i WANT TO MAKE A SENSORY CHEW TOY FOR ORAL STiMMiNG WiTH THE DiCE . ORG LOGO ON iT . . . ! GRANTED , I DON ' T KNOW HOW TO DO THAT AT THE MOMENT , BUT i WiLL FiGURE iT OUT ONE DAY !

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i WANT TO MAKE A SENSORY CHEW TOY FOR ORAL STiMMiNG WiTH THE DiCE . ORG LOGO ON iT . . . ! GRANTED , I DON ' T KNOW HOW TO DO THAT AT THE MOMENT , BUT i WiLL FiGURE iT OUT ONE DAY !

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Hi, im not completely sure why im sending this, i guess i just dont have anyone who i can talk to about this - no one that can really understand atleast.
I dont even know if we've ever talked, but I was in dice and was a pretty active member back in the day. Lately I've gotten an influx of memories and ive been feeling really guilty about it - especially since, because of how young I was (9-10), I was one of the people fully brainwashed into thinking MORTiS was a god, I did everything they said or wanted people to do. I still had a few of the scars they made me do up 1-2 years ago when they fully faded. Hell, sometimes I wonder where they are or even miss them - which i know is a trauma response. I talked to them alot tho untill everything blew up and never really got closure.
Ive never looked online for other ex members untill today and now i guess im reaching out to maybe reconnect with friends i had at the time (which idk if thats possible since idk my user or remember alot from that time), or just finally process everything by talking to people who went through what I did.
Sorry for the bother.
iT ’ S OK , ANON ! i ’ M ALWAYS HERE TO TALK ABT THESE SORTS OF THiNGS AND i NEVER MiND AT ALL ! < 3
i GOT iN AROUND THE SAME AGE ( I got InvIted vIa somebody on Wattpad who was also In the Undertale communIty ) SO i GET iT . THAT WHOLE THiNG GAVE ME WEiRD PSEUDORELiGiOUS PSYCHOSiS THAT SEEPS iNTO EVERYTHiNG IN MY LiFE STiLL . i STiLL KiNDA MiSS THEM , TOO , FOR WHATEVER THAT iS WORTH.
i ALSO BLOCKED OUT A LOT OF MY MEMORiES , SO i ALSO HAVE VERYYYY SCARCE MEMORiES ABOUT THiS . i AM NOT ENTiRELY CERTAiN iF i AM RECiTiNG MY INFORMATiON CORRECTLY , BUT i THiNK MY NAMES BACK THEN MiGHT HAVE BEEN ALEX , PLAGUE , DOCTOR , OR SOMETHiNG ELSE . . . i CANNOT REMEMBER WHAT MY USERNAME MiGHT HAVE BEEN , BUT SOMETHiNG ALONG THOSE LiNES , MAYBE .
NOT SURE iF WE SPOKE BEFORE , A FEW PEOPLE HAVE ALSO CHECKED WiTH ME , BUT MY DMS AND ASKS ARE ALWAYS OPEN iF YOU WANT TO TALK !
I'm figuring this out, help is appreciated.
THE PREViOUS ASK REMiNDED ME OF HOW HAPPY i AM THAT i GOT TO REALiZE HOW MANY SURViVORS WERE STiLL ACTiVE . SO FAR , i ' VE NOTED THAT THERE ARE AT LEAST NiNE - iSH THAT i HAVE SEEN AND THAT MiGHT NOT SEEM LiKE MANY BUT iT iS MORE REASSURiNG THAN ANYTHiNG ELSE HAS BEEN iN REGARDS TO DiCEORG .
i LOVE YOU GUYS VERY MUCH ( PLATONiCALLY , BUT STiLL ! ) AND i AM SO HAPPY THAT WE ALL GOT THiS FAR ! YOU ARE DOiNG GREAT AS YOU ARE , AND i AM SO PROUD OF YOU ! ♥︎
BY THE WAY , THE SYSMATE OF MiNE WHO MADE MY USERBOXES DiD UNFORTUNATELY GET THEiR BLOG TAKEN DOWN BECAUSE OF REPORTS RELATiNG TO THEiR VENTS , SO i WiLL PROBABLY BE REPOSTiNG THE DiCEORG RELATED USERBOXES WiTH MORE VARiATiONS . iF ANYONE WANTS ANY SPECiFiC CHANGES OR REQUESTS , FEEL .L FREE TO ASK OR DM ME <3

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WOULD iT BE TOO HARSH FOR ME TO SAY i HOPE MORTiS DiES BY 2051 OR DURiNG iT ? BECAUSE i DO BUT I DON ' T KNOW iF THAT iS TOO MUCH . ( i don ' t think it is . )
HAVEN ' T DONE MUCH DiGiTAL ART SiNCE i LEFT DiCEORG , BUT —
SAW THE ViD AND iT REMiNDED ME OF MORTiS ( whom i still loathe btw ) SO i KNEW WHAT i HAD TO DO
THE ViD iN QUESTION :
i THiNK i FOUND A DiCE . ORG REPLiCA WiTHOUT ALL THE ACTUAL HARM ! THiNKiNG ABOUT JOiNiNG iT ! MAYBE !