#devilmaycryxbayonetta

Doesn't know whether he should be offend you call his precious handguns cheap toys or be aroused by your voice and the way you sway your body around as if you were some kind of succubus

Definitely used a sort of pick up line after the battle but it will be so bad that the only sound you could hear were crickets. (Dante is trying his best y'all, he's just nervous and messed up)

Surprisingly, the two of you kept meeting up whenever there was trouble brewing between you and the Angel of Paradiso

These meetings lead to a mutual understanding between y'all, building a shocking good friendship that soon blossom into a beautiful romance between a half hybrid and an Umbre Witch

Be prepare to let this man be all over you because he is TOUCH-STRAVED. Will be hugging and cuddling you for hours and won't let go. At least you got yourself a nice teddy bear! (He's the little spoon)

He'll be completely in awe whenever you're fighting. The way your figure danced and the seductive suggestions you make stirs something within him

He will be caught off guard if you're summoning your demon contracts like Gomorrah or Madame Butterfly, because your bodysuit disappeared and a swirl of h/c hair surrounds your naked body, covering your private parts while leaving your gloves, shoes, and watch visible

He got turned on at the mere sight of your almost bare body.

Finds out your bodysuit is just your hair which makes him wonder the logic behind it, in the end, his brain got fried by the complexity of it

Will definitely want to make a demon contract with you just so he can appear whether if it's dealing with a Beloved and Fortuna or just having smexy time with you

Loves dancing with you! You matched his flamboyant, outgoing personality and style. Hell, y'all be dancing while fighting Grace and Glory along with some demons like Abyss and a Queen Empusa (Like when Cereza summoned Rodin and they danced)

The two of you will definitely trade weapons. You'll use Cerburus while he'll use Shuraba

Will give you a ride on his motorcycle, Cavaliere and have a joy ride and showing off the places and scenery Redgrave has to offer

Expect the dates to somewhat be cheap but filled with love and care put into it. On your first date, he found a nice, peaceful scenery by the woods and order pizza with two bottles of red wine

His bills will sometimes be pay by you because you be making that money like that (We love a girl boss 🤞). He always (50/50 chance) return the favor one way or another

It's surprising seeing someone taller than him as he stands at 190 cm but he LOVES it. He's infatuated with you, always staring up at you and slipping a few glimpse at your chest while rubbing the stubbles on his chin. (Loses his mind when you dominant him and-, Dante...why are you on your knees..?)

Honestly, it still fathoms him how he managed to pull you but is very grateful for you. Loves you to death and will do anything you ask!

♤ Vergil Sparda ♤

Vergil felt challenged at the mere sight of you. Something was immensely off about your aura...

The first meeting was probably at a café shop that was known for its good tea and numerous books. The moment you step foot into the café was the moment Vergil took his eyes off of his poetry book

The long strides you made, swinging your hips to the side and sauntered with confidence just added more to his suspension (He's already fallen under your spell, it's love he's feeling)

Somehow, your boisterous flare sparked and left a mark within his cold heart...He didn't know what happen but the two of y'all were chatting passionately about poetry. 'What were you? A witch or something?', he ponders, maintaining that seldom expression as he scrutinizes you

Ironically enough, he was right. He found out when you displayed such ferocious strength against your battle with two Ardors (He just sat there, watching you tossed and used wicked weave on the red armor angels)

Just seeing you battle made him motivated to display his strength and power in front of you

He will join your battle and utilize Yamato, slicing and dicing Gracious and Glorious, tearing down the tricky angels with great accuracy (These angels are known for being quite challenging)

He will definitely interfere with your battles; instead of you fighting them, he'll be the one fighting them. Don't bother trying to argue with him about it, he's already taken down five Harmony and the Fearless, Fairness duo

The only reason he's doing it is to display his extraordinary power, to prove that he's truly the Dark Knight and some mere angels will not make a fool out of Sparda's kin

Another reason is because of demon traditions. Being in the Underworld for a long time and dedicating his time in studying his demon origins, he found out a common courting practice conducted in hell was for demons to fight and show off their strength to their desired mate in hopes of winning them over

Looks like his courting technique help him as he managed to pull the Umbre Witch

The deep navy blue blade came in contact with the black scabbard, returning safely to its cozy home. His back faced the angels once he landed on the gravel ground. Screams of Garcious and Glorious echoed the arena, filling the quietness with screeches; a blinding light emerged from them as they combusted into halos and feathers.

