#davesux

I'm just wanna be done. I wanna go ONE FUCKING DAY without thinking about you. ONE FUCKING DAY where you don't cross my mind and I don't breakdown. I want the thought of you to NOT take my breath away. I want to forget that the song I used to love had anything to do with you.....it's nothing more than a song I love....again. Why me????....FUCK I WANT THAT THOUGHT OUT OF MY HEAD!!!!! all the power lies with you still. Just the courtesy of telling me would make everything easy. I FUCKING HATE LOVING YOU!!!!!!! GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY HEAD!!!!!!!!! FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!! FFFFUUUUUUCCCCCCKKKKKKKKK! !!! FUUCKK! !!!! FUCK! YOU SUCK!!!

I stayed up all night sometimes just to get 5 mins of Daves time. 5 mins where there was just me and him. No work, no punks, no exes. We said I live you within the first 2 months. I cant remember the exact day ...He could I'm sure. I cant ask him tho. He's completely shut me out. His wife had their son July 7,2014.....exactly...10 yrs after my son was born. EXACTLY TO THE DAY. On July 6, we were talked no on skype and he got a txt saying she was at the hospital probably in labor. He was being cursed out by her friends for "doing this to hrr".... earlier that day he'd had dropped his girls off. He had went in to talk to her, upon my insistence, about where he stood in their sons life when he was born. She seen my pic on his phone as the screen saver. She asked who I was. He told her his girlfriend from America. She threw a remote and hit him in the head, he left. A few hours later she was in labor. I got scared when I found this out. I flipped and lashed out a lil at first. Then I remembered who he was (I thought) and knew he needed me. I took a deep breath and decided to be there for him. And on the 8th I woke up to my worst fear come true. He had deleted me, uninstalling me from his life. No msgs. No goodbyes. No fuck you bitch. I guess I had been just a nice little distraction for him while he was waiting.