#cupidgives

‘Hey, Ronin?’

‘What's it, baby?’

‘I- um -’ You're unsure of how to even start . How do you bring something like this up? You bite your lip in worry, tuck your head against Ronin's chest and rub your face over his shirt in hopes it will calm you down like it normally does. Your heart is racing ; this should be easy , should be simple , to talk to your boyfriend about this. Yet for some reason it makes your mouth dry and your palms sweat to even think about it. 

You've been dating Ronin for a while now, your friendship having bubbled into something more over a steady simmer during all those months of flirting in the Slaughterhouse. Well, less flirting and more Ronin teasing you while you got steadily redder on camera until you panicked and ended the call. Does that count as flirting? You think it should , it worked , right?

You think that Ronin finds you endearing . Cute. Adorable. Which had worked in your favour before, when you were too shy to kiss him that day in Purgatory. 

When he had asked that fatal question: ‘or are you kissing me?’ He'd watched the way your eyes had gone wide, a heavy flush settling over your face as your gaze darted helplessly between his eyes and his mouth. A sly smirk had settled onto Ronin’s face, and the hand not holding the knife had brushed across your cheek. He'd stepped in close, close enough your breathing had stopped for a second, and he'd said, ‘what’s wrong, baby? Do you want to but you can't?? Is my dear darlin’ writer too shy?’

You'd shaken your head frantically, too caught up in your embarrassment over a kiss to realise what he was getting at. Ronin had drawled, ‘ no? ’, leaned in close enough for his lips to brush your ear as he murmured, ‘Does that mean you're killing me then?’ He’d sounded ecstatic, almost sensual , like that reality was equally as tantalising as you kissing him.

You'd squeaked , hands coming up to grip the front of Ronin’s leather jacket while your head swam at how close he was to you; you could smell him, a mixture of motor oil, something metallic, and …maybe citrus? 

You were hyper aware of exactly how much of Ronin was in your space; his tall form bracketing yours, shoulders boxing you in against the wall, his hair tickling your cheek, his breath puffing over your face, the sharp edges of his grin brushing your ear at the feeling of you swaying into him. 

‘Well, which is it, baby? Are you kissing me or killing me? Come on, we don’t have all day. You gotta pick one.’ His voice was amused, breathless with an edge of venom in the tone. It was clear by his words he was teasing you; like he didn't care which one you picked as long as you kept entertaining him, but the undercurrent to his tone sounded like his patience was running thin, like if you didn’t pick one soon, he would choose for you. 

‘I-Ronin.’ You'd choked out, face burning at how intense you were finding this, at how intense you were making this. It was just a simple kiss and yet you couldn't bring yourself to tilt your head up and connect his lips to your own. You'd walked all the way out here, to a known serial killer's favourite killing spot, and yet you were too shy to kiss him. It’d be funny if it wasn’t so real.

‘I’m The Butcher out here, darlin’, don't'cha know?’ You'd shivered, the feeling tingling down your spine as you whined slightly, swaying into him, your eyes dipping shut against your will. Ronin had let out a happy hum, dragged his nose across your cheek and murmured, ‘Should I have mercy on my poor little bunny? Put them out of their misery?’ You'd gasped, eyes snapping open, frozen in place, as the point of the knife Ronin was holding had pressed ever so gently into your other cheek. You hadn’t even heard him move. 

You could do nothing but stare at it in fear, eyes wide, until Ronin had drawled out, ‘Nah. Wouldn't do that to you, baby. You're too sweet to let bleed out in Purgatory. We’re saving the blood letting for later.’ He’d laughed, short, sharp, and deranged in your ear before pressing a wet, snacking kiss to the side of your face. ‘Need to taste you myself before I let that happen.’ 

Ronin was still snickering quietly to himself as he pulled back to look at you. Your hands were shaking where they were gripped tight, pressing sweaty against his jacket, the cold metal zipper biting heat down into your palm. He'd put the knife away, tucked it somewhere safe and far from you as your heart beat out your chest. Ronin had then gripped you meanly by your soft cheeks, forcing your lips to pucker almost comically as he brushed his own over yours in a twisted mimicry of a kiss. Teasing you with how almost it was, and how sincerely it wasn't . 

Yet the wet slide of his mouth against yours still traced an electric line across your lips, the feeling shooting through you, tingling with desire and stirring a twitching interest in your pants. You'd made a sound like a wounded animal, desperate , attempted to pull Ronin closer by your grip on his jacket but he instead leaned back, used his height against you, and let go of your face entirely. 

He’d murmured, ‘Good bunnys ask for what they want, darlin’.’ Curled a lock of your hair around his finger and tugged gently. He'd then leaned back down into your space, almost kissing you but not quite, pulling back every time you leaned up into him, keeping a hair's breadth between your mouths until you'd had enough and whined out, ‘Roninnnnnnn,’ breathless and embarrassed. You’d quickly followed it up with, ‘Ronin, kiss me, please,’ heart thundering in your chest. 

Ronin had chuckled . Gripped you by the jaw softly, said, ‘All you had to do was ask , sweetheart’, before kissing you softly, sweetly , chastely. You’d had to chase him when he pulled back, desperate and wanting enough to drag his lips back to your own until Ronin gave in and kissed you properly, all sharp edges and hunger.  

And therein was where the problem started. At first, you'd been worried that maybe Ronin would want to move too fast ; you didn’t have any experience with physical intimacy, and he’d kissed you with such fervour in purgatory that in the days afterwards you’d panicked . Got in your own head about it and started to worry you wouldn't be able to keep up, that soon he'd want more from you than you could give, that maybe he’d grow bored of you if you didn’t keep his attention with sex. 

You’d had relationships start and end in the blink of an eye because of that very issue before, and you couldn’t help but worry that this would be the same , even if every sign pointed to it not being like that. There were all these thoughts in your head, getting tangled and tripping each other up; ideas that he’d get frustrated , that he’d be upset or turned off when he learned of your… naivete, that he’d leave you or worse push you, and then you’d have to leave him . But that wasn't the case, Ronin was, and is , ever the gentleman, and the more time you spend with him the safer you feel , murderous proclivities or not. 

When you'd pulled back from Ronin early on in the relationship, put his wandering hands back into more safe places while you were making out, he'd kept them there. He'd still kissed you in the same brutal, breathless way he did before, making you feel like he was pulling the breath from your very lungs into his own, but he never crossed the non-verbal line you'd set.

You hadn't talked to him about it yet, you weren’t sure you could, because even though he was your boyfriend the thought made you shudder with a strange mixture of anticipation and anxiety . There were too many ‘what if’s, it felt too big a topic to broach on your own and you were scared . You knew you should talk about it, knew you had to talk about it at some point, that Ronin would be nothing but understanding. But every time the thought to bring it up had crossed your mind you couldn’t get the words to cross your lips, couldn’t get over how shy the topic made you feel.

You'd expected-no, you’d hoped that Ronin would try again as the relationship progressed, considering you were too shy to even bring the topic of sex up, but you both never went past making out. Not even after you’d finally gotten frustrated enough that you'd tried putting his hands on you, tried to slide them from your lower back to your butt subtly but Ronin had just leaned back from marking up your neck and said, ‘What is it, baby? What do you want? You got an itch that you need help scratching?’ In that teasing drawl of his, and scraped his fingernails slowly but firmly over the back of your thigh, bypassing your ass completely.  

You didn't know how to handle that ; you’d prepared for him grabbing your ass or something similar and this was the complete opposite. It wasn’t what you had expected him to do, leaving you feeling wildly unprepared so your brain went haywire trying to decide how to react and then it just kind of… shut off. 

Your brain had frozen and you hadn’t known what to do, what to say, how to say it. So you’d just squeaked and wrapped your arms around Ronin’s head, squished his face harshly against your collarbone so he couldn't look up and see how red you'd turned as you'd spluttered out something to the affirmative, scratched your own ass, and then scrambled off him and ran away to hide in the toilet out of embarrassment. You could hear Ronin positively screeching with laughter as you scurried out of the room and away from him. 

When you came back in five minutes later Ronin was sat sprawled out on the couch, a movie you liked already queued up and ready to go on the television as he patted his thigh, inviting you to come back and melt into him with a smug smile tugging at the edges of his lips like he knew. 

Which, retroactively, it’s clear he did know what you wanted, he was just playing with you; Ronin wanted you to admit it. Admit how crazy he drove you, how much you wanted him. He was teasing you, that much was obvious, especially considering the movie he'd had queued up wasn't one that suited his usual gore-happy festivities, more in line with ‘that childish shit’ that he always groaned and complained about when you ‘forced’ him to sit through it. 

You've tried again a few times since then; tried putting Ronin’s hands on your ass when making out and holding them there for a second, but they always wandered back to safer locations after a second, sliding on up to your back, your shoulders, your tummy, and your neck after giving your ass what felt like a precursory squeeze, like nothing more than an acknowledgement that it was there; then you tried putting your leg up over Ronin’s hip after his kisses had made your skin thrum with electricity and turned your clit hard and aching, throbbing in time with your pussy but Ronin’s hips never seemed to connect with yours- no matter how much you squirmed and tried to grind against him without overtly just humping him; you’d tried whining, ‘Roninnnn. Ronin, please…’ against his lips, eyes tearing up with how much you wanted him and voice a breathless whine but Ronin had just groaned. Turned his head away from yours with his eyes screwed shut like the movement was hurting him, lips disconnected from yours with a shiny string of spit strung between them, his fingers tracing up and down your sides as he'd said, fervently, mockingly, ‘What, baby? What do you want? Come on and tell me. Tell the devil what you want, darlin’.’ His voice had turned serious, slipping into an airy murmur of ‘won’t hold it against you, bunny, promise,’ pressed softly to your temple.

You'd have been offended if you hadn't seen how much you were affecting him too. If you hadn't felt Ronin’s hips grind into yours before he halted the movement, if he hadn't tucked his head down against your neck to suck a bruise as you’d gasped and stuttered, if he hadn’t licked a stripe up your throat, dipping up to nip at your lips gently before saying, ‘Tell me, darlin’, c’mon, you can do it. I believe in you.~’ 

You'd stared into Ronin’s eyes, dark with want and need , his forehead pressed to yours as you’d licked your lips, mouth opening and closing as you made several aborted attempts to try and tell him while you quivered under the weight of his gaze and your voice had died in your throat. Eventually, Ronin’s gaze had softened, and he'd pressed a gentle kiss to your lips, and then your forehead, before he'd tucked you safely into his chest and murmured, ‘next time then, yeah?’ 

You'd barely had time to process your disappointment before he'd wrapped his arms around you and rolled you both over so that you were facing the television, and then you'd had to sit through the second half of a slasher movie so turned on you couldn’t think , trying not to squirm and cry in his arms at being denied again. 

You'd known what he wanted then, you just couldn’t do it. The same way you know what he wants now, the same thing as then: for you to ask him. And Ronin's a patient man, one who takes some kind of sadistic glee in watching you squirm ; he's not going to give it to you unless you ask him to. You know this . So you're going to. Ask him, that is. Today. Right now. Any second now . 

You’ve already interrupted his ongoing rambling monologue about some ‘scum sucking bottom feeder’ he’s been stalking, now you just need to tell him. Any second now. While Ronin's still semi-distracted by his love of the hunt you're going to say what you want loud and clear, before he gets the chance to upset your determination with his touch, before you have a chance to get shy you're gonna tell him. 

You open your mouth; no words come out. You try again and fail to produce any sound a second time. Third time’s the charm. Come on. You can do this. ‘Ro-ronin.’ You stutter out.

Ronin hums, his hand tracing little circles on your upper back as he says, ‘Yeah, baby? What’s up?’ His voice is light, airy . You’re thinking that you’ve gotten off easy with him being so distracted when Ronin continues, ‘What’s so important that you just had to interrupt me, even though I know you’ve not been listening for the past half hour. What’s eating at that pretty little head of yours?’

You wriggle slightly where you’re laid on top of him, squirming from your discomfort. It’s now or never. Your face is aflame, you’re steadfastly looking anywhere that isn’t Ronin. You take a deep breath before, ‘Ronin-I’m-a-virgin-but-I-think-it-would-be-really-cool-if-you-could-sex-me-up-sometime-soon-maybe-now-please-and-thank-you,’, comes out in one big rush. You immediately bury your face in the soft cotton of his shirt after and pray he won’t make you say it again. There's silence for a beat, and you cringe . Your shoulders are retreating up towards your ears when you feel Ronin’s chest stutter then start to heave before he releases a manic cackle from above you. 

‘What was that, darlin’? You want me to ‘sex you up?’ Ronin doesn't bother to stifle the snicker that breaks free as he says the words. Oh God, you did say that, didn’t you? This has not gone well; you practiced in your head so much and yet you still asked him to ‘sex you up’. Jesus. …You kind of want the ground to split open and swallow you whole.

Ronin’s still giggling when he tries to pull your face away from his chest to look at you, but you shake your head frantically and tuck it incrementally lower, covering your face with your hands. You’re embarrassed , and maybe a little ashamed . ‘ Don’t be getting shy on me now, darlin’ . You finally told me what you want . Don’t you want me to give it to you? ’ One of his hands slides under your jaw and tips your head up to look at him, the other gently pulls your hands away from your face.

There’s an undisguised glee on Ronin’s face when you make eye contact with him but his expression falters at the look on your face. ‘ Baby? ’ Ronin slides his hand up to cup the side of your face and brushes a thumb along the tears gathering in your lower lashes. ‘Oh.’ His eyebrows knit together. ‘We need to talk , huh?’ You sniffle, try to blink back your tears as you nod at him shortly, refusing to make eye contact with him. You wipe your eyes and laugh wetly at how silly you feel, crying over something like this. 

Ronin shifts on the couch, shuffles himself up into a sitting position and uses the arm locked around your waist to bring you with him. Sitting up like this you can see the concern laced into his eyebrows. You raise your hand to try and smooth them out but Ronin catches it and presses a kiss to your knuckles instead. 

‘Why didn’t you just talk to me?’ It’s short and succinct. Ronin does not like talking about his problems, preferring to talk around them or to hide his truths in poetry but when it comes to you , he’s always to the point. He’s always willing to try . You love him for that- you love him for a myriad of reasons but you especially love that he’s willing to try for you. To sit with emotions that he hasn’t so much as looked at in years, even if it makes him uncomfortable.

It’s with that thought in mind that you rearrange so that you’re sat on Ronin, facing him as you twiddle your thumbs together and say, ‘I wanted to . I kept trying , but the words wouldn’t come out and I didn’t know what to say, or how to say it so I tried to show you but that didn’t work and… I got in my head about it. I was worried you wouldn’t want me-

‘ That’s stupid.’ Ronin cuts in.

‘Ronin .’ You say, upset.

‘I’m always going to want you. I- love you. Innocent little lamb or not.’

‘Oh.’ You say, the feeling catching in your throat and sitting there. You feel like you’re going to cry for real this time. Ronin leans in and presses a kiss against your cheekbone, just under your eye. You chase after him and catch his lips in a soft kiss, leave your forehead pressed to his when you pull back, eyes closed. ‘I- I just, I’m shy and it- I have trouble- I can’t talk about these things like you can, it’s not easy for me and then you kept rejecting me-’

‘Who said I was rejecting you?’ Now Ronin sounds hurt. You open your eyes and there’s this look of disbelief on his face, a subtle upset sitting in the crease of his brows, his wide eyes, and his open mouth. He looks… heartbroken by the idea , like hurting you was the last thing he wanted and he didn’t even know he was doing it; because you didn’t tell him. A tear escapes confinement and slides down your cheek.

‘Ronin, baby, I-’ You cup his face, look into his eyes and try to gather your courage before burying yourself in his neck to hide as you say, ‘I wanted you to touch me and I kept trying but you just ignored it and I thought it was fine but it’s not ; I want you to want me.’ Your voice breaks as you choke out the last couple words.

You feel Ronin’s shoulders judder as he takes in a shuddering breath. He presses a hand against the back of your head and holds you close to him, ‘I do want you. Want you so much I can barely breathe for it, darlin’. …I just wanted to hear you say it, didn’t mean to push you so far you broke .’ You hear him inhale again, the breath irregular and prolonged compared to the normal slow rise and fall of his chest; you realise with a start that Ronin’s mimicking the breathing techniques you always do when the world gets too much and you can’t feel anything except for it closing in on you. You wonder if this feels like that for him… 

‘Listen, darlin’, where I came from, that godforsaken shithole of a town- where I- escaped, there were-’ Ronin stops for a second, and you think he’s choking up before he voice returns with a vengeance and a venom you’ve never heard before, ‘these men, shit stained, self-proclaimed saints, prostrating God with one hand, doing reprehensible shit with the other behind closed doors. Scumbags who took too much, who got anything they wanted, everyone else’s wishes be damned. I can’t-’ Ronin cuts himself off, looks away with tension in his jaw and a furrow in his brow. ‘I won’t be like them, ever. No matter what.’ He spits with venom. ‘That’s how I became The Butcher in th’ first place.’ Ronin starts tracing slow circles on one of your thighs, when he speaks again his voice is clearer, lighter. ‘Someone needed t’ put them in their place. Make ‘em understand that heaven isn’t open to them, bring a little slice of hell into their lives- their deaths more like.’ He barks out a laugh, the sound thick with emotion and edged with delight. ‘…Show ‘em what it’s like to be on the other end of the stick.

‘So I- I get that you’re shy, darlin’. ‘M not saying you hav’ta spell everythin’ out f’me, I jus’ need you to give me somethin’.’ Ronin looks down at you, tilts your head up to look at him and you wonder if there’s as much emotion on your face as there is on his; you feel peeled open, raw. ‘Some kinda confirmation, a yes, some kind of proof that you want this as much as I do.’ 

‘Yeah, okay… That makes sense. I’m sorry. I- didn’t mean to bring up bad memories for you. I should have tried talking to you about it, not just… y’know . It’s just- this is hard for me.’

‘Nah, darlin’. I could’ve brought this up at anytime, I w’s just having too much fun playing with you to realise we needed to talk about it. ‘S much as my fault as it‘s yours.’ Ronin says.

You nod softly, ‘We’ve kind of been putting each other through it, huh? It’s almost funny .’ You cut yourself off with a wet giggle, sniffle and wipe your nose on the back of your hand. ‘I didn’t- didn’t realise it was affecting me this much, but I- um, I can try be more um, forward about what I’m wanting. For you.’ You fiddle with the fabric of his shirt, twist it in your hands. 

‘That’s all I’m askin’ for, darlin’, a little communication.’ One of Ronin’s hands snakes over yours and grips your fingers, gentle, ‘You’re gonna ruin my shirt, baby.’ Your hands pause in their fidgeting until Ronin pulls one of them into his own, presses the pads of his fingers against yours and slides them to and fro, pushing and pulling your fingers together and apart with his own. 

You’re silent for a moment, content to watch Ronin play with your hand and sit here and feel close to him before you open your mouth to speak, ‘So you’re okay that I'm a- that I haven’t -? Me tell-telling you hasn’t um- turned you off, has it? ’ The last part comes out in a squeak , embarrassed even now to hear yourself say it , even with Ronin already knowing , waiting so patiently while you gathered your nerves, thumb rubbing soothing little motions at the base of your neck . 

‘Darlin’, we’ve been dating for four months now. I figured it out week two when I tried to kiss you with a little tongue and you choked. ’ You feel Ronin’s chest shake where your head is pressed against it as he stifles a laugh at the memory. You flush beet-red as you recall the memory, it having been one you stuffed far down in the deepest, darkest crevasses of your mind and tried with all your might to pretend didn’t exist.

It was the first time you’d felt comfortable getting hot and heavy with Ronin since your meet up in Purgatory. He hadn’t even put his tongue in your mouth really, just licked over your lower lip and brushed his tongue against your own, testing. And when you felt the sweet, warm press of it you had panicked , choked on your own spit, hacked a cough against his face and then had to go get a glass of water to be able to breathe again. 

Ronin had nearly died laughing at the time,. He’d then pulled you close and called you his, ‘poor, sweet, innocent baby.’ Said, ‘was that too much for you, sweetheart?’ …Oh. At the time you’d brushed it off as lighthearted teasing but he really did know. And he’d treated you exactly the same afterwards, to the point you hadn’t noticed anything had changed. 

You cringe outwardly at the memory, face scrunching up as you whine, ‘Ronniiiinnnnnn.’ 

‘What?’ Ronin says, ‘It was cute. My sweet little saint getting all worked up over a little kiss. Can’t wait to see how you react when I kiss you in other, more fun places.’ Ronin’s grin is sharp as he nips at The edge of your jaw playfully. 

You squirm in his lap, whine, ‘Roninnn,’ again and pretend to try push him away, but you don’t actually let him go anywhere with one arm hooked around the back of his neck. Ronin laughs at your antics, arms wrapped around your torso supporting you, he blows a raspberry just under your jaw, causing you to shriek and actively try to actually push him away from you by his shoulders but now he’s the one locked onto you and he won’t budge, he’s just too strong. ‘’Roninnnnn ewwwwwwwww, grosss!’ You screech and he chuckles .

Ronin kisses his way up to your ear and murmurs, ‘I’ll stop if you ask nicely , darlin’.’ He immediately goes back to blowing kisses wetly against your neck.

You squeal, wriggle desperately in his grasp and gasp out, ‘Ronin, please ! Stoppppp, come onnnnnn!’

Ronin cackles next to your ear, ‘Since you asked me so nicely, baby, I’ll stop.’ He leans back against the arm of the couch, grinning, ‘can’t believe you didn’t like my love kisses! and I made them just for you ‘n’ all, darlin’.’ 

‘Those were not ‘love kisses’ and you know it . There was no love in them! Those were evil kisses.’

‘Oh yeah? Good thing I’m th’ devil then.’ Ronin looks so cocky when he says it, you’d think he set it up if you didn’t already know how quick witted your boyfriend is. ‘But… what makes you so sure, baby? Why don’t you come over here and show me what a real ‘love kiss’ is like, huh? Since you’re such an expert ‘n’ all.‘ Ronin leans all the way back against the arm of the couch, arms stretched out behind his head, looking for everything like he’s king of the world. He’s king of your world at least. It’d piss you off if it didn’t turn you on so much. He’s playing with you again, and you walked right into his well laid trap. Your clit twitches in your pants at the mere idea of what Ronin’s implying, but you find yourself frozen under the weight of your own want. 

There’s about a yard of empty space hanging in between your torsos from where you’re sat on his lap, and even though you want this you hesitate to cross the empty space between you both. Ronin’s smug grin fades slightly, gets replaced with the ghost of a concerned frown as he sits up a little. ‘You uh- you okay if I tease you about it, darlin’? The whole,’ he waves his hand around in the air, drawing imaginary circles, ‘virginity thing, right? ‘S like, you’re shy , it’s not like- not a wound or anything, darlin’? Not gonna hurt you if I poke , right?’

You shake your head no, Ronin taps you on your chin and says, ‘words , baby. Can’t read your mind no matter how much I want to.’

You press your lips together before saying, quietly, ‘You- you can tease me. I- I like it.’ The last part is whispered like the admission it is and Ronin’s usual shit eating grin starts to stretch back over his face. He leans up into your space, puts one hand under your ass and the other against your back to pull you fully on top of him while he lays back on the couch. 

Ronin cackles a laugh in your ear as he chatters away saying, ‘I knew you liked it, haha! Knew you liked me, baby. Just had to get you to admit it. Always thought there was a dirty little sinner under all that innocent, saintly outlook. Hells, bet you’re fucking filthy, aren’t ya’, darlin’? Wonder what else I can get you to admit to. Next you’re gonna start saying that my crowbar turns you on and I’ll find you following me out to Purgatory to get a little sneak-peak at the devil in action.’ He keeps snickering between his words; Ronin’s practically purring with excitement at having you in his lap, secure in the knowledge that he can tease you as much as he wants and that you’ll like it, that like him.

It feels like half the blood in your body rushes to your face as you flush beet red, the abruptness of it combined with Ronin saying these things about you makes you dizzy and causes you to sway towards Ronin slightly, the other half rushes straight to your clit like you’ve been electrified and it almost hurts the arousal that shoots through you. Your first instinct is to hide from Ronin when your clit twitches to life between your legs but sat on his lap like this there’s nowhere to hide. You’re exposed , and the thought raises goosebumps along your arms and legs that Ronin’s watching you , seeing and feeling every aroused twitch and wiggle of your hips no matter how you try to control them.

Ronin watches you go red, sees you curl around your arousal like you’re trying to protect it and then straighten up like you’re pretending it isn’t happening, and he barks out a laugh, ‘Awh, my sweet little saint, precious little lamb; I’m gonna corrupt your sweet little aorta until it’s all bloody and bleeding and perfect, just for me, sweetheart.‘ Ronin’s nibbling at you as he says all this, nipping at your ear gently, scraping his teeth over your pulse point, stopping to kiss your lips, licking into your mouth and then biting when you try kiss him back, it’s overwhelming. 

You may be sat on Ronin but you can feel him everywhere around you and you don’t know how to handle it. You whine high in the back of your throat, break the noise off into a whimper when you feel Ronin press his sharp grin against the crook of your neck, scrape his teeth there and say, ‘You like that, baby?’ You nod rapidly and Ronin laughs breathily against your neck in response. You can’t stifle the turned on wiggle that happens where you’re seated over his hips but you think he doesn’t notice. 

You’ve got your hands braced on his shoulders when Ronin finally lets up and lets you catch your breath. You staring down at him, chest rising and falling sporadically when Ronin says, ‘You’re this worked up over a little kissing? Awh, baby. You’re out of your fucking depth; I’m going to devour you.‘

You whimper , the words shooting right to your clit as Ronin’s grin gets impossibly sharper. Ronin’s a man of his word , and you shudder as all the possibilities of what he could mean run through your mind. How do you even reply to that? You can’t , all you can do is look at him, mouth opening and closing as you desperately try to think of what to say and come up with nothing.  

You bite your lip, try stifle the rocking motion that’s rolling through your hips with a vengeance, not wanting to show how worked up you’ve gotten over ‘a little kissing’. Ronin glances down between your bodies pointedly, raises an eyebrow and says, ‘I can feel that, baby. Dont’cha know?’, while grinning. The expression softens as he says, ‘You don’t need to hide from me, darlin’. I want to see you, all of you.’ Ronin puts his hands on your hips and encourages them to roll down against his own. He then leans up and kisses you, softly, sweetly, pulls back like it’s the last thing he wants to do and goes, ‘Hey. Hey. Maul me.’ before snapping his teeth at the air between you. You jump, startled before giggling at him.

‘You’re ridiculous.’ You say, before leaning down and brushing your nose against his.

‘Yeah, but you love me, so who’s really the ridiculous one here?’ Ronin kisses you on the cheek, and you can feel the sharp edges of his grin brush against your skin as he whispers, ‘well? Sweetheart, what are you going to do?’ 

Ronin leans back, looks at you with a challenge in his eyes that he already knows you’re going to fail. You lean down and kiss him, press your lips to his and lick into his mouth with a vengeance, feel his tongue brush your own and shudder. Your hands slide down from his shoulders to his chest. Ronin lets you take the lead in kissing him, leaves his hands pressed gently on your hips as you roll them down against his own. 

The shiny vinyl of his jeans is bunched up around the zipper and the pressure feels good where your cunt lips part around it. The fabric of your underwear is wedged up around your clit causing a delicious friction, it rubs and pulls at it as you rock over him. The sensation burns in a way you're both familiar with and totally foreign to; the pleasure tinglingly reminiscent of the times you’ve spent rubbing your clit while thinking of your boyfriend in private, but turned up in a manner that's overwhelming by the simple weight of Ronin’s hands on your hips, the dark heady gaze of his eyes on you as you rock against him. 

It’s an unbearable tease, there’s this heat that’s sparking along your clit every time your hips roll down against him, and it feels good , too good, and so you can’t quite control the movement. Everytime your hips roll down they twitch and stutter when they connect with his and you just can’t quite get the rhythm right, it’s frustrating but at least you feel in control of the movement, not panicked or unsure for once .

You’re just about feeling capable when Ronin’s hands slide up to cover your own and readjust them where they’re braced on his chest so that you’re cupping his pecs, and then he squeezes . You feel the soft-firm flesh of his chest shift under the pressure of your hands, feel the pebble of his nipples through the thin cotton of his shirt and you whimper . Try pull your hands away in a panic, then abort that movement and try press them closer because you want this, want him; you don’t want to keep running away . 

Ronin’s hands stay pressed firmly over your own the entire time, so he feels the back and forth twitching pull of your arms, feels when your mouth slips away from his, your focus elsewhere and he laughs , breath puffing over your face before he’s seeking out your lips to kiss you hard and suddenly the tables are turned. You may be on top of Ronin but his mouth is a hot and heavy seeking pressure against yours. He brushes his tongue over your lower lip, coaxing your tongue out to play with his. His hands are shifting over yours, directing them, encouraging you to squeeze, to brush your palms and then fingers over his nipples with purpose and suddenly you are out of your depth.  

You whine, break away from his lips, needing a moment to catch your breath. Ronin’s laid back, panting and grinning below you. His hands slip up your arms, leaving a fiery trail of goosebumps as they skate over your shoulders and then down your front to sit on your waist. ‘You want this , baby? You want me?’ Ronin brushes his hands down to your hips, uses his grip there to grind you over his crotch again, then he rolls his own hips up into the motion and you choke. Breath catching in your throat as your mind floods with images of him fucking up into you as you ride his cock. The thought, combined with the motion of his hips under yours is so erotic and so  that you're suddenly caught in the reality that this is happening. You're going to have sex . With Ronin. Sex . With Ronin. Right now.

A wave of heat washes over you, settles hotly over your face, sits heavy on your neck, curls down your spine into a line of tension behind your clit and your hips roll harder into their desperate rocking motion over him. With Ronin steadying the rock of your hips against him the constant friction against your clit blooms into a hot pulse that concentrates in your clit but sweeps across your whole cunt.

‘I need an answer, sweetheart, a simple ‘yes’ will do... Although I'm not gonna stop you if you wanna say ‘please, Ronin, master and maestro of my heart, body, and soul, make me yours, put your thick cock in my greedy little cunt and make me see God’.’ Ronin's grinning, spewing absolute filth from his mouth now that he knows you want to hear it, viscerally enjoying watching you squirm above him as heat creeps along your spine and your clit twitches in interest at his words. The only evidence that he’s not just making fun of you is in the breathless tone to his words, the red flush settled high over his cheekbones, and the way his gaze keeps dipping between you both to where he’s got you rutting your clit against his crotch.

Your mouth opens and shuts repeatedly, words lost somewhere under the want that's crawling along underneath your skin and settling heavy in your stomach, pulsing behind your clit and making your cunt clench around nothing as you imagine clenching around Ronin . Imagine rubbing your pussy over his stomach and his hips and his cock. Imagine slotting your cunt against his cock in a wet sticky kiss and rutting against him, feeling every wet twitch and kiss of his cunt against yours until one of you cums and the other gets to feel the hot slick pulse of it against them. Even just thinking about it feels unnervingly good like this. You want to cum like this, with him, on him, any way that he’ll have you even.

Ronin looks at you, calculating, and then leans up to kiss you sweetly. Presses his lips to yours all gentle like and then kisses his way softly across your jaw and down your neck to lave his tongue there. You shudder at the sensation, whine and tilt your head back to give him space to work. You feel his grin against your neck as you shudder with want, feel him kiss you there again and then suck a wet kiss over the spot before he starts whispering, lips ghosting over your neck, ‘Come on, baby. Don’t you want me to spread some of my rot to you? Gonna look at the devil and ask for his sacrament? Want me to defile you, baby? Ruin you in the eyes of God? C’mon, baby, darlin’, sweetheart. All you've got to do is ask. I wanna hear you say it.’

Ronin leans back and looks at you, eyebrows raised, waiting. You swallow the nerves collecting in your throat. You want this so badly it’s overriding the red flush on your face, sidestepping the anxiety in your brain, and overpowering everything in your body that says that you can’t do this, because you can. You're going to. You desperately want to look away from Ronin’s gleeful gaze but you’re stuck, trapped, caught in Ronin’s orbit, and you can’t get out. You know he’ll just pull you right back in if you do anyway. 

You lick your lips before you manage to stutter out, ‘Ronin, can-’ You stop.

‘Go on.’ 

 ‘Will you-’ You cut yourself off, face flushing red hot.

‘Keep going .’

‘I want-’ You breathe out, your hips rolling down against him of their own accord .

‘Nearly there .’

Somehow , you manage to whimper out, ‘ defile me, please, Ronin.’   

‘ There we go. Feel better now?’

You nod shyly , look at Ronin then abruptly look away, you can’t hold his gaze . He’s grinning proudly, a heavy, lovesick look to him as he sits you both up slowly, then taps his hand against your knee and says, ‘up,’ to get you to climb off him before standing up himself. Ronin holds a hand out to you, you look between him and his hand in confusion before taking it. He levers you off of the couch and into his arms, wraps them around you before kissing you sweetly, ‘Can’t have me taking y’r innocence on the couch now , darlin’. ‘S hardly a place to be defiled .’ Ronin snickers to himself before dramatically sweeping an arm underneath your knees and tipping you back into a bridal carry.  

You shout in a mixture of surprise and indignation, ‘Ronin!’, smack his arm in protest but he just laughs loudly as he carries you through to the bedroom.

‘What baby? If I’m gonna be taking your virtue I may as well do it properly ‘n’ all. I’m just paying my respects , playing the role of dutiful, doting husband ‘n’ carrying you ‘cross the threshold.’ Ronin’s laughing the entire time he says it, but you can’t help but wonder if there’s a thread of truth to what he’s saying. That is until he rouses you from your suspicions by kicking the bedroom door open with a ‘bang’, and grinning at your proudly before walking through.

‘Who knew that Ronin Beaufort, the devil’s butcher, was such a romantic, huh?’ You kiss the side of his face, nuzzle into his neck and feel his throat vibrate as he laughs.

‘Heh, only the best for my baby .’ It’s sarcastic, but you know he means it as he lays you gently down on the bed and crawls over you with a lovesick grin. You put your arms around his neck and pull him down to kiss him. Ronin’s smiling the whole time and he has to press his grin to the side of your face a couple times to get it under control before he can kiss you properly. When he pulls back, he pulls back slowly , runs a hand down the side of your tummy, traces his fingers over your lower stomach in teasing little circles. 

‘R’ninnnnnn, don’t tease me.’ You say.

Ronin’s grin gets impossibly sharper, looking for everything like he wants to devour you, before his eyes soften and he rubs his thumb gently over your cheek. ‘I’m going to love you, darlin’.’ He says it with intent, voice getting airy over the words ‘love you’ and you’re reminded once again that no matter how he denies it, your boyfriend is a desperate, hopeless romantic, and you wouldn’t have him any other way. You never had a single thing to be worried about. This is Ronin, and he loves you. 

Ronin leans in and kisses you gently, he scrapes his teeth over your bottom lip as he pulls back. ‘Do you know what you want , baby? Or do you want me to try and find out ?’ His voice dips deeper as he says the second sentence, as slides his fingers beneath the waistband of your underwear and pings it against your tummy. 

You wriggle slightly underneath him, bite your lips and say, ‘I want you , ‘Nin.’ 

Ronin chuckles, ‘Yeah, I know that , baby, but where do you want me? Here?’ He presses his lips to your neck, ‘or, here?’, then to your collarbone, ‘maybe, here?’, Ronin rucks your shirt up around your tummy and leaves it sitting just under your chest, brushes his lips over the bottom of your ribcage, staring at you all the while, ‘down here?’ He brushes his lips above the line of your underwear, ‘lower?’ Ronin asks cheekily, rubs his nose just under your belly button while waiting for a response.

‘’Nin…’ You say, bottom lip worried between your teeth, ‘Please ?’ You ask succinctly, and lift your hips towards him to make your point. Ronin grins at you, wolfish, before tucking his fingers in the edge of your underwear and sliding them down your hips. Your face burns a cherry red as you lift your hips to help him and your cunt is exposed to his gaze for the first time ever. 

You fidget, try to close your legs as subtly as you can but Ronin grabs you by the ankles and gently pulls your legs apart, slides himself between your knees until he’s propped up on his elbows in front of your pussy. You’re waiting for him to touch you, clit twitching and pussy drooling under the weight of his gaze, but when Ronin does nothing but look you start to squirm in place. 

‘Ronin? Baby?’ You ask, voice meek and nervous. Ronin’s head snaps up to look at you and this is maybe the first time you’ve really seen him since this whole thing started. His pupils are blown , with this dazed glaze like sure he’s looking at you but his focus is elsewhere, preoccupied. Namely on your cunt, given the way his gaze keeps flitting between looking at you and looking at it, like he can’t keep away. His mouth is a bitten red, shiny with spit from where he’s been kissing you and his gaze is half lidded, boring into you and heavy with want when it manages to stay on your face for more than a second. 

The whole thing is maybe one of the most erotic things you’ve even seen in your life and you can’t stop yourself from squirming where you’re laid, undulating out from the spine and rocking your hips towards Ronin’s face as you whine, desperate and high pitched in the back of your throat before you manage to pant out, ‘’Niiiinnn, touch me? Please? Pretty please?’ 

Ronin doesn’t answer you, just groans, head dipping down, seemingly in pain , before he looks up to catch your eye and leans down so that his lips are just barely brushing over your clit, teasing you, again. You’ve had enough of his teasing, can’t withstand the ghosting sparks of pleasure where his lips brush, you can’t stop yourself; you keen , one of your hands lands on the back of Ronin’s head as you rock your hips up to connect with his waiting mouth. 

You feel Ronin’s moan vibrate through you where his spit shiny lips part against your cunt and his tongue presses hot and insistent over your clit. You can’t stop the rock of your hips against his face, grinding your clit into his tongue. If this felt any less good maybe you’d have some semblance of self-control but his mouth is hot, wet, and slippery, burning fire against your clit and it’s all you can do to ride the feeling out against the heat of it. Gasp and cry as he licks around and then over your clit, presses wet sucking kisses against it as you gasp and cry out at the feeling. You can’t think for how good this feels, you’re near consumed with your want for more. More of Ronin, more of his mouth, more of his love. You’re damn near insatiable.

Ronin pulls back for a second, opens his mouth to ask you something but you think you might cry at the loss of sensation as the cold air comes into contact with your wet clit and electricity zaps through it, stinging . You gasp, ‘ no! -’ before you can think to stop it, make a sound like you’re bereaved , scratch your fingernails over the back of Ronin’s head and lift your head up to make watery eye contact with him. 

Ronin’s grinning ferally , the skin around his mouth is rubbed red and there’s a shiny wetness from your cunt covering his chin. ‘Awh, darlin’ , somebody’s desperate.’ Ronin cackles, high pitched in the back of his throat but he must be feeling kinder than usual, or you must look as desperate as he says because he leans back down and places a loud smacking kiss on your clit before cackling a laugh again, and then he presses his wet lips over your clit and sucks it into his mouth while looking you in the eyes.

Your head hits the pillow with a thump, holding his gaze proving too much as you start to whimper and break into high pitched moans. You rut your cunt against his face as his tongue laves wet and rough over your pussy, between your folds, and wraps wetly over your clit. You can’t help the moans that escape you as Ronin kisses wetly at your cunt, seals his mouth over your clit and rubs his tongue against the bottom of it as he pulls back with a wet suckling motion. You can feel his head bobbing back and forth minutely between your legs, ‘Ronin, ah- fuck, Ronin I can’t- ’ You break off into a long moan, press your clit harder against his mouth, feel it twitch aggressively against his tongue before you start to come on his face.

Your orgasm hits you like a thundering truck; your vision blurs around the edges, your eyes squeeze shut and a hoarse moan is ripped from your throat as the pleasure crests and washes over you. It twitches through your thighs and convulses in your shoulders, rocks through your hips in a fizzing rush that funnels to your clit as it pulses against Ronin’s tongue. Your head slams back against the pillow, and your feet dig into the bed beneath you as your hips surge up off the bed. You can hear Ronin growling low in his throat, and the noise sends another shuddering wave of pleasure through you as one of his arms unwraps from around your thigh and slams over your hips, holding you down against the bedspread as you start to twitch from over sensitivity. 

Ronin sucks at your clit one last time as you tremble against him before you go limp in his hold and he dips his head down to lick over your entrance. Your cunt pulses with aftershocks, gushes slick out against Ronin’s face, clenching around nothing as he licks down the crease of your pussy to catch some of it, tongue rubbing over your entrance before licking back up to your oversensitive clit. He licks back over it and you whimper in his hold, slot a clumsy, sweaty palm against his face to try make him back off, ‘’Nin! ‘Nin, stoppp, ‘s too much ,’ you slur out.

‘’s too much, Ronin, stop.~ Don’t eat my pussy, don’t suck my dick, don’t make me cum so hard I cry. ‘S so much. I can’t take it, it’s too good-.’ Ronin’s teasing croon  breaks off into a loud cackle. 

He crawls up over you so you’re face to face as you grumble out that you, ‘didn’t cry ’. 

At the sight of Ronin’s grinning face you can’t help but smile dazedly back at him from where you’re laid back against the pillows, even as close your eyes, trying to feign annoyance at his teasing you can’t help but beam and giggle your way through it. ‘Awh, baby, look ,’ Ronin lifts a hand and wipes his thumb against your face, ‘you dribbled. ’ He snickers and leans forward to ask you, ‘That good, huh?’ 

You crack open an eye and try frown at him, grumble out, ‘’Nin , you’re ruining my afterglow,’ but the effect is ruined by the giggles that keep escaping you. Ronin cackles at this. Flops himself down beside you and snuggles in at your neck, wrapping an arm over you. You can’t help but burrow closer in his hold, snuggle into him and tuck yourself up under his chin as you laugh; you’re maybe a little giddy off the endorphin rush.

‘So sorry, darlin’. How rude of me. Not like I was th’ one who put you in it in the first place or nothin.’ You can feel Ronin’s voice rumbling through his chest as he talks. ‘Nah, I’m simply a bystander in the best sex of your life, you don’t even need me,’ He flops himself backwards dramatically, throws an arm over his eyes and sighs huffily before continuing, ‘you did this all by yourself, I wasn’t even necessary, nay, it would have been better if I wasn’t here at all-’

‘Oh my Gods , Ronin, shut the hell up!’ You’re laughing as you say it, which takes the bite out of the words but the message still stands, considering that Ronin can and will go on for hours when he gets like this. You slap him on the chest jokingly to emphasise your point.

‘You wound me!’ Ronin clasps his hands over his heart, lifting and then dropping himself onto the bed with a bounce, pretending to actually be hurt. 

You giggle, roll onto your tummy and shake him, laughing as you wail, ‘Oh Gods , what have I done? Ronin? Ronin , baby, speak to me.’ 

Ronin’s laying flat on his back, eyes shut, tongue stuck out his mouth comically, seemingly unaffected by your vigorous shaking. …Which is why you’re not expecting it when he abruptly sits up and tackles you backwards onto the bed, pressing you down with his body and drawing his fingers down your sides to tickle you. You shriek and try wriggle away from him, laughing breathlessly as you try escape. 

You shout, ‘Ronin! Stoppppp, ‘s not fair!’, legs post-sex limp and failing to kick out as you try make space between your body and his.

Ronin pulls you back down the bed towards him when you manage after he lets you get away. ‘What ? So you can kill me and I can’t even tickle you? ‘S not exactly fair , darlin’.

‘I didn’t actually kill you! Mercy! Mercy please ! You know, Ronin! You know!’ You break off into slightly hysterical giggles, broken up only by how hard you’re breathing. 

Ronin cackles loudly above you before carefully dropping his full weight on top of you, then going limp . ‘Dunno. I feel pretty dead to me.’ 

All your breath rushes out of you with a wheezing huff as Ronin lands on top of you, your arms are pinned, folded between you and you can’t get the traction to push him off of you, ‘ Ninnnn.’ Ronin’s heavy , made of nothing but blood, guts, and sinew but he weighs like stone , effectively trapping you beneath him.

‘What?’ He laughs breathily. ‘I’m dead. Dead people don’t move, baby, don’t’cha know?’ He cackles loudly at his own joke before propping himself up on his elbows, ‘Or’ve you started having regrets about killing me yet, sweetheart? Regret hewing my blood to stone and my bone to rot-’ He breaks off into a mad cackle that you feel vibrate through your chest.

‘Oh please, you were rotten right through before I ever even met you, baby.’

‘Oh , talk dirty to me, darlin’, you’re gonna get me excited here.’ Ronin tucks his face against your collarbone and scrapes his teeth there. The feeling makes you shiver, whine and tilt your head back, bare your neck to his teeth so you can feel it as he moves up to press his grin against you. You brush your hand up the side of Ronin’s neck, press your palm to his jaw and leave it there. He tilts his head and presses a kiss into your palm, murmurs, ‘So, do you want to check my pulse, darlin’? Since ‘m dead an’ all.’ 

You hum, and start to slide your fingers down to his neck to where his pulse point should be but Ronin catches your hand, brings your fingers to his lips and nips them before he smiles at you cheekily, ‘I’ve got a better place for you to feel it, sweetheart.’ He kisses at your fingertips, ‘but first ‘ve got to get naked .’ He wiggles his eyebrows at you dramatically and you huff a laugh at him. Ronin climbs off of you so that he can shuck his trousers down his legs, kicking them off his feet and they go flying off the edge of the bed. You stifle a laugh at his antics; you love your boyfriend, he’s so fucking goofy . 

Ronin’s boxers are red and black in a checkered pattern. You can see where they’re wet and sticking to him from where his cunt has been drooling this whole time . Your clit aches in sympathy and you jump slightly from the sharp sting of it. You’ve seen Ronin in just his shirt and underwear before, but it was always with much more chaste connotations, like going to bed, or after a shower, or just lounging around the house together. Looking at him now , armed with the knowledge you’re going to get to touch him sends tremors up and down your spine and makes you clench your thighs in anticipation. 

Ronin catches you staring at him and you wonder if how much you want him is be showing on your face because he grins before crawling over to catch you in a searing kiss. Your pussy may be slowly fluttering back to life but you’re still feeling lax and floaty from your orgasm so it’s all you can manage to try and keep up as Ronin kisses you bruisingly . You’re left gasping for breath when he pulls back, ‘Baby. Baby, baby, baby .’ He murmurs against your lips, ‘want you to suck my cock, want to cum in your mouth, want to fuck you with my fingers, wanna see if I can make your pretty little pussy squirt ‘n’ make your legs shake again.’ 

You nod rapidly, your breath spilling over his lips in hot bursts, nose bumping his. Ronin’s close enough you can feel his smile as he says, ‘Yeah baby? You want that? Which part? C’mon and tell me why don’t you?’ Ronin’s grinning when he pulls back, testing, seeing if you’re any less shy now that you’ve cum on his face.

Your face floods with colour, and you open your mouth, stutter around a lungful of air, then close it again when absolutely nothing comes out. Your head dips down, breaking eye contact with him before you try again, determined, and you just about manage to squeak out, ‘b-both?’, before your voice dies in your throat. Ronin grins at you, catches your face with both his hands and gives you the most over exaggerated, loud, smacking kiss he can.

‘Where did my sweet, shy baby go, huh? My innocent little lamb? You’re all corrupted now, rotten right through. You want both? To fuck and to get fucked, Jesus would weep, baby. Somebody’s getting greedy.~‘ Ronin sounds ecstatic. ‘What dirty sinner corrupted your sweet little aorta, baby? One little taste of heaven ‘n’ you’re back knocking on the devil’s door to take you there again, huh? Well, I’m sorry to say, darlin’, this road only leads to hell. You can’t go back now. S’ too late. You’re mine.’ Ronin’s teasing you when he says all this, a giddy undercurrent carrying his voice, talking for the sake of hearing himself talk, but there's an element of truth as he says it; like he genuinely believes you’re his and his alone; destined to be bound to him in this life and any others. Or, maybe you just want it to be true. Oh Gods, you’re so in love with him it hurts. 

You bite your lip, lean up into Ronin’s space to kiss him sweetly and tangle your hands in his hair, ‘Wouldn’t the devil take me to hell?’ 

‘Not if he wanted to show every dumbfuck up ‘n heaven what they’re missin’. All the great sex they missed out on while protecting their virtue.’

‘Careful , ‘Nin, someone might hear you and start thinking you like me.’

‘Can’t have that, can we?’ Ronin murmurs, before kissing you softly, his lips stick to yours slightly when he pulls back. You reach over, rub your hands up over his hips and start to lift his shirt. Ronin takes the hint and pulls his shirt over his head so that he’s just wearing his boxers. You sit back and pat your thighs with a shy smile to encourage him to straddle you so he’s sat over your legs. 

Ronin leans in and kisses you as you brush your hands over his abdomen, trace over one of his top surgery scars before teasingly pinching his nipple. It’s meant to be a joke but Ronin gasps into your mouth and his hips twitch, one of his hands comes up to grab your wrist in his strong grasp. A smile curves its way across your face, gleeful at the thought of having something to tease him about for once, ‘Is someone sensitive?’ 

But you‘ve failed to take into account that Ronin has no shame, or if he does it is located somewhere very far from what you’re doing right now because he simply slides a hand to hold you by the back of your neck and says, somewhat gruffly, ‘work’s better if you use your mouth , darlin’.’ 

With Ronin’s hand braced on the back of your neck, guiding you to his chest so you can lick over his nipple, blow cold air against it to watch it pebble and hear him gasp, you’re reminded of who’s really in control here. It makes your clit twitch between your legs as you lick Ronin’s nipple into your mouth, suck gently as an experiment and then harder when you hear him let out a breathy moan above you. You use your other hand to brush over and then tug at his other nipple, want burning through you as you feel Ronin’s hips start to rock down against you at the sensation. 

You detach your lips from his nipple for a second, scrape your teeth against his chest, over where his heart is and start pressing a series of sucking, bruising kisses up towards to his jaw. In between them you ask, ‘Can I…?’ as you ghost your hands over the waistband of his boxers. 

Ronin sounds strained , and a little breathless when he says, ‘Course y’ can darlin’.’  You hold your breath as you slide his boxers over the curve of his ass and down to his knees. His pubic hair bristles as the waistband of his boxers slides over it. Your breath catches in your throat, then releases in a heavy rush as the wet seat of his boxers peels away from his cunt and then you can see it, see him .

Ronin’s pubic hair is dark black, kept neat but still pretty long; it partially obscures the view of his hard cock sticking out from between his folds, dark red at the head and a dusky colour leading up his foreskin. The edges of his cunt are shiny with slick and swollen where they part around it and you wonder for the first time how Ronin’s been waiting this long without going crazy . You feel a little crazy just looking at him; he’s so hard, and you can see his cock twitching under your heated stare. You wonder what it’d be like to suck it, how he’d feel in your mouth, against your tongue, how he’d sound . You think you might be drooling.

‘ Like what you see , baby?’

You only realise you’ve been staring when Ronin’s hand catches you by the chin and tilts your head up to look at him. He looks positively giddy with the attention you’re giving him and you find your mouth is suddenly startlingly dry. Ronin snickers at your expression and says, ‘I’ll take that as a yes .’ Your hands settle against the back of his thighs and he leans his weight back into the touch. ‘Hate t’ break it t’ ya’, sweetheart, but you’re gonna haf’ta let go of me so I get these off, y’know. I know, what a tragedy.’ He reaches down and pings the waistband of his boxers that's currently stretched between his knees. His wrist bumps his cock on the way down and you hear him hiss, watch his hips rock blindly forwards to chase the sensation. 

You rub your hands over his thighs, gaze locked on his, hands brushing over his scars as you mumble something about, ‘don’t want to ‘Nin, just want to touch you. Please let me, please, please baby, I’ll be good -’

If Ronin’s grin could get any wider it would be splitting his face in two; you want to sit in this feeling forever. ‘Are you begging to suck my dick right now? Awh, darlin’, baby ,’ Ronin brushes his thumb over your lower lip, settles his hand to cup your face as he presses his thumb in against your tongue. It’s salty, a little musky in reminder of what you’ve been doing, what you’re currently doing and the thought sends a shiver down your spine. You nod around his thumb, careful to keep your teeth away from it as you lick and try pull it further into your mouth.

Ronin’s expression is edged with something sharp at his mouth settles into a wide, cocky smirk. He looks at you with lidded eyes and says, ‘Is that so? Well, I want to hear you say it. C’mon baby, say ‘Ronin, can I suck your cock, pretty please?’ and I might just let you.’ He takes his thumb out your mouth to give you the chance to speak. 

You’re silent for a second, mouth opening and closing around nothing, thinking no sound is going to make it out until, unexpectedly , ‘Ronin, can I suck your cock, pretty please ,’ escapes from your mouth, whisper quiet yet unbearably loud in the silence of the room. You whimper at the sound of your own voice saying something so dirty , and Ronin‘s smirk cracks into a wide grin. You can feel your heartbeat in your cunt, throbbing in a steady one-two alongside the twitching of your clit. You think all the blood in your body must be down there because your head is swimming with the want that’s coursing through you. 

Ronin presses his thumb back into your mouth, pushes down on your tongue with it, curls his pointer finger under your chin and then nods your head for you . Your bottom teeth scrape against his thumb as he does it so you bite down gently, trapping his thumb for a second before releasing it. Ronin snorts , ‘ Touché,’ before he lets go and shuffles away from you so he can take his boxers off. 

You giggle at the sight because try as he might there is no way humanly possible to make a backwards shuffle with your boxers around your knees look cool . Ronin raises his middle finger at you and makes a rude gesture, sticking his tongue out at you, before he flops onto his side on the bed to detangle his boxer short where he’s somehow got them twisted around his knees.

As you watch him struggle, you realise with a start that you might be kind of totally screwed , because Ronin’s rolled onto his back, his feet tucked up in the air above him, wrestling with his boxer shorts where they’re now caught around his ankles and all you can think about is how much you love him. And love him you must, because the other thing you’re thinking about is that with his legs up in the air like this you can see his ruby red cunt sitting shiny and wet between his legs, and even with him doing his best impression of a dying bug, the sight of him wet and aroused for you, leaking slick down over his asshole and between his cheeks because of you, leaves you breathless and breathing heavy with want.

You sit up and crawl over to him, slide your hands up the back of his thighs and bend his knees towards his head- they don’t go very far, Ronin is anything but flexible, but the movement is satisfying anyways. Makes your clit throb at the sight of his cunt lips slowly parting to the open air as his hole is exposed. You desperately want to taste him, want to feel what it’s like when he cums in your mouth, want him to fuck your face. 

You’re so busy staring at Ronin’s cunt, breathing heavy and rubbing your thighs together to feel them squeeze around your clit that you don’t notice that Ronin’s stopped in his wriggling. ‘...Having fun?’ Ronin sounds amused, like he’s holding back a laugh at how eager you are, the way you can’t keep your hands off of him. You glance away from his cunt for a second to look up at him; Ronin’s flopped his torso to the side to look at you around his legs. From the look on his face Ronin’s barely holding back his laughter, grin stretched over his face, biting his bottom lip, unrestrained glee in his eyes at the way you’ve been feverishly staring at his cunt. 

You’re silent for a second before you start to giggle, leaning heavily against his legs as laughter starts to bubble its way out of you. Ronin bursts into laughter as soon as you do and you’re both incapacitated by it- his legs come down and you end up leaning over on your elbows by the time your giggles abate. ‘Hey, hey, c’mere .’ Ronin calls you up to him. You crawl up and lean over him, he smiles up at you sweetly . ‘Nice t’know you like me ‘n’ all my grotesqueness s’much.’ You splay a hand over his ribcage, sweep it across and tap a steady rhythm over his heartbeat. 

‘I more than like you Ronin, thought I’d been making that pretty clear.’

‘Yeah, yeah, I know. You love me, you wanna fuck me, you can’t live without me, I’m your fix, sweetheart. You just can’t get enough of me.’

You raise your eyebrows at him while waiting for him to finish. ‘Really , ‘Nin?’

‘What? I’m just tellin’ truths, darlin’. Don’t’cha wanna hear it?’ 

You stare at him, unimpressed.

A slow grin stretches across Ronin’s face, ‘I’m only kidding, darlin’! Course I love you. What else d’ya think we’re doing here?’

You try not to smile but your poker face is far worse than Ronin’s so glee creeps onto it nonetheless, ‘I know.~’ You say. ‘Just wanted to hear you say it.’ 

Ronin snorts, ‘ my wicked little trickster ; what devil taught you that one? If you’re not careful you might just stop being a saint .’ He grins at you wickedly, the glint in his eyes letting you know that there’s nothing he would enjoy more. ‘Now , do you love me enough to put my cock in your saintly sweet mouth?’ Ronin starts to part his thighs slowly, clearly going to make a show of it but you have something specific in mind. Something you want so much it makes your heart race and palms sweat to think about it, so you stop him with a hand on his thigh. ‘Baby?’ Ronin looks at you questioningly.

You bite your lip, ‘Actually… I was thinking, maybe… like this?’ You take his hand and pull Ronin upright, lead him to crawl up over you as you lie back against the bedspread. A grin starts to form on Ronin’s face as he realises what you’re getting at.

‘Yeah, baby? You want me to fuck your mouth ?’ You nod minutely, feeling shy at seeing your boyfriend loom over you. He’s beautiful in the way things are when they’re home-made; you think you could worship at his altar forever if he’d agree to be your God. 

Ronin finishes crawling up your body, stops when his knees are by your head and you swallow heavily, nerves collecting in your throat at the sight of his cock, hard and twitching so close to your face, to your mouth . You feel Ronin’s hand card through your hair, ‘You uh- you still okay?’ He asks. Your eyes flicker between his cock and his face, you want this so badly you think you might start drooling, but the weight of Ronin’s gaze fixed on you makes it impossible to speak so instead you nod shyly and run your hands over the hair on Ronin’s thighs. Ronin smiles down at you sweetly before it tips into something edged with danger and your clit pulses with a painful twinge. 

Ronin rubs his thumb over your lower lip, ‘open up then, sweetheart.’ You bite your lip while looking at him, before you slowly let your mouth fall open. ‘ Good bunny.' He edges forwards slightly, adjusts his knees and then his cock is brushing your lips as his hips come down. It's hot to touch, instinctively you lick your lips and your tongue peeks out, brushing against the head of Ronin’s cock. You feel it twitch in interest even at the brief touch and your world narrows when you hear Ronin groan in response. Suddenly, nothing other than Ronin matters- his needs, his pleasure; all you can feel are your hands on his thighs, his hand carding through your hair, his cock bumping your mouth as you lurch forwards the scant few inches between you and try seal your mouth over his cock.

Ronin’s hip rock forwards as you clumsily mouth at his cock, brushing and bumping your lips over it in attempts to get it in your mouth. You hear Ronin chuckle breathlessly above you, and you look up to see him smiling sharply down at you, eyes dark and focused on your face. Ronin bites his lip as he presses his cock into your open mouth, lets it slide in against your waiting tongue as he settles his weight over you, bracing his arms on the wall behind your head. 

The taste of his cock on your tongue is stronger than you expected, musky, and umami flavoured with a bittersweet tang; it’s kind of addicting; you can’t get enough of this, of Ronin. His pubic hair tickling your nose and cheeks, his thighs blockading either side of your head, keeping your focus solely on him, the weight of him, the taste, the feel of his cock twitching against your tongue. 

You whine, a desperate, high pitched noise escaping you as you press your head back into the pillows, put your hands on his ass and push him forwards, encouraging him to use you. Ronin grunts , rolls his hips forwards against your face and his cock drags over your tongue. You relax your jaw, try stretching your mouth open further, push your tongue out against his cock. You hear Ronin moan from above you, his hips pushing down into the feeling.

