#dance tag

celebrating my long overdue and very much awaited OFFICIAL RETIREMENT from teaching dance by popping bottles and writing old man porn, as you do

i am not someone who believes bad things happen for a reason or even that suffering is necessary for joy. but um. i grew up dancing because i Wanted to like it was absolutely always my choice and my insistence and i like Knew i loved it but also it was something i had been doing since i was two and it was sort of my whole life so mostly it was just The Thing I Did. it was My Thing. and then i got so fucking sick and also so fucking scared and just for years did not do the thing that had been my number one priority for my whole life. and it turned out i missed it more than i'd ever considered i would and i loved it more than i ever considered i did. and i thought i was doomed. and now i am not really any less sick but i am in this way a lot less scared and i am dancing so much again and i get to experience the overwhelming joy and love for it as if it is a completely new thing and a completely new love and a completely new joy and it is just completely overwhelming. i never want to do anything else. i wish i could fit it in every day i wish i could learn every single style i LOVE IT!!! i didn't KNOW the way i loved it and now i get to love it AGAIN and KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sooooo tired but i have dance practice in like an hour. will try to get more energy before then.