#closing thought

(Lol this is long, I kinda went off once I started) 

Assessing oneself is a difficult task. Because you are writing about yourself, it can be difficult to be honest and not avoid the little things you know you have done wrong. This quarter, I believe that I did a good job of keeping up with due dates and organization. I have always been a person to get things done early and get them out of the way. A Sunday due date is usually turned in by Friday afternoon. Within this course, I completed all of the assignments in a timely fashion even if I may have fell a couple tweets behind during midterms. Overall, I feel like the effort I put in this class is reflected in my posted work. 

And to be honest, I think a big reason that I was so engaged in this class and the material of it was because we were not graded on each assignment. For most of high school, I had always enjoyed learning. But once I started taking AP classes and got into college, I became more stressed than I had ever been about a number. Through the readings about reflection and different teaching styles, I think I realized that I had lost my love of learning during the past few years. In addition, reflecting on academic teaching and learning styles helped me finally change my major, something that I had been struggling to decide about since last winter. Not having grades for every assignment made me feel like I could actually breathe while trying to learn. If you are constantly suffocated with the idea of being assessed on everything, it feels like there is no more room for learning. Instead of asking questions and freely being curious about things, the pressure of grades limits you to trying to memorize what you need to know and nothing else. For that reason, among many, I loved this class and everything about it. 

I believe that there is always more to practice when it comes to writing skills. Especially within research. I have no doubts that I could have done a better job narrowing down my research topic or laying out my paper. I think when it comes to research, I have learned that although primary research is less scary than it seems, that does not mean it is trivial, simple, or easy. When drafting my research paper, I realized where I went wrong in the research process, both primary and secondary. I should have made my topic more clear so that I could draw more direct connections between my primary and secondary research. 

Back to the idea of assessment, writing is more than a grade because it acts as a microcosm for all other learning. In writing, it is important to practice and reflect, build upon other ideas, and be patient with the process. In my opinion, learning in our society does not incorporate these soft skills into academia as much as we should. Memorization and speed and random facts and consistency and perfection are far more stressed than reflection or process. Taking this class has only highlighted this idea for me and it came at the right time. Spring quarter last year was brutal. By the end of it, I hated learning. But I didn't hate the material of my courses. I hated constantly worrying about every grade I got. Instead of actually learning things, I did some primary research, *haha*, and figured out what I needed to know in order to put on the illusion that I knew what the eff was going on. The first day of this class gave me hope for the process of learning again. And I think that is why I believe that I did well in this course. Beyond turning things in on time, I got to use my love of writing and be free. I didn't have to think about grades and therefore was able to slow my breath down enough to have a conversation with the ideas we discussed over the quarter. 

I have learned how to apply this idea from writing to other courses. Unfortunately, merciless grading still exists in other courses. But from this class I have learned how to effectively reflect and I hope that this will allow me to approach these different subjects with a more open mind to the big picture. 

RATE MY STUDENT :)

Overall Quality: 4.5

Level of Effort / Commitment : 4.5

Characteristics: Organized, Proactive, Curious

Summary: As a student in this class, I believe I was an overall good student, a couple off days and texting in class instances here and there. But, because I really enjoyed this course, I gave myself a high rating of commitment. I believe I was well organized and was curious about the things my classmates had to say during discussions and did my best to be a positive influence and presence within the classroom and on Twitter. 

gems for tonight:

- If trip was here... - every single skye x fitz scene, like actually. the girl needed hugs and THE MAN STEPPED UP TO THE PLATE. - coulson and may's fake death - jemma's revelations - "c'mon girl"

and my personal favorite

- "Baby got Bakshi"

So I finished Tales of Xillia at about 80 hours, lvl 73-78 (Jude -> Eliza was highest). [52minutes to beat the final boss ///////] I will say that I thought it was probably one of the least entertaining of the Tales of games I have played (Phantasia, Eternia, Symphonia, Symphonia 2, Graces F, Abyss). I felt really limited and constrained by the cast make up (Essentially just played as Jude, Leia, Milla, and Elize). No way to have an all male team made it feel dull. Rowan was way too old to be in a game. The attachments made things interesting though (Eliza just too cool for school in the black shades, Jude in his swimming shorts was hot, Alvin with the sidekick mask was rather cool, hope these things make it for successive games.

For Plot

So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past. –F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby (1925)

I think part of him was afraid and rest of him in conflict with that fear.

You see, he didn’t quite know what to expect from…