With your tongue out you can feel the shiny flat line between his cock and his entrance, can taste the slick leaking from his cunt directly . A guttural moan escapes you as it’s leaks into your mouth. Your legs start fidgeting back and forth on the bedspread, and your hips rub back and forth in tiny little circles. You try to suck at Ronin’s cock but you can’t really get the traction with the way your mouth is pinned open. Your tongue just sort of curls around it, so instead you try focus on rubbing your tongue back and forth in rhythm with Ronin’s rutting against your mouth. 

This is exactly what you wanted , Ronin on top of you seeking out his pleasure, feeling like he’s all around you, the slightly helpless feeling that comes with being pinned down by his weight like this; your clit pulses in time with Ronins movements, stings in a way that feels good when you hear the sounds he’s making. You can hear him panting roughly above you, the end of his breaths tinged with rough moans.You open your eyes, you’re not sure when you closed them, but when you open them you are greeted with the glorious sight of Ronin revelling in feeling good . The long line of his tan body is undulating above you, rocking in time with his hips, his mouth is dropped open as he pants and moans, his brows knitted together in pleasure, hazy gaze fixated on your face to where he’s feeding you his cock. 

Your pussy is burning between your legs, desperate for attention, so you subtly remove one of your hands from Ronin’s ass and reach down to press two fingers over the hood of your clit, one on either side as you start to rub back and forth. Ronin’s hips rock back and forth against your mouth, you can feel his cock twitching on the down stroke as he presses it down against your tongue, feel his cunt drooling slick over your chin and a moan slips out as you start to touch yourself.

‘Feelin’ a little impatient , darlin’?’ Ronin’s pants out above you. You try scrunch your eyebrows in confusion and Ronin understands enough to gesture with his head behind him, grins at you sharply and say, ‘I turn you on so much you just couldn’t help yourself , huh, baby?’ You freeze, the movements of your hand stuttering as your face floods with heat and embarrassment for a split second, before Ronin’s cutting across the fog with, ‘Don’t do that. Don’t feel bad , sweetheart. ‘S not how I- ah - meant it.’ 

He grunts and grinds his cock harder against your tongue, gasps out, ‘’s hot. I like it. Like that you’re so into me you can’t stop yourself, like seeing you desperate and whining for me, like hearing you beg for my cock, love watching you suck it, loved eating your pussy, love you-’ Ronin’s words come out breathy and strained, he’s groaning between them, pushing his hips against your face almost frantically. ‘Love you, baby. Love you so much I feel crazy for it, love-’ Ronin breaks off into a desperate moan, gasps and shudders, his arm dropping to its elbow where it’s braced against the wall, hands clenched tight into fists, curving over you as his body starts to twitch and writhe. 

Ronin’s eyes squeeze shut as he cums, his mouth hanging open in a long, drawn out hoarse moan, voice breaking slightly. His entire body is curling with tension above you as he shudders. You scrub your hand against your clit harder, rock your hips into the motion. The sight of Ronin cumming is hot , and you can feel a moan building in the back of your throat and escaping out your open mouth. You feel his cock pulsing against your tongue, feel it rut back and forth against your mouth in tiny, frantic increments compared to the rolling wave of before, taste the wave of slick that escapes from his hole as it pulses and clenches around nothing.

Ronin’s arm slides down the wall slightly as he stops shaking, his cock slips out your mouth and across your cheek as he lists to the side, panting heavily, before he sort of fumbles his way off of you. One of his legs is still laid heavy across your chest as he collapses beside you. You let go of your clit in favour of rolling over and slipping up between his legs, kissing Ronin being the most important thing to you right now.

Ronin’s wearing a dopey sort of grin, high on endorphins and you think this may be the most beautiful you’ve ever seen him, relaxed and sated and happy . Ronin laughs as you nuzzle his face and you end up pressing your lips to the stretched edges of his mouth. 

You press yourself against Ronin, leaning between his legs as you kiss him lazily, your mouths tracing slow shapes against each other. His movements are slow, tracing his fingers up and down your sides. You know he’s just doing it out of instinct, enjoying the feeling of being close to you like this, but your clit is hard and heavy feeling between your legs, demanding attention by twitching as the his fingers spark fire against your skin.

You wrap your arms around his shoulders and shift to straddle Ronin’s thigh. Ronin’s hands find your waist as you settle there. You shiver as your pussy comes into contact with his bare thigh, hips jerking as your clit presses against his bare skin, and a moan slips past your lips. You meant to give him a second to recover, meant to ignore the burning need between you thighs but Ronin just huffs a laugh against your lips and says ‘somebody’s insatiable. ‘ S my dear darling bunny gonna be living up to their pet name? We gonna be fucking like rabbits now that you’d had a taste ? Got you addicted, huh baby? He cackles loudly at his own joke, head tipping back before he says, ‘C’mon then bunny , hump my leg. You gotta work for your carrot.’ A manic giggle slips past his lips and you think he’s maybe a little delirious. 

You snort a laugh, more at how ridiculous Ronin’s being than the content of what he’s saying but it’s funny all the same. ‘Thought you already gave me your, um… carrot just a second ago.’ You pause, thinking, ‘this bunny’s already eaten.’ You can’t help but giggle loudly through that ridiculous sentence, but even as you talk you can’t help but roll your hips forwards against his thigh anyway, your clittwitching insistently against his thigh as the mere feeling of being pressed against your boyfriend like this.

Ronin snickers, opens his mouth to retort but you beat him to it, grab one of his hands off your waist and say, ‘actually, um- I want-’ You lift yourself off his thigh, your cunt pulling away from his skin sticky and wet, and bring his hand down between your legs. 

Ronin’s gaze flits down to where his hand is being held just underneath your cunt but actually touching it. ‘Suppose I did promise you something along those lines.’ He leans up and kisses you softly, you gasp against his mouth as his hand makes contact with your steadily twitching clit, and your hips stutter forwards into the press of his fingers. 

Ronin slides finger between your folds, rubbing over the flat of your cunt and then against your entrance to gather the slick that's there and bring it up to massage it over your clit. He brushes the slick up over the hood and then rubs  his thumb over your clit a couple times before tracing it around the edge of the hood, right where it folds around your clit. Your hips buck into, and then away from his grip. Where he’s playing with you is sensitive, and the pleasure almost burns as he traces his finger around it. Ronin chuckles breathlessly, ‘Does that feel good , baby?’ You nod frantically, eyes starting to dip shut. Just when you think it’s too much, and the pleasure just starts to lace itself with pain, Ronin lets go and rubs his fingers in tight circles over your clit.

Ronin rubs his other hand across the skin on your hip before dipping it down between your legs too. He grins at you lazily from where he’s leaned back against the wall as he slips his fingers between your folds again and rubs over your entrance. You jerk, surprised at how good it feels to have your pussy touched at the same time as your clit. You push your hips down into the sensation, wanting more but Ronin moves his hand with you, keeps the same teasing pressure until you look at him and see the question on his face. You feel exposed, caught in his downright predatory gaze as you nod, desperately, frantic to let him know that you want this too. 

Ronin presses in with one of his fingers, slowly , and you let out a high pitched moan, feeling every second of it as it burns its way into your pussy. It's so warm , and long, and solid, and everytime you clench around it little electric tingles zap up and down your spine and into your clit. You can’t help but rock your hips into his hand, gaze laser focused on his arms, unable to think about anything other than the fact a part is Ronin is inside you, burning a trail of fire where no one has ever touched before, where you yourself can’t reach.  Ronin, who’s grinning at you like he knows he’s just blown the roof off your mind and that you’re going to need this everyday, forever, until you die .  

You whimper, moans leaking out past your lips around your desperate panting as your hips rock back and forth and Ronin draws his finger out of your slowly. You feel it exactly the same amount as it went in, except the burning line of pleasure it draws in your mounts somehow, and you can’t stop it as your hips start to chase the motion of Ronin’s hand, and you start riding his finger in jerky motions as you struggle to keep your eyes open. 

‘ You're doing so good for me, sweetheart ,’ Ronin praises you and your eyes snap open at the compliment, your hips jerk forwards and you manage to see his gleeful expression clearly for a split second before your vision blurs at the edges, pussy convulsing, spasming around his finger and then you’re cumming; clit contracting in Ronin’s grasp and pussy squeezing around his finger. It rocks through you but all you can focus on is the sensation of him in you, how much of your cunt you can feel convulsing around him. You can hear yourself whining near continuously, gasping out desperate breaths around your moans, hips rolling and twitching, body spasming and pussy gripping Ronin’s finger tightly. You gasp and your hips stutter against as the feeling of his hand on your clit turns sharp and you spasm, falling forwards slightly and catching yourself on Ronin’s shoulders. 

Ronin kisses the side of your head and it would be sweet if he wasn’t drawing a line finger in circles on the head of your clit just to feel you twitch spasm from the over sensitivity. You whine, slur out his name and try bat Ronin’s hand away from your clit with a clumsy hand, leaning heavily against him all the while. You feel his finger slowly pull out of you, his hand rubbing up over your hip, pressing gently on your lower back until you collapse onto him with a squeak. Ronin wraps his arms around you, readjusts your sticky limbs until you’re pressed against each other comfortably as you catch your breath.

‘Thought you were gonna make me squirt, no?’ You mumble out against his neck.

Ronin laughs, sharp and loud, surprised by your line of questioning. ‘Baby , you came so fast I didn’t have a chance to get a second finger in there . You want me to make you squirt, you’re gonna have to last a little longer, darlin’.’ Ronin chuckles and you squirm, turn your flushed face further into his neck and scrape your teeth there in protest. Ronin just hums , pets his hand down the back of your head to leave it resting on your neck, content in just holding you to him. 

‘ So , was it everything you ever dreamed , darlin’?’ The question sounds insincere, sarcastic even , but you know he wouldn’t say it if he didn’t mean it, wouldn’t ask if he didn’t want to know the answer. 

You nod your head from where you’re pressed against Ronin’s neck, start absentmindedly tracing abstract shapes over his chest and say, ‘mhm,’ in a sleepy tone.

‘You passing out on me , darlin’? Wow, guess I fucked you good , huh?’ Ronin’s snickering as he says it, clearly joking but you’re too fucked out to argue, so instead you just nod again and snuggle further into his embrace. Ronin snorts, readjusts his arms to be more comfortable and leans his head against yours. ‘Guess we can take a little nap.’

‘Big nap.’ You mumble. 

You feel his laugh more than you hear it, ‘Not a big nap, darlin’ , what if we never wake up?’ Ronin’s being stupid , but it makes you giggle all the same.

‘Good.’

‘Good ?‘

‘Mhm, same grave.’ 

Ronin’s silent for a second before you hear, ‘Shit, darlin’. Didn’t know you liked me so much.’ It comes out quiet; there’s no sarcasm or sardonic overlay that alters his words into a bastardisation of their meaning, just the truth. 

You rub your face against his collarbone and say, ‘mhm, course I do; you’re Ronin. I love you.’  

CW: cock warming, squirting, PiV sex, Ronin has bottom surgery here, orgasm denial, clit pinching, mildly dubious consent, d/s dynamics, mild humiliation,

Pronouns and genital terms used:

Ronin- he/him, cock, cunt, entrance

Reader- they/them, clit, pussy, cunt, entrance

XXXXXXXXXX

'What'cha workin' on?' Ronin calls out to you from where he's leaning against the doorframe of your bedroom, like he doesn't already know what you're working on- it's the same thing you were working on last night when you called him over thinking you couldn't focus because you missed him so much. Twenty four hours, a couple rounds of sex, and an entire night spent giggling and cuddling later and you still can't focus. You're beginning to think that missing Ronin wasn't the issue and that maybe you're just bad at this- that your first book being written so quickly was a fluke and you're never going to get this edited and sent to your publisher.

You sigh and push your laptop away from you, flopping back onto the bed with a pout, 'same thing as yesterday, same thing as this morning: it's supposed to be the first draft of my next book but I can't focus, I keep getting distracted by stuff.'

'Want me to help?' Ronin meanders slowly into the room, a wolfish look on his face as he appraises you where you're lying on the bed.

You ignore his suggestive look in favour of continuing to complain, 'how could you help? It's not like you can write it for me.'

You're whining but the new draft of your book is due in three days. You just can't seem to pay attention for long enough to finish editing this chapter and you need to finish it today or your whole schedule will be thrown off and then you'll be late.

'Could sit with ya', help keep ya' focused. Tell you off when you get distracted, dicipline you if needed,' Ronin crawls onto the bed, shuffling up beside you and settling in against your back, sliding his arms around your stomach and nuzzling his nose into your neck. If you didn't know any better you'd think he was being sweet.

You snort and push his face back away from you a little, 'I know what's on your mind and it's not keeping me on track. Go jack off if you need to, you horndog.'

'What, you don't want my help?' Ronin's voice is pitched low, playfully offended but it still comes off more seductive than not. It certainly doesn't help his case that he can't seem to stop kissing your neck while he says this.

'Not when your "help" is only going to further distract me. I gotta get this done, I'm trying to focus, Ronin, c'mon, stop.' You swat at him again, pressing your sweaty fingers against his cheek and pushing, trying to get him to leave your neck alone. He knows what it does to you and you'd bet anything that he's purposely trying to weaponise it against you, the bastard.

'I'll be whatever you need, baby. Don't you trust me? Lemme help, yeah? I'll keep you on track, I promise. What've you got to get done?' Ronin stops nuzzling you, letting go of your waist and showing you his hands, shuffling back to sit against the headboard of your bed a couple of feet behind you just to show how much he means it.

'I just need to finish editing this chapter and then I'm done for the day and we can fuck like bunnies all you want,' you tell him distractedly, gaze laser focused on your laptop screen as you close out a very interesting but completely unrelated tab concerning what type of bread you would be- how you got there from a news article on what a steady rate of violent crime does to a city, you have no idea.

'So crass, don't'cha know you're supposed to buy a guy flowers first?'

You roll your eyes and ignore Ronin's comment, clicking on your writing tab and scrolling back up your draft to try find where you left off. You spend a couple minutes editing while Ronin sits behind you, just watching you work. At some point he crawls forwards to lie next to you with his head resting on your thigh. You reach down and pet his hair distractedly, attention focused on a particularly tricky paragraph that was giving you issues when you wrote it and is now sitting there mocking you because you can't figure out how on Earth to fix it.

'This one about me too?' Ronin asks, words coming out muffled from where his face is pressing into your leg.

'My last book was not about you-'

Ronin snorts, 'you just happened to write a crime thriller with a morally grey protagonist that cleaned out uptown's scum through an extravagent murder spree with my exact personality?'

'Yes. Though I wouldn't categorise you as "morally grey",' you say sniffly.

'So it was about me.'

'No, I just said I wouldn't categorise you as morally grey.'

Neither would I, darlin', but the public seems to disagree. D'you hear that some of them are painting me as a kind of guardian angel? I oughtta start only killing morally upstandin' folk just to make a point. You'd think they'd get it by now, with the whole Devil's Butcher moniker and all; I'm not a messenger of God, I am the rot that seeps his unholy creation.

You ignore Ronin's grandstanding in favour of pulling up the search engine and typing in 'disturbing synonyms -ai' in hopes that changing the wording will make the paragraph flow better. You click through several words in an online thesaurus before seeing the word 'discomposing' pop up, so of course you follow the link to find out the definition because you're a writer- learning new words is always good and somehow you wind up fourteen wikipedia pages deep on an article about "morphological gaps".

You hear Ronin snicker from where his face is pressed against your leg and you look down to see him barely holding in a laugh, lips curling into his mouth and eyebrows raised in amusement.

'What?' You snap, annoyed at being interrupted again.

'Was jokin' before but it seems to me like you really do need my help in keepin' you focused. What do…' he pauses as he squints at the screen, ''deverbal nouns' have to do with your newest murder-mystery?'

You balk, wanting to fire back but no words sit on your tongue because 'deverbal nouns' have nothing to do with your book, or at least very little; unfortunately understanding the concept doesn't actually help with you write the damn thing. It doesn't help your case that the only reason you stopped on this page is that it has no more interesting clickable links: it's undeniable, you've gotten distracted again.

'Let me help, darlin. I'm sure I can think of some way to keep you incentivised,' Ronin kneads at you. His face is the picture of innocence but his eyes promise far more trouble than it's worth.

You roll your eyes at him, fully intending to ignore him and go back to working on your book when you feel him shifting on the bed besides you. You make the fatal mistake of assuming he's finally gotten bored and is leaving to find something more entertaining as Ronin sits up but instead he just moves behind you before his arms are wrapping around your waist and pulling you squarely into his lap.

'Ronin!' You shout, alarmed, grappling with your laptop as it slides off your lap, squirming as he settles you down on his legs and gets comfortable, arms wrapping loosely around your waist, hands settled lightly on your stomach.

'Now I can see what you're doing, all the better to keep an eye on you with,' he says, sounding so satisfied with himself that you're sure there's got to be more to it.

You don't know what his game is yet but you're certain that it's not 'keeping you on track' like he says. …But you are comfortable …and it is reassuring to have him wrapped around you like a blanket so instead of fighting with him you sigh, pull your laptop into your lap from where it's lying a few feet away on the bed, and settle back against him comfortably.

It takes all of five minutes for Ronin's intentions to become clear: his hands start wandering around your waist, sliding under your shirt and smoothing over the soft skin on your tummy, rubbing back and forth with one of them slipping lower and lower with each pass until he's got one hand tucked against your ribcage, holding you tightly against him, and the other slipped into your pyjama bottoms and cupping your cunt comfortably.

'Ronin,' you say, warning clear in your voice, but despite yourself- or maybe to spite yourself- your traitorous pussy starts to wet under his hand, like he's pavlov'd you into getting turned on simply because he's touching you.

'Jus' ignore me darlin', focus on your work. 'M just getting comfortable.'

'Comfortable does not include your hand on my pussy,' you tell him.

'Mmm, does to me. Love this part of you, it's so soft, so squishy. My favourite fidget toy.'

'I am not a toy,' you protest.

'News to me. Fun to play with though.'

You roll your eyes but seeing as Ronin's not showing any indication of moving his hand any time soon you decide to ignore it and let him find his amusement in holding you like this. At least this way his hands are fixed in one place instead of actively distracting you by wandering all over your body.

Ronin hums, choosing to steal your focus in a different way, brushing his mouth along your exposed shoulder- you're wearing one of his shirts, having picked it up off the floor and thrown it on without looking when you got out of the shower this morning. It's too big on him, so the collar is loose on you and he is very much taking advantage of that, pressing wet kisses on the exposed skin there and it is distracting. Distracting enough that you can feel your heart beat flutter through your cunt in response.

'Ronin, what are you-' You reach up over your shoulder to put your hand on his face, meaning to turn around and put a stop to his shenanigans but he catches your wrist with the hand that isn't currently on your pussy and puts your fingers back on the keyboard.

'Eyes on the prize, baby. Gotta get your draft done so we can fuck like bunnies when you're finished like you said.'

The audacity. You can't believe he's telling you to work while he's insisting on touching you like this but you roll your eyes and go back to trying to wrangle the paragraph you're editing into submission. …Which, of course, is when the hand in your pants starts petting you, light touches brushing over your clit, smooth and slow in loose, teasing, barely there circles. Your clit twitches to life under the attention like a dog that hasn't seen its owner in months, nevermind the fact you and Ronin had sex just this morning.

'I swear to God, Ronin, stop touching my clit, I'm trying to work,' you halfheartedly grumble at him.

Ronin hums thoughtfully behind you, fingers sliding lower and pressing against your hole, slowly rubbing over where you're still loose from him fucking you earlier. You shift, squirming slightly as you try focus on the words on the page in front of you but it's difficult as your pussy clenches at the feeling of him rubbing your entrance, trying to suck his fingers inside even as you protest, even as your clit twitches repeatedly against Ronin's palm, silently begging for him to return to playing with it even though you just told him not to.

You sigh heavily, going to push your laptop away from you so that you can pay attention to your boyfriend because now you're turned on and you're not going to get any work done like this anyway.

'Ah-ah-ah, work baby. You've got to get this chapter finished or your whole schedule will be thrown off and your publisher is going to be on your ass.' Ronin mocks you, using nearly the exact words you said to him when you told him you couldn't fuck because you had work to do.

You twist round to face him, looking over your shoulder, 'Ronin, you cannot expect me to work like this, I can barely focus with you-'

'I said work.' His hand pauses where it's petting the entrance to your cunt and his tone leaves no room for arguement. Ronin's using the voice normally reserved for bedroom activities where you've asked him to take control and make you feel small and his eyes are drawn up and dark, no lightness or amusement playing in them so you swallow and turn back to your keyboard without another word of protest.

Immediately his hand goes back to petting you, spreading your wetness up through your folds and over your clit before he secures it between two fingers lightly, rubbing them back and forth in a way that makes your hips squirm and your breath hitch at the sensation. You have no idea how you're going to work like this.

Work. Work. Right. Okay. You can do this, you can focus. You give yourself a mini pep talk and ignore the arousal pooling in your gut in favour of highlighting the paragraph you're working on a bright yellow then hitting the 'enter' bar a couple of times below it; if you can't improve this paragraph then you're just going to have to rewrite it completely.

You start rereading the paragraph to get the gist of what it says while trying and failing to ignore Ronin touching you. You can't stop squirming in his arms, hips rolling gently in time with each press of his fingers even as you try to ignore it and stay still. You start and stop typing several times while trying to focus beyond the sensation of him touching your clit. Each time your fingers pause on the keyboard Ronin pauses his movements too, fingers going lax on your clit so that you have a chance to breath, collect yourself, and start typing again.

It's …difficult to type with Ronin touching you: your fingers are trembling on the keyboard, moving sluggishly, tingling and slow to respond; your breath is starting to come fast and heavy, chest heaving as you pant; and you keep mis-typing, having to erase almost as much as you write- both because your fingers aren't cooperating and because your eyes keep trying to slide shut. When Ronin presses his lips to the side of your temple, you break, whining out low and pleading, 'Ronin, I can't work if you keep touching me.'

'Aw, poor baby, my finger's too hot for your blood?'

You nod, looking back at him, putting on your best 'pity me' face, pushing your laptop away from you and preparing to turn around and situate yourself in his lap properly but Ronin steadies you with a hand on your hip.

'I know what you need, don't you worry darlin',' his fingers slide down your cunt, pressing two of them against your hole, rubbing over it before sliding them in in one smooth motion. You gasp at the sudden fullness, hips twitching, humping forwards into his grp as you try to get more of the feeling.

Ronin presses his lips to your temple again while dragging his fingers lazily in and out of your pussy as he murmurs, 'your cunt's been talkin' to me, listen to it, 's beggin' f'me to fill it. You want that baby? You want my cock?' His breath is hot on your face and you turn into it, making his lips slide wetly over your forehead.

'Yes, let's- c'mon, we can-' you try turn your body towards him again and you feel as much as hear him laugh quietly, breath puffing out against your face as he stops you, again.

'Patience, baby. Gotta get myself ready first, gimme a sec.' He pulls his fingers out of your pussy and you have to stop yourself from whining in disappointment as you clench down on nothing.

Ronin hums thoughtfully, patting the side of your ass gently in encouragement for you to get up. You slip off his lap and wriggle forwards, sliding your pyjama bottoms down your legs and off. You can feel Ronin shift behind you as he shimmies his jeans down over his hips. You roll over onto your knees to face him and the sight that greets you is so hot that something in your tummy pulls tight in anticipation as your clit twiches, hard and heavy with need and demanding attention.

Ronin's leaning back against the headboard, one hand on his cock pulling languidly as the other cups his balls, rolling them in his hand and squeezing as he watches you with heavily lidded eyes.

'You want a hand there handsome?' You quip teasingly, a warm feeling bubbling in your chest that he's finally comfortable enough to let you watch as he plays with the pump that allows him to inflate his cock so he can fuck you.

Ronin winks, hand squeezing his balls as his cock reaches full hardness, 'nah, just about got it covered. Turn around and come here,' he pats his lap, grinning at you lazily.

'Reverse cow-…person?' You were going for coy but end up sounding more confused as the name of the sex position sounds rather odd with the gender removed. You giggle at the ridiculousness of it all as Ronin rolls his eyes before beckoning you forwards with a finger and a lazy grin.

You crawl towards him, sliding up between his legs and settling there before running your hands over his shoulders. Ronin puts his hands on your hips and encourages you to turn with a, 'course, baby.' His hands slide on your hips as you turn around before he grabs the meat of your ass with an appreciative hiss.

You roll your hips back towards him and hear him bite out, 'what you do to me darlin'. Should be illegal,' before he's smacking your ass with an open palm. The sharp sting radiates out from where his hand landed, leaving a numb-ish tingling sensation behind that sends a shiver down your spine.

Ronin pulls your hips back towards him with one hand, guiding you down to sit on him. You breath out a moan as you feel his cock sliding between your pussy lips, pressing up against your hole, stretching your entrace as his cock slides in while you sink down on him. Ronin lets out a groan as he enters you and you can feel him pressing kisses over the shirt covering your back.

You moan low in your throat as you feel his cock fill you, stretching your pussy until you're full, pressing up against all the parts of your that feel good, his cockhead nestling up against your cervix. Your ass bumps his hips and you go to roll them, wanting to feel him grind deep in you but Ronin's hands settle on your hips firmly and hold you there. He presses himself up along your back, pulling you back to lean against him.

'Mmmm, 'Nin, you feel so good,' you breath out.

Ronin lets out a chuckle, breath ghosting over your ear as he gets comfortable. 'Good,' he says, 'maybe now you can focus, with your needy pussy all full and satisfied.

''Nin, what are you talking about?' You ask with confused amusement in your voice. You try to lift off him again, wanting to roll your hips and finally feel the friction of his cock pulling out of you, the fullness of him grinding up into you when you sink back home, but Ronin keeps his hands tightly on your hips, using his strength to hold you in place, completely unmoving, so all you manage is a useless full body jerk and a dissatisfied wiggle in place.

'Your work, baby, you've got so much writing to do. C'mon, you don't wanna to lose focus now, not when you're almost done.'

'What? Ronin, no. We're having sex, c'mon, fuck me.' You try lift off him again to no avail.

'What?' He mocks you, voice full of fake pity as he says, 'baby, baby, where did you get that idea? Did you fuckin' forget already? I'm helping you work, gotta keep you focused. Didn't you say you wanted t' stay on track?'

'Ronin, don't be silly, come on, fuck me,' your voice comes out whiny as you try to convince him but he's resolute, only tutting as you try to roll your hips against him, his grip firm on your waist. His hands leave your hips momentarily and for a split second you think you've won, that you've convinced him to stop this silly game and that he's finally going to fuck you as he shifts behind you.

Instead of that, Ronin leans over to reach something but you don't see what, you're too busy with your eyes fluttering shut because the movement jostles you in his lap. His cock slides within you, a sweet burning friction that presses against a gooey part of your pussy that makes you gasp and squirm where you're pinned open on him- but that's all the friction you get as he stops shifting abruptly when he sets your laptop back in your lap.

''Nin?' You question, feeling his hands settle on your waist. He pull you back slightly so that your back is pressed against his front, then his arms are sliding around your waist, taking your hands in his own and putting them back on the keyboard of your laptop and leaving them there as his arms curl around your waist while he settles in, head resting in the crook of your neck.

'Work, baby. Gotta focus.' Ronin's tone doesn't leave any room for discussion. You gulp, pussy squeezing down on his cock as your clit twitches at the gravelly sound of his voice. You know he doesn't miss the clench of your pussy on his cock as he laughs, breathless and a little mean at the feeling but still he nudges your head with his own, directing you to turn your attention back to your laptop.

You break eye contact with him, swivelling your head back towards your laptop and trying to refocus your attention back on your work but it's exceedingly difficult with how your pussy is rhythmically clenching, sucking at his cock and trying to pull him further within you although your ass is pressed flat to his hips to compensate for the fact his cock unmoving within you.

You blink purposefully, shaking your head to try and clear it, refocusing your vision on the keys in front of you. The paragraph you're editing- or rewriting is more like- glares at you from the page, taunting you with its imperfections but it's nothing compared to the absolute tease that is feeling Ronin's cock twitch inside you and not being able to do anything about it.

It takes a moment- or several- for you to forget the feeling of him sitting hot and heavy inside of you, putting pressure on all the parts of your cunt that feel good but eventually you do manage to focus. You conquer the paragraph, taking several lines from the one you'd already written, rearranging and then slotting them into the new one. As soon as you're done with it, almost like a prize for completely it, Ronin rolls his hips, his cock sliding in and out of your pussy only slightly, a subtle grind that has your breath stuttering, catching on a moan in your throat as you whimper.

You try roll your hips down into the motion, wanting to feel more but instantaneously Ronin's arms tighten around your waist, stopping you with a, 'shows not over darlin', c'mon, focus, baby,' as he taps the edge of the laptop with one hand. His voice is teasing, lilting and you don't understand how he can sound so collected with your ass pressed against his hips and your pussy stuffed full of his cock.

You growl in response, caught somewhere between annoyed and desperate for his touch, clicking through the next paragraph with aggression as you catch typos and replace verbs. To add insult to injury, Ronin's hand snakes down and presses over your clit, rubbing slow, teasing circles against the hood of it, fingers only ever catching breifly over the exposed nub of nerves beneath even though you're so wet his hand has to be sticky with it.

Your fingers pause on the keyboard, eyes fluttering shut at the sensation as your pussy clenches hotly on his cock, rippling as the sensation burns through you. Ronin's fingers stop rubbing your clit, catching it between his thumb and forefinger as he pinches. You squeal, the sound bursting free of your throat as you writhe while a odd burst of combined pain and pleasure causes your eyes to dart open, looking around desperately for the cause even thought you already know.

'Ro-ronin,' you gasp wetly as his hand returns to its leisurely petting.

''M jus' keeping you on track, baby. Write.' His voice is coloured with amusement as his fingers circle your clit gently.

You shudder, pussy clenching and hips making aborted attempts to roll down even though there's nowhere to roll, you're fully seated on him, his cock is pressing up against your cervix and stretching you out fully so bearing down doesn't do anything other than grind him within you. Ronin chuckles lightly, lips pressed to your shoulder before his hands tighten his grip on you and stop you from moving entirely. A whine bursts free from your throat that sounds suspiciously close to a sob as the limited friction you were getting is cut off abruptly.

