#deardev0teddelicate

"You'll take Ben's room," Dani pointed to the room on the left, "we'll be across the hall. Now, I'm giving y'all a lot of trust here. My brother would rather send y'all off to fend for yourselves or put a bullet in your heads, so don't do anything stupid." She turned on her heel, making her way to the room her and Ben were staying in. As she reached the doorway, she tossed her head over her shoulder to give the brothers one last warning. "Do not mistake my generosity for weakness. I'm a more accurate shot than Ben is." 

And with that she left them standing in the darkness of the hallway, candle in her hand, taking the only light left with her. For a brief moment, Joel and Tommy just stood there, debating in their heads if they really should be running by now. The kindness Dani had offered them after they broke in, tied them up and hurt Ben was…odd to say the least, and made Joel suspicious of her intentions. All he could wonder was what she was playing at; what her grand scheme was. 

"Should we stay?" Tommy asked lowly, voicing Joel's very thoughts. He looked at his brother wearily, before gesturing him to follow into the room. He shut the door with a quiet snick, and turned to Tommy. 

"Not sure. I don't know what their idea of 'stupid' is. M'worried that leavin' before the morning would be seen as ungrateful or somethin'," Joel muttered, pausing to think, before shaking his head with finality. "We treat it like we're out there," he gestured with his head to the window. "I'll take the first shift, you take the second. We'll get up in the morning, express our gratitude and keep on movin'." 

Tommy nodded, putting his pack down next to the bed before climbing on top of the covers. Joel set his own pack down next to Tommy's, grabbed his gun, and sat in the wooden chair by the door. Joel sighed, his bones releasing bouts of tension that had built up in the last few hours.

Despite not knowing what Dani's intensions were, he was appreciative of her kindness. She had every right to fight back, kick them out—hell—even kill them right then and there. But she didn't. She made the whole situation, which should've been an utter shit show, a, surprisingly, decent interaction. And what's more, she stuck up for them when her brother doubted her. It took guts to stand ground like that, and Joel had to admit that it impressed him, even though the trait itself was a necessity in this world. 

Joel sat in the shadows, listening to Tommy's snores—the fucker still fell asleep quicker than what should've been possible, especially in an apocalypse—and the creaking of the house in the cold wind. 

The house was well built, he had taken note of the structure during their dinner. Probably went up in the 1920s give or take. It had definitely received repairs and updates over the years, some more cosmetic than functional, but the foundation was solid, and the insulation still held itself up. The style of the house was conflicting, but still somewhat cohesive. He noticed that the fireplace seemed original, but the kitchen was more reminiscent of the 90s. Even the room he was in now—Ben's—was stuck in the 2000s. Tony Hawk and Eminem posters lined the walls, stacks of CDs (bought and burned) were everywhere. 

The house was a time capsule of all that was before. Before cordyceps, before the Outbreak. 

The longer Joel sat, the more relaxed he became. He almost felt like he was just in a neighbor's home, rather than a stranger's. He took in the details of his surroundings, details he never would have had to entertain him if they hadn't found the place. And one detail in particular had caught his eye. 

Just above Joel's line of sight was a bulletin board above the desk. Pinned in the center was an acceptance letter to the University of Alabama, surrounded by pictures of a football team in black and gold uniforms. As Joel looked closer, he saw a younger Ben, kneeling down on the bottom row, three from the end. There were also a few pictures of just Ben in the very same uniform, some holding a football in one arm and some with a helmet obscuring his rounded-childlike face. 

The boy in the photo was very different from the scrawny, roughed up man across the hall, and Joel felt a pang of pity settle in his chest, melancholy washed over him. The siblings were young when the Outbreak happened, their life was only just beginning. They were on their way to becoming adults, finding out who or what they wanted to be. Their life that they were promised was stripped from their hands. Years of preparation taken from them like it was nothing in just a few short, hellish hours. 

Joel forced his gaze away, counting the seconds as they passed. The Outbreak had changed everything, had changed everyone. The world would never be the same, and it was survive or die out there. There were no exceptions, and there was no point in getting hung up on 'what ifs'. Nobody could afford to. 

