#dapper!jack

careful who you ţ̫̮r̟̗̭͓̦ͅus̲͈͉͖̀ͅͅt҉̰̖̦

this is crap but it’s pretty long so i hope that makes up for it??????? also, first time giving an ego a name and im like lowkey nervous so here we gooooooo hope y’all enjoy and don’t hate me

also here’s my fav quote from this fic:

“Bim stood up, stepping onto his chair and, in lienau of a champagne glass, loudly screeched to get the group’s attention.”

like i know i wrote it but its still Big Freaking Mood

Warnings: Cursing, crowds, overwhelmed character

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Get-togethers with the egos had gotten progressively more interesting as an influx of egos from both Mark and Jack’s active channels floated into the gathering. The newest of which, was Dapper Jack; Dappersepticeye for long, or Dack for short.The aforementioned ego sat by himself, comfortably silent as he relaxed in a chair near the quieter side of the gathering area, away from Wilford and Dark, who were currently making far too much noise with their usual disputes. Dack fiddled with the deck of cards Marvin had got him as a “Welcome To The Family!” gift, the magician had claimed. He shuffled the cards casually, picked a seemingly random one out, glanced at it, and put it back in the stack. He shuffled the cards again, this time, slowly and carefully, fingers fumbling to keep the cards in an exact order. Then, he picked another card out of the stack, held it up, and his face lit up in joy as he noticed it was the same as the first card!Oh, joy! I must tell Marvin, he’ll be delighted!Just as Dack braced his arms on the sides of the chair, ready to stand and go announce his accomplishment to the magician, he was pulled back into his chair by another ego.“Dack! Hi!” Bim’s face came into Dack’s line of sight, and the mute ego smiled, waving at Bim, before warmly returning the hug that Bim pulled him into after. “Hey, buddy, so I have a question,” Bim started, and held out a pen and paper, ready for Dack to jot down his answer when prompted. The former ego gratefully took the paper, scribbling with the pen to make sure it worked before gesturing for Bim to continue.“What’s your name?” Bim asked bluntly, and Dack felt confusion rise in his chest, looking quizzically at the other ego.Dack? Dack wrote on the paper, showing it to Bim hesitantly. The show host shook his head, snatching the pen and scribbling over the name. “No, no, no, I mean you’re /real/ name! Like, mine’s Bim, and Host’s is… well, I actually don’t know what Host’s is,” Bim stared distractedly off into the distance, “Maybe I should go as-”“The Host would prefer to remain as the Host,” a voice interrupted as the Host walked towards the pair, his occasionally-used cane in hand. Usually, he elected to leave it at home, as his narration was usually enough, but the sheer amount of people in one congested area prompted him to bring it. And with the doctor distracted and Chica with Mark, it acted as the Host’s only physical guide through the chaotic crowd of egos.

“Oh! Host! Sorry, I didn’t, um.. see you there,” Bim chattered, his excited voice trailing off into something more cautious as he approached the word ‘see.’

Dack looked hesitantly at the blind ego, having some knowledge over his… unpredictability. He had only had a single conversation with Host, when he first came into existence and everyone welcomed him into the family, and, even then, he seemed… less than happy to be there. Dack mentally winced as Bim stumbled over his words in presence of the intimidating ego.

“Bim, if the Host had eyes, he would be rolling them at the moment,” Host said bluntly, smirking. Dack silently giggled as Bim’s eyes widened before the show host broke into laughter.

“Oh, Host, such a fun guy!” Bim said loudly, causing the Host’s mouth to become a tight line, clearly irritated. Bim stared blankly into open space for several long moments, and even Dack, the speechless ego, was beginning to feel a bit awkward with the silence by the time Bim snapped out of his thoughts.

“Host!” Bim nearly shouted again, making Host flinch away from the noise, his knuckles whitening over his cane. Dack furrowed his eyebrows, but didn’t have much time to be concerned before Bim was bringing them back to the subject matter.

“Yes, Bim?” Host asked, his voice dripping boredom and frustration.

“I was just talking to Dack over here about his name! He doesn’t seem to know what a name is, would you mind explaining it to him?” Bim asked, giving puppy-dog eyes to Host, even though the other ego couldn’t see him.

Host sighed, but began to explain. “A name is simply what a person is known by in casual conversation. For example, Dr. Iplier’s name is not, in actuality, Dr. Iplier, but is instead Edward,” Dack didn’t miss the way Host’s voice softened in the slightest on the doctor’s name, “The Host does believe that is what Bim is referring to as a name.”

“So, know that you know, can you tell us your name?” Bim asked excitedly, turning toward Dack, pleading the ego, “Please? Pretty please? Pretty please with cherries on to-”

“Bim,” Host interrupted, effectively silencing the show host, “Let him decide.” Dack, grateful for some of the pressure being lifted, shot a small smile at the Host, even though he knew the ego couldn’t see him.

Dack hesitated, grabbing the pen and paper Bim shoved in his face once more. He stared at it for several moments, pen floating over the paper in deliberation as he thought, mulling over telling the truth. Although he hated lying to the others, this secret brought him deep-set embarrassment.

