Name: “Name? S’just Kunio. …Shit, that’s not gonna fly, is it…? Fine, Fuunji. Kunio Fuunji.”  Age:  “Eighteen. …Look; I’m legal, yeah? It’s fine.” Position desired: “Heard you guys got openings for Investiagators. The case-by-case type, yeah? I’m in.” Previous experience & qualifications: “Listen, I wasn’t even gonna try for Detective. I know that’s a hard refusal without a badge, and the red guy looks too intense to be flexible on it. And I ain’t had any official position before, either. But let me give it to you straight: if you’re looking for someone who’s got more than his share of licks beating the streets looking to track down a lead, putting his neck on the line against thugs, crooks and killers, I’m your guy. I’m confident in that.”

“…Heard rumblings you guys don’t settle for half-measures and only want the truth. I respect that. I can be pretty abrasive, but I think I can be a team player with that kinda ideal.” Opinion on comic sans: “…Ain’t that usually for the Sunday funnies? Ah, whatever; no skin off my nose; you do you.”

“Hmm? I thought somebody else was answering the investigations applications- No matter, I will handle this.”

Age: Twenty, why does it matter?

Position desired: Detective (or one rank above whatever Near is)

Previous experience & qualifications: You’ve probably heard of me, I was on the news for blowing up a building. This is just one example of how far I would go to solve a case. Hire me.

Opinion on comic sans: I heard Near likes it so I hate it.

“You kids sure are weird about giving out your names...” And they’re weird names at that. 

“Also, um...I’m not...like, trying to tell you how to live your life, or whatever, but if you hate this Near kid so much are you sure you want to be working here?”

In addition to that, what the actual fuck was that about the qualifications and experience??

Age: 20-ish? (I traveled a lot and lost track of my birthday and we went into this magic ball where time passed by faster so things might have gotten weird)

Position desired: Detective (or a Magician if you need those more I don’t know)

Previous qualifications and experience: I was part of a detective duo with my friend Nott and we investigated all sorts of spooky stuff like a frog demon who was turning people into zombies and portals that were being opened into the Abyss, and we solved all those cases SUPER well.  I’ve also got all kinds of spells but I guess technically most of them are taken away for now.  I can only do healing magic right now but eventually I’ll be able to use a spell that forces people to tell the truth and one that can let me scry on people based on physical evidence to find where they are and what they’re doing which I think would be really super invaluable for solving crimes!  I know that being able to do them right now would probably be better but I’m still a really good detective without those spells and I’ll be even better when I get them!  So you should probably hire me so you have me around for when I can do all that stuff again.

Opinion on comic sans: I don’t know what that is but it has the word comic in it so it sounds fun!

“Sorry, what? You solved what? You can use what???? What the fuck??? What the fu--”

Date gets the odd ones, doesn’t he. It seems everyone applying to be a detective at the agency is 50 levels of hardcore. 

Oh thank god this child just wants to be an intern.

“Okay, well...I now know what comic sans is, so thank you for that. I...don’t know why it’s a question on our job application or why I’m answering these but I’d be glad to have another investigations intern. We have quite a few detectives, so I’m sure you’ll learn a lot from...all of us. Welcome to the agency, Haruka.”

Age: Eighteen

Position desired: Detective

Previous experience & qualifications: I have extensive detective experience, having been trained to solve cases since I was a very young child. Where I come from, I have a reputation as the world's greatest detective, having even solved a case that the last person to hold that title died attempting to solve. I don't usually work with law enforcement directly and will only take on cases I think will be fun or exciting but I will most assuredly be an asset nonetheless.

Opinion on comic sans: I think it looks inviting, if a little childish.