Dani and Ben laid in her bed, the door left open so Ben could keep an eye on their guests, per his request. Ben was thankful Dani allowed him that, at the very least. She knew that he wasn't ecstatic with her at the moment, and she understood why he wasn't happy. To be completely honest with herself, if Ben had done what she did, she'd be fucking pissed, so it was only fair to let him keep the door open. 

She stared up at the ceiling, counting her breaths, counting Ben's. He too was awake still, staring at the ceiling. They never could go to sleep without resolving a fight, it was as if everything was off kilter, as if the world was slanted. Even when they were little, if there was a fight over toys or who got the last cookie, it always ended with a quiet apology. 

Anger simmered on Ben's side of the bed, it was suffocating. Dani could feel it choking her, so she did the only thing she could think of, and she initiated a truce.

"I wonder why they left Texas. The QZ is there," Dani whispered to Ben as she turned on her side to face him. He didn't move, not even a twitch or physical indication that he had heard her. She felt her stomach drop, and a rock form in her throat. Dani shifted her weight, moving to nudge her hand on his arm, but before she could, she heard his voice break the stagnant silence. Relief flooded through her system as he spoke softly. 

"Overcrowding probably. 'Specially since they took in residents of Oklahoma and Arkansas. You remember?" 

Dani nodded, she remembered alright. The soldiers who piled families into trucks to go to the Quarantine Zone in Dallas, the quiet panic that had settled into the house. She remembered her Pa hiding them away in the attic for weeks because he 'didn't want to leave the home his grandfather had built'. That's what he had told them. But her Ma had quietly added to the twins that it was really cause he didn't want them to all get separated. 

At the time, Dani didn't understand. Why would they get separated? All her friends had gone to the quarantine zone with their families, and they left together. That's what Carlos had said. 

Carlos…

She remembered Carlos, and she would never be able to forget him, so long as she was alive. 

She would never forget riding the bus to school with him when they were little. Or riding around the dirt roads in his truck when they were in high school. Or the nights they would sneak out of their houses to go see each other at the edge of the orchard. Even after the Outbreak, they tried to keep their routine of seeing each other, unbeknownst to their families of course. 

She remembered Carlos telling her there were soldiers going from neighborhood to neighborhood and packing everyone up. They were even allowed to take a bag or suitcase with them. He told her that the QZs were safe from infected, and that they were protected by FEDRA. He said that there would be jobs and schools and housing. 

Carlos made the QZs sound like a haven compared to what her parents whispered about late in the night…compared to what they ended up being.

She remembered the last time she saw Carlos. He and his family were going to leave the next day. She remembered her heart breaking clean in half at the words. How could he leave? Her Pa would never let her go with Carlos. He knew it too. 

Dani couldn't live without Carlos, nor could he without her. 

In the quiet of that last night together, they shared the last of what they had with each other, whispering sweet nothings and promises of plans that never happened.

"Yeah, I remember," she said quietly, not allowing herself to remember those nauseatingly awful months of the Outbreak. Clearing her throat and blinking away the wetness that had welled in her eyes, she forced herself back into the present. In her room, with Ben, and the two Texans across the hall. 

"I'm sorry," she whispered, "I should've talked to you before inviting them." 

Ben was quiet, processing her words. After a moment, he turned on his own side, facing his sister, "I know. But I trust you. If you think they're okay, then they're probably okay. You did good, Ma and Pa would be proud," he paused, before offering his own olive branch. "I'm sorry for doubting your judgment." 

Dani finally felt herself smile hearing those words. She knew that Ben trusted her, just as she trusted him. Not only was it the trust that had forged itself in their Ma's womb, but it was trust that had grown and solidified and built upon itself as they got older. If anyone was to survive the Outbreak, it was the twins. 

The sun had set, and Tommy hadn't spoken in a few hours or so—thank God. Joel loved his brother, but Jesus Christ, the man couldn't take a damn hint for his life. 

Despite not walking through Fort Smith, Joel had gathered they were long past it. They could barely see a damn thing, but the dirt road was clear and Joel wasn't too keen on stopping where they could be easily seen, despite the trees around them. But they longer they walked in the dark, the more he knew he was opening them up to danger or potential threats. 

The one good thing he had found about Arkansas, though, was the hills. He'd much prefer the hills to the flat lands they had passed through of Texas and Oklahoma. The high grounds were good for gathering some bearings, such as the one they were nearing now. But as they reached closer to peak, he put out his hand to stop Tommy, the first interaction they'd had since the late afternoon. 

