#customer is wrong

I'm really tired of working in food service.

People will get mad over the smallest things. They get mad at the cashier for the prices being too high when the cashier has no control over them. They get mad over their food not looking perfect. They get mad if the workers make a mistake, as if we're not human beings. They get mad if we run out of a certain product.

Some customers are genuinely nice and chill people, but there's not enough of them to balance out the terrible ones.

I'm just...tired of dealing with them. I've had a sinus headache for the last few days and had to work and it felt like hell.

So, I make her sandwich. I only put mayonnaise and cheese on it. I wrapped it up, put it in a bag, hand it to her, and wished her a good day.

Some time later, she comes back and tells me "You messed up my sandwich!" I was confused, so I asked her to clarify. "There's no lettuce or tomato or anything on here."

"You said you only wanted mayonnaise on it," the cashier said.

"I only didn't want pickles," she responded.

Well, lady, you didn't say that. You said you only wanted mayonnaise, the cashier rung up your sandwich as "only mayonnaise", so that's all I put on your sandwich. Don't get mad at me because you weren't being specific with your order.

Okay, so I need to vent this out as much as possible because this was the worst customer I personally had to deal with so far in this god forsaken office supply store.

Starts off with it being 30-minutes until closing and end of my shift and my coworker needing some ink for a customer at her register, and it’s like “Okay, cool, get them ink and be on my way.” About five minutes pass and my coworker needed assistance with the same customer at the register. Our manager was busy with another irate customer in a different department, so being the next-in-line person who deals with shit, I head back over. I find out that the guy was trying to return his old boxes of ink in exchange for the ones he was trying to buy. No receipt and one set of ink cartridges didn’t even have a fucking box anymore. I told him I couldn’t take that back because there’s no box and we need it to scan the items back into our system. He told us that that’s how he bought them! Just like that! No box! ALREADY UNBELIEVABLE. I decide to look over the ink that were in boxes so that maybe I can help the stupid ass customer be on his merry fucking way. 

BUT HOLD THE FUCKING PHONE. THE FUCKING INK CARTRIDGES WERE EXPIRED AS FUCK. I look at the guy and was like, “Sir. I can’t return any of this. These must have been purchased about two years ago.” And he. fucking. loses it. “WHAT DO YOU MEAN EXPIRED?! THEY’RE NEW! THEY’RE NOT EVEN OPEN!” And I was just not going to have his shit today! Rude ass customers that try to take advantage of retail workers are the number one motherfuckers I don’t bend any fucking rules whatsoever. Customer always right? FUCK. THAT. NOISE. This customer is 10,000,000% wrong aND NOT GETTING AWAY WITH JACK SHIT.

But of course, being in retail, we need to at least try to be nice. So I keep my composure and try to calmly tell him. “Sir. I understand that these boxes are unopened, but they are not new.” I pick up the box of ink and tell him, “Ink has an expiration date that is marked on these boxes.” I tell him the date of expiration and he has the goddamn audacity to swipe another box up to his crusty, old ass eyes and tell me. “WHERE?! THERE IS NO DATE ON HERE!” And he’s scanning the exact area where I showed him. So I figure I help this blind ass shithead locate the date I just fucking showed him. And he kicks this shit up ANOTHER notch. “THERE’S NO WAY I BOUGHT THIS MORE THAN A YEAR AGO!”

A-ha! SO BITCH ASS ADMITS THAT IT’S BEEN A LONG ASS TIME SINCE HE BOUGHT THEM BUT STILL WANTS TO FUCKING RETURN THEM. EVEN AFTER SEEING THE EXPIRATION DATE. I LOVE IT. 

Next thing I know, he’s putting the NEW boxes of ink (which he hasn’t paid for yet) into his bag that he brought in and left the old ones on the counter. He is STILL under the impression that we’re doing this fucking exchange. I point at the bag and straight up tell the bitch, “Uhhh, sir, I can’t let you leave with that.” And he blows up a bit more. “THAT WAS THE DEAL!” And in my head, I just go 

“DeeeEEeEeeEEAAAAaaalL?!?!?!” But I can’t say that so I tell him, “Sir. That’s not how this works. I can’t just exchange the ink like that. I don’t know when you bought these since you have no receipt, but I can’t exchange them for new ink cartridges based solely on the fact that these ink cartridges are expired, and can only assume they’ve been purchased well over our 90 day return policy.”

“OH, SHUT. UP!” Ladies and gentleman, this is where I fucking lose it.  “THEY’RE NOT EXPIRED! YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT!!!” he continued. And things get a little bit hazy for myself because now my blood was actually boiling and the composure started to fade away. According to my poor coworker standing next to me who just has to witness this, I told him, “Actually! I do!” in the most ‘hahahafuckyou’ kind of tone. 

After that, he finally calms down just a bit because he knows he can’t fucking win and I won’t let him. So he caves and goes, “Fine! I’ll just buy the ink then!” And as soon as he said that, I nod, say thank you, and get my merry ass out of that area before I commit a murder.

It’s not over just yet, though! I watch this asshat finish his transaction AND INSTEAD OF LEAVING, GOES BACK TOWARDS THE AISLES. AND I SWEAR IF HE WAS COMING TO FIND ME I WAS GOING TO STAB HIM. Bitch can’t find me so he starts talking to another associate who refers him to our manager who had only finished up with her irate customer after I walked away. And I should have told my manager how fucking rude this guy was because she would have told him to leave, but I only told her what was relevant with the ink. I only told her after he left and she said I should have told her so she could have told him to leave. Dammit. So not knowing what exactly happened, she at least still does not take the ink back for an exchange, but discounts the new ink and gets him the fuck out of there. 

5 Signs Your Customer Doesn’t Belong With You

Too often, we fall back on the mantra “the customer is always right.”

But is that always true?

Here are our five ways of telling if you aren’t a good fit with your customer:

1. You dread you interactions

Your day is going fine. Everything is lovely. You get a call, check the number on the caller ID, and your whole mood deflates. It’s not just that some customers only call when there’s a problem.…

are the ones that show up with 5 minutes left on a Sunday. We close early on a Sunday. So of course these jackasses only come in so they can try to haggle the salesman down easier since they know we want to leave.