You place your tingling fingers back on the keyboard, trying to rush through the last few paragraphs as fast as you can, editing dialogue tags and the language the main character uses to try make it sound more natural. You hear Ronin stifle a snicker from behind you and you stop, fingers pausing as you snap, 'what?' your irriation at his teasing finally bubbling over into something tangible.

Ronin pinches your clit again, fingers squeezing harder and holding as you jerk uselessly in his grasp, hands coming up to scrabble weakly at his wrist before he finally lets go and an even more confusing burst of painful pleasure rushes into your clit as soon as he stops the constriction. Your hips jerk harshly, cunt clenching down on his cock as you tremble, stomach tightening then relaxing as the pleasure slowly fizzles out without him touching your clit.

You're left panting, chest heaving and thoughts dazed and disconnected as Ronin pets his hands lightly over your hips and makes soft cooing noises that are full of pity. 'Focus, baby. 'S not that hard,' he says lightly, like he didn't just pinch your clit so hard your vision briefly blurred at the edges and simultaneously denied you the orgasm that was so close.

'That's unfair, you laughed. What was so fucking funny?' You whine out, vowels stretched and distressed.

'Nah, 's nothin'. I'll tell you after, deal?' Ronin denies your answer the same way he denied your orgasm and it only riles your emotions up further.

'I hate you,' you pout, in a mood that he's not giving you an answer.

'That's not what your pussy's sayin'~' Ronin singsongs liltingly into your ear.

You shoot him a dirty look over your shoulder, unsure if he can even see it with how close his face is pressed to your neck, before putting your fingers back to the keyboard and muttering with venom in your voice, 'I'm gonna fucking kill you when I'm done, you asshole.'

Ronin shudders behind you, his hips suddenly bumping up, thrusting underneath you, once, twice, three times as he grunts before he manages to still them with a groan. His cock presses up against your cervix, grinding as his hips squirm weakly. You gasp, chest heaving as you try catch your breath, back arching as your hands scrabble against Ronin's legs and the blanket, attempting to ground yourself at the sudden stimulation.

Ronin pants hotly against your neck, showing the first signs that any of this is affecting him as much as it's affecting you. 'You promise, darlin'? Don't dangle Hell in front of a man's face and then snatch it away without any care now.'

''Nin, please, can we just-'

'You're the one who wanted to play this game, darlin'. There's only one way for you to get out of it.'

'…What if I described how I would kill you?' Your voice comes out meek, a little wobbly as you're unsure how the suggestion will go over.

Ronin hisses, breath firing out from between his teeth as he groans, forehead braced on your back as you feel his cock twitch hard within you. Then, without warning he unhinges his jaw and his teeth clamp down on your shoulder, hard. You try to shriek but your voice is caught in your throat, so instead you mouth soundlessly as pain radiates out from your shoulder and your pussy clenches in a confusing tremble.

He catches your clit between his thumb and forefinger yet again and squeezes. You squeal, voice finally leaping free as you wriggle in place to try and run from the sensation but Ronin's got you pinned in place with his arm, his teeth, and his fingers. He doesn't let up either pressure, not until you've got hot tears welling up and streaking down your face as you frantically spit out, 'okay! Okay! I'll work! I'll work!' voice garbled and whiny while your hands smack his legs in a desperate attempt to tap out.

You shudder and moan as the blood rushes back into your clit and your shoulder goes numb with tingly pain as his teeth release it. Your clit pulses so hard you're worried you're going to cum, desperately trying not to despite how much you want because you don't think you'd like whatever punishment Ronin will think up for you if you did, but it just clenches tight, contracting in time with the throbbing of your cunt as you try to slow your breathing and relax.

It works, barely. Your pussy pulses, leaking out slick around Ronin's cock like that will get him to move, but that's all the happens before the pleasure receeds as you whimper and whine.

You're not any less worked up though, whole body tingling, breath coming harsh and fast, clit throbbing insistently as Ronin lowers his hand to pet over it lightly, which is not ideal for finishing your writing.

Each time you get close to tipping over the edge, which is frequently, Ronin stops touching you, tutting and pressing silent kisses to the side of your face, following the wet traces of where your tears have spilt over the edge of your lashline and dribbled down your face with his tongue. You sob in frustration, hips trying to hump but not able to move in his tight grip, clit twitching uselessly without anything to grind against. The only saving grace is that the fullness of Ronin's cock splitting you open gives your pussy something to clench on.

You wipe your face and put your trembling hands back on the keyboard, ignoring how achingly full your cunt is, how insistently wanting your clit is as it twitches every other second even though it's not being touched. You fire through the paragraph as fast as humanly possible while still trying to do a decent job- not because you care about it anymore, no, at this point you hate it, at this point it's your enemy, but because you have a niggling worry at the back of your mind that Ronin might make you redo it if you half ass it and you don't think you can take much more of this.

'Finished!' You shout, practically chucking the laptop off of you and towards the end of the bed as soon as you've saved the document.

Ronin huffs out a laugh against your ear, warm breath puffing over your face as he teasingly drawls, 'not gonna let me check your work, huh?'

You pause, drawing in a trembling breath as you worry that Ronin actually might make you collect your laptop and stay still until he checks your work but before the worry can run too far he laughs again, nuzzling your cheek.

'Don't look so worried, doll. 'S if I could wait another fuckin' second.' Ronin leans back on the bed slowly, arms wrapping tight around your middle to keep you close to him without tipping off to the side as he goes. You have a second to marvel at the raw display of strength he's showing as he slowly lies down before you're laid entirely flat on top of him. You feel unsettled, unsecure in the position but his arms stay so tightly wrapped around you that you couldn't move an inch even if you wanted to, much less slip off accidentally.

Your hips tilt up due to the angle, that fat of your ass putting distance between your hips, drawing Ronin's cock out of you and pulling a whimper from your chest at the loss as your weight rests against his chest. Your disappointment is short lived when he tucks his head forwards to reach your neck, kissing your shoulder softly as his hips start to piston beneath you.

Ronin grunts out his breath, hips laying flat against the bed so that his cock pulls out with only the head left in and then tilting up harshly to push it back in in long, hard thrusts that punch the breath from your chest. Your mind spins, head empty except for how good it feels to be fucked after being denied for so long as the angle of his cock drives against something gooey and hot at the front of your cunt. There's a mild worry niggling at the back of your mind that it kind of feels like you have to pee but you ignore the feeling in favour of chasing the orgasm that's been denied to you too many times to count.

You shove a hand down to your clit, fingers fumbling and skidding wetly over it before you manage to steady your hand enough to draw tight circles over it using the pads of your fingers. Your pussy feels like it's melting around Ronin's cock and each time he thrusts into you little yelps leave the back of your throat unbidden. Your whole body feels loose and tingly, limbs jerking and trembling where they're trailing off of him as Ronin fucks up into you.

Your head lolls to the side on his shoulder, eyes squeezing shut as your vision fuzzes at the edges. Your clit is pulsing every other second and you can feel the beat of Ronin's heart through his cock. Your pussy squeezes in response and his cock twitches every time you clench down on him. Your breathing comes fast and hard as you play with your clit but your fingers are weak with want, you have trouble keeping them on course so you whine breathlessly, desperately, ''Nin, Nin, help me, please I need-'

'Know what'cha need baby. Known all along, c'mere, let me-' Ronin pants out, voice rough and deep. One arm tightens around your waist so hard that his hand is definitely going to leave bruises as the other slips down, down, down, batting your own semi-useless fingers out of the way as he slides his fingers over your wet pussy. He locates your clit quickly and catches it between two fingers, rubbing them together gently.

The tips of his fingers burn where they've caught your clit but it doesn't feel like enough, you moan weakly, breath escaping your mouth in hoarse pants as you try press your hips up into the sensation, wanting it harder or more or something. Ronin proves his words right as his fingers stop their rubbing and clamp down hard on your clit for the fourth time this evening and squeeze.

You squeal, the pain in your clit is sharp and bright but it's everything you need to tip you over the edge into your orgasm. The sound in your throat devolves into a hoarse moan that's more akin to a scream as your clit pulses tightly under his hand, as your cunt clentches down and grips his cock so tightly that Ronin's hips are forced to stop moving, unable to thrust in or out as he swears under his breath, a litany of 'fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuucckkkk,' that you don't hear over the sound of blood rushing loudly in your ears.

You feel Ronin's cock jerk deep within you, pulsing in a heavy rhythm and some distant part of your mind connects the sensation to the fact that Ronin is cumming in you. Pleasure radiates through your body, clenching in your stomach and shooting electricity up your spine, cascading through your cunt and leaving your limbs feeling tingly and weak as your clit convulses in a heavy pattern, throbbing with the rhythm of your release.

At the same time, you feel something hot and wet gush out of your cunt in a short bursts, pushing Ronin's cock out your pussy with the force of it. On it's heels a far slower, far thicker feeling that's entirely foreign to you seeps out of what can only be your urethra in a hot, slow throb that leaves you sobbing, scrabbling at Ronin's arms for something to ground yourself amidst the pleasure.

The feeling drops, dipping slowly into a fading smattering of clenches that get further and further apart as your limbs stop shaking and your breath comes laden heavy and fast in attempts to catch itself. The only thought rattling around your mind as it clears is: …did I just ejaculate? What the fuck was that? As you fixate on the feeling of something hot leaking out of you during the end of your orgasm.

Ronin's voice cuts smoothly through your reeling thoughts as he attempts to dryly say, 'feel good, darlin'?' but it comes out rather breathless, syllables extended and slurred slightly with how relaxed he is. His arms are limp, loosely curled around you rather than holding you to him now so you roll off, flopping to the side rather uselessly as all your limbs feel like jelly.

You nod in response to his question, rolling over in place and then wiggling into his outstretched arms, ignoring how sticky, hot, sweaty you both are in favour of being close to him. After lying there for a moment, positively floating from the endorphines, Ronin's laughter from earlier floats to your mind and you think to ask, 'what was so funny, earlier?'

Ronin snorts, tracing his fingers up the back of your arm as he says, 'nothin' much, Jus' I think our activities may have bled into your writing a little. You're gonna have to rewrite that whole crime scene investigation again, dialogue's a little… horny for a murder scene. Not that I'm complaining but your audience might not find killing and death as sexy as you wrote it.' Ronin giggles, high pitched and incredibly amused at your predicament

'…Fuckkkkk, my publisher is gonna kill me. Y'know what? Fuck it. I'll do it later, I can be a day late. I'm fucking wiped. You wanna get takeout for dinner?'

XXXXXXXXXX

CW: cock warming, squirting, PiV sex, Ronin has bottom surgery here, orgasm denial, clit pinching, mildly dubious consent, d/s dynamics, mild humiliation,

Pronouns and genital terms used:

Ronin- he/him, cock, cunt, entrance

Reader- he/him, cock, pussy, cunt, entrance

XXXXXXXXXX

'What'cha workin' on?' Ronin calls out to you from where he's leaning against the doorframe of your bedroom, like he doesn't already know what you're working on- it's the same thing you were working on last night when you called him over thinking you couldn't focus because you missed him so much. Twenty four hours, a couple rounds of sex, and an entire night spent giggling and cuddling later and you still can't focus. You're beginning to think that missing Ronin wasn't the issue and that maybe you're just bad at this- that your first book being written so quickly was a fluke and you're never going to get this edited and sent to your publisher.

You sigh and push your laptop away from you, flopping back onto the bed with a pout, 'same thing as yesterday, same thing as this morning: it's supposed to be the first draft of my next book but I can't focus, I keep getting distracted by stuff.'

'Want me to help?' Ronin meanders slowly into the room, a wolfish look on his face as he appraises you where you're lying on the bed.

You ignore his suggestive look in favour of continuing to complain, 'how could you help? It's not like you can write it for me.'

You're whining but the new draft of your book is due in three days. You just can't seem to pay attention for long enough to finish editing this chapter and you need to finish it today or your whole schedule will be thrown off and then you'll be late.

'Could sit with ya', help keep ya' focused. Tell you off when you get distracted, dicipline you if needed,' Ronin crawls onto the bed, shuffling up beside you and settling in against your back, sliding his arms around your stomach and nuzzling his nose into your neck. If you didn't know any better you'd think he was being sweet.

You snort and push his face back away from you a little, 'I know what's on your mind and it's not keeping me on track. Go jack off if you need to, you horndog.'

'What, you don't want my help?' Ronin's voice is pitched low, playfully offended but it still comes off more seductive than not. It certainly doesn't help his case that he can't seem to stop kissing your neck while he says this.

'Not when your "help" is only going to further distract me. I gotta get this done, I'm trying to focus, Ronin, c'mon, stop.' You swat at him again, pressing your sweaty fingers against his cheek and pushing, trying to get him to leave your neck alone. He knows what it does to you and you'd bet anything that he's purposely trying to weaponise it against you, the bastard.

'I'll be whatever you need, baby. Don't you trust me? Lemme help, yeah? I'll keep you on track, I promise. What've you got to get done?' Ronin stops nuzzling you, letting go of your waist and showing you his hands, shuffling back to sit against the headboard of your bed a couple of feet behind you just to show how much he means it.

'I just need to finish editing this chapter and then I'm done for the day and we can fuck like bunnies all you want,' you tell him distractedly, gaze laser focused on your laptop screen as you close out a very interesting but completely unrelated tab concerning what type of bread you would be- how you got there from a news article on what a steady rate of violent crime does to a city, you have no idea.

'So crass, don't'cha know you're supposed to buy a guy flowers first?'

You roll your eyes and ignore Ronin's comment, clicking on your writing tab and scrolling back up your draft to try find where you left off. You spend a couple minutes editing while Ronin sits behind you, just watching you work. At some point he crawls forwards to lie next to you with his head resting on your thigh. You reach down and pet his hair distractedly, attention focused on a particularly tricky paragraph that was giving you issues when you wrote it and is now sitting there mocking you because you can't figure out how on Earth to fix it.

'This one about me too?' Ronin asks, words coming out muffled from where his face is pressing into your leg.

'My last book was not about you-'

Ronin snorts, 'you just happened to write a crime thriller with a morally grey protagonist that cleaned out uptown's scum through an extravagent murder spree with my exact personality?'

'Yes. Though I wouldn't categorise you as "morally grey",' you say sniffly.

'So it was about me.'

'No, I just said I wouldn't categorise you as morally grey.'

Neither would I, darlin', but the public seems to disagree. D'you hear that some of them are painting me as a kind of guardian angel? I oughtta start only killing morally upstandin' folk just to make a point. You'd think they'd get it by now, with the whole Devil's Butcher moniker and all; I'm not a messenger of God, I am the rot that seeps his unholy creation.

You ignore Ronin's grandstanding in favour of pulling up the search engine and typing in 'disturbing synonyms -ai' in hopes that changing the wording will make the paragraph flow better. You click through several words in an online thesaurus before seeing the word 'discomposing' pop up, so of course you follow the link to find out the definition because you're a writer- learning new words is always good and somehow you wind up fourteen wikipedia pages deep on an article about "morphological gaps".

You hear Ronin snicker from where his face is pressed against your leg and you look down to see him barely holding in a laugh, lips curling into his mouth and eyebrows raised in amusement.

'What?' You snap, annoyed at being interrupted again.

'Was jokin' before but it seems to me like you really do need my help in keepin' you focused. What do…' he pauses as he squints at the screen, ''deverbal nouns' have to do with your newest murder-mystery?'

You balk, wanting to fire back but no words sit on your tongue because 'deverbal nouns' have nothing to do with your book, or at least very little; unfortunately understanding the concept doesn't actually help with you write the damn thing. It doesn't help your case that the only reason you stopped on this page is that it has no more interesting clickable links: it's undeniable, you've gotten distracted again.

'Let me help, darlin. I'm sure I can think of some way to keep you incentivised,' Ronin kneads at you. His face is the picture of innocence but his eyes promise far more trouble than it's worth.

You roll your eyes at him, fully intending to ignore him and go back to working on your book when you feel him shifting on the bed besides you. You make the fatal mistake of assuming he's finally gotten bored and is leaving to find something more entertaining as Ronin sits up but instead he just moves behind you before his arms are wrapping around your waist and pulling you squarely into his lap.

'Ronin!' You shout, alarmed, grappling with your laptop as it slides off your lap, squirming as he settles you down on his legs and gets comfortable, arms wrapping loosely around your waist, hands settled lightly on your stomach.

'Now I can see what you're doing, all the better to keep an eye on you with,' he says, sounding so satisfied with himself that you're sure there's got to be more to it.

You don't know what his game is yet but you're certain that it's not 'keeping you on track' like he says. …But you are comfortable …and it is reassuring to have him wrapped around you like a blanket so instead of fighting with him you sigh, pull your laptop into your lap from where it's lying a few feet away on the bed, and settle back against him comfortably.

It takes all of five minutes for Ronin's intentions to become clear: his hands start wandering around your waist, sliding under your shirt and smoothing over the soft skin on your tummy, rubbing back and forth with one of them slipping lower and lower with each pass until he's got one hand tucked against your ribcage, holding you tightly against him, and the other slipped into your pyjama bottoms and cupping your cunt comfortably.

'Ronin,' you say, warning clear in your voice, but despite yourself- or maybe to spite yourself- your traitorous pussy starts to wet under his hand, like he's pavlov'd you into getting turned on simply because he's touching you.

'Jus' ignore me darlin', focus on your work. 'M just getting comfortable.'

'Comfortable does not include your hand on my pussy,' you tell him.

'Mmm, does to me. Love this part of you, it's so soft, so squishy. My favourite fidget toy.'

'I am not a toy,' you protest.

'News to me. Fun to play with though.'

You roll your eyes but seeing as Ronin's not showing any indication of moving his hand any time soon you decide to ignore it and let him find his amusement in holding you like this. At least this way his hands are fixed in one place instead of actively distracting you by wandering all over your body.

Ronin hums, choosing to steal your focus in a different way, brushing his mouth along your exposed shoulder- you're wearing one of his shirts, having picked it up off the floor and thrown it on without looking when you got out of the shower this morning. It's too big on him, so the collar is loose on you and he is very much taking advantage of that, pressing wet kisses on the exposed skin there and it is distracting. Distracting enough that you can feel your heart beat flutter through your cunt in response.

'Ronin, what are you-' You reach up over your shoulder to put your hand on his face, meaning to turn around and put a stop to his shenanigans but he catches your wrist with the hand that isn't currently on your pussy and puts your fingers back on the keyboard.

'Eyes on the prize, baby. Gotta get your draft done so we can fuck like bunnies when you're finished like you said.'

The audacity. You can't believe he's telling you to work while he's insisting on touching you like this but you roll your eyes and go back to trying to wrangle the paragraph you're editing into submission. …Which, of course, is when the hand in your pants starts petting you, light touches massaging the shaft of your cock, up and down in smooth, slow, repetitive motions, teasing you to get you hard. Your cock twitches to life under the attention like a dog that hasn't seen its owner in months, nevermind the fact you and Ronin had sex just this morning.

'I swear to God, Ronin, stop touching my cock, I'm trying to work,' you halfheartedly grumble at him.

Ronin hums thoughtfully behind you, fingers sliding lower and pressing against your hole, slowly rubbing over where you're still loose from him fucking you earlier. You shift, squirming slightly as you try focus on the words on the page in front of you but it's difficult as your pussy clenches at the feeling of him rubbing your entrance, trying to suck his fingers inside even as you protest, even as your cock twitches repeatedly against Ronin's palm where it's brushing against him, silently begging for him to return to playing with it properly even though you just told him not to.

You sigh heavily, going to push your laptop away from you so that you can pay attention to your boyfriend because now you're turned on and you're not going to get any work done like this anyway.

'Ah-ah-ah, work baby. You've got to get this chapter finished or your whole schedule will be thrown off and your publisher is going to be on your ass.' Ronin mocks you, using nearly the exact words you said to him when you told him you couldn't fuck because you had work to do.

You twist round to face him, looking over your shoulder, 'Ronin, you cannot expect me to work like this, I can barely focus with you-'

'I said work.' His hand pauses where it's petting the entrance to your cunt and his tone leaves no room for arguement. Ronin's using the voice normally reserved for bedroom activities where you've asked him to take control and make you feel small and his eyes are drawn up and dark, no lightness or amusement playing in them so you swallow and turn back to your keyboard without another word of protest.

Immediately his hand goes back to petting you, spreading your wetness up through your folds and over your cock before he secures it in between his fingers, rubbing them back and forth in a firm tugging motion that makes your cock fill and your hips squirm while your breath hitches at the sensation. You have no idea how you're going to work like this.

Work. Work. Right. Okay. You can do this, you can focus. You give yourself a mini pep talk and ignore the arousal pooling in your gut in favour of highlighting the paragraph you're working on a bright yellow then hitting the 'enter' bar a couple of times below it; if you can't improve this paragraph then you're just going to have to rewrite it completely.

You start rereading the paragraph to get the gist of what it says while trying and failing to ignore Ronin touching you. You can't stop squirming in his arms, hips rolling gently in time with each pull of his fingers even as you try to ignore it and stay still. You start and stop typing several times while trying to focus beyond the sensation of him touching your cock. Each time your fingers pause on the keyboard Ronin pauses his movements too, hand going lax on your cock so that you have a chance to breath, collect yourself, and start typing again.

It's …difficult to type with Ronin touching you: your fingers are trembling on the keyboard, moving sluggishly, tingling and slow to respond; your breath is starting to come fast and heavy, chest heaving as you pant; and you keep mis-typing, having to erase almost as much as you write- both because your fingers aren't cooperating and because your eyes keep trying to slide shut. When Ronin presses his lips to the side of your temple, you break, whining out low and pleading, 'Ronin, I can't work if you keep touching me.'

'Aw, poor baby, my finger's too hot for your blood?'

You nod, looking back at him, putting on your best 'pity me' face, pushing your laptop away from you and preparing to turn around and situate yourself in his lap properly but Ronin steadies you with a hand on your hip.

'I know what you need, don't you worry darlin',' his fingers slide down your cunt, pressing two of them against your hole, rubbing over it before sliding them in in one smooth motion. You gasp at the sudden fullness, hips twitching, humping forwards into his grp as you try to get more of the feeling.

Ronin presses his lips to your temple again while dragging his fingers lazily in and out of your pussy as he murmurs, 'your cunt's been talkin' to me, listen to him, he's beggin' f'me to fill him. You want that baby? You want my cock?' His breath is hot on your face and you turn into it, making his lips slide wetly over your forehead.

'Yes, let's- c'mon, we can-' you try turn your body towards him again and you feel as much as hear him laugh quietly, breath puffing out against your face as he stops you, again.

'Patience, baby. Gotta get myself ready first, gimme a sec.' He pulls his fingers out of your pussy and you have to stop yourself from whining in disappointment as you clench down on nothing.

Ronin hums thoughtfully, patting the side of your ass gently in encouragement for you to get up. You slip off his lap and wriggle forwards, sliding your pyjama bottoms down your legs and off. You can feel Ronin shift behind you as he shimmies his jeans down over his hips. You roll over onto your knees to face him and the sight that greets you is so hot that something in your tummy pulls tight in anticipation as your cock twiches, hard and heavy with need and demanding attention.

Ronin's leaning back against the headboard, one hand on his cock pulling languidly as the other cups his balls, rolling them in his hand and squeezing as he watches you with heavily lidded eyes.

'You want a hand there handsome?' You quip teasingly, a warm feeling bubbling in your chest that he's finally comfortable enough to let you watch as he plays with the pump that allows him to inflate his cock so he can fuck you.

Ronin winks, hand squeezing his balls as his cock reaches full hardness, 'nah, just about got it covered. Turn around and come here,' he pats his lap, grinning at you lazily.

'Reverse cow-boy, I like it.' You say approvingly. Ronin gives you an amused look that you can't quite pin the reason for before he's beckoning you forwards with a finger and a lazy grin.

You crawl towards him, sliding up between his legs and settling there before running your hands over his shoulders. Ronin puts his hands on your hips and encourages you to turn with a, 'course, baby.' His hands slide on your hips as you turn around before he grabs the meat of your ass with an appreciative hiss.

You roll your hips back towards him and hear him bite out, 'what you do to me darlin'. Should be illegal,' before he's smacking your ass with an open palm. The sharp sting radiates out from where his hand landed, leaving a numb-ish tingling sensation behind that sends a shiver down your spine.

Ronin pulls your hips back towards him with one hand, guiding you down to sit on him. You breath out a moan as you feel his cock sliding between your pussy lips, pressing up against your hole, stretching your entrace as his cock slides in while you sink down on him. Ronin lets out a groan as he enters you and you can feel him pressing kisses over the shirt covering your back.

You moan low in your throat as you feel his cock fill you, stretching your pussy until you're full, pressing up against all the parts of your that feel good, his cockhead nestling up against your cervix. Your ass bumps his hips and you go to roll them, wanting to feel him grind deep in you but Ronin's hands settle on your hips firmly and hold you there. He presses himself up along your back, pulling you back to lean against him.

'Mmmm, 'Nin, you feel so good,' you breath out.

Ronin lets out a chuckle, breath ghosting over your ear as he gets comfortable. 'Good,' he says, 'maybe now you can focus, with your needy pussy all full and satisfied.

''Nin, what are you talking about?' You ask with confused amusement in your voice. You try to lift off him again, wanting to roll your hips and finally feel the friction of his cock pulling out of you, the fullness of him grinding up into you when you sink back home, but Ronin keeps his hands tightly on your hips, using his strength to hold you in place, completely unmoving, so all you manage is a useless full body jerk and a dissatisfied wiggle in place.

'Your work, baby, you've got so much writing to do. C'mon, you don't wanna to lose focus now, not when you're almost done.'

'What? Ronin, no. We're having sex, c'mon, fuck me.' You try lift off him again to no avail.

'What?' He mocks you, voice full of fake pity as he says, 'baby, baby, where did you get that idea? Did you fuckin' forget already? I'm helping you work, gotta keep you focused. Didn't you say you wanted t' stay on track?'

'Ronin, don't be silly, come on, fuck me,' your voice comes out whiny as you try to convince him but he's resolute, only tutting as you try to roll your hips against him, his grip firm on your waist. His hands leave your hips momentarily and for a split second you think you've won, that you've convinced him to stop this silly game and that he's finally going to fuck you as he shifts behind you.

Instead of that, Ronin leans over to reach something but you don't see what, you're too busy with your eyes fluttering shut because the movement jostles you in his lap. His cock slides within you, a sweet burning friction that presses against a gooey part of your pussy that makes you gasp and squirm where you're pinned open on him- but that's all the friction you get as he stops shifting abruptly when he sets your laptop back in your lap.

''Nin?' You question, feeling his hands settle on your waist. He pull you back slightly so that your back is pressed against his front, then his arms are sliding around your waist, taking your hands in his own and putting them back on the keyboard of your laptop and leaving them there as his arms curl around your waist while he settles in, head resting in the crook of your neck.

'Work, baby. Gotta focus.' Ronin's tone doesn't leave any room for discussion. You gulp, pussy squeezing down on his cock as your own cock twitches at the gravelly sound of his voice. You know he doesn't miss the clench of your pussy on his cock as he laughs, breathless and a little mean at the feeling but still he nudges your head with his own, directing you to turn your attention back to your laptop.

You break eye contact with him, swivelling your head back towards your laptop and trying to refocus your attention back on your work but it's exceedingly difficult with how your pussy is rhythmically clenching, sucking at his cock and trying to pull him further within you although your ass is pressed flat to his hips to compensate for the fact his cock unmoving within you.

You blink purposefully, shaking your head to try and clear it, refocusing your vision on the keys in front of you. The paragraph you're editing- or rewriting is more like- glares at you from the page, taunting you with its imperfections but it's nothing compared to the absolute tease that is feeling Ronin's cock twitch inside you and not being able to do anything about it.

It takes a moment- or several- for you to forget the feeling of him sitting hot and heavy inside of you, putting pressure on all the parts of your cunt that feel good but eventually you do manage to focus. You conquer the paragraph, taking several lines from the one you'd already written, rearranging and then slotting them into the new one. As soon as you're done with it, almost like a prize for completely it, Ronin rolls his hips, his cock sliding in and out of your pussy only slightly, a subtle grind that has your breath stuttering, catching on a moan in your throat as you whimper.

You try roll your hips down into the motion, wanting to feel more but instantaneously Ronin's arms tighten around your waist, stopping you with a, 'shows not over darlin', c'mon, focus, baby,' as he taps the edge of the laptop with one hand. His voice is teasing, lilting and you don't understand how he can sound so collected with your ass pressed against his hips and your pussy stuffed full of his cock.

You growl in response, caught somewhere between annoyed and desperate for his touch, clicking through the next paragraph with aggression as you catch typos and replace verbs. To add insult to injury, Ronin's hand snakes down and presses over your cock, tugging in slow, teasing motions against the shaft of it, fingers only ever catching breifly over the head of it even though you're so wet his hand has to be sticky with it.

Your fingers pause on the keyboard, eyes fluttering shut at the sensation as your pussy clenches hotly on his cock, rippling as the sensation burns through you. Ronin's fingers stop rubbing your cock, catching the head between his thumb and forefinger as he pinches. You squeal, the sound bursting free of your throat as you writhe while a odd burst of combined pain and pleasure causes your eyes to dart open, looking around desperately for the cause even thought you already know.

'Ro-ronin,' you gasp wetly as his hand returns to its leisurely petting.

''M jus' keeping you on track, baby. Write.' His voice is coloured with amusement as his fingers resume petting your cock gently.

You shudder, pussy clenching and hips making aborted attempts to roll down even though there's nowhere to roll, you're fully seated on him, his cock is pressing up against your cervix and stretching you out fully so bearing down doesn't do anything other than grind him within you. Ronin chuckles lightly, lips pressed to your shoulder before his hands tighten his grip on you and stop you from moving entirely. A whine bursts free from your throat that sounds suspiciously close to a sob as the limited friction you were getting is cut off abruptly.

