#dearpapa

Today’s the 9th day since you left us, Pa. Still feels like yesterday though. I hope you’re okay wherever you are.

Hi pa, Happy Birthday.. I've been missing you a lot lately. Sobra to the point na bigla bigla na lang ako nagkakaron ng emotional breakdown hanggang sa makakatulugan ko na lang yung pag-iyak. I always have this thought na pano kaya kung nandito ka pa? Pano kung kasama ka pa namin up until now? I'm certainly sure my life would be different if you're still around. I just wish I can turn back time, yung tipong makakapag spend pa ko ng maraming memories with you. I was just 6 when you passed and to be honest our memories are somewhat blurry. Natatandaan ko lang, lagi tayong tumatakas para mag jollibee lang somewhere without mama and ate's permission. Lagi mo kong inuuwian ng "Orange Juice" kapag galing kang trabaho. Ako lagi yung nagtatanggal ng socks and shoes mo kasi lagi kang pagod pag uuwi and gusto mo lang nakaupo na pag dating sa bahay. Isa lang yung malinaw sakin pa, the night that you have to be admitted sa st. Lukes and you gotta say goodbye to me kasi shempre bawal naman ako sa hospital. Sabi mo kasi nung tinanong kita kung san ka pupunta, magpapagaling ka lang sa hospital and you promised me that you will be back. I waited, But you didn't. From that day forward, I don't believe in promises anymore. Especially those who keep on saying they won't leave me. And guess what? They did. Hindi naman ako galit sayo pa pero may mga oras lang talagang hinihintay pa rin kita. Losing you was the most painful heartbreak I ever had. Kaya siguro after all the hearbreaks I've been through kinakaya ko pa din, kasi yung mawala ka sakin yun na yung pinaka-masakit. I'm sorry pa if im such a failure but I'm still trying my best to keep the promise I made. That's the only thing that keeps me going. Gustong gusto ko na magpahinga pa. Sobrang pagod na po ako. Nauubusan na ko ng courage para mabuhay pa pero pag naalala ko si mama, hindi ko naman siya maiwan. Sobrang lungkot ng buhay ko pa. Sobrang tagal ko ng nagtitiis at sobrang tagal ko ng nilalabanan to pero hanggang ngayon stuck pa din ako. I'm so afraid to seek help kasi iniisip lang nila madrama lang ako or I'm just being emotional. Sana alam lang nila na its more than that. I'm just so tired. At miss na miss na kita. Yung mga oras na'to, gusto lang kita mayakap ng mahigpit pero alam ko naman na hindi pwede. I just wanna let you know that I love you so much. See you soon. Love, Bunso.

Dear Father, 2020

Papa I'm writing to you not because it's an annual celebration for fathers but because you owe to know how much I love you. I was blessed to have him as my father. He may not be perfect but he has certain qualities that make him stand out. thank you for the things you taught me I got up seen may childhood and papa you are my ideal person of my life. He is my real hero and my best friend ever. He always helps me a lot in my any difficulty. Yet you just type dad that prevent us from the bad habits which are just destroy our lives. You've always been there for me even if you don't say too many words unlike mom. He is the person who helps me a lot in getting prepared for the school, getting rise of the bed and getting my home work done well. Your current achievements makes me very proud of you. I can still remember how you throw jokes just to make us laugh and that's something we all watch a movie that can be bonding that worth to be remembered for a lifetime. Sorry if hard those we head for those not following us orders of family ties and just have to forgive that brother  to act as the bad life which combined so that the path. Papa that can you forgive my brother for many things in all he made her life. That papa thank you for the all many things you than for me i love u papa.

11/14Happy Birthday 💜 #dearpapa #mylove #睡覺比賽 https://www.instagram.com/p/BqJiWJ8h9xD/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=ng612bbwk0iz