evening, losers.

the allure of masquerade balls is perhaps best enshrined in lloyd webber’s phantom of the opera - i see no reason why the ability to “fool any friend who ever knew you” wouldn’t appeal to you. you get to be exactly who you want for a night; free of the burdens of whatever is normally weighing you down. and while that might certainly be the case with most people, you lot have an added obstacle standing in the way between you and total anonymity; me. 

allow me to tell you a story. in no way as fictional as phantom of the opera, but on every plane just as theatrical. imagine the scene: 30th September 2017. yes, that night. it’s nothing short of ironic, if you ask me, that minutes before jennie’s untimely death new life was conceived in a supply closet. or was it a coat room? ah, it doesn’t matter. if you really want the exact geographical location - all you have to do is ask nora & ollie. 

and before you ask; no, there’s no royal baby in the works. anymore, that is. it was all dealt with in silence ; after all, why would she want anyone to know? 

why would i post this, you say?  i’ll be brief: you may think you’re too important for me to ruin, but no one is out of my reach. 

until we speak again,

-j

depends on who is annoying me the most on any given day. but don’t worry, your turn will come, eventually.

well, if there is one thing i know, it’s that none of you are without fault. but allow me to try to categorise you nonetheless.

looks like a cinnamon roll, is a cinnamon roll - @celestexs @rosexgallagherlooks like a cinnamon roll but would actually murder you - @sabrivcs looks like they would murder you, is a cinnamon roll - @lysslxriclooks like they would murder you, would actually murder you - @tcvias @hcwthcrne

i’m onto you, kids.