You place your tingling fingers back on the keyboard, trying to rush through the last few paragraphs as fast as you can, editing dialogue tags and the language the main character uses to try make it sound more natural. You hear Ronin stifle a snicker from behind you and you stop, fingers pausing as you snap, 'what?' your irriation at his teasing finally bubbling over into something tangible.

Ronin pinches your cockheadagain, fingers squeezing harder and holding as you jerk uselessly in his grasp, hands coming up to scrabble weakly at his wrist before he finally lets go and an even more confusing burst of painful pleasure rushes into your cock as soon as he stops the constriction. Your hips jerk harshly, cunt clenching down on his cock as you tremble, stomach tightening then relaxing as the pleasure slowly fizzles out without him touching your cock.

You're left panting, chest heaving and thoughts dazed and disconnected as Ronin pets his hands lightly over your hips and makes soft cooing noises that are full of pity. 'Focus, baby. 'S not that hard,' he says lightly, like he didn't just pinch your cock so hard your vision briefly blurred at the edges and simultaneously denied you the orgasm that was so close.

'That's unfair, you laughed. What was so fucking funny?' You whine out, vowels stretched and distressed.

'Nah, 's nothin'. I'll tell you after, deal?' Ronin denies your answer the same way he denied your orgasm and it only riles your emotions up further.

'I hate you,' you pout, in a mood that he's not giving you an answer.

'That's not what your pussy's sayin'~' Ronin singsongs liltingly into your ear.

You shoot him a dirty look over your shoulder, unsure if he can even see it with how close his face is pressed to your neck, before putting your fingers back to the keyboard and muttering with venom in your voice, 'I'm gonna fucking kill you when I'm done, you asshole.'

Ronin shudders behind you, his hips suddenly bumping up, thrusting underneath you, once, twice, three times as he grunts before he manages to still them with a groan. His cock presses up against your cervix, grinding as his hips squirm weakly. You gasp, chest heaving as you try catch your breath, back arching as your hands scrabble against Ronin's legs and the blanket, attempting to ground yourself at the sudden stimulation.

Ronin pants hotly against your neck, showing the first signs that any of this is affecting him as much as it's affecting you. 'You promise, darlin'? Don't dangle Hell in front of a man's face and then snatch it away without any care now.'

''Nin, please, can we just-'

'You're the one who wanted to play this game, darlin'. There's only one way for you to get out of it.'

'…What if I described how I would kill you?' Your voice comes out meek, a little wobbly as you're unsure how the suggestion will go over.

Ronin hisses, breath firing out from between his teeth as he groans, forehead braced on your back as you feel his cock twitch hard within you. Then, without warning he unhinges his jaw and his teeth clamp down on your shoulder, hard. You try to shriek but your voice is caught in your throat, so instead you mouth soundlessly as pain radiates out from your shoulder and your pussy clenches in a confusing tremble.

He catches your cock between his fingers yet again and squeezes. You squeal, voice finally leaping free as you wriggle in place to try and run from the sensation but Ronin's got you pinned in place with his arm, his teeth, and his fingers. He doesn't let up either pressure, not until you've got hot tears welling up and streaking down your face as you frantically spit out, 'okay! Okay! I'll work! I'll work!' voice garbled and whiny while your hands smack his legs in a desperate attempt to tap out.

You shudder and moan as the blood rushes back into your cock and your shoulder goes numb with tingly pain as his teeth release it. Your cock pulses so hard you're worried you're going to cum, desperately trying not to despite how much you want because you don't think you'd like whatever punishment Ronin will think up for you if you did, but it just clenches tight, contracting in time with the throbbing of your cunt as you try to slow your breathing and relax.

It works, barely. Your pussy pulses, leaking out slick around Ronin's cock like that will get him to move, but that's all the happens before the pleasure receeds as you whimper and whine.

You're not any less worked up though, whole body tingling, breath coming harsh and fast, cock throbbing insistently as Ronin lowers his hand to rub it teasingly light, which is not ideal for finishing your writing.

Each time you get close to tipping over the edge, which is frequently, Ronin stops touching you, tutting and pressing silent kisses to the side of your face, following the wet traces of where your tears have spilt over the edge of your lashline and dribbled down your face with his tongue. You sob in frustration, hips trying to hump but not able to move in his tight grip, cock twitching uselessly without anything to grind against. The only saving grace is that the fullness of Ronin's cock splitting you open gives your pussy something to clench on.

You wipe your face and put your trembling hands back on the keyboard, ignoring how achingly full your cunt is, how insistently wanting your cock is as it twitches every other second even though it's not being touched. You fire through the paragraph as fast as humanly possible while still trying to do a decent job- not because you care about it anymore, no, at this point you hate it, at this point it's your enemy, but because you have a niggling worry at the back of your mind that Ronin might make you redo it if you half ass it and you don't think you can take much more of this.

'Finished!' You shout, practically chucking the laptop off of you and towards the end of the bed as soon as you've saved the document.

Ronin huffs out a laugh against your ear, warm breath puffing over your face as he teasingly drawls, 'not gonna let me check your work, huh?'

You pause, drawing in a trembling breath as you worry that Ronin actually might make you collect your laptop and stay still until he checks your work but before the worry can run too far he laughs again, nuzzling your cheek.

'Don't look so worried, doll. 'S if I could wait another fuckin' second.' Ronin leans back on the bed slowly, arms wrapping tight around your middle to keep you close to him without tipping off to the side as he goes. You have a second to marvel at the raw display of strength he's showing as he slowly lies down before you're laid entirely flat on top of him. You feel unsettled, unsecure in the position but his arms stay so tightly wrapped around you that you couldn't move an inch even if you wanted to, much less slip off accidentally.

Your hips tilt up due to the angle, that fat of your ass putting distance between your hips, drawing Ronin's cock out of you and pulling a whimper from your chest at the loss as your weight rests against his chest. Your disappointment is short lived when he tucks his head forwards to reach your neck, kissing your shoulder softly as his hips start to piston beneath you.

Ronin grunts out his breath, hips laying flat against the bed so that his cock pulls out with only the head left in and then tilting up harshly to push it back in in long, hard thrusts that punch the breath from your chest. Your mind spins, head empty except for how good it feels to be fucked after being denied for so long as the angle of his cock drives against something gooey and hot at the front of your cunt. There's a mild worry niggling at the back of your mind that it kind of feels like you have to pee but you ignore the feeling in favour of chasing the orgasm that's been denied to you too many times to count.

You shove a hand down to your cock, fingers fumbling and skidding wetly over it before you manage to steady your hand enough to grasp the shaft between your fingers and tug. Your pussy feels like it's melting around Ronin's cock, each time he thrusts into you little yelps leave the back of your throat unbidden. Your whole body feels loose and tingly, limbs jerking and trembling where they're trailing off of him as Ronin fucks up into you.

Your head lolls to the side on his shoulder, eyes squeezing shut as your vision fuzzes at the edges. Your cock is pulsing every other second and you can feel the beat of Ronin's heart through his cock. Your pussy squeezes in response and his cock twitches every time you clench down on him. Your breathing comes fast and hard as you play with your cock but your fingers are weak with want, you have trouble keeping your wrist moving smoothly, rhythm pulling too stuccato to make you cum, so you whine breathlessly, desperately, ''Nin, Nin, help me, please I need-'

'Know what'cha need baby. Known all along, c'mere, let me-' Ronin pants out, voice rough and deep. One arm tightens around your waist so hard that his hand is definitely going to leave bruises as the other slips down, down, down, batting your own semi-useless fingers out of the way as he slides his fingers over your wet pussy. He wraps his fingers around your cock quickly and rubs them over the head of it.

The tips of his fingers burn where they've caught your cock but it doesn't feel like enough, it's more teasing that relieving. You moan weakly, breath escaping your mouth in hoarse pants as you try press your hips up into the sensation, wanting it harder or more or something. Ronin proves his words right as his fingers stop their rubbing and clamp down hard on your cock for the fourth time this evening and squeeze.

You squeal, the pain in your cock is sharp and bright but it's everything you need to tip you over the edge into your orgasm. The sound in your throat devolves into a hoarse moan that's more akin to a scream as your cock pulses tightly under his hand, as your cunt clentches down and grips his cock so tightly that Ronin's hips are forced to stop moving, unable to thrust in or out as he swears under his breath, a litany of 'fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuucckkkk,' that you don't hear over the sound of blood rushing loudly in your ears.

You feel Ronin's cock jerk deep within you, pulsing in a heavy rhythm and some distant part of your mind connects the sensation to the fact that Ronin is cumming in you. Pleasure radiates through your body, clenching in your stomach and shooting electricity up your spine, cascading through your cunt and leaving your limbs feeling tingly and weak as your cock convulses in a heavy pattern, throbbing with the rhythm of your release.

At the same time, you feel something hot and wet gush out of your cunt in a short bursts, pushing Ronin's cock out your pussy with the force of it. On it's heels a far slower, far thicker feeling that's entirely foreign to you seeps out of what can only be your urethra in a hot, slow throb that leaves you sobbing, scrabbling at Ronin's arms for something to ground yourself amidst the pleasure.

The feeling drops, dipping slowly into a fading smattering of clenches that get further and further apart as your limbs stop shaking and your breath comes laden heavy and fast in attempts to catch itself. The only thought rattling around your mind as it clears is: …did I just ejaculate? What the fuck was that? As you fixate on the feeling of something hot leaking out of you during the end of your orgasm.

Ronin's voice cuts smoothly through your reeling thoughts as he attempts to dryly say, 'feel good, darlin'?' but it comes out rather breathless, syllables extended and slurred slightly with how relaxed he is. His arms are limp, loosely curled around you rather than holding you to him now so you roll off, flopping to the side rather uselessly as all your limbs feel like jelly.

You nod in response to his question, rolling over in place and then wiggling into his outstretched arms, ignoring how sticky, hot, sweaty you both are in favour of being close to him. After lying there for a moment, positively floating from the endorphines, Ronin's laughter from earlier floats to your mind and you think to ask, 'what was so funny, earlier?'

Ronin snorts, tracing his fingers up the back of your arm as he says, 'nothin' much, Jus' I think our activities may have bled into your writing a little. You're gonna have to rewrite that whole crime scene investigation again, dialogue's a little… horny for a murder scene. Not that I'm complaining but your audience might not find killing and death as sexy as you wrote it.' Ronin giggles, high pitched and incredibly amused at your predicament

'…Fuckkkkk, my publisher is gonna kill me. Y'know what? Fuck it. I'll do it later, I can be a day late. I'm fucking wiped. You wanna get takeout for dinner?'

‘Hey, Ronin?’

‘What's it, baby?’

‘I- um -’ You're unsure of how to even start . How do you bring something like this up? You bite your lip in worry, tuck your head against Ronin's chest and rub your face over his shirt in hopes it will calm you down like it normally does. Your heart is racing ; this should be easy , should be simple , to talk to your boyfriend about this. Yet for some reason it makes your mouth dry and your palms sweat to even think about it. 

You've been dating Ronin for a while now, your friendship having bubbled into something more over a steady simmer during all those months of flirting in the Slaughterhouse. Well, less flirting and more Ronin teasing you while you got steadily redder on camera until you panicked and ended the call. Does that count as flirting? You think it should , it worked , right?

You think that Ronin finds you endearing . Cute. Adorable. Which had worked in your favour before, when you were too shy to kiss him that day in Purgatory. 

When he had asked that fatal question: ‘or are you kissing me?’ He'd watched the way your eyes had gone wide, a heavy flush settling over your face as your gaze darted helplessly between his eyes and his mouth. A sly smirk had settled onto Ronin’s face, and the hand not holding the knife had brushed across your cheek. He'd stepped in close, close enough your breathing had stopped for a second, and he'd said, ‘what’s wrong, baby? Do you want to but you can't?? Is my dear darlin’ writer too shy?’

You'd shaken your head frantically, too caught up in your embarrassment over a kiss to realise what he was getting at. Ronin had drawled, ‘ no? ’, leaned in close enough for his lips to brush your ear as he murmured, ‘Does that mean you're killing me then?’ He’d sounded ecstatic, almost sensual , like that reality was equally as tantalising as you kissing him.

You'd squeaked , hands coming up to grip the front of Ronin’s leather jacket while your head swam at how close he was to you; you could smell him, a mixture of motor oil, something metallic, and …maybe citrus? 

You were hyper aware of exactly how much of Ronin was in your space; his tall form bracketing yours, shoulders boxing you in against the wall, his hair tickling your cheek, his breath puffing over your face, the sharp edges of his grin brushing your ear at the feeling of you swaying into him. 

‘Well, which is it, baby? Are you kissing me or killing me? Come on, we don’t have all day. You gotta pick one.’ His voice was amused, breathless with an edge of venom in the tone. It was clear by his words he was teasing you; like he didn't care which one you picked as long as you kept entertaining him, but the undercurrent to his tone sounded like his patience was running thin, like if you didn’t pick one soon, he would choose for you. 

‘I-Ronin.’ You'd choked out, face burning at how intense you were finding this, at how intense you were making this. It was just a simple kiss and yet you couldn't bring yourself to tilt your head up and connect his lips to your own. You'd walked all the way out here, to a known serial killer's favourite killing spot, and yet you were too shy to kiss him. It’d be funny if it wasn’t so real.

‘I’m The Butcher out here, darlin’, don't'cha know?’ You'd shivered, the feeling tingling down your spine as you whined slightly, swaying into him, your eyes dipping shut against your will. Ronin had let out a happy hum, dragged his nose across your cheek and murmured, ‘Should I have mercy on my poor little bunny? Put him out of his misery?’ You'd gasped, eyes snapping open, frozen in place, as the point of the knife Ronin was holding had pressed ever so gently into your other cheek. You hadn’t even heard him move. 

You could do nothing but stare at it in fear, eyes wide, until Ronin had drawled out, ‘Nah. Wouldn't do that to you, baby. You're too sweet to let bleed out in Purgatory. We’re saving the blood letting for later.’ He’d laughed, short, sharp, and deranged in your ear before pressing a wet, snacking kiss to the side of your face. ‘Need to taste you myself before I let that happen.’ 

Ronin was still snickering quietly to himself as he pulled back to look at you. Your hands were shaking where they were gripped tight, pressing sweaty against his jacket, the cold metal zipper biting heat down into your palm. He'd put the knife away, tucked it somewhere safe and far from you as your heart beat out your chest. Ronin had then gripped you meanly by your soft cheeks, forcing your lips to pucker almost comically as he brushed his own over yours in a twisted mimicry of a kiss. Teasing you with how almost it was, and how sincerely it wasn't . 

Yet the wet slide of his mouth against yours still traced an electric line across your lips, the feeling shooting through you, tingling with desire and stirring a twitching interest in your pants. You'd made a sound like a wounded animal, desperate , attempted to pull Ronin closer by your grip on his jacket but he instead leaned back, used his height against you, and let go of your face entirely. 

He’d murmured, ‘Good boys ask for what they want, darlin’.’ Curled a lock of your hair around his finger and tugged gently. He'd then leaned back down into your space, almost kissing you but not quite, pulling back every time you leaned up into him, keeping a hair's breadth between your mouths until you'd had enough and whined out, ‘Roninnnnnnn,’ breathless and embarrassed. You’d quickly followed it up with, ‘Ronin, kiss me, please,’ heart thundering in your chest. 

Ronin had chuckled . Gripped you by the jaw softly, said, ‘All you had to do was ask , sweetheart’, before kissing you softly, sweetly , chastely. You’d had to chase him when he pulled back, desperate and wanting enough to drag his lips back to your own until Ronin gave in and kissed you properly, all sharp edges and hunger.  

And therein was where the problem started. At first, you'd been worried that maybe Ronin would want to move too fast ; you didn’t have any experience with physical intimacy, and he’d kissed you with such fervour in purgatory that in the days afterwards you’d panicked . Got in your own head about it and started to worry you wouldn't be able to keep up, that soon he'd want more from you than you could give, that maybe he’d grow bored of you if you didn’t keep his attention with sex. 

You’d had relationships start and end in the blink of an eye because of that very issue before, and you couldn’t help but worry that this would be the same , even if every sign pointed to it not being like that. There were all these thoughts in your head, getting tangled and tripping each other up; ideas that he’d get frustrated , that he’d be upset or turned off when he learned of your… naivete, that he’d leave you or worse push you, and then you’d have to leave him . But that wasn't the case, Ronin was, and is , ever the gentleman, and the more time you spend with him the safer you feel , murderous proclivities or not. 

When you'd pulled back from Ronin early on in the relationship, put his wandering hands back into more safe places while you were making out, he'd kept them there. He'd still kissed you in the same brutal, breathless way he did before, making you feel like he was pulling the breath from your very lungs into his own, but he never crossed the non-verbal line you'd set.

You hadn't talked to him about it yet, you weren’t sure you could, because even though he was your boyfriend the thought made you shudder with a strange mixture of anticipation and anxiety . There were too many ‘what if’s, it felt too big a topic to broach on your own and you were scared . You knew you should talk about it, knew you had to talk about it at some point, that Ronin would be nothing but understanding. But every time the thought to bring it up had crossed your mind you couldn’t get the words to cross your lips, couldn’t get over how shy the topic made you feel.

You'd expected-no, you’d hoped that Ronin would try again as the relationship progressed, considering you were too shy to even bring the topic of sex up, but you both never went past making out. Not even after you’d finally gotten frustrated enough that you'd tried putting his hands on you, tried to slide them from your lower back to your butt subtly but Ronin had just leaned back from marking up your neck and said, ‘What is it, baby? What do you want? You got an itch that you need help scratching?’ In that teasing drawl of his, and scraped his fingernails slowly but firmly over the back of your thigh, bypassing your ass completely.  

You didn't know how to handle that ; you’d prepared for him grabbing your ass or something similar and this was the complete opposite. It wasn’t what you had expected him to do, leaving you feeling wildly unprepared so your brain went haywire trying to decide how to react and then it just kind of… shut off. 

Your brain had frozen and you hadn’t known what to do, what to say, how to say it. So you’d just squeaked and wrapped your arms around Ronin’s head, squished his face harshly against your collarbone so he couldn't look up and see how red you'd turned as you'd spluttered out something to the affirmative, scratched your own ass, and then scrambled off him and ran away to hide in the toilet out of embarrassment. You could hear Ronin positively screeching with laughter as you scurried out of the room and away from him. 

When you came back in five minutes later Ronin was sat sprawled out on the couch, a movie you liked already queued up and ready to go on the television as he patted his thigh, inviting you to come back and melt into him with a smug smile tugging at the edges of his lips like he knew. 

Which, retroactively, it’s clear he did know what you wanted, he was just playing with you; Ronin wanted you to admit it. Admit how crazy he drove you, how much you wanted him. He was teasing you, that much was obvious, especially considering the movie he'd had queued up wasn't one that suited his usual gore-happy festivities, more in line with ‘that childish shit’ that he always groaned and complained about when you ‘forced’ him to sit through it. 

You've tried again a few times since then; tried putting Ronin’s hands on your ass when making out and holding them there for a second, but they always wandered back to safer locations after a second, sliding on up to your back, your shoulders, your tummy, and your neck after giving your ass what felt like a precursory squeeze, like nothing more than an acknowledgement that it was there; then you tried putting your leg up over Ronin’s hip after his kisses had made your skin thrum with electricity and turned your cock hard and aching, throbbing in time with your pussy but Ronin’s hips never seemed to connect with yours- no matter how much you squirmed and tried to grind against him without overtly just humping him; you’d tried whining, ‘Roninnnn. Ronin, please…’ against his lips, eyes tearing up with how much you wanted him and voice a breathless whine but Ronin had just groaned. Turned his head away from yours with his eyes screwed shut like the movement was hurting him, lips disconnected from yours with a shiny string of spit strung between them, his fingers tracing up and down your sides as he'd said, fervently, mockingly, ‘What, baby? What do you want? Come on and tell me. Tell the devil what you want, darlin’.’ His voice had turned serious, slipping into an airy murmur of ‘won’t hold it against you, bunny, promise,’ pressed softly to your temple.

You'd have been offended if you hadn't seen how much you were affecting him too. If you hadn't felt Ronin’s hips grind into yours before he halted the movement, if he hadn't tucked his head down against your neck to suck a bruise as you’d gasped and stuttered, if he hadn’t licked a stripe up your throat, dipping up to nip at your lips gently before saying, ‘Tell me, darlin’, c’mon, you can do it. I believe in you.~’ 

You'd stared into Ronin’s eyes, dark with want and need , his forehead pressed to yours as you’d licked your lips, mouth opening and closing as you made several aborted attempts to try and tell him while you quivered under the weight of his gaze and your voice had died in your throat. Eventually, Ronin’s gaze had softened, and he'd pressed a gentle kiss to your lips, and then your forehead, before he'd tucked you safely into his chest and murmured, ‘next time then, yeah?’ 

You'd barely had time to process your disappointment before he'd wrapped his arms around you and rolled you both over so that you were facing the television, and then you'd had to sit through the second half of a slasher movie so hard it hurt , trying not to squirm and cry in his arms at being denied again. 

You'd known what he wanted then, you just couldn’t do it. The same way you know what he wants now, the same thing as then: for you to ask him. And Ronin's a patient man, one who takes some kind of sadistic glee in watching you squirm ; he's not going to give it to you unless you ask him to. You know this . So you're going to. Ask him, that is. Today. Right now. Any second now . 

You’ve already interrupted his ongoing rambling monologue about some ‘scum sucking bottom feeder’ he’s been stalking, now you just need to tell him. Any second now. While Ronin's still semi-distracted by his love of the hunt you're going to say what you want loud and clear, before he gets the chance to upset your determination with his touch, before you have a chance to get shy you're gonna tell him. 

You open your mouth; no words come out. You try again and fail to produce any sound a second time. Third time’s the charm. Come on. You can do this. ‘Ro-ronin.’ You stutter out.

Ronin hums, his hand tracing little circles on your upper back as he says, ‘Yeah, baby? What’s up?’ His voice is light, airy . You’re thinking that you’ve gotten off easy with him being so distracted when Ronin continues, ‘What’s so important that you just had to interrupt me, even though I know you’ve not been listening for the past half hour. What’s eating at that pretty little head of yours?’

You wriggle slightly where you’re laid on top of him, squirming from your discomfort. It’s now or never. Your face is aflame, you’re steadfastly looking anywhere that isn’t Ronin. You take a deep breath before, ‘Ronin-I’m-a-virgin-but-I-think-it-would-be-really-cool-if-you-could-sex-me-up-sometime-soon-maybe-now-please-and-thank-you,’, comes out in one big rush. You immediately bury your face in the soft cotton of his shirt after and pray he won’t make you say it again. There's silence for a beat, and you cringe . Your shoulders are retreating up towards your ears when you feel Ronin’s chest stutter then start to heave before he releases a manic cackle from above you. 

‘What was that, darlin’? You want me to ‘sex you up?’ Ronin doesn't bother to stifle the snicker that breaks free as he says the words. Oh God, you did say that, didn’t you? This has not gone well; you practiced in your head so much and yet you still asked him to ‘sex you up’. Jesus. …You kind of want the ground to split open and swallow you whole.

Ronin’s still giggling when he tries to pull your face away from his chest to look at you, but you shake your head frantically and tuck it incrementally lower, covering your face with your hands. You’re embarrassed , and maybe a little ashamed . ‘ Don’t be getting shy on me now, darlin’ . You finally told me what you want . Don’t you want me to give it to you? ’ One of his hands slides under your jaw and tips your head up to look at him, the other gently pulls your hands away from your face.

There’s an undisguised glee on Ronin’s face when you make eye contact with him but his expression falters at the look on your face. ‘ Baby? ’ Ronin slides his hand up to cup the side of your face and brushes a thumb along the tears gathering in your lower lashes. ‘Oh.’ His eyebrows knit together. ‘We need to talk , huh?’ You sniffle, try to blink back your tears as you nod at him shortly, refusing to make eye contact with him. You wipe your eyes and laugh wetly at how silly you feel, crying over something like this. 

Ronin shifts on the couch, shuffles himself up into a sitting position and uses the arm locked around your waist to bring you with him. Sitting up like this you can see the concern laced into his eyebrows. You raise your hand to try and smooth them out but Ronin catches it and presses a kiss to your knuckles instead. 

‘Why didn’t you just talk to me?’ It’s short and succinct. Ronin does not like talking about his problems, preferring to talk around them or to hide his truths in poetry but when it comes to you , he’s always to the point. He’s always willing to try . You love him for that- you love him for a myriad of reasons but you especially love that he’s willing to try for you. To sit with emotions that he hasn’t so much as looked at in years, even if it makes him uncomfortable.

It’s with that thought in mind that you rearrange so that you’re sat on Ronin, facing him as you twiddle your thumbs together and say, ‘I wanted to . I kept trying , but the words wouldn’t come out and I didn’t know what to say, or how to say it so I tried to show you but that didn’t work and… I got in my head about it. I was worried you wouldn’t want me-

‘ That’s stupid.’ Ronin cuts in.

‘Ronin .’ You say, upset.

‘I’m always going to want you. I- love you. Innocent littlr lamb or not.’

‘Oh.’ You say, the feeling catching in your throat and sitting there. You feel like you’re going to cry for real this time. Ronin leans in and presses a kiss against your cheekbone, just under your eye. You chase after him and catch his lips in a soft kiss, leave your forehead pressed to his when you pull back, eyes closed. ‘I- I just, I’m shy and it- I have trouble- I can’t talk about these things like you can, it’s not easy for me and then you kept rejecting me-’

‘Who said I was rejecting you?’ Now Ronin sounds hurt. You open your eyes and there’s this look of disbelief on his face, a subtle upset sitting in the crease of his brows, his wide eyes, and his open mouth. He looks… heartbroken by the idea , like hurting you was the last thing he wanted and he didn’t even know he was doing it; because you didn’t tell him. A tear escapes confinement and slides down your cheek.

‘Ronin, baby, I-’ You cup his face, look into his eyes and try to gather your courage before burying yourself in his neck to hide as you say, ‘I wanted you to touch me and I kept trying but you just ignored it and I thought it was fine but it’s not ; I want you to want me.’ Your voice breaks as you choke out the last couple words.

You feel Ronin’s shoulders judder as he takes in a shuddering breath. He presses a hand against the back of your head and holds you close to him, ‘I do want you. Want you so much I can barely breathe for it, darlin’. …I just wanted to hear you say it, didn’t mean to push you so far you broke .’ You hear him inhale again, the breath irregular and prolonged compared to the normal slow rise and fall of his chest; you realise with a start that Ronin’s mimicking the breathing techniques you always do when the world gets too much and you can’t feel anything except for it closing in on you. You wonder if this feels like that for him… 

‘Listen, darlin’, where I came from, that godforsaken shithole of a town- where I- escaped, there were-’ Ronin stops for a second, and you think he’s choking up before he voice returns with a vengeance and a venom you’ve never heard before, ‘these men, shit stained, self-proclaimed saints, prostrating God with one hand, doing reprehensible shit with the other behind closed doors. Scumbags who took too much, who got anything they wanted, everyone else’s wishes be damned. I can’t-’ Ronin cuts himself off, looks away with tension in his jaw and a furrow in his brow. ‘I won’t be like them, ever. No matter what.’ He spits with venom. ‘That’s how I became The Butcher in th’ first place.’ Ronin starts tracing slow circles on one of your thighs, when he speaks again his voice is clearer, lighter. ‘Someone needed t’ put them in their place. Make ‘em understand that heaven isn’t open to them, bring a little slice of hell into their lives- their deaths more like.’ He barks out a laugh, the sound thick with emotion and edged with delight. ‘…Show ‘em what it’s like to be on the other end of the stick.

‘So I- I get that you’re shy, darlin’. ‘M not saying you hav’ta spell everythin’ out f’me, I jus’ need you to give me somethin’.’ Ronin looks down at you, tilts your head up to look at him and you wonder if there’s as much emotion on your face as there is on his; you feel peeled open, raw. ‘Some kinda confirmation, a yes, some kind of proof that you want this as much as I do.’ 

‘Yeah, okay… That makes sense. I’m sorry. I- didn’t mean to bring up bad memories for you. I should have tried talking to you about it, not just… y’know . It’s just- this is hard for me.’

‘Nah, darlin’. I could’ve brought this up at anytime, I w’s just having too much fun playing with you to realise we needed to talk about it. ‘S much as my fault as it‘s yours.’ Ronin says.

You nod softly, ‘We’ve kind of been putting each other through it, huh? It’s almost funny .’ You cut yourself off with a wet giggle, sniffle and wipe your nose on the back of your hand. ‘I didn’t- didn’t realise it was affecting me this much, but I- um, I can try be more um, forward about what I’m wanting. For you.’ You fiddle with the fabric of his shirt, twist it in your hands. 

‘That’s all I’m askin’ for, darlin’, a little communication.’ One of Ronin’s hands snakes over yours and grips your fingers, gentle, ‘You’re gonna ruin my shirt, baby.’ Your hands pause in their fidgeting until Ronin pulls one of them into his own, presses the pads of his fingers against yours and slides them to and fro, pushing and pulling your fingers together and apart with his own. 

You’re silent for a moment, content to watch Ronin play with your hand and sit here and feel close to him before you open your mouth to speak, ‘So you’re okay that I'm a- that I haven’t -? Me tell-telling you hasn’t um- turned you off, has it? ’ The last part comes out in a squeak , embarrassed even now to hear yourself say it , even with Ronin already knowing , waiting so patiently while you gathered your nerves, thumb rubbing soothing little motions at the base of your neck . 

‘Darlin’, we’ve been dating for four months now. I figured it out week two when I tried to kiss you with a little tongue and you choked. ’ You feel Ronin’s chest shake where your head is pressed against it as he stifles a laugh at the memory. You flush beet-red as you recall the memory, it having been one you stuffed far down in the deepest, darkest crevasses of your mind and tried with all your might to pretend didn’t exist.

It was the first time you’d felt comfortable getting hot and heavy with Ronin since your meet up in Purgatory. He hadn’t even put his tongue in your mouth really, just licked over your lower lip and brushed his tongue against your own, testing. And when you felt the sweet, warm press of it you had panicked , choked on your own spit, hacked a cough against his face and then had to go get a glass of water to be able to breathe again. 