"How utterly weak. They serve as servants and protecters of humanity yet they hardly done anything to me. Foolish angels", the kin of Sparda remove his fingerless glove off the tsukamaki. Soft giggles escaped from behind him. Turning his head a bit, he was greeted with a tall witch, hands on their hips as their gaze stared down at his blue eyes. "Vergil, you were the one to challenged them. My, are you trying to court me?", you mused, a smirk started to etched on your face. The ex Demon King of Hell didn't answer you, but the silence gave you an answer.

Amazed, you sauntered towards him and leaned down to his height. You whispered something to his ear and cat walked away, leaving Vergil alone with his cheeks dusted in the lightest yet soft hue of pink.

Since then, the two of you been taking on angels and occasionally demons along your journal. Vergil claims he wanted to know about the angel species hence to why he is traveling with you (Y'all are dating, he's just too..., stubborn to admit he wants to be by your side)

Will document the various angels he encounters in a small journal you gifted him. Watch him become Luka's father in a bit

Oh? You're reciting something in Enochian? Be expected to see him reading old, ancient books regarding that language. He will ask demand you to teach him the language. (He's constantly studying and practicing everyday!)

When you perform a torture attack, he'll be impressed as it represents a sort of human torture devices from human history. He'll be watching you as you do a torture attack while displaying your seductive, arousing gestures. Very interested in it and will write about it in his small journal

Oh boy, when you perform a demon summoning and your "clothes" vanished, he will be stun. He, being the gentleman he is, will try to cover your (almost) bare body with his blue coat. Like as soon as you do your summoning, a blue coat is draped around your shoulders, shielding your naked body and curves from any prying eyes. (The only eyes that'll be looking at your figure is Vergil's as he's just standing there with his arms crossed, staring at you with his normal stoic expression)

Demands you to make a demon contact with him to show people your his and he's yours. He'll be proud if you summon him, gladly fight for you but won't outright say it. Just knowing that your his "mate" (his demon urges is skyrocketing rn) makes him feel blessed and content; he just claims you as his just like his books and katana (HA! Take that Dante!)

Dates will be either be in a quiet place away from humans or in a café. If he's being fancy enough, he'll take you to an expensive restaurant

Sparing and relaxation will be the highlights of yall's quality time toghter! Just be prepare because Vergil won't go easy on you. He knows you're powerful so why should he hold back? He wants to be at an equal level with you

Wanna see him flustered? Activate your Witch Time during your sparring and press various kisses on him. The best part is, he can feel your lips all over his face. There you go! Now you have the Dark Slayer glancing away from you, rosy pink dusted his cheeks accompanying him with red lipstick you imprinted on his face

Your height difference clearly made the blue demon felt like he was being challenged. You being taller than him? Haha, as if that'll stop him for being the dominant one in this relationship. He needs to uphold his infamous status, he won't be submissive (Okay...maybe sometimes if he's feeling strangely friendly)

◇ Nero Sparda ◇

Nero didn't really care about you when you first appeared in the church; he was just laying back, jamming to his music as he dazed off

Although, when you approached him, your tall stature and nun outfit seemingly cause him to snap out of his trance

Your sultry yet angelic voice definitely caught his attention as he can't seem to avert his gaze away from you

Will act like you didn't affect him in a way but its so obvious that the anti-social, hot-headed teen was admiring you, practically following you like a lost puppy

Whenever he's helping you with whatever, he'll try to start up some conversation like, "Where are you from?" Or "Why are you a nun here on this nobody island ?" Of course he received the same answer, "Quite the curious type lil pup? Next time dear". (He's pissed off you called him a pup but doesn't expressed his anger towards you)

Somehow, he's been spending more time with you without realizing it. From helping you carry stuff to socializing with you

One night, you and him were at the isolated parts of the town, gathering supplies The Order needed. What started off as a peaceful night shifted drastically to a slightly noisy one as some petty angels decided to ruin yall's quality time

Originally, Nero thought they were demons but with the bright light, angelic sounds, and them descending down with grace, he immediately knew they were angels. 'Wait, angels existed? Why are they coming towards us? Is our time up?', will probably be the thoughts circulating in his head. Oh Nero, if you knew they weren't coming towards you, rather a particular nun standing next to you

When he saw their weapons, his first instincts was to protect you, pull out Blue Rose, and shoot warning shots at them. Before he could, your voice rang out in your normal tone as if you weren't bother by their appearance. 'Were nuns this comfortable when they come face to face with servants of God?'.

