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Thanks I was scared that I would inconvenience anyone by asking for things or for my needs to be met. I would slink into the kitchen and "steal" slices of cheese because I was convinced I'd be in trouble if I grabbed food. I would ask my parents if I was allowed to go to the bathroom in my own home. My bed didn't have my blankets on it yet and only had a pillow and I accepted that I would be sleeping like that because I thought it was rude to ask for blankets.
More ranting below cut (and mentions of s/h and eating struggles and suicide)
"you're so skinny oh my!!"
Thanks I haven't known the difference between hunger and an upset stomach since 3rd grade. And everyone in my life tells me "wow you ate a lot!" Whenever I go back for seconds. And also my stepmom said "I wish I had that problem" when I mentioned my psychiatrist said I lost weight at a concerning rate. But I'm just "lucky" I guess.
"You stay so calm in stressful situations!"
I have silent panic attacks and go mute and cut myself when I get home but sure. Thanks.
"You have such a good pain tolerance!"
Thanks when I get upset over pain my friends and family tell me to shut up and it's not that bad. And I cut myself but yk I'm just chill I guess
"You don't let anyone's words get to you!"
I've been called slurs daily and people regularly tell me I'm in the wrong bathroom or that I'm not a real man but thank you 😍
"we didn't know you'd develop anxiety and depression this badly!"
ಠ,_」ಠ
I've always been like this. You just started noticing when I starting cutting and you had to hide the meds.
Wanting to say that I have vocal stims but afraid of the neurodivergent-lingo police that will hang me in town square for saying I have a stim despite not being diagnosed with any kind of neurodivergency
Random yapping below cut
Anywayyyy I've had weird vocal stims recently and I would like to tell the internet about them
"Big booty latinas" - Idk where it came from but I'm tweaking out trying not to say it 😭
"Pussy tight pussy clean pussy fresh" - self explanatory. Also don't know what started it
"Pineapple upside down ya in the toilet I make a brown ya" - from that one random ass song do yall know it just pretend you do
and more but I have the memory of a fucking sperm cell
Summer break is going to break me I swear to god because the lack of socialization makes me start believing in the shadow man that makes sure I go back to sleep when I wake up at 3 in the morning
If I wasn't a pussy I'd go die so I don't have to deal with this shit smh
Also I somehow have imposter syndrome with my mental health (^^) like I feel like I can't say I'm not well because if I know I'm not in the right mental state then that means I'm conscious of it and also I feel like if I don't cut myself and leave a mark then I'm just not mentally ill so therefore I must be lying to the professionals that are attempting to help me
But I have fomo so it'd be easier if everything vanished all at once
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming