#commandys asks

Erwin glanced up towards the door, setting down the pen in his hand. “Ah Hange, please come in,” A smile creased his lips as he spoke, and he rested his head in the palm of his hand. ”You’re much to kind to me.” 

Erwin’s brows furrowed, eyes taunt towards the small-framed girl before him. Her question fazed through him for a moment, as he silently mouthed the word “eyebrows?” in a silent question, searching for validation. 

He blinked, obviously believing she was delusional. 

Glancing up to meet grey eyes then shifting back down, Erwin payed no heed to the dark haired man across his desk. He busily scrawled across the document before him, disregarding the rather obnoxiously placed Corporal fishing for attention. “Was there something you needed, Levi? I’m very busy.” 

Erwin blinks, a stunned silence and muddled confusion twisting the features on his face. 

"Kirschtein, just what—?" He pauses, musing over the soldier’s face, trying to collect his thoughts. 

"You can’t be santa clause."

Shit. 

He’d fucked up. 

Or, for better terminology, was still fucking up—the very sight of the small boy, caused him to divert his eyes. He couldn’t even look at him without getting flustered. He rang his hands together, silently twiddling them between one another. 

If he was in the right state of mind, he would have said reassuring words—No, this wasn’t what I want at all, something is wrong, please Marco, understand this—but instead, all he managed to get out was half of a chocked sob. 

Erwin blinked, settling into his chair, his brow furrowing at the question. 

"The most terrifying thing—?" He paused, frowning, resting his head in the palm of his hand. 

"As my time as commander, there has been countless times where I have experienced fear. It’s part of the job, mostly—" Erwin laughed, a small, forced chuckle. 

"It is also part of the job to set aside innate human responses that could influence my decisions. What one person may consider terrifying, I’ve adapted—I’ve learned to set aside fear for the sake of humanity." 

He paused again, head crooning to the side as a dull memory pressed into his mind. 

"I suppose though, if we’re talking specifics, there was a time when I was a young soldier; not yet worth anything to any Corps—I was traveling through wall Sina to deliver some things to the MP." 

Erwin waved his hand dismissively, as if the idea was nothing more then humorous. “A very long and winded tale later, I was grabbed by some men who didn’t quite agree with Survey Corps ideals,” He laughed, short and gruff. “I have some nice looking scars on my waist as a result.”

He paused again, eyes shining bright in careful study of his thoughts. “I’m not afraid of titans, no—I’m more afraid of people. Their ferocity, their anger—it is terrifying, in retrospect. Titans only understand one thing—to consume everything—while a human mind experiences the powerful notion that is fear.” 

"Marco, are you alright—" Erwin paused, glancing down at the youth before him. He blinked, head cocked curiously as he watched him speak. 

Dull thoughts pressed in his mind as he took in the words. Did Marco always look so cute? Did he always have a tiny gleam in his eyes? Erwin felt his cheeks redden, and he glanced away from the small, freckled soldier. 

"M-Marco—" he stammered. Shit, why couldn’t he keep his composure? He’d spoken to him on several occasions without any sort of pitting fear in his chest, and Erwin wasn’t one to mince words.