One minute you were standing next to him, the next you were in the air, grabbing their legs and tossing them around like a rag doll. He didn't know what to do: should he help you or stay in place? Wait a minute...WHY ARE YOU FIGHTING THEM!?

He tried to call you but couldn't help but admired the way your form moves in the air; it was a sight for sore eyes. But he snaps out of it and rushes in to assist you

Sounds of shearing caught his ears which made him averted his gaze towards you. His eyes widened when he realized your white, pristine outfit ripping with every strike the Affinities launched towards you; it didn't helped that you were moaning

His face is bright red, eyes gawking at your figure. He thought nuns were classy, religious but nah, here you were being seductive and moaning with no shame at all. (He's a hormonal teenage y'all bare with him plz; his thoughts about you being the ideal nun was flushed down the drain)

Once your clothes were torn, you pulled them off, standing naked in view. Luckily (or not) a shadow casted over you before your hair latched itself on your body, turning into your tight bodysuit. At least you have some clothes on. And here you go fighting angels as if it was the most casual thing ever

Blood splattered on the cold cobblestone pavement. Gunshots rang throughout the area, followed with some shrieks and cries. The Umbre Witch sent a kick towards an Affinity, weaving about while projecting bullets towards the other enemies. The Holy Knight assisted the witch, striking and plunging angels below him with his brilliant revolver. The two didn't made much conversation, only focusing on their targets in front of them. Although, one of them breaks the tense atmosphere

"You should use that arm of yours, pup. It'll be more effective on them", they mentioned, glancing at the Devil hunter. Nero scoffed, covering his abnormal right arm futher in his cast as he delivered bullets and kicks to the angelic targets.

"Don't come talking about that when we're dealing with these what angels. Why are they here?! Why are you so calm?! What are you?!", he barked questions after questions, clearly being in his hot-tempered state. Giggles erupted from your lips. "Be patient puppy". "I'M NOT A PUPPY!".

After your small battles with the Affinities, Nero begin to demand answers about what the hell was all of this. So, you ended up telling him everything which seemed to calm him a bit

After the whole ordeal, angels will be an occasional thing in his life now all thanks to you! But these battles with them brought you two closer. I guess shredding bloodshed on angelic beings can stimulate a relationship

You manged to convince him to accept his demon arm which he gladly embraced! You help him with his abilities and even gave him advices on how he can perfect it

Sparring will be a common thing between y'all! The two of you will sneaked off into the woods and practice for a while until Nero is tired out

Nero finally court you after the incident between a red demon, the Order, and their attempts to take over the world! (Dante, Lady, and Trish were just standing there as they watch the stubborn yet now bashful teen express his love to you, smiling at his sudden change in behavior)

He'll be asking all sorts of question regarding your witch origins. From your watch to demon summonings and abilities. If he had such features of a dog, his tail will be rapidly wagging as his ears perked up in interest

Expect to receive gifts from him! He just wants to spoiled you even though he knows you have the money to spoil yourself and him

Sneaking off will be a common thing between y'all. Either you will be ditching Luka or him stepping away his Holy Knight duties and quickening his missions. Sigh...such young love

Common dates will be sauntering around the town, visiting shops and cafés or it'll be in the woods, the two of you enjoying nature and the tranquil atmosphere

When he got his haircut and out grew his teen face, he thought he wouldn't get tease by you anymore. Unfortunately, his new appearance made you tease him more. You still called him a puppy which he is pissed at but couldn't help but love that silly nickname you persistent on keeping

He will take you on his missions with demons and explored new areas with you, taking your hand gently and gesturing you around the foreign area

♧ V ♧

He thought you were an angel in his eyes....ironic enough, you were the opposite of that

He woke up in your apartment, confusion written all over his face as a rather large yet soft blanket covered his body

When he finally sat up, memories surfaced up from last night; realizing that he passed out due to overworking himself with that Nidhogg suddenly popping out of nowhere

"Ah, you're finally awake", a voice called out to him, making him direct his gaze to where that voice was. There you were, sitting on a chair with...Shadow laying against your chair with Griffon sitting on your table.

