off chance this may not change anything for me immediately. But that's what therapy is for - and I'm still very glad I finally started it, because I imagine it will give me the push I need, especially after a good day like this, and I don't want to end it on a negative note because I feel like crap physically.

With that said, I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas or Holiday season - despite my own setbacks as of recent, I had a wonderful one, and I know it's one I'm not going to forget. Take care of yourselves, and here's to the new year! Much love, folks! 💙

It's almost time to ReFresh this passion. See you all soon.