Dack took a deep breath before turning his head up and smiling widely up at Bim. The smile didn’t quite reach his eyes, and it faltered when Dack shook his head and set down the pen, pushing the paper to the side.

Bim’s smile fell off, his eyes looking sad and disappointed. Dack wanted to look away. “You’re not gonna tell us? Why not?” Bim turned to Host, who had gone rigid, his lips clamped together tightly, “Host?”

Host opened his mouth, about to speak, but then quickly shut it again. He swallowed twice, his throat moving nervously, before opening it again, “The Host is refraining his narration from revealing anything about Dack that the ego wishes not to reveal himself.”

Bim turned to Dack, wide-eyed and a mixture of concern and overwhelming curiosity in his eyes, “What is it?”

Dack looked between Bim and Host, looking at the way Host nervously fiddled with his trenchcoat and the way Bim rubbed his palms together when he was excited. He also looked past them into the crowd, where Dark and Wilford had finally finished their argument and had settled for grumpily cuddling while sitting in the corner with each other. None of the Googles were present, all opting out of a social function and predicted rain in favor of working on their latest project. Dr. Schneeplestein was also absent, claiming the crowd of egos was too loud for his liking and he had “Much more important work to do, I wouldn’t expect you to understand,” in his thick accent.

From the other side of the room, Anti caught Dack’s eye and waved, grinning a bit crazily, eyes flashing before he turned back to his conversation with Marvin and Robbie. Dack’s gaze flicked over to Ed and Silver, both of which were attempting to steal mini cupcakes from the table filled with an assortment of foods. Dr. Iplier and Chase stood off to the side, having a pleasant conversation, both chuckling between themselves.

Finally, Dack looked back to the pair in front of him, judging the concerned concentration of Host’s face and the curiosity littered on Bim’s.

He could trust them, he knew. They were family, after all.

Dack grabbed the pen and paper again, movements slow and his usual smile nowhere to be found. His hands trembled in the slightest as the ink spread across the page in the form of words.

I don’t have a name.

Host let out a sigh of relief, the tension draining from his shoulders, letting out a quiet, quick mumble of narration, as Dack showed the paper to Bim, who gasped loudly. Dack tensed up, twirling his moustache in an uncharacteristic nervous fashion.

“No name? Well that simply won’t do! We need to find you a name!” Bim exclaimed loudly, bursting into an excited smile. Bim stood up, stepping onto his chair and, in lienau of a champagne glass, loudly screeched to get the group’s attention.

Wilford rushed over in excitement, curious about all the noise. Dark looked irritated and ruffled as his source of warmth was ripped away from him, and he stood, making his way over to where the commotion was. Anti, Robbie, and Marvin were close to follow, along with Ed and Silver, both being scolded by the doctor for “rotting their teeth out” with the sheer amount of sweets. Chase went to stand by Anti, who looked secretly pleased to have him near again.  Eventually, all of the present egos were gathered around and Bim addressed the crowd.

“So! Dack here, doesn’t have a name! Poor fellow,” Bim said sorely, only pausing for a miniscule moment before excitedly moving on again, “He needs a name! So I called you all here to give this lovely ego,” Bim gestured to Dack behind him, who sheepishly waved and smiled, “A name! Any ideas?”

Immediately, all of the egos began shouting at once, with the exception of Robbie, who groaned and attempted to form words, and the doctor, who went to stand near the increasingly irritated and overwhelmed Host. Voices overlapped each other, and only a few names could be heard over the noise.

“Julian!”

“Harrison!”

“Frederick!”

“Gunnerman2008!”

“The hell, Wilford? What kind of a name is that?”

“Hey, at least I’m trying, Dark! Unlike someone I know.”

“You little sh-”

“Okay, okay!” Bim yelled over the crowd for several minutes, trying to get them to quiet down. When he was unsuccessful, he looked dejectedly over at Dr. Iplier. The doctor moved away from Host, cupped his hands to his mouth and yelled above all of the voices.

“Everyone! Shut the hell up!”

Silence fell over the room and Bim high-fived the doctor as he made his way back to the Host, who was bent over his cane, rubbing his temples tiredly.

“It’s up to Dack to decide now! So, everyone quiet and let him think!” The room’s eyes were on him and Dack picked up the pen, making his way over to the nearest table, where a lonely piece of paper sat.

Dack mulled over all of the names he had heard shouted out. None of them really seemed to click like he thought them would. Frederick was too old, Harrison was too young, Gunnerman2008 was, well… Wilford’s idea. All of the names had something wrong with them, something that made Dack’s insides squirm in discomfort.

Suddenly, a name popped into his mind.

It wasn’t an entirely unfamiliar name, but before today, he had never even thought of it. Still, it clicked. He felt it click, somewhere deep inside his chest, and warmth bloomed throughout his veins. He felt empowered, secure, safe. The name was right, he knew it.

Adjusting his top hat, Dack picked up the pen, writing in large, confident letters. He showed it to the egos standing behind him, his family standing behind him, and they cheered.

I already got a HC for Dapper!Jack

He's a time traveler

It’s them boys