"V, thank goodness you're awake! This crazy minx tried to cook me!", the black hawk squawked, pointing his wing at you. "Decitful hag!", he exclaimed. A smirk tugged your lips. "Such a foul mouth you have, perhaps I should punish you, how about feeding you to my little pets hm? Or having all those feathers of yours pluck out", a dangerous glint shimmered in your eyes, making the demon shut up quickly. Grumbling underneath his breath, he swiftly flew over to his owner and perched on his shoulder.

The man glanced around the apartment, taking in everything before shifting his gaze back to you. "Where am I?", he asked. "You're in my apartment, dear. Found you resting along the cold dirt peacefully", you answered, standing up from you seat which caused the cat demon to opened her eyes. V couldn't help but stare at you with keen interest; you had a weird aura surrounding you, and you weren't faze by the two demon familiars. Before he could say nothing else, a finger was placed on his lips. "Save the chit-chat for later and drink this", you offer him a glass of water. Griffon scoffed at you while Shadow came sauntering towards you, rubbing her head towards your leg. Who are you?

From there, conversations occured ranging from who you were to somehow poetry much to Griffon's annoyance. Although, all he receives from you was vague and vise versa (Ah don't we love the mysterious types)

Weirdly enough, the two of y'all become friends because of your mysterious (attractive) behaviors and somehow, you mingled your way into his life

V was wondering why you weren't so perplexed at his demon companions, weren't you human as well? Surely you'll be afraid of these abnormal creatures. And yet here you were petting Shadow's head and grooming Griffon's feathers (Which was revolutionary)

Sooner than later he acquired his answer when he came face with a...few Joys. Griffon and Shadow emerged out, beginning to attack them without V's commands. V was in utter shock, these were angelic beings? Have they came to atone him for his sins on behalf of his demon half? (Nah, they just scented a familiar aura on him from a certain witch)

Immediately, a wide curled ribbon of metal came whizzing towards him. Before he could call Shadow, a dark rose gold barrel of a gun collided against the metal ribbon. "You certainly won't get a man if you're throwing attacks at him", V's eyes widened when he heard your voice. Turning his head behind him, he noticed your stature looming over him

Surely enough, the Joy begin to thrashed the whip around, aiming at you relentlessly. You dodged it effortlessly, performing Witch Time and sending Wicked Weave towards the feminine being. As soon as V blinked, the being groaned loudly before bursting into a bright beam of light, blinding him which made him raise his arm over his eyes

Once the Joys were finally dealt with, halos and feathers scattered over the grass. Soon enough, both Griffon and Shadow returned to V's side. Shadow looked like she was ready to pounce on you while Griffon raise his wings, ready to sent a Blockade attack at you. "I knew it! You wicked bitch!", Griffon squawked which made you amused. "Perhaps I should feed you to Gomorrah. He'll be thrilled trying something new rather than souls and angels", your smile become a dangerous smirk. "Oh you!-".

V managed to calm the situation down, easing his familiars and keeping you at a safe distance from you. He finally inquired about what you were but you gave him a smile. You crouched down, placing your gloved hand over your maroon lipstick lips and blow a kiss towards him...or so it seems. Trio of heart projectiles blew passed him (one landed on his cheek) and shattered the angelic seal behind them, thus opening a small portal to Inferno. "Ask your little pets, it seems I must be off my way", you explained before sauntering away and disappearing

V placed a hand on his cheek, confusion etched his face as he stood there, collecting his thoughts. Slowly, he removed his palm, placing it down to his side; however, a light shade of pink dusted his pale cheeks

Brushing that thought away, he averted his attention back on his familiars. "What was she talking about?", his cool, calm voice reached them. Griffon sighed but reluctantly explained to him that you were an Umbre Witch

Hm? A witch that has demon contracts? So you were like him in a way in some sorts. You were an enticing person while he was a fragile human half of his original self

Nonetheless, he felt a connection between you

After this meeting, he ended up visiting you at your apartment one day. Book in hand, reading and waiting for you to open the door

You revealing your true identity left an impression on V. He knew you were a stunning person, but now? His admiration he had for you deepened immensely

These visits became more frequent and it looks like his pets became very comfortable around you. Griffon kept squawking at you, trying to find a comeback at your passive aggressive threats; Shadow is always by your side, demanding some pats and attention like some house cat

You somehow ended up filling your bookshelves with poetry V recommended for you

Eventually, your relationship with him sparked up into the next level: boyfriend & girlfriend

Expected this man to be his mysterious, quiet self. He's not that opened up but will sometimes alluded to stuff about him and his past like that time he mentioned that roses was his mother's favorite flowers

The next day he was greeted with bundles of roses and a small note.

