#cinderlynx

❛ You don't have to look so suspicious about seeing me here without Shorter. ❜ It certainly represents a shift from their ordinary meetups, held mostly as a somewhat legal means of two best friends to regularly check in on each other outside of the watchful gaze of a sterner shepherd, but today Tobias finds himself strolling alone down the streets of Myogadani while their mutual friend remains woefully hard at work, and he can admit it must seem rather unlikely that his walk 'round these parts just-so-happens to come to a halt in the one restaurant the blonde can near invariably be found at, on an occasion when Tobias could technically be anywhere else.

' i'm not gonna do something like that !! ' obviously !!

Send ❓  and my muse will answer all questions honestly.

@cinderlynx asked: ❓ tobias ^_^

Does my muse trust yours?

❛ Heh. ❜ The huff indicates amusement at the odd circumstance he's found himself in, and although Tobias briefly contemplates offering half-answers as he typically does... for these questions regarding Ash, the genius figures he might as well be entirely honest. It's not as if anyone can take advantage of these fun facts, not when he's already been visibly violence-happy with anyone who so much as looked in Ash's general direction for a smidgen too long. What would they do with this newfound knowledge? Try him? ❛ I do, shockingly enough. Didn't think I'd live to see the day. ❜

Does my muse dislike yours?

With a calm tone and an almost sympathetic gaze, Tobias softly utters his response without breaking eye contact. ❛ Are my eyes bright purple? ❜ It's a mocking inquiry in broad daylight, and he makes sure to point that out, lest the sarcasm flies over the other's head. ❛ That's how stupid this question sounds to me. Your question has the same answer as mine, by the way. ❜

Would my muse kill someone for yours?

❛ Would I? Take a wild guess. ❜ He already does, some of which Ash is aware of, and a greater number of which Tobias goes out of his way to keep under the wraps. Not due to their identities so much as because Ash's compassionate heart is bound to start counting them eventually, and inevitably end up feeling guilty over the piles upon piles of corpses killed for his safety and happiness. Why cause such a hassle for their future, when Tobias can deal with these wastes of space without having to ever involve Ash in it? Ignorance is bliss, as they say, and the brunette intends to keep it that way. ❛ I'll kill every living being on this planet and beyond if I have to. What's the world to me compared to Ash, anyway? It can burn down for all I care. As long as he's fine, I don't give a rat's ass about what happens to anyone else. ❜

Would my muse kill your muse?

❛ ... ❜ The question leaves a sour taste in Tobias' mouth, and the dragged out silence does nothing to alleviate the tension in the air. He doesn't enjoy wasting his time thinking about this subject, and prefers to avoid having to. ❛ I don't plan to, that's for sure. But I don't take kindly to betrayals, so here's to hoping Ash won't do anything to betray my trust and force my hand. ❜ That's the only scenario in which he can imagine potentially killing Ash, but he's cognizant of the fact that the gang leader wouldn't betray him in the regular sense of the word, or there would be far less trust involved in their relationship from Tobias' end of the deal. Still, who's to say that Ash won't one day choose someone else over him, as that blunder too would lamentably be counted as a betrayal in the mafioso's eyes?

Would my muse save yours?

❛ Duh? ❜ The condescending nature of the noise escapes by accident, but it flawlessly explains Tobias' personal thoughts on the matter, as well as his opinion on the level of intelligence of the person asking it. ❛ I guess contextual clues are a bit hard for you to grasp, so let me put it this way: If Ash is with me, all is good. If someone tries to take Ash away from me, it becomes a problem. Temporarily for me, permanently for them. You'll find I'm pretty creative when it comes to getting rid of people who want to lay a finger on him, and I feel especially inspired when I come across those who try to act on that idea too. ❜ It goes without saying that he would intervene in any other life-threatening scenario as well, but Tobias heavily doubts his fellow genius would find himself in any such situation without someone plotting to get him there.

Does my muse find your muse attractive?

❛ Sure I do. ❜ Only he knows how hard he's had to research this topic to be able to answer as effortlessly as he is now, however. ❛ He's a real special guy, y'see. Usually when I'm attracted to people it's either because of their looks or their smarts, but in Ash's case it's hard to figure out what I'm not attracted to. If I hadn't personally met this guy, I don't think I would've believed someone as up my alley as him even exists. ❜

Is my muse disgusted by yours?

❛ N~o~p~e. ❜ And if his childish response is an indication, the question weights about as much relevance to the mafioso as a child's inquiry would. ❛ What's there to be disgusted about? ❜ A veiled threat towards the nosy stranger rests behind his seemingly flippant query, alongside a fleeting yet fiery glare that warns against unwise comments: Be careful about what you say next, or your body will become one tongue lighter.

Would my muse go on a date with your muse?

A chuckle of cartoonish desperation precedes the genius' reply, and it alone amounts to far more words than Tobias could ever hope to utter in a timely manner. This dramatic teenager. ❛ I mean, I would, and technically we could say we've been on a few, but sadly Ash's head is stuck too high up his own ass to notice that, so poor little me is banished to the amical hangouts realm for the foreseeable future. Light a candle for me next time you go to church, won't you? ❜

Would my muse kiss yours?

