#classy life

Still not over this wedding. Pure class 🕊️💍

for some reason, the desire to become more ladylike is demonised in our society. it is apparently controversial to have the opinion that getting dressed to go outside and saying ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ should be common place. however, if you do want to be an elegant person and float around with grace and poise, here are some necessary mindset shifts that I have learnt over my life pursuing ‘ladylike’. 🎀

beauty & knowing your value

cherish yourself, ignore advertising. so much in this world wants to put you down and tell you that everything is “wrong” with you to sell you junk. as a lady, you must know that you are precious, you are beautiful and you have intrinsic value just being you. truly knowing your own worth will allow you to avoid these degrading messages and let your own radiance shine outwards.

treat yourself like a treasure. do you believe a human-shaped diamond belongs in the Louvre or in a dumpster? you are a precious gem so shift your mindset and treat yourself accordingly. feed yourself good food, look after your health and body, fill your mind with beauty and culture. you are a lady worthy of an art gallery and so you are worth looking after!

get dressed everyday. if you seek confidence, you should value your appearance, because it dictates how you feel about yourself and how you show up in your life. it sounds counter-intuitive, but this is a genuine secret that all ladylike women know. you need to put effort into yourself to feel confident and beautiful. dress up every day for a single week and it will change your life - that’s how fast you realise the secret to confidence is effort in appearance.

perfection in beauty doesn’t exist. in our society, we place the concept of perfection on a pedestal. women are highly sensitive to this. we insinuate that if you do not have the perfect face or perfect body then you are ugly and worthless so why bother. but what is perfect? Audrey and Marilyn are both memorialized for their femininity and beauty but they are such different women, so which one is the perfect one?? it’s a fallacy. we memorialize them because they embody themselves so truthfully that it is charming. perfection is a just matter of taste. you have permission to be beautiful and glamorous in your own way for your own tastes.

mannerisms & behaviour

good manners always. be peaceful in public, hold the door open, say please. it makes society more harmonious and since manners are apparently absent in the post-pandemic era, you instantly become memorable for being a considerate person. if you were never taught good manners, then it’s not your fault! but there is no time better to learn than now. i can write a gentle guide to manners if you wish.

treat every single person you meet with kindness and respect. every server, every cashier and every driver deserves the utmost respect and your best behaviour regardless of your mood. the generosity and kindness of Princess Diana to everyone she met is why she was such a beloved royal.

if people offend you, then leave them alone. when people are rude to you or intentionally hurt you with their behaviours or words, then practice self respect and don’t bother with them again. don’t argue, don’t fight. it’s literally not worth the energy to struggle against people who do not care about you. your life is too short and precious to waste time allowing your heart to be broken again and again by them same people.

i could probably write a book on everything I have learnt about becoming a lady. there is honestly so much to say on the topic, but very little of it is ever discussed anymore. hopefully this very little is still helpful to anyone out there wishing to be her own lady. 🎀