#dagonet

References for the SATBK AU I have with NuclearLolly.

[oc] 🎪Dagonet & Heely!!🎪

Its been a while since I drew these two!

[colored sketch version!] Trying to figure out confetti placement here

Arthur was killed by a giant cat.* 

Arthur killed the cat.

Arthur didn’t fight the cat. Kay did.

Kay and Bedivere use salmon as taxis. 

Lucan is half giant, half lion. (This Lucan, Lucano in the original Italian, is evil and not related to Bedivere). 

King Arthur raided the land of the dead.

The human knight Caradoc Briefbras has three half siblings: a dog, a horse, and a pig.

A large portion of Arthur’s troops was killed a while before Badon by his nephew’s attack ravens in self-defense. Arthur and said nephew were playing chess at the time and neither did much to stop it. [Edit: before Badon, not Camlann, which has apparently already happened despite Arthur and Mordred being alive]

Merlin retired peacefully and went to live in the countryside with his also-magic sister Ganieda, Taliesin, and another of their friends. [Edited]

Wherever Arthur walks, plants die. They don’t grow back for years.

Arthur had a spunky (half?) brother who died in battle after making a mysterious oath.

Dagonet is more or less able to run the kingdom when Arthur is gone. His biggest error is overspending on mercenaries.

Guinevere has an evil almost identical twin half-sister.

Hector beat up all the best knights except for Galahad while possessed by a demon.

Gawain plays tennis.

Gawain has used a chessboard as a weapon.

Near the start of his reign, Arthur left Lot in charge of the kingdom and went on a quest with a sassy parrot.

Gawain or Galahad succeeded Arthur as king.** 

*Whether or not this is canon anywhere is a somewhat meta matter. André de Coutance complains that the story that Chapalu/Cath Palug killed King Arthur and conquered England is a slanderous lie while also implying it's widely circulated. He's saying that it's canon in other places and also that it's wrong. As far as I know, no other text mentions a tradition where the cat kills the king.

En cette période de canicule, je soumets à votre considération : les chevaliers de la Table Ronde aux pays chaud. Genre pour une expédition en Judée (Dagonet sert de guide), à la recherche d'infos sur le Graal, ou que sais-je.

Galessin, duc d'Orcanie, archipel subarctique au nord de l’Écosse, température moyenne estivale : 12°C, fait une insolation day one et est absent tout le reste de la mission (comme d'habitude, donc, mais cette fois-ci, c'est ✨justifié par le scénario✨).

Calogrenant "un chevalier, c'est en armure", refuse d'adopter une tenue plus légère. Comme en plus il est chauve, il cuit bien lentement à l'étouffée et tout le monde se fiche de lui en le traitant d'écrevisse.

Lancelot goûte un plat épicé et passe à deux doigts du trépas. (Soyons honnêtes, ils ont tous un palais de white boy britannique (sauf Galessin, qui a l'habitude des saucisses orcaniennes qui arrachent un peu), mais Lancelot plus que les autres. Et avec sa peau de blond, ça se remarque tout de suite évidemment)

Karadoc découvre la cuisine à l'huile d'olive et tape un scandale, parce que soit-disant rien ne vaut le bon beurre normand

Bohort vit sa meilleure vie et est tout heureux d'échanger sur la culture locale, les étoffes, la musique, l'art...

Perceval est le premier à remarquer que les étoiles ne sont pas les mêmes que chez eux et passe toutes ses nuits à les contempler (en plus, il fait moins chaud la nuit, tout bénef). Il aime toujours pas le boulgour