Ronin had nearly died laughing at the time,. He’d then pulled you close and called you his, ‘poor, sweet, innocent baby.’ Said, ‘was that too much for you, sweetheart?’ …Oh. At the time you’d brushed it off as lighthearted teasing but he really did know. And he’d treated you exactly the same afterwards, to the point you hadn’t noticed anything had changed. 

You cringe outwardly at the memory, face scrunching up as you whine, ‘Ronniiiinnnnnn.’ 

‘What?’ Ronin says, ‘It was cute. My sweet little saint getting all worked up over a little kiss. Can’t wait to see how you react when I kiss you in other, more fun places.’ Ronin’s grin is sharp as he nips at The edge of your jaw playfully. 

You squirm in his lap, whine, ‘Roninnn,’ again and pretend to try push him away, but you don’t actually let him go anywhere with one arm hooked around the back of his neck. Ronin laughs at your antics, arms wrapped around your torso supporting you, he blows a raspberry just under your jaw, causing you to shriek and actively try to actually push him away from you by his shoulders but now he’s the one locked onto you and he won’t budge, he’s just too strong. ‘’Roninnnnn ewwwwwwwww, grosss!’ You screech and he chuckles .

Ronin kisses his way up to your ear and murmurs, ‘I’ll stop if you ask nicely , darlin’.’ He immediately goes back to blowing kisses wetly against your neck.

You squeal, wriggle desperately in his grasp and gasp out, ‘Ronin, please ! Stoppppp, come onnnnnn!’

Ronin cackles next to your ear, ‘Since you asked me so nicely, baby, I’ll stop.’ He leans back against the arm of the couch, grinning, ‘can’t believe you didn’t like my love kisses! and I made them just for you ‘n’ all, darlin’.’ 

‘Those were not ‘love kisses’ and you know it . There was no love in them! Those were evil kisses.’

‘Oh yeah? Good thing I’m th’ devil then.’ Ronin looks so cocky when he says it, you’d think he set it up if you didn’t already know how quick witted your boyfriend is. ‘But… what makes you so sure, baby? Why don’t you come over here and show me what a real ‘love kiss’ is like, huh? Since you’re such an expert ‘n’ all.‘ Ronin leans all the way back against the arm of the couch, arms stretched out behind his head, looking for everything like he’s king of the world. He’s king of your world at least. It’d piss you off if it didn’t turn you on so much. He’s playing with you again, and you walked right into his well laid trap. Your cock twitches in your pants at the mere idea of what Ronin’s implying, but you find yourself frozen under the weight of your own want. 

There’s about a yard of empty space hanging in between your torsos from where you’re sat on his lap, and even though you want this you hesitate to cross the empty space between you both. Ronin’s smug grin fades slightly, gets replaced with the ghost of a concerned frown as he sits up a little. ‘You uh- you okay if I tease you about it, darlin’? The whole,’ he waves his hand around in the air, drawing imaginary circles, ‘virginity thing, right? ‘S like, you’re shy , it’s not like- not a wound or anything, darlin’? Not gonna hurt you if I poke , right?’

You shake your head no, Ronin taps you on your chin and says, ‘words , baby. Can’t read your mind no matter how much I want to.’

You press your lips together before saying, quietly, ‘You- you can tease me. I- I like it.’ The last part is whispered like the admission it is and Ronin’s usual shit eating grin starts to stretch back over his face. He leans up into your space, puts one hand under your ass and the other against your back to pull you fully on top of him while he lays back on the couch. 

Ronin cackles a laugh in your ear as he chatters away saying, ‘I knew you liked it, haha! Knew you liked me, baby. Just had to get you to admit it. Always thought there was a dirty little sinner under all that innocent, saintly outlook. Hells, bet you’re fucking filthy, aren’t ya’, darlin’? Wonder what else I can get you to admit to. Next you’re gonna start saying that my crowbar turns you on and I’ll find you following me out to Purgatory to get a little sneak-peak at the devil in action.’ He keeps snickering between his words; Ronin’s practically purring with excitement at having you in his lap, secure in the knowledge that he can tease you as much as he wants and that you’ll like it, that like him.

It feels like half the blood in your body rushes to your face as you flush beet red, the abruptness of it combined with Ronin saying these things about you makes you dizzy and causes you to sway towards Ronin slightly, the other half rushes straight to your cock like you’ve been electrified and it almost hurts the arousal that shoots through you. Your first instinct is to hide from Ronin when your cock twitches to life between your legs but sat on his lap like this there’s nowhere to hide. You’re exposed , and the thought raises goosebumps along your arms and legs that Ronin’s watching you , seeing and feeling every aroused twitch and wiggle of your hips no matter how you try to control them.

Ronin watches you go red, sees you curl around your arousal like you’re trying to protect it and then straighten up like you’re pretending it isn’t happening, and he barks out a laugh, ‘Awh, my sweet little saint, precious little lamb; I’m gonna corrupt your sweet little aorta until it’s all bloody and bleeding and perfect, just for me, sweetheart.‘ Ronin’s nibbling at you as he says all this, nipping at your ear gently, scraping his teeth over your pulse point, stopping to kiss your lips, licking into your mouth and then biting when you try kiss him back, it’s overwhelming. 

You may be sat on Ronin but you can feel him everywhere around you and you don’t know how to handle it. You whine high in the back of your throat, break the noise off into a whimper when you feel Ronin press his sharp grin against the crook of your neck, scrape his teeth there and say, ‘You like that, baby?’ You nod rapidly and Ronin laughs breathily against your neck in response. You can’t stifle the turned on wiggle that happens where you’re seated over his hips but you think he doesn’t notice. 

You’ve got your hands braced on his shoulders when Ronin finally lets up and lets you catch your breath. You staring down at him, chest rising and falling sporadically when Ronin says, ‘You’re this worked up over a little kissing? Awh, baby. You’re out of your fucking depth; I’m going to devour you.‘

You whimper , the words shooting right to your cock as Ronin’s grin gets impossibly sharper. Ronin’s a man of his word , and you shudder as all the possibilities of what he could mean run through your mind. How do you even reply to that? You can’t , all you can do is look at him, mouth opening and closing as you desperately try to think of what to say and come up with nothing.  

You bite your lip, try stifle the rocking motion that’s rolling through your hips with a vengeance, not wanting to show how worked up you’ve gotten over ‘a little kissing’. Ronin glances down between your bodies pointedly, raises an eyebrow and says, ‘I can feel that, baby. Dont’cha know?’, while grinning. The expression softens as he says, ‘You don’t need to hide from me, darlin’. I want to see you, all of you.’ Ronin puts his hands on your hips and encourages them to roll down against his own. He then leans up and kisses you, softly, sweetly, pulls back like it’s the last thing he wants to do and goes, ‘Hey. Hey. Maul me.’ before snapping his teeth at the air between you. You jump, startled before giggling at him.

‘You’re ridiculous.’ You say, before leaning down and brushing your nose against his.

‘Yeah, but you love me, so who’s really the ridiculous one here?’ Ronin kisses you on the cheek, and you can feel the sharp edges of his grin brush against your skin as he whispers, ‘well? Sweetheart, what are you going to do?’ 

Ronin leans back, looks at you with a challenge in his eyes that he already knows you’re going to fail. You lean down and kiss him, press your lips to his and lick into his mouth with a vengeance, feel his tongue brush your own and shudder. Your hands slide down from his shoulders to his chest. Ronin lets you take the lead in kissing him, leaves his hands pressed gently on your hips as you roll them down against his own. 

The shiny vinyl of his jeans is bunched up around the zipper and the pressure feels good where your cunt lips part around it. The fabric of your boxers are stretched tightly against your cock causing a delicious friction, the head of your cock presses and grinds against it as you rock over him. The sensation burns in a way you're both familiar with and totally foreign to; the pleasure tinglingly reminiscent of the times you’ve spent rubbing your cock while thinking of your boyfriend in private, but turned up in a manner that's overwhelming by the simple weight of Ronin’s hands on your hips, the dark heady gaze of his eyes on you as you rock against him. 

It’s an unbearable tease, there’s this heat that’s sparking along your cock every time your hips roll down against him, and it feels good , too good, and so you can’t quite control the movement. Everytime your hips roll down they twitch and stutter when they connect with his and you just can’t quite get the rhythm right, it’s frustrating but at least you feel in control of the movement, not panicked or unsure for once .

You’re just about feeling capable when Ronin’s hands slide up to cover your own and readjust them where they’re braced on his chest so that you’re cupping his pecs, and then he squeezes . You feel the soft-firm flesh of his chest shift under the pressure of your hands, feel the pebble of his nipples through the thin cotton of his shirt and you whimper . Try pull your hands away in a panic, then abort that movement and try press them closer because you want this, want him; you don’t want to keep running away . 

Ronin’s hands stay pressed firmly over your own the entire time, so he feels the back and forth twitching pull of your arms, feels when your mouth slips away from his, your focus elsewhere and he laughs , breath puffing over your face before he’s seeking out your lips to kiss you hard and suddenly the tables are turned. You may be on top of Ronin but his mouth is a hot and heavy seeking pressure against yours. He brushes his tongue over your lower lip, coaxing your tongue out to play with his. His hands are shifting over yours, directing them, encouraging you to squeeze, to brush your palms and then fingers over his nipples with purpose and suddenly you are out of your depth.  

You whine, break away from his lips, needing a moment to catch your breath. Ronin’s laid back, panting and grinning below you. His hands slip up your arms, leaving a fiery trail of goosebumps as they skate over your shoulders and then down your front to sit on your waist. ‘You want this , baby? You want me?’ Ronin brushes his hands down to your hips, uses his grip there to grind you over his crotch again, then he rolls his own hips up into the motion and you choke. Breath catching in your throat as your mind floods with images of him fucking up into you as you ride his cock. The thought, combined with the motion of his hips under yours is so erotic and so  that you're suddenly caught in the reality that this is happening. You're going to have sex . With Ronin. Sex . With Ronin. Right now.

A wave of heat washes over you, settles hotly over your face, sits heavy on your neck, curls down your spine into a line of tension behind your cock and your hips roll harder into their desperate rocking motion over him. With Ronin steadying the rock of your hips against him the constant friction against your cock blooms into a hot pulse that concentrates in your cock but sweeps across your whole cunt.

‘I need an answer, sweetheart, a simple ‘yes’ will do... Although I'm not gonna stop you if you wanna say ‘please, Ronin, master and maestro of my heart, body, and soul, make me yours, put your thick cock in my greedy little cunt and make me see God’.’ Ronin's grinning, spewing absolute filth from his mouth now that he knows you want to hear it, viscerally enjoying watching you squirm above him as heat creeps along your spine and your cock twitches in interest at his words. The only evidence that he’s not just making fun of you is in the breathless tone to his words, the red flush settled high over his cheekbones, and the way his gaze keeps dipping between you both to where he’s got you rutting your cock against his crotch.

Your mouth opens and shuts repeatedly, words lost somewhere under the want that's crawling along underneath your skin and settling heavy in your stomach, pulsing behind your cock and making your cunt clench around nothing as you imagine clenching around Ronin . Imagine rubbing your cock over his stomach and his hips and his cock. Imagine slotting your cock against his in a wet sticky kiss and rutting against him, feeling every wet twitch and kiss of his cunt against yours until one of you cums and the other gets to feel the hot slick pulse of it against them. Even just thinking about it feels unnervingly good like this. You want to cum like this, with him, on him, any way that he’ll have you even.

Ronin looks at you, calculating, and then leans up to kiss you sweetly. Presses his lips to yours all gentle like and then kisses his way softly across your jaw and down your neck to lave his tongue there. You shudder at the sensation, whine and tilt your head back to give him space to work. You feel his grin against your neck as you shudder with want, feel him kiss you there again and then suck a wet kiss over the spot before he starts whispering, lips ghosting over your neck, ‘Come on, baby. Don’t you want me to spread some of my rot to you? Gonna look at the devil and ask for his sacrament? Want me to defile you, baby? Ruin you in the eyes of God? C’mon, baby, darlin’, sweetheart. All you've got to do is ask. I wanna hear you say it.’

Ronin leans back and looks at you, eyebrows raised, waiting. You swallow the nerves collecting in your throat. You want this so badly it’s overriding the red flush on your face, sidestepping the anxiety in your brain, and overpowering everything in your body that says that you can’t do this, because you can. You're going to. You desperately want to look away from Ronin’s gleeful gaze but you’re stuck, trapped, caught in Ronin’s orbit, and you can’t get out. You know he’ll just pull you right back in if you do anyway. 

You lick your lips before you manage to stutter out, ‘Ronin, can-’ You stop.

‘Go on.’ 

 ‘Will you-’ You cut yourself off, face flushing red hot.

‘Keep going .’

‘I want-’ You breathe out, your hips rolling down against him of their own accord .

‘Nearly there .’

Somehow , you manage to whimper out, ‘ defile me, please, Ronin.’   

‘ There we go. Feel better now?’

You nod shyly , look at Ronin then abruptly look away, you can’t hold his gaze . He’s grinning proudly, a heavy, lovesick look to him as he sits you both up slowly, then taps his hand against your knee and says, ‘up,’ to get you to climb off him before standing up himself. Ronin holds a hand out to you, you look between him and his hand in confusion before taking it. He levers you off of the couch and into his arms, wraps them around you before kissing you sweetly, ‘Can’t have me taking y’r innocence on the couch now , darlin’. ‘S hardly a place to be defiled .’ Ronin snickers to himself before dramatically sweeping an arm underneath your knees and tipping you back into a bridal carry.  

You shout in a mixture of surprise and indignation, ‘Ronin!’, smack his arm in protest but he just laughs loudly as he carries you through to the bedroom.

‘What baby? If I’m gonna be taking your virtue I may as well do it properly ‘n’ all. I’m just paying my respects , playing the role of dutiful, doting husband ‘n’ carrying you ‘cross the threshold.’ Ronin’s laughing the entire time he says it, but you can’t help but wonder if there’s a thread of truth to what he’s saying. That is until he rouses you from your suspicions by kicking the bedroom door open with a ‘bang’, and grinning at your proudly before walking through.

‘Who knew that Ronin Beaufort, the devil’s butcher, was such a romantic, huh?’ You kiss the side of his face, nuzzle into his neck and feel his throat vibrate as he laughs.

‘Heh, only the best for my baby .’ It’s sarcastic, but you know he means it as he lays you gently down on the bed and crawls over you with a lovesick grin. You put your arms around his neck and pull him down to kiss him. Ronin’s smiling the whole time and he has to press his grin to the side of your face a couple times to get it under control before he can kiss you properly. When he pulls back, he pulls back slowly , runs a hand down the side of your tummy, traces his fingers over your lower stomach in teasing little circles. 

‘R’ninnnnnn, don’t tease me.’ You say.

Ronin’s grin gets impossibly sharper, looking for everything like he wants to devour you, before his eyes soften and he rubs his thumb gently over your cheek. ‘I’m going to love you, darlin’.’ He says it with intent, voice getting airy over the words ‘love you’ and you’re reminded once again that no matter how he denies it, your boyfriend is a desperate, hopeless romantic, and you wouldn’t have him any other way. You never had a single thing to be worried about. This is Ronin, and he loves you. 

Ronin leans in and kisses you gently, he scrapes his teeth over your bottom lip as he pulls back. ‘Do you know what you want , baby? Or do you want me to try and find out ?’ His voice dips deeper as he says the second sentence, as slides his fingers beneath the waistband of your boxer shorts and pings it against your tummy. 

You wriggle slightly underneath him, bite your lips and say, ‘I want you , ‘Nin.’ 

Ronin chuckles, ‘Yeah, I know that , baby, but where do you want me? Here?’ He presses his lips to your neck, ‘or, here?’, then to your collarbone, ‘maybe, here?’, Ronin rucks your shirt up around your tummy and leaves it sitting just under your chest, brushes his lips over the bottom of your ribcage, staring at you all the while, ‘down here?’ He brushes his lips above the line of your boxers, ‘lower?’ Ronin asks cheekily, rubs his nose just under your belly button while waiting for a response.

‘’Nin…’ You say, bottom lip worried between your teeth, ‘Please ?’ You ask succinctly, and lift your hips towards him to make your point. Ronin grins at you, wolfish, before tucking his fingers in the edge of your boxers and sliding them down your hips. Your face burns a cherry red as you lift your hips to help him and your cunt is exposed to his gaze for the first time ever. 

You fidget, try to close your legs as subtly as you can but Ronin grabs you by the ankles and gently pulls your legs apart, slides himself between your knees until he’s propped up on his elbows in front of your pussy. You’re waiting for him to touch you, cock twitching and pussy drooling under the weight of his gaze, but when Ronin does nothing but look you start to squirm in place. 

‘Ronin? Baby?’ You ask, voice meek and nervous. Ronin’s head snaps up to look at you and this is maybe the first time you’ve really seen him since this whole thing started. His pupils are blown , with this dazed glaze like sure he’s looking at you but his focus is elsewhere, preoccupied. Namely on your cunt, given the way his gaze keeps flitting between looking at you and looking at it, like he can’t keep away. His mouth is a bitten red, shiny with spit from where he’s been kissing you and his gaze is half lidded, boring into you and heavy with want when it manages to stay on your face for more than a second. 

The whole thing is maybe one of the most erotic things you’ve even seen in your life and you can’t stop yourself from squirming where you’re laid, undulating out from the spine and rocking your hips towards Ronin’s face as you whine, desperate and high pitched in the back of your throat before you manage to pant out, ‘’Niiiinnn, touch me? Please? Pretty please?’ 

Ronin doesn’t answer you, just groans, head dipping down, seemingly in pain , before he looks up to catch your eye and leans down so that his lips are just barely brushing over your cock, teasing you, again. You’ve had enough of his teasing, can’t withstand the ghosting sparks of pleasure where his lips brush, you can’t stop yourself; you keen , one of your hands lands on the back of Ronin’s head as you rock your hips up to connect with his waiting mouth. 

You feel Ronin’s moan vibrate through you where his spit shiny lips part around your cock and you can’t stop the rock of your hips against his face. If this felt any less good maybe you’d have some semblance of self-control but his mouth is hot, wet, and slippery, burning fire around your cock and it’s all you can do to ride the feeling out against his tongue. Gasp and cry as he licks around and then over your cock, presses wet sucking kisses against it as you gasp and cry out at the feeling. You can’t think for how good this feels, you’re near consumed with your want for more. More of Ronin, more of his mouth, more of his love. You’re damn near insatiable.

Ronin pulls back for a second, opens his mouth to ask you something but you think you might cry at the loss of sensation as the cold air comes into contact with your wet cock and electricity zaps through it, stinging . You gasp, ‘ no! -’ before you can think to stop it, make a sound like you’re bereaved , scratch your fingernails over the back of Ronin’s head and lift your head up to make watery eye contact with him. 

Ronin’s grinning ferally , the skin around his mouth is rubbed red and there’s a shiny wetness from your cunt covering his chin. ‘Awh, darlin’ , somebody’s desperate.’ Ronin cackles, high pitched in the back of his throat but he must be feeling kinder than usual, or you must look as desperate as he says because he leans back down and places a loud smacking kiss on the shaft of your cock before cackling a laugh again, and then he slides his wet lips over your cock and sucks it into his mouth while looking you in the eyes.

Your head hits the pillow with a thump, holding his gaze proving too much as you start to whimper and break into high pitched moans. You rut your cunt against his face as his tongue laves wet and rough over your pussy, between your folds, and wraps wetly around the head of your cock. You can’t help the moans that escape you as Ronin kisses wetly at your cock, seals his mouth over the shaft and rubs his tongue against the head of it as he pulls back with a wet suckling motion. You can feel his head bobbing back and forth minutely between your legs, ‘Ronin, ah- fuck, Ronin I can’t- ’ You break off into a long moan, press your cock harder against his mouth, feel it twitch aggressively against his tongue before you start to come on his face.

Your orgasm hits you like a thundering truck; your vision blurs around the edges, your eyes squeeze shut and a hoarse moan is ripped from your throat as the pleasure crests and washes over you. It twitches through your thighs and convulses in your shoulders, rocks through your hips in a fizzing rush that funnels to your cock as it pulses against Ronin’s tongue. Your head slams back against the pillow, and your feet dig into the bed beneath you as your hips surge up off the bed. You can hear Ronin growling low in his throat, and the noise sends another shuddering wave of pleasure through you as one of his arms unwraps from around your thigh and slams over your hips, holding you down against the bedspread as you start to twitch from over sensitivity. 

Ronin sucks at your cock one last time as you tremble against him before you go limp in his hold and he dips his head down to lick over your entrance. Your cunt pulses with aftershocks, gushes slick out against Ronin’s face, clenching around nothing as he licks down the crease of your pussy to catch some of it, tongue rubbing over your entrance before licking back up to your oversensitive cock. He licks back over it and you whimper in his hold, slot a clumsy, sweaty palm against his face to try make him back off, ‘’Nin! ‘Nin, stoppp, ‘s too much ,’ you slur out.

‘’s too much, Ronin, stop.~ Don’t eat my pussy, don’t suck my dick, don’t make me cum so hard I cry. ‘S so much. I can’t take it, it’s too good-.’ Ronin’s teasing croon  breaks off into a loud cackle. 

He crawls up over you so you’re face to face as you grumble out that you, ‘didn’t cry ’. 

At the sight of Ronin’s grinning face you can’t help but smile dazedly back at him from where you’re laid back against the pillows, even as close your eyes, trying to feign annoyance at his teasing you can’t help but beam and giggle your way through it. ‘Awh, baby, look ,’ Ronin lifts a hand and wipes his thumb against your face, ‘you dribbled. ’ He snickers and leans forward to ask you, ‘That good, huh?’ 

You crack open an eye and try frown at him, grumble out, ‘’Nin , you’re ruining my afterglow,’ but the effect is ruined by the giggles that keep escaping you. Ronin cackles at this. Flops himself down beside you and snuggles in at your neck, wrapping an arm over you. You can’t help but burrow closer in his hold, snuggle into him and tuck yourself up under his chin as you laugh; you’re maybe a little giddy off the endorphin rush.

‘So sorry, darlin’. How rude of me. Not like I was th’ one who put you in it in the first place or nothin.’ You can feel Ronin’s voice rumbling through his chest as he talks. ‘Nah, I’m simply a bystander in the best sex of your life, you don’t even need me,’ He flops himself backwards dramatically, throws an arm over his eyes and sighs huffily before continuing, ‘you did this all by yourself, I wasn’t even necessary, nay, it would have been better if I wasn’t here at all-’

‘Oh my Gods , Ronin, shut the hell up!’ You’re laughing as you say it, which takes the bite out of the words but the message still stands, considering that Ronin can and will go on for hours when he gets like this. You slap him on the chest jokingly to emphasise your point.

‘You wound me!’ Ronin clasps his hands over his heart, lifting and then dropping himself onto the bed with a bounce, pretending to actually be hurt. 

You giggle, roll onto your tummy and shake him, laughing as you wail, ‘Oh Gods , what have I done? Ronin? Ronin , baby, speak to me.’ 

Ronin’s laying flat on his back, eyes shut, tongue stuck out his mouth comically, seemingly unaffected by your vigorous shaking. …Which is why you’re not expecting it when he abruptly sits up and tackles you backwards onto the bed, pressing you down with his body and drawing his fingers down your sides to tickle you. You shriek and try wriggle away from him, laughing breathlessly as you try escape. 

You shout, ‘Ronin! Stoppppp, ‘s not fair!’, legs post-sex limp and failing to kick out as you try make space between your body and his.

Ronin pulls you back down the bed towards him when you manage after he lets you get away. ‘What ? So you can kill me and I can’t even tickle you? ‘S not exactly fair , darlin’.

‘I didn’t actually kill you! Mercy! Mercy please ! You know, Ronin! You know!’ You break off into slightly hysterical giggles, broken up only by how hard you’re breathing. 

Ronin cackles loudly above you before carefully dropping his full weight on top of you, then going limp . ‘Dunno. I feel pretty dead to me.’ 

All your breath rushes out of you with a wheezing huff as Ronin lands on top of you, your arms are pinned, folded between you and you can’t get the traction to push him off of you, ‘ Ninnnn.’ Ronin’s heavy , made of nothing but blood, guts, and sinew but he weighs like stone , effectively trapping you beneath him.

‘What?’ He laughs breathily. ‘I’m dead. Dead people don’t move, baby, don’t’cha know?’ He cackles loudly at his own joke before propping himself up on his elbows, ‘Or’ve you started having regrets about killing me yet, sweetheart? Regret hewing my blood to stone and my bone to rot-’ He breaks off into a mad cackle that you feel vibrate through your chest.

‘Oh please, you were rotten right through before I ever even met you, baby.’

‘Oh , talk dirty to me, darlin’, you’re gonna get me excited here.’ Ronin tucks his face against your collarbone and scrapes his teeth there. The feeling makes you shiver, whine and tilt your head back, bare your neck to his teeth so you can feel it as he moves up to press his grin against you. You brush your hand up the side of Ronin’s neck, press your palm to his jaw and leave it there. He tilts his head and presses a kiss into your palm, murmurs, ‘So, do you want to check my pulse, darlin’? Since ‘m dead an’ all.’ 

You hum, and start to slide your fingers down to his neck to where his pulse point should be but Ronin catches your hand, brings your fingers to his lips and nips them before he smiles at you cheekily, ‘I’ve got a better place for you to feel it, sweetheart.’ He kisses at your fingertips, ‘but first ‘ve got to get naked .’ He wiggles his eyebrows at you dramatically and you huff a laugh at him. Ronin climbs off of you so that he can shuck his trousers down his legs, kicking them off his feet and they go flying off the edge of the bed. You stifle a laugh at his antics; you love your boyfriend, he’s so fucking goofy . 

Ronin’s boxers are red and black in a checkered pattern. You can see where they’re wet and sticking to him from where his cunt has been drooling this whole time . Your cock aches in sympathy and you jump slightly from the sharp sting of it. You’ve seen Ronin in just his shirt and underwear before, but it was always with much more chaste connotations, like going to bed, or after a shower, or just lounging around the house together. Looking at him now , armed with the knowledge you’re going to get to touch him sends tremors up and down your spine and makes you clench your thighs in anticipation. 

Ronin catches you staring at him and you wonder if how much you want him is be showing on your face because he grins before crawling over to catch you in a searing kiss. Your pussy may be slowly fluttering back to life but you’re still feeling lax and floaty from your orgasm so it’s all you can manage to try and keep up as Ronin kisses you bruisingly . You’re left gasping for breath when he pulls back, ‘Baby. Baby, baby, baby .’ He murmurs against your lips, ‘want you to suck my cock, want to cum in your mouth, want to fuck you with my fingers, wanna see if I can make your pretty little pussy squirt ‘n’ make your legs shake again.’ 

You nod rapidly, your breath spilling over his lips in hot bursts, nose bumping his. Ronin’s close enough you can feel his smile as he says, ‘Yeah baby? You want that? Which part? C’mon and tell me why don’t you?’ Ronin’s grinning when he pulls back, testing, seeing if you’re any less shy now that you’ve cum on his face.

Your face floods with colour, and you open your mouth, stutter around a lungful of air, then close it again when absolutely nothing comes out. Your head dips down, breaking eye contact with him before you try again, determined, and you just about manage to squeak out, ‘b-both?’, before your voice dies in your throat. Ronin grins at you, catches your face with both his hands and gives you the most over exaggerated, loud, smacking kiss he can.

‘Where did my sweet, shy baby go, huh? My innocent little lamb? You’re all corrupted now, rotten right through. You want both? To fuck and to get fucked, Jesus would weep, baby. Somebody’s getting greedy.~‘ Ronin sounds ecstatic. ‘What dirty sinner corrupted your sweet little aorta, baby? One little taste of heaven ‘n’ you’re back knocking on the devil’s door to take you there again, huh? Well, I’m sorry to say, darlin’, this road only leads to hell. You can’t go back now. S’ too late. You’re mine.’ Ronin’s teasing you when he says all this, a giddy undercurrent carrying his voice, talking for the sake of hearing himself talk, but there's an element of truth as he says it; like he genuinely believes you’re his and his alone; destined to be bound to him in this life and any others. Or, maybe you just want it to be true. Oh Gods, you’re so in love with him it hurts. 

You bite your lip, lean up into Ronin’s space to kiss him sweetly and tangle your hands in his hair, ‘Wouldn’t the devil take me to hell?’ 

‘Not if he wanted to show every dumbfuck up ‘n heaven what they’re missin’. All the great sex they missed out on while protecting their virtue.’

‘Careful , ‘Nin, someone might hear you and start thinking you like me.’

‘Can’t have that, can we?’ Ronin murmurs, before kissing you softly, his lips stick to yours slightly when he pulls back. You reach over, rub your hands up over his hips and start to lift his shirt. Ronin takes the hint and pulls his shirt over his head so that he’s just wearing his boxers. You sit back and pat your thighs with a shy smile to encourage him to straddle you so he’s sat over your legs. 

Ronin leans in and kisses you as you brush your hands over his abdomen, trace over one of his top surgery scars before teasingly pinching his nipple. It’s meant to be a joke but Ronin gasps into your mouth and his hips twitch, one of his hands comes up to grab your wrist in his strong grasp. A smile curves its way across your face, gleeful at the thought of having something to tease him about for once, ‘Is someone sensitive?’ 

But you‘ve failed to take into account that Ronin has no shame, or if he does it is located somewhere very far from what you’re doing right now because he simply slides a hand to hold you by the back of your neck and says, somewhat gruffly, ‘work’s better if you use your mouth , darlin’.’ 

With Ronin’s hand braced on the back of your neck, guiding you to his chest so you can lick over his nipple, blow cold air against it to watch it pebble and hear him gasp, you’re reminded of who’s really in control here. It makes your cock twitch between your legs as you lick Ronin’s nipple into your mouth, suck gently as an experiment and then harder when you hear him let out a breathy moan above you. You use your other hand to brush over and then tug at his other nipple, want burning through you as you feel Ronin’s hips start to rock down against you at the sensation. 