"What the he—" Joel cut off Tommy with a point. Tommy looked at what his brother was looking at and understood immediately what had caught his eye. 

It was a house; small, and isolated. What really was interesting though, was the fact that there was light in the windows, and a stack of smoke rising from the chimney. They hadn't seen other people in about a week now, and though Joel typically wanted to avoid others, they both knew they were running low on supplies. A house in the middle of nowhere with signs of life meant food and water, possibly even a vehicle they could commandeer. That would make the Ozarks a hell of a lot easier, that's for damn sure.

People were just going to have to be a risk they'd take. 

"Don't move," a deep voice grumbled, the low vibrations felt against her back. Her breathing picked up, fast and shallow, like a corned rabbit. "Now, you're going to put down the shotgun. Don't give me a reason to kill you right here." 

Dani hesitated, thinking of Ben outside, the only weapon on him a small knife, maybe two. Eyes darting around, Dani looked for the other man, but when she couldn't see him, she concluded he was outside with Ben. Or she was crazy, but there was no way that she imagined a second man out of thin air. It didn't make any sense, she wasn't that hungry. 

Fuck. Ben was gonna get killed, and so was she—or worse. There was no way she was gonna just let that happen, though. She'd fight back, she'd run, anything. He wasn't going to take something that wasn't his to take. Weighing her options, she decided to pick her battles and drop the gun. It clattered to her feet, where she proceeded to kick it away. 

She felt the man relax—only a little—as if he was glad she listened to him. 

"Is the boy the only other person here? Nod or shake your head." 

Pausing once again, Dani debated lying before nodding her head once, as if to say 'yes, he's the only other.' 

A loud thud and grunt sounded from outside, and it was Dani's turn to tense up now. Eyes widening, she instinctively tried to turn to look outside, but the man's grip tightened, holding her head tightly to him. She let out a pained groan before she could suppress it, in which the man loosened his grip ever so slightly, offering her a bit of relief from the firm pressure he kept on her. 

The door slammed open, and a voice she'd never heard before called out. 

"Joel, what do you want to do with them?"

"Dani!" She heard her brother's voice—before a thunk and a heavy thud on the hardwood floors. Ben let out a cry, followed by a hissed 'shut up!'

So she wasn't crazy. There was indeed another man. There was a pause, a deafening silence that felt as if hit lasted for hours. The man behind her—Joel—broke the silence with a calm, steady voice.

"Tie 'im up. Gag 'im too, he seems…loud."

Without another word she heard a shuffle behind her. Her eyes fluttered close as she came to terms with the probabilities of the different outcomes. But before she could get very far into a thought spiral, Joel had maneuvered her to one of the kitchen chairs, releasing her mouth and tying her up. She let out the first full breath since he grabbed her, her lungs finally filling with air. For the first time, she laid eyes on the raider.

He was tall, much taller than anyone in her family. She couldn't make out much of his features in the darkness of the kitchen other than his height and stature. She could tell, though, that he had darker hair, and downcast eyes—as though he refused to meet her gaze. He was broad, and an intimidating man, but as he worked quietly with the rope, he almost was making himself smaller. 

He seemed like he would be a dangerous man, he probably was a dangerous man. But he seemed…sad. His shoulders were weighed down with something that couldn't quite be placed into words. She knew because she recognized it in the mirror almost everyday. She didn't say anything as she observed Joel, quietly taking him in and catching up on her breathing. Ben's muffled grunts broke through her train of thought, and she looked over to him, relieved he didn't look too injured. 

The other man had Ben laid on his stomach on the floor of the living room. An orange glow from the fire ominously shining on him. Ben's hands were bound and a cloth was shoved into his mouth. Blood from the squirrels stained his clothing, and Dani couldn't help but think of Ma having an utter fit for getting his outside clothes all over her rug. She couldn't help but suppress a small smile. 

She was interrupted by Joel pulling the chair into the living room next to Ben, and her heartbeat, once again, became rapid with fear of the unknown. Thoughts of who these people were, what they wanted, and what was going to happen next flooded her brain. But the two men just stood there, and in the light of the fire she could make out a bit more. 

