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I'm sick of being told that, "God will catch you if you fall and you need to do your part."

What the fuck will praying do?! I need help with my confidence, I don't need this wizard guy, I don't need him. I need some one to help me with my anger, my confidence, my stress and to help make me a greater person than I ever was.

I want to say all of this, but my therapist is guess what? Christian, I can't tell him how i feel about this, I can't even tell him that i'm bisexual. It makes me want to punch someone.

If God was real, then why am I like this?! Why are you saying that, "Pray for forgiveness and to have strength."

Now as for Jesus, I do believe in him but only as a figure who had came to help the people who were too weak to protect themselves. Not as this guy that was the "son" of God.

There are some of you that are thinking, "well then why don't you say anything about this?"

Well I will tell you why, it's because I don't want to hurt my mom's side of the family because most of them go to church and are very Christian. 

At times because of my family I just wish that I could just die so I don't have to tell my mom that I am bisexual and I don't like being told things about "God".

Well, this is awkward.

First day of the classes. Different people, different faces in different subjects. It's our first time to encounter this because for our first two terms, we are in a block: meaning, we see the same people, same faces on same subjects (since May to December). 

My first subject is Physical Education (FTDANCE). Obviously, we are required to dance in this subject. Our professor is handsome tho lol. He will teach swing and tsatsa for the entire term. This subject is really ridiculous because we already had our partners and danced with hands holding each other....... How could you hold someone you just met or saw for not less than an hour?? How?? Well, the good thing is, my classmates in this subject are friendly and approachable. My partner is somehow good-looking tho hihi (PLS) and kind.

Break. This is probably one of the highlights of my day. I spent it, of course, with my original blockmates/college friends!! We talked about how our first subject went, if there are hotties on that subject, if the prof is hot, if this subject is boring.... etc.

Ate my lunch before my second subject, Biology (SCIMATB). I don't know anyone besides Gael. We haven't met our prof yet but the department chair oriented us with the course. WHAT IS ZZZZZ SLEEPY

40-minute break. I did not eat but I spent it talking, again, with my original blockmates/college friends. 

Third subject, Sociology (INTSOCI). Well, our prof ditched us. It was a free cut and when someone entered the room to announce that it was free cut, she also said that our prof is a Ms. which is supposed to be a Mr. as written in our Enrollment Assessment Form and as chosen by us. BUT THE PROFS ARE RESHUFFLED. Great. -_-

I did not immediately go home after the free cut was announced. I claimed my O.R. on the accounting office as a proof of enrollment with Eunice, Romelie and Gael. We really talked a lot of things and I could say that I really missed them.

Well, as for the main highlight of my day (malandi), Ryan picked me up at school and went to our, of course, favorite tambayan, Camella Finds. I missed this.We ate and talked and talked and flirt lol.

I went home at 6pm and rested. First day of school.... No requirements, yet I'm already tired.