You detach your lips from his nipple for a second, scrape your teeth against his chest, over where his heart is and start pressing a series of sucking, bruising kisses up towards to his jaw. In between them you ask, ‘Can I…?’ as you ghost your hands over the waistband of his boxers. 

Ronin sounds strained , and a little breathless when he says, ‘Course y’ can darlin’.’  You hold your breath as you slide his boxers over the curve of his ass and down to his knees. His pubic hair bristles as the waistband of his boxers slides over it. Your breath catches in your throat, then releases in a heavy rush as the wet seat of his boxers peels away from his cunt and then you can see it, see him .

Ronin’s pubic hair is dark black, kept neat but still pretty long; it partially obscures the view of his hard cock sticking out from between his folds, dark red at the head and a dusky colour leading up his foreskin. The edges of his cunt are shiny with slick and swollen where they part around it and you wonder for the first time how Ronin’s been waiting this long without going crazy . You feel a little crazy just looking at him; he’s so hard, and you can see his cock twitching under your heated stare. You wonder what it’d be like to suck it, how he’d feel in your mouth, against your tongue, how he’d sound . You think you might be drooling.

‘ Like what you see , baby?’

You only realise you’ve been staring when Ronin’s hand catches you by the chin and tilts your head up to look at him. He looks positively giddy with the attention you’re giving him and you find your mouth is suddenly startlingly dry. Ronin snickers at your expression and says, ‘I’ll take that as a yes .’ Your hands settle against the back of his thighs and he leans his weight back into the touch. ‘Hate t’ break it t’ ya’, sweetheart, but you’re gonna haf’ta let go of me so I get these off, y’know. I know, what a tragedy.’ He reaches down and pings the waistband of his boxers that's currently stretched between his knees. His wrist bumps his cock on the way down and you hear him hiss, watch his hips rock blindly forwards to chase the sensation. 

You rub your hands over his thighs, gaze locked on his, hands brushing over his scars as you mumble something about, ‘don’t want to ‘Nin, just want to touch you. Please let me, please, please baby, I’ll be good -’

If Ronin’s grin could get any wider it would be splitting his face in two; you want to sit in this feeling forever. ‘Are you begging to suck my dick right now? Awh, darlin’, baby ,’ Ronin brushes his thumb over your lower lip, settles his hand to cup your face as he presses his thumb in against your tongue. It’s salty, a little musky in reminder of what you’ve been doing, what you’re currently doing and the thought sends a shiver down your spine. You nod around his thumb, careful to keep your teeth away from it as you lick and try pull it further into your mouth.

Ronin’s expression is edged with something sharp at his mouth settles into a wide, cocky smirk. He looks at you with lidded eyes and says, ‘Is that so? Well, I want to hear you say it. C’mon baby, say ‘Ronin, can I suck your cock, pretty please?’ and I might just let you.’ He takes his thumb out your mouth to give you the chance to speak. 

You’re silent for a second, mouth opening and closing around nothing, thinking no sound is going to make it out until, unexpectedly , ‘Ronin, can I suck your cock, pretty please ,’ escapes from your mouth, whisper quiet yet unbearably loud in the silence of the room. You whimper at the sound of your own voice saying something so dirty , and Ronin‘s smirk cracks into a wide grin. You can feel your heartbeat in your cunt, throbbing in a steady one-two alongside the twitching of your cock. You think all the blood in your body must be down there because your head is swimming with the want that’s coursing through you. 

Ronin presses his thumb back into your mouth, pushes down on your tongue with it, curls his pointer finger under your chin and then nods your head for you . Your bottom teeth scrape against his thumb as he does it so you bite down gently, trapping his thumb for a second before releasing it. Ronin snorts , ‘ Touché,’ before he lets go and shuffles away from you so he can take his boxers off. 

You giggle at the sight because try as he might there is no way humanly possible to make a backwards shuffle with your boxers around your knees look cool . Ronin raises his middle finger at you and makes a rude gesture, sticking his tongue out at you, before he flops onto his side on the bed to detangle his boxer short where he’s somehow got them twisted around his knees.

As you watch him struggle, you realise with a start that you might be kind of totally screwed , because Ronin’s rolled onto his back, his feet tucked up in the air above him, wrestling with his boxer shorts where they’re now caught around his ankles and all you can think about is how much you love him. And love him you must, because the other thing you’re thinking about is that with his legs up in the air like this you can see his ruby red cunt sitting shiny and wet between his legs, and even with him doing his best impression of a dying bug, the sight of him wet and aroused for you, leaking slick down over his asshole and between his cheeks because of you, leaves you breathless and breathing heavy with want.

You sit up and crawl over to him, slide your hands up the back of his thighs and bend his knees towards his head- they don’t go very far, Ronin is anything but flexible, but the movement is satisfying anyways. Makes your cock throb at the sight of his cunt lips slowly parting to the open air as his hole is exposed. You desperately want to taste him, want to feel what it’s like when he cums in your mouth, want him to fuck your face. 

You’re so busy staring at Ronin’s cunt, breathing heavy and rubbing your thighs together to feel them brush against your cock that you don’t notice that Ronin’s stopped in his wriggling. ‘...Having fun?’ Ronin sounds amused, like he’s holding back a laugh at how eager you are, the way you can’t keep your hands off of him. You glance away from his cunt for a second to look up at him; Ronin’s flopped his torso to the side to look at you around his legs. From the look on his face Ronin’s barely holding back his laughter, grin stretched over his face, biting his bottom lip, unrestrained glee in his eyes at the way you’ve been feverishly staring at his cunt. 

You’re silent for a second before you start to giggle, leaning heavily against his legs as laughter starts to bubble its way out of you. Ronin bursts into laughter as soon as you do and you’re both incapacitated by it- his legs come down and you end up leaning over on your elbows by the time your giggles abate. ‘Hey, hey, c’mere .’ Ronin calls you up to him. You crawl up and lean over him, he smiles up at you sweetly . ‘Nice t’know you like me ‘n’ all my grotesqueness s’much.’ You splay a hand over his ribcage, sweep it across and tap a steady rhythm over his heartbeat. 

‘I more than like you Ronin, thought I’d been making that pretty clear.’

‘Yeah, yeah, I know. You love me, you wanna fuck me, you can’t live without me, I’m your fix, sweetheart. You just can’t get enough of me.’

You raise your eyebrows at him while waiting for him to finish. ‘Really , ‘Nin?’

‘What? I’m just tellin’ truths, darlin’. Don’t’cha wanna hear it?’ 

You stare at him, unimpressed.

A slow grin stretches across Ronin’s face, ‘I’m only kidding, darlin’! Course I love you. What else d’ya think we’re doing here?’

You try not to smile but your poker face is far worse than Ronin’s so glee creeps onto it nonetheless, ‘I know.~’ You say. ‘Just wanted to hear you say it.’ 

Ronin snorts, ‘ my wicked little trickster ; what devil taught you that one? If you’re not careful you might just stop being a saint .’ He grins at you wickedly, the glint in his eyes letting you know that there’s nothing he would enjoy more. ‘Now , do you love me enough to put my cock in your saintly sweet mouth?’ Ronin starts to part his thighs slowly, clearly going to make a show of it but you have something specific in mind. Something you want so much it makes your heart race and palms sweat to think about it, so you stop him with a hand on his thigh. ‘Baby?’ Ronin looks at you questioningly.

You bite your lip, ‘Actually… I was thinking, maybe… like this?’ You take his hand and pull Ronin upright, lead him to crawl up over you as you lie back against the bedspread. A grin starts to form on Ronin’s face as he realises what you’re getting at.

‘Yeah, baby? You want me to fuck your mouth ?’ You nod minutely, feeling shy at seeing your boyfriend loom over you. He’s beautiful in the way things are when they’re home-made; you think you could worship at his altar forever if he’d agree to be your God. 

Ronin finishes crawling up your body, stops when his knees are by your head and you swallow heavily, nerves collecting in your throat at the sight of his cock, hard and twitching so close to your face, to your mouth . You feel Ronin’s hand card through your hair, ‘You uh- you still okay?’ He asks. Your eyes flicker between his cock and his face, you want this so badly you think you might start drooling, but the weight of Ronin’s gaze fixed on you makes it impossible to speak so instead you nod shyly and run your hands over the hair on Ronin’s thighs. Ronin smiles down at you sweetly before it tips into something edged with danger and your cock pulses with a painful twinge. 

Ronin rubs his thumb over your lower lip, ‘open up then, sweetheart.’ You bite your lip while looking at him, before you slowly let your mouth fall open. ‘ Good boy.’ He edges forwards slightly, adjusts his knees and then his cock is brushing your lips as his hips come down. It's hot to touch, instinctively you lick your lips and your tongue peeks out, brushing against the head of Ronin’s cock. You feel it twitch in interest even at the brief touch and your world narrows when you hear Ronin groan in response. Suddenly, nothing other than Ronin matters- his needs, his pleasure; all you can feel are your hands on his thighs, his hand carding through your hair, his cock bumping your mouth as you lurch forwards the scant few inches between you and try seal your mouth over his cock.

Ronin’s hip rock forwards as you clumsily mouth at his cock, brushing and bumping your lips over it in attempts to get it in your mouth. You hear Ronin chuckle breathlessly above you, and you look up to see him smiling sharply down at you, eyes dark and focused on your face. Ronin bites his lip as he presses his cock into your open mouth, lets it slide in against your waiting tongue as he settles his weight over you, bracing his arms on the wall behind your head. 

The taste of his cock on your tongue is stronger than you expected, musky, and umami flavoured with a bittersweet tang; it’s kind of addicting; you can’t get enough of this, of Ronin. His pubic hair tickling your nose and cheeks, his thighs blockading either side of your head, keeping your focus solely on him, the weight of him, the taste, the feel of his cock twitching against your tongue. 

You whine, a desperate, high pitched noise escaping you as you press your head back into the pillows, put your hands on his ass and push him forwards, encouraging him to use you. Ronin grunts , rolls his hips forwards against your face and his cock drags over your tongue. You relax your jaw, try stretching your mouth open further, push your tongue out against his cock. You hear Ronin moan from above you, his hips pushing down into the feeling.

With your tongue out you can feel the shiny flat line between his cock and his entrance, can taste the slick leaking from his cunt directly . A guttural moan escapes you as it’s leaks into your mouth. Your legs start fidgeting back and forth on the bedspread, and your hips rub back and forth in tiny little circles. You try to suck at Ronin’s cock but you can’t really get the traction with the way your mouth is pinned open. Your tongue just sort of curls around it, so instead you try focus on rubbing your tongue back and forth in rhythm with Ronin’s rutting against your mouth. 

This is exactly what you wanted , Ronin on top of you seeking out his pleasure, feeling like he’s all around you, the slightly helpless feeling that comes with being pinned down by his weight like this; your cock pulses in time with Ronins movements, stings in a way that feels good when you hear the sounds he’s making. You can hear him panting roughly above you, the end of his breaths tinged with rough moans.You open your eyes, you’re not sure when you closed them, but when you open them you are greeted with the glorious sight of Ronin revelling in feeling good . The long line of his tan body is undulating above you, rocking in time with his hips, his mouth is dropped open as he pants and moans, his brows knitted together in pleasure, hazy gaze fixated on your face to where he’s feeding you his cock. 

Your cock is burning between your legs, desperate for attention, so you subtly remove one of your hands from Ronin’s ass and reach down to press two fingers to the shaft of it, one on either side as you start to rub back and forth. Ronin’s hips rock back and forth against your mouth, you can feel his cock twitching on the down stroke as he presses it down against your tongue, feel his cunt drooling slick over your chin and a moan slips out as you start to touch yourself.

‘Feelin’ a little impatient , darlin’?’ Ronin’s pants out above you. You try scrunch your eyebrows in confusion and Ronin understands enough to gesture with his head behind him, grins at you sharply and say, ‘I turn you on so much you just couldn’t help yourself , huh, baby?’ You freeze, the movements of your hand stuttering as your face floods with heat and embarrassment for a split second, before Ronin’s cutting across the fog with, ‘Don’t do that. Don’t feel bad , sweetheart. ‘S not how I- ah - meant it.’ 

He grunts and grinds his cock harder against your tongue, gasps out, ‘’s hot. I like it. Like that you’re so into me you can’t stop yourself, like seeing you desperate and whining for me, like hearing you beg for my cock, love watching you suck it, loved eating your pussy, love you-’ Ronin’s words come out breathy and strained, he’s groaning between them, pushing his hips against your face almost frantically. ‘Love you, baby. Love you so much I feel crazy for it, love-’ Ronin breaks off into a desperate moan, gasps and shudders, his arm dropping to its elbow where it’s braced against the wall, hands clenched tight into fists, curving over you as his body starts to twitch and writhe. 

Ronin’s eyes squeeze shut as he cums, his mouth hanging open in a long, drawn out hoarse moan, voice breaking slightly. His entire body is curling with tension above you as he shudders. You scrub your hand against your cock harder, rock your hips into the motion. The sight of Ronin cumming is hot , and you can feel a moan building in the back of your throat and escaping out your open mouth. You feel his cock pulsing against your tongue, feel it rut back and forth against your mouth in tiny, frantic increments compared to the rolling wave of before, taste the wave of slick that escapes from his hole as it pulses and clenches around nothing.

Ronin’s arm slides down the wall slightly as he stops shaking, his cock slips out your mouth and across your cheek as he lists to the side, panting heavily, before he sort of fumbles his way off of you. One of his legs is still laid heavy across your chest as he collapses beside you. You let go of your cock in favour of rolling over and slipping up between his legs, kissing Ronin being the most important thing to you right now.

Ronin’s wearing a dopey sort of grin, high on endorphins and you think this may be the most beautiful you’ve ever seen him, relaxed and sated and happy . Ronin laughs as you nuzzle his face and you end up pressing your lips to the stretched edges of his mouth. 

You press yourself against Ronin, leaning between his legs as you kiss him lazily, your mouths tracing slow shapes against each other. His movements are slow, tracing his fingers up and down your sides. You know he’s just doing it out of instinct, enjoying the feeling of being close to you like this, but your cock is hard and heavy feeling between your legs, demanding attention by twitching as the his fingers spark fire against your skin.

You wrap your arms around his shoulders and shift to straddle Ronin’s thigh. Ronin’s hands find your waist as you settle there. You shiver as your pussy comes into contact with his bare thigh, hips jerking as your cock brushes against his bare skin, and a moan slips past your lips. You meant to give him a second to recover, meant to ignore the burning need between you thighs but Ronin just huffs a laugh against your lips and says ‘somebody’s insatiable. ‘ S my dear darling bunny gonna be living up to his pet name? We gonna be fucking like rabbits now that you’d had a taste ? Got you addicted, huh baby? He cackles loudly at his own joke, head tipping back before he says, ‘C’mon then bunny , hump my leg. You gotta work for your carrot.’ A manic giggle slips past his lips and you think he’s maybe a little delirious. 

You snort a laugh, more at how ridiculous Ronin’s being than the content of what he’s saying but it’s funny all the same. ‘Thought you already gave me your, um… carrot just a second ago.’ You pause, thinking, ‘this bunny’s already eaten.’ You can’t help but giggle loudly through that ridiculous sentence, but even as you talk you can’t help but roll your hips forwards against his thigh anyway, your cock twitching insistently against his thigh as the mere feeling of being pressed against your boyfriend like this.

Ronin snickers, opens his mouth to retort but you beat him to it, grab one of his hands off your waist and say, ‘actually, um- I want-’ You lift yourself off his thigh, your cunt pulling away from his skin sticky and wet, and bring his hand down between your legs. 

Ronin’s gaze flits down to where his hand is being held just underneath your cunt but actually touching it. ‘Suppose I did promise you something along those lines.’ He leans up and kisses you softly, you gasp against his mouth as his hand makes contact with your steadily twitching cock, and your hips stutter forwards into his grip. 

Ronin slides finger between your folds, rubbing over the flat of your cunt and then against your entrance to gather the slick that's there and bring it up to massage it over your cock. He brushes his slick fingers over the head of your cock, swipes the lubricant over the shaft and then rubs one of his fingertips around the head and over the edge of your foreskin, right where it folds around the head of your cock. Your hips buck into, and then away from his grip. Where he’s playing with you is sensitive, and the pleasure almost burns as he traces his finger around it. Ronin chuckles breathlessly, ‘Does that feel good, baby?’ , baby?’ You nod frantically, eyes starting to dip shut. Just when you think it’s too much, and the pleasure just starts to lace itself with pain, Ronin let’s go and rubs his fingers against the shaft of your cock before scrubbing his hand over the whole thing.

Ronin rubs his other hand across the skin on your hip before dipping it down between your legs too. He grins at you lazily from where he’s leaned back against the wall as he slips his fingers between your folds again and rubs over your entrance. You jerk, surprised at how good it feels to have your pussy touched at the same time as your cock. You push your hips down into the sensation, wanting more but Ronin moves his hand with you, keeps the same teasing pressure until you look at him and see the question on his face. You feel exposed, caught in his downright predatory gaze as you nod, desperately, frantic to let him know that you want this too. 

Ronin presses in with one of his fingers, slowly , and you let out a high pitched moan, feeling every second of it as it burns its way into your pussy. It's so warm , and long, and solid, and everytime you clench around it little electric tingles zap up and down your spine and into your cock. You can’t help but rock your hips into his hand, gaze laser focused on his arms, unable to think about anything other than the fact a part is Ronin is inside you, burning a trail of fire where no one has ever touched before, where you yourself can’t reach.  Ronin, who’s grinning at you like he knows he’s just blown the roof off your mind and that you’re going to need this everyday, forever, until you die .  

You whimper, moans leaking out past your lips around your desperate panting as your hips rock back and forth and Ronin draws his finger out of your slowly. You feel it exactly the same amount as it went in, except the burning line of pleasure it draws in your mounts somehow, and you can’t stop it as your hips start to chase the motion of Ronin’s hand, and you start riding his finger in jerky motions as you struggle to keep your eyes open. 

‘ Good boy ,’ Ronin praises you and your eyes snap open at the compliment, your hips jerk forwards and you manage to see his gleeful expression clearly for a split second before your vision blurs at the edges, pussy convulsing, spasming around his finger and then you’re cumming; cock contracting in Ronin’s grasp and pussy squeezing around his finger. It rocks through you but all you can focus on is the sensation of him in you, how much of your cunt you can feel convulsing around him. You can hear yourself whining near continuously, gasping out desperate breaths around your moans, hips rolling and twitching, body spasming and pussy gripping Ronin’s finger tightly. You gasp and your hips stutter against as the feeling of his hand on your cock turns sharp and you spasm, falling forwards slightly and catching yourself on Ronin’s shoulders. 

Ronin kisses the side of your head and it would be sweet if he wasn’t drawing a line finger in circles on the head of your cock just to feel you twitch spasm from the over sensitivity. You whine, slur out his name and try bat Ronin’s hand away from your cock with a clumsy hand, leaning heavily against him all the while. You feel his finger slowly pull out of you, his hand rubbing up over your hip, pressing gently on your lower back until you collapse onto him with a squeak. Ronin wraps his arms around you, readjusts your sticky limbs until you’re pressed against each other comfortably as you catch your breath.

‘Thought you were gonna make me squirt, no?’ You mumble out against his neck.

Ronin laughs, sharp and loud, surprised by your line of questioning. ‘Baby , you came so fast I didn’t have a chance to get a second finger in there . You want me to make you squirt, you’re gonna have to last a little longer, darlin’.’ Ronin chuckles and you squirm, turn your flushed face further into his neck and scrape your teeth there in protest. Ronin just hums , pets his hand down the back of your head to leave it resting on your neck, content in just holding you to him. 

‘ So , was it everything you ever dreamed , darlin’?’ The question sounds insincere, sarcastic even , but you know he wouldn’t say it if he didn’t mean it, wouldn’t ask if he didn’t want to know the answer. 

You nod your head from where you’re pressed against Ronin’s neck, start absentmindedly tracing abstract shapes over his chest and say, ‘mhm,’ in a sleepy tone.

‘You passing out on me , darlin’? Wow, guess I fucked you good , huh?’ Ronin’s snickering as he says it, clearly joking but you’re too fucked out to argue, so instead you just nod again and snuggle further into his embrace. Ronin snorts, readjusts his arms to be more comfortable and leans his head against yours. ‘Guess we can take a little nap.’

‘Big nap.’ You mumble. 

You feel his laugh more than you hear it, ‘Not a big nap, darlin’ , what if we never wake up?’ Ronin’s being stupid , but it makes you giggle all the same.

‘Good.’

‘Good ?‘

‘Mhm, same grave.’ 

Ronin’s silent for a second before you hear, ‘Shit, darlin’. Didn’t know you liked me so much.’ It comes out quiet; there’s no sarcasm or sardonic overlay that alters his words into a bastardisation of their meaning, just the truth. 

You rub your face against his collarbone and say, ‘mhm, course I do; you’re Ronin. I love you.’  

(also I feel like I missed a couple things from my last post so heres a couple sfw hcs for funsies)

doesn't feel shame over botched social interactions, largely because he doesn't notice they're botched unless he gets an obvious negative response

he's very driven to try again even when he gets it wrong and he thinks about trying to socialise in an optimistic light, no rejection sensitive dysphora here

all his shame/negative feelings about being 'different' stem from his inability to connect, rather from other people shaming him for doing socialising wrong.

it's less 'im a bad human and they hate me' and more 'i'm perfectly fine but i have an inability to feel the way other people feel which means i can't have close personal relationships'

(he's wrong, he's just never had someone interact with him for long enough to develop that kind of connection, partially because people find him off putting partially because he's a recluse)

NSFW headcanons

virgin

bit stereotypical but hes so virgin coded stuck up in his tower alone with only his hand and 30 case files for company

if he's not a virgin then he's had sex a total of like 14 times, all one night stands that he's stumbled backwards into or propositioned someone directly about by saying 'do you want to have sex?' after he's perceived interest, OR he's hired sex workers in the past

man has no fear of rejection, if he's interested in someone and thinks theyll be interested in him he will just walk up and talk to them but thats a big IF considering he can't normally tell when people are interested in him.

in scenarios where he's had sex before normally they've approached him first and he's probably only out in public because a case dictated it, so it hasn't happened a lot

in ones where he's a virgin hes (a) going to miss ALL cues/hints that you're interested unless you're very obvious with your crush and have given him like 3 months to mull it over, and (b) will straight up tell you he's a virgin and and expect you to show him the ropes/what you like

(you will not believe him because after a few stumbles and a sloppy kiss he's pretty much figured it out and is treating sex like an exciting new puzzle to be the best at)

(and I'm talking about the shy kind of crush not flirting kind of crush because L only recognises that you have a crush at all because hes studied what facial expressions mean and even then it takes him a good while to put it together, he might have inklings from the start but it takes like 4-6 weeks of you being obvious about it for him to be any kind of sure and even then it's not sure-sure its just sure- which is not at all very sure for a person who works in percentages)

he's got low sex drive, imo the only thing that really motivates him in life is his detective work so everything falls wayside to that. this is to the point he spends days on end awake and falls asleep on the couch upright where he was working so realistically he can't have that high of a sex drive or it'd get in the way

this or he has problems figuring out what goes on in his body so he just doesn't feel it when he's horny

that being said- sexual stimulation is his favourite stimulation, so even though he has a low innate desire for sex, after y'all start fucking he wants to have sex to help fall asleep, when he's stuck with a case, in the morning to wake him up, if he's bored or is craving some kind of sweet that he can't have (for whatever reason)

very into cockwarming, if he could sit all day in front of the computer working on cases with your mouth on his dick he would. he's not even aiming for an orgasm he just enjoys sexual stimulation so much if he would have it at a low level at all times he would

if he's stuck on a case he will ask if he can play with your pussy/cock to help him think (the same way he is always stacking sugar cubes/milk tabs when working on the kira case)

if he's depressed he wants to eat your pussy/suck your cock because it allows him to focus on one thing and to do that one thing well, very much giving service top/pleasure dom vibes, he likes to win and if you cum 14 times because of him then he's won sex

(occasionally he will get moody and sulky if he 'loses' sex, its not super serious but you will need to talk to him about it lest he develop a complex because you're likely the first person he's had sex with)

sex very quickly becomes a way to self regulate, he also likes the level of control the interaction gives him once you've settled into a routine so he knows what to expect

if you want to try anything new in the bedroom you need to tell him about it beforehand as he has trouble accessing his emotions in the moment and can't always tell if he wants something without prior thought, it would also interfere with his routine which is another reason he'd need to be told beforehand so he has time to accept it into his plan for the day

treats sex like you with a puzzle to start with, he's very motivated by the noises you make and figuring out the best way to get you to make those noises,

he can get very focused during sex and has a tendency to barrel you right through orgasm into overstimulation so it's a good idea to have a safeword picked out prior

kind of intimidating and very intense during sex, expect eye contact and a lot of borderline creepy staring as he observes your reactions. he's completely unmasked during this time (not that he's that good at hiding his autism at other times) so if you make any kind of joke during or try and break the tension with humour you're going to have to explain the joke

he's a little sadistic but prefers overstimulation to orgasm denial, only uses denial if he wants something from you (like an apology or to come around to his way of thinking- it's not the healthiest of dynamics but hey! you're probably his first everything including friend so he deserves some leeway)

it's your choice whether you want to ask him to stop this or not, normally he only does it for silly things like if you ate the yoghurt he was saving (without telling you this) and he wants an apology or if he needs to persuade you that yes, it is normal and not a waste of water and energy for him to use a new towel for every shower because the old towel is dirty after he uses it once

thats about all i have at the moment! ty for the ask i had fun writing this!

(also as a freebie and because I felt they didnt fit with the atmosphere of the prev HC's here's some more disturbing and less than sexy NSFW headcanons that i thought of while writing the above)

if you like Watari maybe don't read these I don't have a particularly positive view of him as a man (but do appreciate him as a character necessary for enabling L's social reclusion)

CW for emotional incest!

you will have to be the one who sets boundaries to do with exhibitionism, L is completely fine with low level sexual contact in front of Watari (and others, not strangers per se but people who are working with him for an extended time, he only recognises this is inappropriate with women because he's seen workplace harrassment when working cases before and knows theres a power imbalance) and you have to explain to him that this isn't something he should be okay with

L can distinguish that full on sex in front of Watari would be strange as he is kind of a parental figure and that would be gross, but if you're doing something like cockwarming or he's masturbating you and the intent (for him) isn't orgasm then he doesn't quite see the issue with it because to him the stimulation isn't driven by explicit sexual desire it's just an enjoyable sensation

this is due to the mildly emotionally incestuous nature of L being both boss and child to Watari and boundaries being blurred in his mind from being raised with very shaky boundaries on what is 'normal'

(imo L and Watari's relationship is unhealthy due to Watari both raising L and basically doubling as his employee, L has been permitted extreme levity in terms of parental discipline because to Watari nothing is more important than L solving cases and being a super genius, so L gets what L asks for even if it would be detrimental to his overall development)

if he's hired sex workers its a 50/50 split between him doing it himself because he's excited about a new social venture or him straight up asking Watari and Watari providing bc he would. he would totally do that for his son/not-son/boss andact like it's weird not at all even though it is

‘What'cha doin’, baby?~ …Little bit of internet stalking? …Window shopping? You fed up of me already?’ You can hear the fake pout in Ronin's voice as he rests his head on your shoulder, wrapping his arms around you from behind but you're not in the mood to play. You quickly click and close the tabs you’ve got open before spinning around to face him, hoping you moved fast enough he didn’t see what you’re doing.

‘Nothing, baby.’ You nuzzle your face into his neck, wrap your arms around him. ‘Was just reminiscing.’ You hope that you're convincing, hope he can't hear the strain in your voice. You had been looking at the social media page of someone you used to know, but you certainly weren't reminiscing.

You were more… dreading. And researching. And panicking. Hoping that if you looked hard enough you would figure out the secret code for finally getting your ex to leave you the damn fucking hell alone because getting a restraining order had so far fucking failed and you're getting desperate. 

Well, hadn’t failed in the traditional sense of not working but more in the sense that the police have said they won’t help you because your ex technically hasn’t done anything to you… yet. And the court requires evidence to issue a restraining order- evidence such as a police report that you don’t have because the police won’t help you! 

It started about a month ago when suddenly you were seeing them around town after nearly a year of no contact. Which in itself wasn’t that odd- you’d figured they’d just moved to a nearby area recently by coincidence. That some occurence in their life had landed them near you and that was that. It wasn't anything to worry about at first, just the odd meeting here and there; at the grocery store, on the street near your work, a couple times in a nearby park. 

You’d ended on weird terms with them so bumping into them around town was a little awkward but that was it. You’d only dated for a couple of months but even that was long enough for several alarming red flags to rear their ugly heads and make you run for the hills. 

It was little things at first like asking if you were really going to wear that, or ordering for you when you went out to eat. But then they moved in with you. You hadn't really wanted them to but their apartment had flooded and they needed somewhere temporary to stay while their landlord fixed the place.

Pretty soon they started complaining when you went out at night, saying they were lonely and insinuating that it was your fault, suggesting that you having friends was making them feel worse like their emotions were your responsibility, guilting you for being happy, picking fights and just generally playing the victim when you were just trying to live your life.

They even went as far as to suggest that going out alone at night would be ‘unsafe’ and that maybe you should just stay at home even though you were going out with your friends so you wouldn’t be alone anyway. Then during the day they would shit talk your friends like it was normal, trying to convince you that your friends were bad for you.

It had quickly become way too much, and after getting in several dead-end fights about it where you’d fought viciously for your bodily autonomy and they’d simply refused to concede that what they were doing was in any way wrong, you’d broken it off.

You kicked them out, telling them to stay with anyone fucking else and ignoring the guilt trip that followed. You just happened to move flats a month later purely by coincidence and you hadn’t seen them since, until now that is. 

