#dadsproblems

Today's lesson for the dad going through divorce is one that is not learned immediately. This lesson takes time. Lesson number 3 is about confidence. At first, I was upset because I was alone. Me thinking I was alone meant I had to do everything by myself and alone. And for that reason alone, I was afraid to do anything. I didn't leave the house. I didn't want to go anywhere. It wasn't until 10 months later that I realized I could do this! I can finish school. I can raise two kids on my own. I can take my kids out of the house and we can be happy doing things just the three of us. So lesson number is an easy one to learn but very difficult to realize. Have confidence in everything you do. Once you have found this confidence you will feel happier and if there are kids involved, they will be happier.

The following really only applies to those going through a divorce with children involved. No matter what is said, no matter what decisions have been made or still need to be made, the number one priority must be the children. Yes, you don't like her and yes, she hates you. You must put all that aside and be civil and compromise in the best interest of the child(ren). Everything changes when you put the kids first. Yeah you want half of the bank account and yeah she wants half of your 401k. But did anyone ask the children what they want? At first I wanted to move as far away as possible. Now, with me putting the kids interests first, I want to stay close, I want the kids to stay in the current school district, I want to see them as much as possible. And if I get custody of them I want their mom to see them and have equal visitation like I have now. Lesson #1 - Talk Lesson #2 - Children first