#cuttingoff

It's not everyday “cutting people off” without God’s direction, more often it’s just about learning how to create and effectively maintain boundaries for people. Of course sometimes you may well need that distance and separation from that person, which God will permit so that you have healing time but even within that time you should be praying for not just that person to come to restoration but also for yourself – the strength and the wisdom to know how to handle the relationship and of course this will happen in God’s time. (2 Cor. 2:5-11 a part of that scripture made me think about this issue)

I’ve finally come to the conviction that cutting people off completely – as in: “I never want to hear from you again, don’t call me, don’t come to me for anything, from now on leave me alone.” Is not actually Godly, it doesn’t show the love of Christ.

I truly believe that the main issue behind the problems with cutting people out of your life/distancing yourself from people comes from how you went about it... Did you go to The Lord about your issue? Did you wait, allowing Him to speak His wisdom giving instruction about what to do with regards to your relationship with that person? Or did you just go and do, based on what you felt was the right thing to do?

I do believe that sometimes God will remove people from your life, seasons change but I believe that when it happens, you’ll both know it’s time to part company or it will happen naturally or he’ll give you the strength to get over it. I don’t believe that either of you will be left hanging, or wondering about what happened; there will and should be proper closure and with that said – the relationship between you both should be amicable, as in, there will be no hostility between you both, if you see each other there won't be any tension and either of you will feel you can at least say hello... BUT that is The Lord’s doing! I don’t believe it’s something you should try and force, you both should be ready – your emotions should feel almost void to your decision - its to do with wisdom, what is best.

More time we act without even thinking of the consequences of our actions, how it affects the person, how it affects us and also how may affect people surrounding the relationship. In my opinion, many of us leave out the wisdom in our decisions. Instead of seeking God’s direction, His guidance and wisdom about what to do, we make a decision based on emotion – how the person made us feel or affected us emotionally. How do you know (when you have based that decision merely on how the person made you feel) whether or not God wants to use you to give a message to that person whom you’re distancing yourself from? Yes there will be a time for distance, where you’ll need to heal but that period won’t last for long; emotions change over time and there will come a point where your emotions won’t be a major factor in making a decision about what kind of boundaries you need to have with that person. Furthermore, with or without taking into consideration your feelings towards them, have you even had a conversation that person, in love, and explained how you feel and why you think the decision you have made (whether cutting off or distance) is for the best or why you believe it is necessary at the moment? – Have you actually taken into account their feelings?

I’m just a bit sick and tired of hearing people say, “I'm cutting off so-n-so” with no spiritual justification and having not given any real explanation to that said person.