Joel had hazel eyes, but they were dull, aching almost, and filled with grief. His muscular arms crossed his chest, and somehow she knew he was putting up a front. Playing off as though he were hardened. The raider was no raider at all. This was just a man trying to survive the shitty hand they all got dealt. And he was, well, quite good looking, admittedly. 

To his left, the man stood a bit more relaxed, and he wasn't putting a face on at all. This man, he was dangerous, and he knows it. He's not afraid to do what needs to be done. If anything, she was more afraid of him than she was of Joel, despite Joel clearly being the one who calls the shots. The scope over his shoulder, and the mere fact that he took down her brother single-handedly was terrifying to her. She didn't know that that was possible. 

"Dani, is it?" Joel asked her. She looked back up at him, her eyes narrowed. She nodded once, in simple confirmation. "How far are we from the mountains?"

She was taken aback. They wanted…directions? They fucking threatened her, tied her and her brother up, for directions?

"I don't know, I've never walked there before," she responded, now annoyed at the whole damn situation. Her tone earned her a muffled scolding from her brother, of which she ignored. Joel just quirked a brow at her. 

"You don't know?" He asked incredulously. 

"No. If you had a car it'd probably take you about three hours. But I'm assuming you don't have one of those." 

The other man let an amused sound escape from under his breath, as if he found her entertaining.

"And you don't?" Joel asked, tearing her attention from the dangerous one. Her face hardened as she picked up on what he was implying. Dani just cocked her head, before theatrically looking around the house. 

"Do you see any other houses around here? Signs of life or township? No? Alright, what about a gas station?" She paused, ignoring yet another warning from Ben. "There's no way for us to fuel up our gas guzzler of a truck anyway. So even if we did give it to you, it'd be pretty fucking useless wouldn't it?"

This earned a genuine laugh from the dangerous one, and a twitch of the eye from Joel. 

"I don't know if you're in the position to be talkin' like that Miss Dani," Joel crouched to be eye level with her. 

"Well, Mr. Joel," Dani's voice lowered, staring the man dead in the eye, "let's recap. You came into my home, you tied my brother and I up, and then started askin' me some pretty stupid questions. I have every right to speak to you like this." Dani paused, readjusting from firm, to something different. Something her Ma and Pa would want her to be. "Now, you two interrupted my brother and I making dinner. I am kindly offering you to share that meal with us and a roof over your head in exchange for you to let us go and not harm us." 

A sound protested from Ben, clearly unhappy she had made an offer without consulting him first. Joel looked at the other man, a silent conversation exchanged, before the dangerous one shrugged and Joel huffed a breath through his nose. 

"Do we have a deal?" 

Joel resumed eye contact with her, giving a curt nod. "Deal."

Tommy and Joel made quick work of untying the siblings. The boy scrambled to his feet once he was free, ripping the gag from his mouth and running to Dani. He pulled her close looking over her for any signs of harm, ignoring his own limp from where the butt of Tommy's gun struck him. He finally exhaled a sigh of relief when he was sure that she was untouched, despite her continuous reassurances that she was fine, and that Joel didn't hurt her. 

"I'm fine, really, I promise," she whispered to him. The siblings looked incredibly close in age, and strikingly similar, the only logical conclusion to Tommy was twins, either plain old twins or Irish. "Now, how close are the squirrels ready to be cooked?" 

The boy, shook his head in disbelief, muttering "You shouldn't have done that. People are trouble, and you know it." 

"Jesus, Ben, just go get the damn meat. You act as if I'm incapable of making decisions. Who knows what they would've done to you if I weren't here," she pulled away from him with a scoff before rubbing at her wrists, where the rope had been wrapped around her. Turning away from her brother, she faced the men. "There's a bathroom upstairs, first door on the right. Wash up," she turned to go back to the kitchen, and resume whatever she had been doing earlier. 

Joel and Tommy just looked at each other. It had been a while since someone had offered them kindness, let alone trusted them to be in their house with minimal supervision. 

"Right," Joel muttered, deciding this situation became odd enough, they might as well do what they were told. 

Ben couldn't believe how incredibly. Fucking. Naive his sister was. There's no way in her goddamn right mind she would allow two strangers in their house for dinner and lodging. He watched her return to the kitchen leaving him alone withe the men. They looked at each other before, walking up the stairs, and from the sounds of it, to the bathroom. Ben had half a mind to follow them and make sure they didn't do anything stupid. After all they did just have him and Dani tied up. But if he didn't go get the meat, like Dani had asked, she'd likely make him sleep outside. 

