#coping by learning

It is no surprise I suck at being mature during appropriate times, but when it matters I like to think I show up pretty dapper. I woke up today and cleaned my room. I had a heart to heart with my youngest sister. I told my dad he was tripping for projecting. I even unblocked my former lover (lmao I have spouts of pettiness). I’m sure another thing will pop up, but i’m confident this too shall pass. I’m not always confident about what God wants from me, but I’m willing to find out. I may not be as obedient, but I do want to have more than good intentions. This year has been filled with redefining steps to a better me. I’m learning to speak life, truth, and love to myself and others. I’m learning to set boundaries and recognize my worth. I’ve opened all of myself to others who care most about me. I am blessed. I thought I lost everything and was starting backwards, but I’m starting to see my present life as a hidden blessing. I’m sure i’m gonna be pretty devastated when my former lover finds a new beautiful and amazing partner, but I know life will continue and I will find my own. I understand now that me starting my life back with family is me being able to redo things in a better way. I don’t want to live in the past if I can’t learn from it and move on. So it’s time to learn from it and move on. I’m not sure if anyone will ever read this, but if you happen to do so here are 3 things I want to leave you with.

1) Don’t let your mind ruin your ability to choose matters of the heart. I’m learning that there is no ruler over the heart, mind, and soul. They work together and share significance. When you can recognize what needs to be utilized make sure you check-in mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. 

2)Permit yourself to learn all your options and then choose. I kept feeling like I was limited, before actually checking to see if I really was. You cut yourself out the game of life when you fail to be informed. Know your options so you can play skillfully and responsibly. Activate your choosing power by informing yourself of the options you have to play with. 

3)Remember you build your support team when you utilize it. Don’t abuse them. Don’t Neglect them. Be honest with them and make sure you pick your problems correctly. I’m learning to understand their role in my life, and I’m taking those lessons to my position as a support team member for others. 

Bonus- Learn when to isolate yourself and when to be around others. Both are needed. You can’t live this life alone, but you can take alone time. You are permitted.