#daeniran

34. “Let’s keep this between the two of us.” + Elucien

Elain tilts her head and a lock of hair falls from where she’d secured it behind her ear. She feels fingers trace featherlight over her forehead, tucking the wayward strand out of her face. Lucien lets his hand linger just a moment too long on her jaw, brushes his thumb across her skin, twists the ends of her hair between his fingertips.

Her eyes drift up from the dense block of text to find him looking at her with a gentle, patient hunger.

She gulps—but doesn’t shy away when he leans forward in his chair, doesn’t pull back when he tips her chin up to align it with his, doesn’t turn her head when he presses their lips together.

Entire symphonies couldn’t play the song echoing in her chest; a bright, aching melody—loud and soft and fast and deliciously, torturously slow. But—

“I should get back,” she blurts, tearing her mouth from his, yanking her hand back from where it had become tangled in his t-shirt.

Elain can feel his body chase after hers—like magnets separated by force struggling to again become one.

“Elai—”

“I’m feeling a lot better about tomorrow,” she says, stuffing three textbooks and an overfilled binder back into her pale pink tote bag, refusing to make eye contact with him.

“Let’s—”

“Keep this between the two of us.” Her eyes are wide, pleading. Oh, he would be so upset if he found out.

Lucien frowns; nods.

And the sight tugs at something inside her; makes her feel even worse. “It’s just—”

“Graysen,” he finishes for her, sounding tired as he rolls his palm flat against the desk and sinks low in his chair.

She goes back to gathering her things, placing multi-colored pens in a zipper pouch and sliding that into her bag, too. “I don’t think he’d like it very much if he knew we were studying together,” she mumbles, working quickly.

His eyes are honest; cautious. “Is that what we were doing?” he breathes, voice barely a whisper over her thundering pulse.

Elain swallows back the ‘No’ on the tip of her tongue and stands. “Goodnight, Lucien,” she says instead. It comes out harsher than she meant it to, but it’s probably just as well. She’s kind to everyone, but she’s kindest of all to her red-haired lab partner. Too kind, perhaps.

Her hand’s on the doorknob to the study room, turning it, when—

“Sleep well, dove.”

She pauses at that—at his name for her. Offers him a small smile. It’s not enough—or maybe it’s too much. She’s not sure.

She’s not sure of much anything nowadays—except how she feels when she’s with Lucien.

But… it can’t—they can’t—

“See you in the morning?” he asks, voice tender.

Not for the first time, Elain wonders how things might be now if Feyre and Tamlin had never dated, had never ended things in tears and screams and anger. And maybe it makes her a bad person, maybe it makes her a traitor, but—

“See you in the morning,” she says softly, smiling, like she’s giving up a closely guarded secret.

Lucien smiles back, and she thinks it feels like hope.

aahh thank you for sending me this!! @dracos sent me a couple of these a while back too (i’m so sorry for the late reply ahhhh) so i’ll just answer them here!! you’re both so lovely agshdsjkdjs 💕

1. i got my hair cut really really short like last december & i really like it

2. my musical sense is improving!!

3. i’m pretty decent with words 

4. i think i can empathise with people pretty well, or at least be a good listener

sure <33

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