"Fuck," he groaned, throwing his head back in frustration, leaving to go get the meat. 

It was well into the night when Dani plated four plates of food instead of just two. Joel and Tommy, she had come to find out, were from Texas, and Tommy was more talkative than Joel. They wanted to get to the river through the Ozarks, and they were trying to avoid as many people as possible. Oh, the irony. 

Ben helped her bring the plates to the table, silently, still pissed she allowed them to break bread in their home. She knew once they left, he'd eventually get over it. Maybe he'd have a bit of attitude with her, but it was whatever. She knew if their Ma and Pa were still here, they'd do the same—Outbreak or no Outbreak. 

Dinner was held in a tense silence. Joel was stiff, and on edge, but ended up clearing his plate, same as Tommy and Ben. She observed each man, the way that they all held the same weariness, the same sadness to varying degrees. But it was Joel who captivated her attention the most. 

He was like a puzzle to piece together. There was something more than just the Outbreak that had happened to him. He wasn't whole, almost. As if he was on the edge of breaking himself. 

And Dani needed to know what it was. 

"Joel, we gotta get a move on." 

The morose man jerked from a dreamless sleep—if he could even call it that—with a sharp inhale. Without much thought, and almost too quickly, he moved from his resting position to a squatted orientation to roll up his supplies. His knees screamed at him and a dull ache threaded itself into the hardened muscles in his back. 

The past few years had taken an indescribable toll on him. Aging in normal circumstances changes the body in ways that confound him, but simply trying to survive The Outbreak had made 4 years seem like 40. He could feel it in his bones, and he could see it in his eyes. 

"Heard anything?" Joel asked the other man—Tommy. Looking up at the standing man, he squinted his eyes as the morning sun glared off of the gun that slung over his shoulder. The Outbreak wasn't kind to his brother either. Tommy was still young, but he too grew scruffier, more callous. 

Tommy stuck out his hand to help Joel to his feet. "No, nothin'. Guess it'll be more quiet as we get closer to the Ozarks."

"Don't say that word." Joel narrowed his eyes at him, before pulling out the worn map stolen from a ransacked gas station outside of the Dallas QZ. Tommy didn't need Joel to specify which word he shouldn't say. "We're 'bout a two hour's walk from Fort Smith, but I don't want to go inside city limits. Don't know how hard they got hit." 

He's quiet for a moment, studying the map. 

"We'll stay outside of city limits, but let's stay close to the water. Once we're around this bend," he points to show Tommy, "we'll start heading north." 

"Well, let's not waste any daylight. Shall we?" 

Tommy tried to stay in step with Joel, side by side as they wandered through the trees, up and over hills. He didn't have much of an issue with physical stamina, but they had been walking for close to fourteen hours straight now. The past few years had hardened his brother in ways he never had imagined. 

Joel was always the more standoffish of the two, not one to put himself out there. He was quiet, and simple. He stayed in his own world—Sarah. But after…Joel was different. Right after, Joel was broken and caved in on himself. Tommy watched him put brick by brick up, closing himself off to the world, becoming cold and stone faced. 

Brutal, and cruel. 

But Tommy wouldn't dare bring it up to Joel. It wasn't his place. He lost his niece, but Joel lost his world. 

And as much as the loss saddened Tommy, there was another piece of grief in his heart. 

Tommy never knew if he was going to see his brother again. Not truly. 

Dani sat in front of the fire place, staring at the blackened red brick, hugging her knees to her chest. The sun had long set, inky black of the night pouring in through the windows. Her breath clouded in front of her face, even though the windows and the doors were all shut. She would've thought that by now she'd get used to uncontrolled temperatures in the house, but she didn't. Four years after everything went to shit and Dani still found the house disgustingly hot in the summers and unbearably cold in the winters.

She knew that once Ben came back inside after hunting he'd scold her for not starting a fire, for not changing into warmer clothes or covering herself with a blanket at least. But she didn't like going upstairs without Ben home, she didn't like the dark. He knew that. He would want to sigh, his brows furrowing in frustration at her refusal to be alone in the shadows for even a moment. But he wouldn't say anything too scathing. He'd just gesture for her to follow him up.