It wasn’t an issue at first. Sure it was a little weird seeing them around town but you figured that the awkwardness would fade as time went on. You’d even told Ronin about it, that some dickhead you used to date had moved into the area. Mentioned it as a passing comment when telling him about your day and then moved on to another topic because it wasn’t anything to worry about, and really it wasn’t.

That is until you got a message from them asking you out. Like on a date. You were a little confused as you hadn't so much as spoken to them since they moved nearby, let alone given them your number.

You’re also pretty sure it changed when you got a new phone last year, but you suppose they could have gotten it off your social media somehow, or maybe they got lucky and the old number worked somehow. Either way, you didn't question it too much because they were just asking, no harm, no foul. There's nothing wrong with asking.

So you replied, because it would be rude not to- right? You sent a short, simple message explaining that you were flattered but that you had a serious boyfriend, and weren’t interested in anything more than a cordial relationship as acquaintances. The next text came instantly, like they had just been waiting to send it. “Asshole.” 

Which was unsettling, sure, but nothing to worry about. Who hasn't had some scorned ex-friend or relationship call them mean names when they got rejected in this day and age? Then there was a bouquet of flowers delivered to your door a day later, red roses with a card that simply said, ‘I’m sorry, forgive me?’

You knew Ronin was a romantic but you didn’t think he was the type to apologise with flowers, at least, not these kinds of flowers. No, he was more likely to turn up on your doorstep covered in blood with a handful that he pinched from a gravesite for you so you knew they weren't from him. 

Plus you both hadn’t even had so much as a minor spat in weeks, so you didn’t know what they could possibly be for- but they couldn’t be from someone else, you didn’t want them to be. It was nothing, they were flowers, nothing sinister about it but they lingered in the edge of your vision all day and unsettled something deep within you.

So you’d waited apprehensively with a pit in your stomach until Ronin came over after work and then asked him, saying you appreciated the flowers but you didn’t know what he could be apologising for. 

Ronin had taken one look at them and pulled a card out of the middle that you hadn't seen, ‘Wrong delivery, darlin’. Some poor fuck’s stuck in the doghouse because they wrote the address wrong- ha!’ He then flipped over the card to show you the address on the back.

Your heart had sank- not at the address because that could have been a mistake, but at the name written above it- it was the stupid, cringe petname your ex had used for you, the one you always hated but felt too awkward to tell them that about because they seemed to like it so much. 

You spent the rest of the night stuck in your head, convincing yourself that it was a coincidence, a minor freak in the fabric of the universe that someone sent flowers to the wrong address and just so happened to call their partner the same stupid pet name your ex called you. A fluke. It had to be, they didn’t even know where you lived for Christ's sake!

…It wasn’t a fluke. You woke up the next day to a text from them that read, “Morning sunshine, did you get my flowers?” You blocked the number then and there- after sending a message warning them not to contact you anymore and that you would be calling the police if you found them anywhere near your flat ever again.

Unfortunately, the warning did little to deter them and it only escalated from there. It started as a trickle at first, an odd call from a blocked number, a spam email that didn’t make any fucking sense, and for a brief moment you allowed yourself to believe you’d gotten rid of them. 

Then the texts started coming in from random numbers, your phone ringing at all hours until you learned to keep it on silent, and the countless threatening emails from burner accounts- it was like they were making them faster than you could block them. 

You’d tried changing your accounts and phone number, deleting the old ones and starting anew but it made no difference, and the knowledge that they could find you even when you tried to hide was somehow worse than just giving up and letting it happen.

That’s when you started seeing them around town more often, only ever as a glimpse from a distance but so often that it was unnerving and you felt unsafe just being outside. Like you were being watched from all corners, you started feeling unsafe even when you were alone. 

The kicker was when last week they started hanging around outside your work for hours on end. You could see them through the window just watching you while you worked. They were always gone by the time you got off shift but you started taking taxis home just to be safe anyway.

That’s when you’d gone to the police. And when you’d learned that the police and court were useless because since your ex technically hadn’t done anything illegal they decided there was nothing they could do for you. Apparently 'feeling threatened doesn't equate to being threatened'.

You’d cried when you found out, so desperately crushed by this information that you’d considered finally telling Ronin about it, but it'd being going on for so long at that point that your desire not to burden him had turned into a desperate embarrassment at how you were failing to handle it. 

You can hear it loud and clear in your head, his mocking laugh, the assertion that you should have been able to handle this yourself, the disdain at you not being able to just kill him the way Ronin himself would.

Even if he wouldn't ever actually say anything like it, you can hear it loud and clear in his voice even now, ‘Aw, baby. You hang out with serial killers all day, every day, see our bloody delights in the chatroom, date one of us and let him into your home but you can’t even handle a pitiful stalker?’ 

You know in your right mind that Ronin wouldn’t, that the cruel things you’re imagining are just that- figments of your imagination, but you can’t shake the thought. Can’t shake the fear that he’ll find you pathetic and then not only will you have a stalker but you’ll also have no boyfriend to come home to.

So that’s why you’re here now, hurridly closing tabs and hiding your phone from your boyfriend. You know he’s noticed something’s up, that he’s seen how stressed you’ve been the past few weeks but he hasn’t outright asked you about it yet.

Ronin knows that you have trouble talking about difficult things, knows you have a tendancy to try handle everything yourself and that him trying to help before you're ready might just result in you getting upset with him so he doesn't.

Ronin's good like that, he understands that your life is your life and he isn't going to ask you to change how you live it, though he's won't hold his tongue if he disagrees with your choices. A part of you can't help but think it'd be nice for him to just fix it for you but you're too ashamed to ask.

It's probably driving him crazy, knowing that something is up and not being able to fix it. You can see that he's been making a deliberate effort to make you feel better but it all just makes you feel shittier for lying to him. 

Doesn’t help that you haven’t had sex in about three weeks. You’ve not exactly been in the mood when every other second you’re paranoidly glancing out the window, or checking your phone then putting it face down, or staring abysmally at their social media page like it will crack their psyche and give you answers on how to fix this. 

Which is where you are now, with Ronin settled over your shoulder looking when you don’t want him to know. ‘Someone you’re missing?’ He asks, drumming his fingers along your arm. 

You shake your head, slip your hand up to entwine your fingers with his and say, ‘It’s nothing. Just someone I used to know popped back up recently. I… wanted to see how they were doing, I was just being nosy.’ You laugh weakly, wincing internally at how fake it sounds even to your ears. 

Ronin hums thoughtfully, and you think for a second that you got away with it before his cutting, dry voice slices through you with a snort, ‘Liar.’ You tense at being called out on your bullshit, but for some reason Ronin doesn’t push like he normally would, just pulls you out of your computer chair and over to the couch to play on his gameboy, chatting noncommittally about how you’ve almost beat the last level and he wants to watch you defeat the boss. 

You don’t get it- what his game is or why he’s being so nice when he knows something’s up but Ronin doesn’t ask and you don’t want to tell so you don’t. It takes you a while to relax because of this but it comes easier with Ronin wrapped around you like a limpet. 

Eventually you get so absorbed in the game that you don’t flinch when Ronin kisses the side of your face then peels himself off with a murmur of ‘bathroom,’ and disappears for a good ten minutes before returning. You only glance at him briefly when he returns and plasters himself along your side.

It doesn’t take you long to defeat the boss and win the game. When you do Ronin cheers for you obnoxiously from where he’s pressed against your side. It’s only after your makeshift celebration wherein Ronin rolls himself on top of you and presses kisses along your shoulder and up your neck to your mouth that he reveals where he actually went when he disappeared by dropping a leading, ‘...So baby, are you gonna deal with them or am I?’

You freeze underneath him. Ronin doesn’t know, does he? No. He can’t. You put so much work into hiding it. You decide to play dumb, hoping against hope that somehow, someway, Ronin is talking about something, anything else. You laugh nervously, plaster on a fake smile and say ‘What? I don’t- what are you talking about, Ronin?’ 

It seems he's gotten fed up of waiting for you to tell him what's wrong. Ronin raises his eyebrows at you, pinning you with a deadpan stare and you can’t escape his gaze with the way he’s literally sandwiched on top of you, preventing your escape from this uncomfortable conversation. He clearly doesn’t buy your bluffing and there’s one question that's broiling through your mind and it's, ‘Exactly how much does he know?’

Ronin's stare turn hard when you don't say anything, and he leans down close so that you're nose to nose. 'Get that fake shit outta you, darlin'. Fuckin' lyin' to me? What's the point in doing it now? I already know. C'mon, make your confession to the devil. Promise I won't make ya' pay too much penance.'

His eyes shift between yours, searching but when you still don't speak he rolls his eyes and starts speaking again, ‘C'mon baby. Been saying I’m gonna make a killer out of you yet and here’s our perfect opportunity! ‘S almost providence, can’t pass up such divine intervention, can we?’

When you don’t say anything, your voice being lost somewhere down in your stomach, he continues, ‘What? Deal not sweet enough for you, darlin’? Okay, okay… how about… slice up this bastard that’s been botherin’ you and I’ll love you forever, baby.’ 

Ronin puts on a fake ooey-gooey voice, snickering right in your face as he says this and for some reason that’s what pushes you over the edge- the thought that this nightmare you’ve been living for about a month now, the one you’ve been so desperately been trying to hide is funny to him. 

You start to cry. Like really cry. Ugly cry. Big heaving sobs right in your boyfriend’s face. You screw your eyes shut and bring your hands up to try hide behind them but Ronin catches you by the wrists and prevents it. 

‘Aw, you poor thing.’ You hear him say dryly, and it just makes you cry harder. 

‘Ronin, stop it. I’m scared.’ You manage to whimper out.

‘Good. You’ve finally stopped fuckin’ lying to me.’

You whimper and slit your eyes open to look at him, sniffling and blinking in attempt to stop the tears that blur your vision. Ronin looks deadly serious, eyes wide and deranged, trained on you without even a hint of his usual humour or sarcasm and for the first time in your life you understand what it’s like to be afraid of Ronin. 

Ronin sits back to put some distance between you, ‘God above it’s being fucking hell watching you scurry around acting all freaked out and nervous trying to hide this shit from me for weeks! Baby, I’m the fucking devil.’ 

He raises a hand to his head and mimes blowing his own brains out. ‘What in the world made you think you had to hide this from me? I coulda fixed it before it started, you only had to ask.’ He looks exasperated, like he can’t understand why you made the choices you did and suddenly you feel silly for trying not to burden him with this, like you've been being stupid. 

’I just- …I didn’t want it to be real.’ It comes out in a half whisper, the admittance that if you said it out loud that would only make it that much more terrifying. Ronin’s face softens, the exasperation slipping right off of it. 

He gives you back your hands and you hastily wipe the tears and snot off your face while looking away from him. Your lip trembles as you barely manage to get out, ‘I- I didn’t want to burden you. It’s my problem, I-I should be able to deal with it, i-it’s my fault anyway I-’

‘Stop.’ You flinch and look up at him, Ronin looks disgusted. You cringe away from the expression, shame starting to curl through you but instead of berating you or saying something cruel he says, ‘A stalker is not your fault, darlin’. No way in hell.’ 

You bite you lip, unsure, and Ronin lets the barely restrained rage slide off his face at the worried look on yours. When he speaks again it's far quieter, more controlled. He strokes his thumb over your cheek ‘I thought you’d have got this by now; rat bastards like that only understand one language; violence.’ He does jazz hands as he says it but it’s not at all funny. 

You frown at him but Ronin just smiles wryly, boops your nose with his knuckle and says, ‘Don’t worry so much, darlin’. I got you. Slaughtering’s my game, and you’ve just given me a whole new playground.’

Ronin grins at you, all teeth, and you shudder to think about what he has planned so you don’t. Just nod at him distractedly and pull him down onto you so you don’t have to think about it anymore.

The next few days pass much the same as before but you feel better, lighter now that Ronin knows and you don't have to hide how worried you are all the time. You even relax enough to have some fun.

It also helps that you're no longer receiving threatening calls and texts due to something Ronin did to your phone, the technological wiz that he is. It's such a relief to not have to think about it all of the time every day. You didn't realise how much of your energy was devoted to dread until it isn't.

But still your ex is out there. And just because you're not getting the messages doesn't mean they aren't sending them and that fact still lingers in your mind. So when you leave for work on Monday you still take a taxi even though its a just short walk.

You see your ex three seperate times that day but Ronin is texting you consistently throughout so you can't find it in you to worry too much when you know it'll be over soon.

You see them again on Tuesday, and then on Wednesday and even though you're not worried per say, you do start to wonder whether you should ask Ronin exactly what his plan is because while it feels like everything has changed, technically you're still being stalked. 

You consider calling out of work for the rest of the week just so you can get a break but when you float the idea to Ronin he simply kisses your forehead and says, ‘What, after I’ve been through all this trouble? One more day baby, alright?’

'I just- I want it to be over.'

Ronin nods, 'It will be, just need to take a few days making sure it can't be traced back to us, okay? This asshole has one hell of a digital footprint, and I gotta erase the CCTV outside your work too.'

You swallow your nerves and nod, trusting that Ronin knows what he’s doing and that you have nothing to worry about- like he said.

When you leave work the next day Ronin’s waiting for you, leaning casually against a lamp post outside and you can’t help but be elated when you see him, practically throwing yourself into his arms. He laughs at the enthusiastic greeting and smooths your hair back from your face, ‘Somebody’s happy to see me.’ He teases.

‘When am I ever not ?’

‘Touché. C’mon let’s go. We’re walking home today.’ 

‘But Ronin-‘

Ronin shushes you quickly, says, ‘Trust me, darlin’. This way's gonna be way more fun.’ 

He winks at you then slings arm over your shoulders, steering you away from your work and the direction of your flat. You look up at him in confusion but he's not looking at you he's looking straight ahead, making conversation as if he isn't going the wrong way, ‘So how was your day, baby? That loser still trying and failing to get your attention?’ 

Ronin’s talking far louder than he needs to be, voice full of amusement and derision. You’re confused for a second before you catch on- your ex, your stalker, the loser in question must be within earshot. 

You laugh and it sounds awkward and strained to your ears but hopefully it's not noticeable, ‘I don’t know, I’ve been ignoring their messages. It’s not like they’ve got anything worthwhile to say anyway.’ 

Ronin grins at you, eyes alight with excitement and you can't help but smile back at him even as your skin prickles and the hair on the back of your neck stands up. You giggle, suppressing the urge to look behind you and leaning into Ronin as you stroll down the street at a slow pace.

Even though you can hear it thundering in your ears, your heart feels lighter than it has in weeks. While you don’t know what Ronin is planning, it is an incredible relief to know that it's going to be over soon. 

You’re so giddy with relief that you don't pay attention to where you're going, and when Ronin pulls you to the side, off the street and presses you against the grimy wall of a dirty alleyway you don’t question it.

Instead you press yourself into his wandering hands and let him kiss you silly, pulling your leg up on his hip. He presses kisses over your face and lets you cling to his jacket, you're almost giggling too much to kiss him back.

You should probably be worried, given that it's all about to finally come to a head but with Ronin surrounding you like this, gazing at you with dopey, love sick eyes you're finding it hard to think about anything else.

Which is why it takes you by complete surprise when someone bodily rushes Ronin and tackles him to the floor. You watch as Ronin falls, and a shriek slips past your lips even as his wholly entertained cackle rings high and clear in the air and the pair go skidding to the ground before you.

From the offset its obvious who's winning this fight, Ronin might be underneath your ex but he's seemingly unbothered, enjoying himself and laughing as your ex tries to throw a punch and it misses, hitting the ground and hurting their hand instead.

It's clear they've never actually been in a fight. Ronin cracks them on the side of their head with his elbow while they're busying cussing over their sore hand and they tip sideways as they clutch their head. The way they're leaning shifts their centre of gravity Ronin takes the opportunity to shove them off of him and shunt himself out from underneath in one smooth motion.

Your ex careens headfirst into the wall and Ronin laughs freely as he stands up, dusts himself off, before kicking them as hard as he can, hitting them squarely under the ribs with his spiked boots and knocking the wind out of them.

Your hands fly up to your face, covering your mouth in shock. You never doubted him for a second but you can't believe how quickly he went from being surprise attacked by them to beating the shit out of your ex.

Ronin catches your eye and winks while your ex is coughing and hacking on the floor, gasping for air. You swallow, breath catching in your throat as you try ignore how turned on watching this is making you.

Ronin saunters up the alleyway to where he's left his crow bar just sitting in plain sight, propped up against the wall. He must have left it here earlier on purpose. Your ex groans and starts getting to their feet but they're too slow and Ronin's in front of them already.

He drops the weight of the crowbar on their shoulder, not hitting them just letting them know it exists. They look up at it and scoff, 'What? Am I supposed to be afraid? Like you're really going to hit me with that.' They push the crowbar off their shoulder with a huff and finishing climbing to their feet.

Ronin's grin is so wide it's nearly splitting his face. He glances back at you to make sure you're watching before he says, 'Wanna bet on it? How about… your life?' He snickers like he just told a funny joke, 'You willing to die on this hill, fucker?'

Your ex spits at his feet and raises his fists like he really thinks Ronin isn't going to use the crowbar. That’s when Ronin swings the crowbar and hits them solidly in the knees while laughing.

The scream they let out is piercing and even though you were expecting it you still flinch in shock. Even though the rational part of your brain already knows that he's a serial killer, part of you can't believe he actually hit them with it.

Your ex goes down like a sack of bricks. They're screaming before they hit the ground. clutching at their very broken looking knee and shouting, 'What the actual fuck, man? What is wrong with you?' You can't help the giggle that spills free from your mouth, sharp and clear, unrepentant in the air. Your ex is panting, wailing and moaning on the ground when their eyes lock onto you at the sound.

'And you, what the fuck is wrong with you dating this fucking psycho-' They're cut off by their own ear splitting scream as Ronin's crowbar connects with their arm with a dull, crunching thud, bending it into an impossible angle and drawing their attention back to him.

Their expression morphs slowly from rage into one of terror as they look at Ronin looming over them. The wolfish look of pure glee on his face as it starts to sink in that maybe they're not leaving here alive.

'Oh yeah? I'm a psycho? You haven't seen nothing yet.' Ronin cackles loudly, swinging the crowbar at the air between him and your ex and watching them flinch with amusement.

Your ex starts desperately calling your name, leaning around Ronin while clutching their broken arm and shouting, 'Hey, hey, sunshine! Go get help okay? You can't- you can't be okay with this. I know you better than-'

Ronin clocks them across the face with his fist and the blow is personal, designed to cause pain but not hurt them so badly that they can't listen to what's being said. He doesn't need to hit them with the crowbar to hurt them now because every movement pulls on their injured limbs and causes them to shriek and whimper in pain.

'Shut the fuck up.' Ronin sounds annoyed, the syllables drawn out like he can't believe they even tried that. 'You don't talk to him. You're dealing with me now.'

He laughs and the sound is disbelieving and bright, 'You don't get it yet, do you? He's here with me.' He gestures at you witht he crowbar. 'He chose this, he wants this. This isn't a coincidence, we brought you here today, together. Your death is premeditated. You're not at my mercy today, you're at his. I may be the sinful rot come to cleanse the land of your filth but he's the divinity that directed me to you.'

Your ex spits at Ronin and it lands on the toe of one of his shoes. 'You don't know them like I do-'

Ronin stamps his foot down on their hand and they cut themselves off with a blood curdling scream as the bones crunch underneath his boot.

'You don't know him at all.' All the humour has dropped off his face, instead there's this incensed fury on it. Ronin's eyes are wild and glaring as he grips them by the jaw and makes them look at him and only him.

'Here's how this is gonna go, okay? I'm going to fuck you up, and then you're going to apologise while I show you exactly how much he-' he points at you with his thumb over his shoulder, 'doesn't want you and if you behave I might consider not killing you. Might.'

Your ex laughs and opens his mouth to say something but Ronin is fed up of listening. He raises the crowbar above his head and brings it down on their torso and you hear the crack, smell the blood, see the fear starting to grip them fully now as Ronin raises the crowbar again.

Ronin's got blood on his face, splattered lightly across his mouth and cheek and though you're watching with baited breath through gaps in your fingers you can't help but feel your heart swell with love watching exactly how far Ronin would go for you- is going for you.

It should be a turn off. You should be running screaming for the hills at the gruesome sight in front of you but instead you're squirming in place, cock feeling heavy in your pants at the sight of him raining down blow after blow on your ex who has dragged themselves into the fetal position.

'Please! Please stop! Oh God, please, please-'

Ronin stops hitting him, pushes his hair out of his eyes, leaving a bloody red streak across his forehead in his fingers wake. He huffs out a breath and leans the crowbar across his shoulders. 'Wah, wah, please stop hitting me! I'm only a creepy fucking stalker that doesn't know the meaning of the words, "no" and "fuck off"!'

Your ex isn't looking at you or Ronin now, they're curled into a ball, shaking and clutching their broken limbs to themselves while praying out loud of all things. You can't help but stifle a giggle as you hear them start, 'Our Father who art thou in Heaven-'

'Oh now you ask for God? Always goes the same way with you sick fucks; all full of defiance with that fire in your eyes until you realise exactly how fucked you are and suddenly its all "don't hurt me, I'm so sorry please",' Ronin's waving his hands around dramatically as he speaks, amusement in his voice at this turn of events.

A little bit of you wonders if he's putting on a show for you as he circles around your ex and allows you a glimpse of the full extent of the damage, 'begging for God with your sinful fucking mouth like you're not already forsaken. Newflash asshole, God's not listening. If he was he wouldn't have put you in the lair of the devil in th' first fuckin' place. Dumbass.'

Your ex does not look good. They're covered in blood, both legs and an arm hanging limp at odd angles, and their breathing is a hard labouring wheeze. You know you should feel bad, that there should be something other than tingling glee running down your spine at the sight of them bloody and beaten because they crossed you. You get it now, why Ronin likes it so much.

Ronin looks up and catches sight of you staring at him nervously, like he might see your want and somehow deny it but that's positively deluded because this is Ronin, the butcher. He saw your want before you even knew you had it and he's brought you here to delight in it.

Ronin grins at you, all teeth and says, 'like what you see, darlin'?' You nod shyly behind your hands because what do you say to that, "Yes, I absolutely love it that you've beaten a person bloody for me?" Knowing Ronin he'd love that.

'C'mere, baby.' Ronin nods you over and you stumble to him on trembling legs. He catches you when you're close to him and sweeps you into a kiss. His hands are soaked with blood, sticky and warm. He tastes like metal when your tongue brushes against his.

You can hear your ex whimpering in horror somewhere below you and you can't help but laugh when Ronin pulls back slightly, saying, 'You hear that, darlin'? It's beautiful isn't it? They were so defiant before, so certain that you would save them, "Oh please, please save me. Sunshine, go get help!"'

Ronin breaks off into a exhuberant laugh, pressing his lips against the corner of your own, 'But what they didn't reckon with is that you're just as fucked up as me.'

Ronin's laugh sounds slightly deranged as he grabs you by the hips and flips you around so you're facing your ex and your back is pressed up against his front. He then slips one hand down the front of your pants, stopping just shy of where you want him, 'This turn you on, baby? You like the sight of death? The knowledge that I would kill for you?'

He noses down the side of your neck, voice breathy with want as your face floods with heat. You can't help but glance down at your ex all bruised and bleeding at your feet and the euphoria that floods you at the sight. The pure relief from knowing that they're not ever going to bother you again nearly knocks you off your feet.

You can't help the laugh that bubbles out of you, giddy and a little hysterical. Ronin chuckles, clicks his tongue from somewhere behind your ear and then he's leading you to brace your hands against the cool wall in front of you.

His hand slides down to cup your pussy, fingers slipping between your lips as he grinds the heel of it over the shaft of your cock, palm brushing over the head, back and forth. A laugh escapes him and puffs against the back of your neck when he feels how wet you are. 'Somebody's excited.'

'You- you guys are fucking fucke-'

'Shut the fuck up.' Ronin kicks them in their injured leg and the your ex cuts themselves off with a sharp scream that dissolves into a drawn out whimper.

You turn your head to try and catch a glance of Ronin, tilt it to try catch his lips with your own but before you manage it he smooths a hand up the back of your head and forcibly angles it to the ground so that you're looking at your ex.

'You're gonna miss the show, baby.' He nips at your ear. 'Don't you want to see me break him?' He dances his free hand up your side, you squirm at the feeling. You're breathing heavy, panting, hips rocking down into the heat and pressure of his hand wrapped over your cock. Your ex is whimpering on the ground now, like he's finally figured out that Ronin is evil incarnate and you're no better.

'I really don't care, I kinda just want you to make me cum, Nin.' You breathe.

Ronin laughs at this, startled and delighted, and nuzzles your face, 'After I painted such a pretty picture for you? Didn't know you were such a philistine.'

Ronin directs his next comment down at your ex, 'I want you to beg for forgiveness, while I take my baby here down to fucking hell on the joyride of his life.'

'Ronin. Don't embarrass meeee.'

'Please. You love it.' He snorts.

'Don't know what you're talking about.' You turn your nose up at him, pretending to be mad but your voice comes out far too breathy for anyone to believe you.

'Whatever will I do? How in sweet hell on Earth could I make it up to you? Maybe like this?'

Ronin's hand slides up, draggin his fingers through your pussy to wrap them over your cock, he strokes the shaft with his thumb and ring finger, the middle and index play with the head of your cock. When your hips are rocking into the motion he squeezes, pinching you gently to hear you gasp and moan.

'Ronin!' You gasp, and he makes a fond sound, pressing a kiss to your temple. You press your pussy into and then away from the feeling of him squeezing you, hips jerking. Ronin laughs breathlessly and resumes stroking your cock with regular pressure.

Your ex has started trying to shuffle away as discreetly as possible on the ground, mouth pressed into a thin line to stop them from screaming and crying out as they do.

'Keep watching baby,' Ronin guides your head back down with his hand on your neck, before he places his spiked boot on top of your ex's knee and presses, pinning him in place as he screams and cries incoherently.

'I think you're forgetting something~.' He directs at your ex in a singsong voice. 'Apologise.'

'I'm sorry! I'm sorry okay- I'm so- I'm so sorry, please just let me go. I promise I'll leave you alone, I won't ever bother you again.' Your ex starts sobbing in the middle of their sentence, big heaving breaths that rattle their ribcage and undoubtedly hurt but they can't seem to stop them.

Something about the sight is satifying. You're maybe a little heady off of the thrill and the power you feel at seeing someone that made you feel so small and out of control crying and broken beneath you, begging for your forgiveness.

Your cock pulses under Ronin's hand and you squirm where you're leaning back against Ronin's chest, press your cunt down into his hand. Ronin lets go of the back of your neck and places his arm across the front of your chest, just under your shoulders, pinning you against him.

''Nin, 'Nin, I love you,' you breath, turning your head to try look at him. Ronin's grinning, looking entirely too pleased with himself as he watches you delightedly.

'Baby, baby, what have I said about missing the show, c'mon.'

'Ronin, I don't fucking care, just fucking kiss me.' You pant.

He snickers and presses his mouth to yours while squeezing your cock again, bringing his thumb and ring finger together over the shaft while using his index and middle to pinch the head of your cock gently.

You more moan than yelp into his mouth as you're turned on enough that the slightly pain feels good and it's just enough sensation to blur your vision send a fizzing numb tingle across your skin that tips you into your orgasm.

Your lips go slack against Ronin's as you moan and your hips twitch upwards underneath his hand. Your cock pulses in pleasure, rhythmically contracting under his fingers, cunt clenching around nothing. Ronin presses kisses down the side of your neck, tightens his arm across your shoulders to hold you in place as your legs go lax.

Ronin starts talking but you can't make out what he's actually saying, you only hear the low hum of his barritone. You can barely hear how gleeful he sounds over your heartbeat thundering in your ears.

'Do you get it now? See how much he's not into you? You're dyin' at their feet and he'd still rather look at me. You're not even on his radar. You lost, 'nd it's time to make good on your bet.'

Ronin slips his hand out of your pants, holds it up in front of your face to show you exactly how wet you were while snickering before wrapping it tightly around your waist, holding you up as you blink blearily.

He lets go of your shoulders and readjusts so that he has the space to work as he raises his crowbar with his free hand, swings it down and firmly embeds it in your ex's skull just as they're raising their hands and blubbering something about how he can't and that they apologised.

It sinks in with a satisfying thud and he pulls it out again with a wet thunk. Your ex sinks sideways on the ground, body going limp as the life slips from his eyes and you've never seen a sight so intriguing, so fascinating. You kind of want to see it again…

'How was that, darlin'? You feel better now?'

You look up at Ronin, speechless. What do you say to him after that? 'Yes Ronin, turns out I'm a freak and I absolutely loved that, we should do it again soon, I want to see more. Will you teach me?'

A slow grin spreads across Ronin's face as you realise with dawning embarrassment that you might have said some or all of that out loud. He laughs, exhuberant and presses his sticky, wet, bloody hands to your cheeks to kiss you.

'Knew was a reason I love you, darlin'.' He says.

'What, like you didn't before?' You murmur.

'Nah, 'course I did, saw it in you from the minute you decided to stay in hell for the "experience".' He laughs, but then his voice settles and turns serious, almost sweet. 'From the way you first looked at me, then again after knowing who I was when you chose to stay and find out more. Could see it in your eyes. You're a hybristophiliac darlin'.'

'Ronin! I am not.' You're affronted at the idea but Ronin just levels you with a pointed look.

'…Okay, well, maybe for you.' You concede.

Ronin snorts, 'Keep tellin' yourself that, darlin'. Now, let's get out of here.' He wraps his arm around your shoulder and starts strutting towards the entrance of purgatory.

''Nin, we can't. What if someone sees us? We're covered in blood.' You whisper like you're afraid the fictional someone is in the alley with you.

Ronin barks out a laugh, 'Don't worry about it, darlin'. Didn't you know this is the butcher's territory? People are far too afraid of running into him to walk around here this late. Besides, even if they do, nothing a little slaughterin' won't fix.'

He fixes you with a knowing grin, and even though you know you shouldn't, that you should be more afraid or worried, you follow him blindly into the night with glee on your face and mirth in your heart.

♡♡♡