#dadren

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She was sleep, had been asleep for some time now, but Eren still couldn’t seem to put her down. His baby. His daughter. His little Akari. They’d only had her with them a few days, at home only two and already Eren couldn’t imagine what life had been like before they’d made her just like he could barely remember what life was before Mikasa had come to him.

Now he had her and their baby and He felt his eyes watering again as he rocked his little one because this was a future he’d never known was in the cards for him, at least not this happy, this joyful, this blissful.

Easily readjusting her, he was quick to swipe underneath his eyes lest his tears fall and wake her. Akari was a pretty sound sleeper, so Eren doubted that a bit of water would bother her, definitely Mikasa’s genes there, but he didn’t want to chance it. She needed her rest to grow big and strong. Glancing around, he took a few steps backward and eased into the arm seat they’d put in the nursery.

Eren felt like his whole life had been redefined by this little life here. Her tiny, button nose wrinkled and he froze his rocking as her lids crinkled. For a second he thought she might wake but his hand found her soft baby hairs, thumb gently easing her brow.

“Don’t worry, sweetheart. Daddy will protect you from anything that may come your way.” And he would. His life now meant protecting his kid, making sure she grew up well and never had any needs that couldn’t be met. Eren thought he’d changed when he met Mikasa. Suddenly the world seemed brighter, lit with endless opportunities and he had a hand to hold and explore it all with.

Now he knew that while his perspective on life had changed he had not, not like when this tiny person, both her and him, that she’d carried inside her for nine months had changed him, the first time he heard her cries, saw her angry red face, felt her itty bitty hand try and hold a single one of his fingers.

Now Eren had new fears. His kid would depend on him. He would be responsible for raising them up right, teaching them to be a decent human being. He’d have to show them how to love and to trust but not be too trusting. Akari would need to know how to make it in life, how to make a way and a place for herself in the world.

Now he questioned his worth in a completely different way. Was he worthy of such a responsibility, what if he failed? What if he was a shit dad who was bad at understanding babies and toddlers and children and teens? What if he couldn’t identify with her or figure out the right things to say? What if he led her down the wrong path because for a while it seemed like he might have -

“Eren?” It took everything in him not to jump and jostle Akari, but his body and mind were already easing at the sight of his lovely little wife at the door. “Are you coming to bed,” she asked with a knowing smile, her eyes all for the bundle in his arms.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’ll be there in a few minutes. Just let me put Akari in her bassinet.”

“Okay.” In a few short strides, Mikasa was over and leaning down, pressing gentle lips to their baby’s forehead. “Sweet dreams, sugar plum.” And then she pressed them to his temple as well and Eren found himself leaning in hoping to make it last. “See you soon, daddy,” she whispered as she broke away.

He watched her go, once again reminded that she always seemed to be there when he needed her. Mikasa was his love. His partner. She chose him, just as he chose her, and he thankfully hadn’t fucked that up. Whatever he lacked, she surely made up for tenfold. Whatever lesson he couldn’t teach Akari, Mikasa could. What they didn’t know, they would learn together.

Their family was bigger than just the two of them now, but if he didn’t have complete faith in himself alone, then he had it in them together. Smiling down at the sleeping babe, Eren rose and strode over to where he’d be putting her down for the night.

“Bedtime sweetheart. It looks like mommy is waiting for daddy to sleep too.”