So she sat there.

And she waited for Ben to come back home.

Benjamin walked up to the wooden two story house he grew up in. When he was younger, his house seemed like a mansion, the largest house you could own. He would run up and down the halls, ignoring the scoldings he'd get from his Ma. Dani and him would spend hours playing hide and seek, finding new nooks and crannies to tuck into. In the summer, the windows would be open, a breeze filtering through, and in the winter, the house would perpetually smell of apples and cinnamon. He'd lie in bed with his sister, waiting for Santa Claus, guessing what presents they'd get in the morning. 

Now, the house looked…old. Not decrepit, just…old. What once was full of life was now quiet. Overshadowed by tragedy and a sadness that nothing could cheer. The paint was chipping, the wood was weathering, and—

There was no smoke from the fireplace. 

Damn it, he thought, hoisting the squirrels he'd trapped and killed over his shoulder, picking up his pace. His calved burned as he hiked up the slopes to reach the front door. Wind nipped at his nose, and tousled the hair that hung out from under his beanie. His fingers wrapped tighter around the shotgun in his hand, making sure it wouldn't slip away from him. 

As he approached the steps, he made sure there was no mud on his boots. A habit neither him nor Dani could break after years of reprimands and lectures from Ma and Pa. Leaving the squirrels on the handrail to be skinned, cleaned, Ben knocked the rhythm he and his sister had used since they were knee high—a secret code for just the two of them—before opening the door with a low creak from the hinges. 

He set his gun down near the kitchen table, taking off his boots and walking into the living room. A shiver ran down his spine, baffled how it could be somehow colder within the walls of the house than it was outside. He looked down, finding his twin curled on the rug, asleep. 

"Hey, dumbass," he kicked her hard enough to wake up, but not so hard it would leave mark or anything. Ben suppressed a sigh of relief when Dani's eyes fluttered open. "Start a fire would ya? Wanna eat somethin'." 

Dani looked up at him before holding out her hand for him to pull her up. 

"Catch anythin'?" 

"Seven ton elephant," he deadpanned, walking out of the house with her to grab the two squirrels. "Anythin' show up?"

"No. Was hopin' for at least a runner or two, though, it was so fuckin' borin' today," Dani trotted down the steps, now fully awake, to get some firewood. 

"I didn't see anythin' either. Shouldn't hope to, though, you're gonna bring unwanted visitors here," Ben sat down on his father's stool, the very one he was taught to skin and prepare meat. Dani just scoffed and rolled her eyes. 

"You're superstitious."

"Maybe I am, at least I'm cautious."

"More like cowardly."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever you want to call it, fucker," Ben began to work the squirrels as his sister moved from in and out of the house to grab more firewood and kindling. 

Dani stoked the fire, building it up before preparing the root veggies to go with the squirrel. As she chopped the potatoes and carrots, all she could think of was how much she missed Walmart to buy food, and picking up soft drinks and chips from the gas station on the way home from school with her friends. She knew it wasn't healthy to think of a world that didn't exist anymore, to yearn for things she'd never get to experience again, but dear god did she miss it. 

She missed her friends and she missed going to school, her one ticket out of this godforsaken place. If The Outbreak had never happened, she would be close to graduating college now. A degree in god knows what, with a plan to get out, to see the world. 

A dull pain grew in her throat, the tell tale sign she needed to divert her attention. Like the food in front of her that was going to soon quell the gnawing ache in her stomach, or like what she needed to the next day, or the two men walking in the distance—wait.

Dani's head snapped to look out the window above the kitchen sink. Fuck. Dani dropped the skinny purple carrot she had been slicing, keeping a knife in her hand. She moved quietly to the gun her brother had—stupidly—left inside. She made her way to the door, thankfully out of the men's line of sight, and knocked on the door, before opening it. 

She didn't leave the house, trying to get the attention of her brother from afar without alerting the men. 

"Ben!" She hissed at him. "Benjamin!" 

When he didn't turn around, she groaned internally, knowing there was no way to get to her brother without giving herself away. She moved back inside to the kitchen, to get a good shot at the men. The shotgun was loaded and ready, all she needed to do was to aim and shoot. 

But when she looked out the window, they were gone.