Dear V,

Roses are beautiful creations, it represents love and passion but it also means commitment, respect, admiration, and harmony. Your mother must've been a brilliant rose

Love, Your Favorite Witch

(There's a lipstick mark on the small envelope)

With each word he read, his lips tugged into a smile. It was a heart felt message from you which made him content. He kept that letter in his book, always rereading it whenever he's far away from you

You will accompanied him whenever he's venturing somewhere that in invasive with demons and possible angels lurking around. (Griffon complains about it but enjoys your witty remarks)

When V summoned Nightmare, you were taken back by his white hair appearing, getting rid of every strand of jet black. When the battle is done, you're just running your hand through his hair which soothe him greatly

Sometimes when his limbs gives up on him, you just carry him around as if he weighs like a pillow of feathers. You prefer carrying him bridal style, enjoying him against your body and stare at your chest. (V is trying his best not to look at them)

"Love and harmony combine, And round our souls entwine. While thy branches mix with mine, and our roots together join. Joys upon our branches sit, chirping loud and singing sweet; like gentle streams beneath our feet, innocence and virtue meet", V recited the printed words in that brown-gold, embroidered book. He smiled, before turning the page.

"Alright lover boy, cut it out! If you think slashing and decimating angels in horrific ways is innocent and virtue, THEN YOU'RE DELUSIONAL!", Griffon yells. In the distance, you summoned a large chainsaw and cleave through a Hamrony. Blood sprayed everywhere before exploding into a pool of blood. "She's truly one of a kind", V smiled at you

Cuddles will be a common thing as you'll drag him to bed so he can get some sleep; his body desperately needs it. You'll trace his tattoos with slow strokes with a hint of suggestion into them

V cherished every moment he has with you because he knows this body of his will crumble away if he doesn't come face with his demon half; he just hopes you'll understand this revelation and still love him even when he merged with Urizen, turning back into Vergil

¤《 Urizen 》¤

Urizen despise you at first glance. There standing in all of glory was you with your hands on your hips

You sauntered towards him without a care in the world. You're emulate confidence and flamboyance with just your walk. Why wasn't a mere human like you crumbling to their knees at the sight of him?

You had the audacity to ask him if he seen a certain platinum witch with a coy smile. Your answer was received with a Qliphoth root launched towards you at ridiculous speed; fortunately, you did a back flip, activating your Witch Time

"Is that the way you treat woman? No wonder why you can't get none", you passively insulted him, eyes meeting his face. You scanned him up and down, shamelessly checking him out. "Foolish woman, how dare you stand against a king", he glares down, teeth baring at you. An 'o' shaped form on your lips, making you placed your gloved hand over your lips. A smirk etched across your face. "On second thought..., perhaps you have a way of swaying women", you swirled your Scarborough Fairs in your hands. "Let's dance, baby! Hope you're ready for a bloody coronation!", you winked at the demon king.

The battle continued for a while without no interruption. The both of you kept up with each other; you dodging the pillars of blue flames beneath you while that red crystal counter all of your Wicked Weave and bullets. Eventually, you realized that you're still looking for your Umbre sister

With a final attack, you swiftly perform some backflips to distance yourself from him. "Sorry big boy, but a friend is waiting for me", you placed your hands on your hips. A scorn growl erupted from the king. "You dare walk away from this skirmish. I'll have your head as compensation", his claw scratched his throne as the other remained on his cheek. You laughed at his declaration. "Is that the way you show people you're interested in them? Don't worry, I'll leave a parting gift", with that, you blew a kiss at him, winking before disappearing from his imposing domian

The mystery surrounding you, a human left him feeling a myriad of emotions: bloodlust, anger, and loathing coursed his demon blood, but wonder and a dash of aroused stirred his heart

