#crocfoxx

AHSHBSBhzhsnsbzbhshs Lily dearest mutual you are going to be the death of me with Hetalia (affectionate, I’ll put it at the bottom shhshshshs)

Ask game link for the world to see

But oooooo Crocodile and ships involving himmm hehehhe~

So, I’ma start out real loud and aggressive for a minute, but I DESPISE Crocodile x Buggy as a ship. It makes me SO irrationally jealous and aggressive I want to shred that clown like a chew toy. Though of course no hate to those that do ship it, and Buggy is… fine…. By himself. I dislike him still because of the ship, however I am fond of Shuggy. So, buggy by himself gets a pass. His situation and luck is also quite funny, so I wont kill him off in my self insert universe. yet. He’s just- EVERYWHERE. A lot of times I will try to look up crocodile x reader fics (cause im that desperate for content and eventually just started writing my own lol) and THERE ARE A LOT that involve buggy in some way. I’ve even tried going to my good ol backup ship that i self insert on for selfship reading material, BUT BUGGY IS IN THAT TOO!! he’s sooooooo prominently shipped with Crocodile that its hard to find Crocodile posts that dont involve buggy in some way. But like, I’ve never really had any SUPER violent NOTPs before (that I can remember) so my aggression towards buggy is a bit out of left field but i am KICKING THAT CLOWN SO HARD IT MAKES A FIELD GOAL OR WHATEVER SPORTS THING I DONT KNOW SPORTS. Mauling him, and not in a sexy way.

Weirdly enough however, I don’t mind Crocodile x Mihawk. I like it quite a bit actually! Perhaps its because i semi selfship with mihawk. (Its…. Idk how to label me and Mihawk’s relationship tbh its like, I like him, but not extremely high up there selfship feelings, y’know? Possibly just visual attraction idk. The vibes.) I usually try to look for CrocHawk fics when I cant find any new x readers (and usually get bombarded with buggy being involved or there being no new content of them either.)

Such a tragic boat im in…..

Theres also Doflamingo x Crocodile, which I love to ship as part of the canon of my self insert story that Crocodile and Doflamingo were MARRIED at one point, and then had a REALLY rough divorce that Doflamingo still calls “going through a rough patch.” They’re horrible for each other but I love seeing art of them being toxic exes, theres so much drama to it im obsessed!!!!!!

Then there’s Crocodile x sanji, which is SUCH a sneaky rarepair considering they exchanged at most a few lines with each other over the snailphone and thats literally it, but they’re both smokers and the TENSION they had when they were on the line, being super spy enemies with each other was GOLDEN i do love crocsan, plus the size difference HITS so hard. Another one of those ships where I self insert onto sanji with, I need a sugar daddy situation going on there.

Crocodile x smoker is another one I like from a distance, not super strong feelings about it other than i’d like to be sandwiched between their pecs please.

And finally, a teeny rarepair kinda one off idea I have is Crocodile x Ace, mostly cause I kin Ace very strongly, and since they were both in Alabasta at the same time (though they never interacted on screen) i could see them having a hot dynamic of sassy youngster/enthralled old man idk, but thats basically what my current selfship dynamic is, but then again, I kin Ace, so it makes sense.

Anyways the moment you’ve been waiting for….

Gilbert.

(Posting under a cut cause this will be too long otherwise)

Thinking specifically about body headcanons that I have for Crocodile tonight…

Like, for one I feel he’s super hairy, but not like- fluffy hairy. His body hairs are pretty thin in his age and he has them mostly on his arms and legs, with a relatively thin happy trail that curves around his belly and a soft little bush, but he shaves his facial hair pretty neatly. He’s also got hair on his chest, but its just a thin coating, but hes got SO MUCH on his arms and ankles and inner thighs.

Another thing is his arm nub, I think when it was amputated, it was mostly just his hand but his ulna and radius got shattered by the impact so it was better to remove the bone shards and amputate a little higher, leaving kind of a folded “flesh pocket” that dangles underneath his elbow and is held in place by the sock of his prosthetic, and is the main reason he has a hook since its easier to maneuver with the limited muscle he has on the lower part of his arm rather than attenpt the convolutedness of a articulated hand, especially considering his DF powers. And speaking of! I think that with some of the finer hook movements, he uses small trails of sand to turn it and thats part of why the base is so bulbous, is so he can have sort of mini sandstorms articulating more complicated movements and he kind of just does it second nature now.

I also headcabon he had his phalloplasty done before he lost his arm and they used flesh from that hand to actually form his shaft and so thats why he doesnt have any visible scars of the phalloplasty skin graft cause it was taken from him in the fight.

I mean, that also brings up my obvious trans headcanon for him and he has top surgery scars and they look like the scar on his face mostly just cause i like that scar design and think it would be cool if they matched, but i can also see him with regular top surgery scars too and oh man he still has HUGE pecs and they’re very kissable along with the rest of his pudgy body.

I think most of the plumpness of him is definitely muscle, but his thighs hold the most fat since he tends to like using his sand to get him long distances over actually walking, so i think his thighs are more fat distribution than muscle, and of course hes got plenty of fat around his muscle too, though he still keeps a pretty square appearance. I love art of him with a bit of a gut and a dad bod, he just looks wrong when he’s got a bunch of abs.

I also think he runs very warm, like sun baked sand or sunning rocks~ like a comforting kinda warm. Soft, and gentle like a weighted blanket thrown in the drier.

I love him your honor.

Omg I completely forgot that with a new blog means a new opportunity for shameless self promotion!!! But if you’re looking for some lore for me and one of my mains; Sir Crocodile, then look no further than this amazing fic of mine!~

Its 81k words (14 chapters) and set at least 2 years pre-canon and act 1 ends relatively stand alone so no need to worry about huge cliffhangers while I’m on a hiatus from One Piece with my Hazbin hyperfication surge :3

I gotta be CUDDLED and wraped up in a giant coat and held on a big man’s lap like a cute little pet.

I’ve got a candle going rn thats like- i cant even describe the scent as anything except rich man smell like it smells like a good fucking cologne. Its mahogany and teakwood and SOOO FUCKING GOOD like its a really strong and intense smell but its not sweet or butter its just GOOD AND MASCULINE AND idk what that even means but it smells like Sir Crocodile so we’re cuddling

I’m like LITERALLY half his size since hes so big but all the more to envelop me in the biggest hug.

Him kissing the back of my head so softly while he does paperwork or hearing that voice rumble low praises and compliments to me…