Are You a Retard? A Self-Assessment Guide for the Chronically Clueless 🔥
💀 Breaking News: Some of you are out here living life on tutorial mode, making the dumbest f*cking decisions imaginable, and still wondering why sh*t keeps going wrong.
🚨 Don’t know if you qualify? Let’s check.
1️⃣ Do You Ignore Reality Because It Hurts Your Feelings?
✔ Do you believe the gender wage gap is real? ✔ Do you think “words are violence” but support actual riots? ✔ Do you get offended by jokes but laugh at TikTok “kill all men” trends?
💀 If you answered YES, congrats! You are officially living in delusion and might just be retarded.
2️⃣ Do You Make the Same Dumb F*cking Mistakes Over and Over?
✔ Do you date walking red flags, then cry about “all men/women being trash”? ✔ Do you take financial advice from people who are broker than you? ✔ Do you ignore sound advice because “you don’t like the way it was said”?
🔥 Reality doesn’t give a f*ck about your feelings. You keep touching the hot stove and acting surprised when you get burned.
3️⃣ Do You Believe the Internet Is Real Life?
✔ Do you base your entire personality on Twitter opinions? ✔ Do you think retweets and Tumblr discourse change the world? ✔ Do you engage in online debates like they’re Supreme Court cases?
🚨 If your “activism” consists of yelling into the void online while doing f*ck all in real life, you might be suffering from digital retardation.
4️⃣ Do You Refuse to Take Responsibility for Your Own Life?
✔ Are you always the victim, never the problem? ✔ Do you blame “society” for why you’re broke, out of shape, or single? ✔ Do you demand that other people change instead of improving yourself?
💀 The world isn’t unfair. You’re just dumb and lazy.
5️⃣ Do You Get Angry at Facts?
✔ Do you rage at statistics that don’t fit your worldview? ✔ Do you call everything “problematic” instead of acknowledging reality? ✔ Do you shut down conversations by screaming “bigot, misogynist, incel, racist” instead of making a coherent argument?
🔥 Facts don’t care about your emotions. Cope, seethe, and stay losing.
🔥 Final Verdict: Are You a Retard?
✔ If you got offended reading this, yes. You are. ✔ If you recognized some of this but are willing to fix it, you might have hope. ✔ If you read this and nodded, congrats—you’re one of the few people left with common f*cking sense.
🚀 The good news? You can stop being a retard. The bad news? Most won’t.
🔥 REBLOG if you’ve met one of these f*cking people. 💬 COMMENT if you have real-life retard stories to share. 🚀 FOLLOW if you’re done dealing with idiots.