You kept your end of your promise and showed up again after a week or so later. "How peculiar. Do you wish to yield and relinquish your fate, Umbre Witch?", he inquired, multiple eyes piercing down at you. "No I just missed you that's all", it seems like your answer earn a quiet sneer from him

Somehow, some way, Urizen didn't attack you; rather he observed you, scrutinized your stature and style. Tight bodysuit, odd guns strapped to your heels, a watch on the opening gape of your chest. Such a weird outfit a human wore. "Hm? My eyes are up here big shot", you called out

Heels clicked the miscolored root ground as small butterflies flew from you. You stand in front of him, hands on hips as you stared up at him. Dear, he is massive

Small talks emerged with you starting off first with Urizen sometimes replying or just listening to you. These random meetings somehow but amusing lead to a mutual bond between you: an alluring witch and the new Demon King

Urizen started to see you less as a weak human and more of a human who is stronger if not powerful than all of humanity. Of course his pride and position refused to acknowledge that you might have the chance to defeat him

These talks made Urizen understand or get a good idea of what emotions are. Happiness, sadness, frustration, pesky human emotions. Yet it seemed he may have been too keen on two things: admiration and curiosity. It's a weird feeling and he experienced it whenever he's by you. Soon, that admiration and curiosity led to love

He hated it; these galling sensations makes you weak. He refused to succumb to such disease. He was the Demon King, he needs power, not love. But he couldn't help but feel his demon blood coursing through his veins about the idea of having you as his mate

Thats the solution. In order to satisfy his infatuation for you and his power hungry desire, why not make you his mate? It's a demon's instinct to display ferocious power to a desired mate and court them, thus making them there's

One day, he abruptly cut off your words and command ask you to be his mate. If you disagree then he shall keep you here forever until you comply. Fortunately for him, you agreed but mentioned to tone down his tone when it came to demon customs which earned you a huff

This demon expects you to be by his side 24/7. You're going to be his queen after all, so why would you want to venture out of this humble domain and into what's left of Red Grave?

A queen must need a throne next to the king right? That could be improvise...but of course this is Urizen we are talking about. He'll have you sitting on his lap, more like his thick rooted layer thigh

He'll make sure you won't fall off his thigh with the help of Qliphoth roots. Just to be clear it'll be nearly impossible to get off his thigh. If you however wanna get off of him, he'll be a stubborn ass and refused to let you leave

The height difference is immensely noticeable. You stand at 8 feet while he's like 20 feet at best (I saw someone said he's like 20 feet and I'm going with that bc there's no sources confirming his height)

Performing affection such as hugs, kisses, and even sex is difficult because you know, he's enormous but y'all found a way to work it out. You'll kiss his rooted skin, caressing his skin which was surprisingly soothing to him. He won't admit it but he enjoys you peppering his cheek with kisses. Blowing a kiss and even dancing suggestively deepens his desire for you

He'll return the favor by picking you up and placing you in his palm, carefully and delicately brushing your face and hair with his long claw. Qliphoth roots will find its way to your body and caressed your body (you can take it as affectionate or....that way. Btw he could feel your curves and stuff!) He'll offer you heads of demons and even some halos of angels if their unfortunate souls found their way in his domain

He knew you were an Umbre Witch as soon as he saw you. You reeked of different, powerful demons that are well known in Inferno

He couldn't help but be annoyed and jealous that your soul was meant for them, not him. He wanted you to rely on him instead of your demon companions. But since its a contract, he couldn't break it no matter what. Yes, the Demon King couldn't interfere with demon contracts which greatly irritated him

Instead of fussing over it, he decided to display his extraordinary power and strength in front of you whenever opponents challenged him. He'll toy with them while delivering attacks to them. In his eyes, you'll be more willing to accept him more as his mate

Admires you whenever you demonstrated your power, although his demon instincts are telling him to make you rely on him instead of your power and abilities. He just wants you to be his submissive mate but even he knows that won't happen

He is determined to rule the world with you by his side, his pretty queen standing next to him. The perfect ideal dream will be fulfilled as soon as he consumed the Qliphoth Fruit. You shall be superior against every being and produce heirs to his throne (But that could only happen in another timeline though)

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

Finally I'm done! Hope y'all enjoy this! Yes V's thing is long, I'm almost done with DMC 5 and this is my way of coping. I'm fine y'all

(I'm not).