❛ Definitely, but I'm not going to. I've worked so hard to earn his trust, I'd be the dumbest man alive to make all of that effort go to waste. ❜ Now or ever, really. With anyone in Ash's position, it's best to take all of the possible precautions before doing something that could imply crossing a boundary, and although his friend has become touchy-feely with him as of late, there is no world in which Tobias would equate that sort of physical affection with consent for a kiss. The former can be cordial, while the latter can only be romantic or exploitative; and the brunette isn't too keen on testing out which of the two Ash would consider his kiss to be, not when their entire current relationship hinges on Ash's trust that Tobias is not made of the same ilk as the grand majority are. ❛ If Ash ends up wanting to kiss me, that's another story. But I'm a patient guy, so even if we do eventually reach that point, it'll be him who'll have to initiate the first kiss, not me. ❜ Though he might test the waters by waddling a tad further into Ash's personal space and flirting as he's been, that's about as far as Tobias is willing to go without his friend's explicit permission. He can live without the hypothetical kisses, but he doesn't want to live without Ash.

Would my muse betray yours?

The teen painstakingly refrains from making an unsavory remark about his interviewer's mental capacities (it's always the run-ins with ordinary people that frustrate him, whatwith the room temperature intelligence suddenly put into the equation), but Tobias succeeds in finding a nicer answer, one that would be socially acceptable to offer to anyone below the age of four. ❛ No. You can assume anything that'd make Ash's trust in me dissipate is something I'd never do. Want me to write that down for you, too? Let me know if there's any word you don't understand. ❜

My muse’s favorite thing about yours is____

Hard to say when Ash is the human amalgamation of all of Tobias' favorite traits inconceivably meshed into a single person, but he supposes the first thing that drew him to the blonde should be accurate enough for this occasion. ❛ He's the funniest guy I've ever met, and if you know me, you know that being entertaining is the one trait I appreciate the most in people. ❜ That, as well as the fact that entertainment derived from Ash requires neither the other teen's conscious effort, nor a lack of Tobias' self-preservation. There is no need to account for threats to his own life during their time alone together, nor for ways to keep the exciting times going as he ought to do with everyone else. With Ash, life is easy. With Ash, life is fun. With Ash, life is worth living.

The thing my muse dislikes about yours is____

It's hard to rein in the urge to roll his eyes at the one quirk that regularly tests his patience, and it doesn't take long for the pathway to a rant to form. ❛ That dumbass is too kind to others. I wouldn't be surprised if I turned around for five seconds and by the time I looked back Ash would be bleeding on the ground after protecting some "innocent passerby" that got caught in a crossfire. I wouldn't put it past him to spare an asshole and get stabbed in the back by the same guy two days later, either. This idiot's "benevolent" heart is going to get him killed the second I let my guard down, and somehow he still thinks he's in the right about it. Delusional and stupid, I've really struck gold here. ❜ Made all the worse by Tobias' sheer inability to comprehend his friend's absurdity. He's never felt compelled to be altruistic nor merciful to any capacity, and watching the blonde be as persistent about being exactly that day in and day out is likely akin to Ash's failed perceptions about the brunette's suicidal actions. At least, Tobias figures, he receives an adrenaline and dopamine rush in return for his near-death undertakings. What does Ash receive in return for his? ❛ And imagine he has the gall to think I'm the reckless one, too. Maybe I should gift him a room full of reflective glass for his next birthday. It'd be his first time looking in a mirror. ❜

@cinderlynx asked: ❝    jesus christ ,   what are you ?    five ?   i called you little miss months ago ,  you hag .   get the hell over it .   ❞

“ Please, I’m not that petty, ”     Ilsa states, adjusting the strap of her sundress before settling down on her chaise lounge beneath the shade of an umbrella,     “ but it's a little suspicious that you don’t seem to remember using me as an expensive armrest at the time. ”     Pulling a rose-shaped compact off the nearby side table, she opens it to ensure her eyeliner hasn’t smudged and that her lashes are still in place – he had nearly dragged her into the pool alongside him, after all. Satisfied with her findings, she snaps the compact closed.     “ Besides, it’s a hot day and teenagers smell absolutely disgusting, I was only trying to help. ”     A smile is offered as she delicately takes a drink from the tray held by her bodyguard.     “ No reason to look so upset, would you like a towel? A mimosa maybe? ”

Unprompted.

@cinderlynx asked: ❝ . . . bastard . ❞ the blonde breaks his silent , contemplative stewing with a hiss , doing little to conceal the visual traces of frustration that had formed in his expression from his companion , who certainly would have picked up on it regardless . little shit’s too observant for his own good , ash knew it well . ❝ it’s already may . whatddya’ want ? ❞ he’s sure tobias will gather that he’s referring to his rapidly approaching birthday without it being mentioned by name , so he wastes no time before rushing to intercept the next possible retort that might be headed his way in response . ❝ ‘ you ’ ain’t an answer . don’t even start , sweetheart . I mean , you keep gettin’ older like this n’ y’er gonna need me to help ya’ walk . way to keep that base indefinitely covered , genius . ❞ while doing his very best to avoid thinking about the last time he asked tobias what he wanted , albeit in a very different , non - birthday related context , he rolls his eyes . ❝ c’mon , hit me . ain’t exactly at a loss , but I’m still feelin’ like i’m shoppin’ for beyonce , man . ❞ / 4 tobias obvi . sorry i was held at gunpoint to send this . . . bro anything but the stuff we already owe 💀 🙏 😭

No sooner does the familiar insult leave the blonde's lips that Tobias' head swivels 'round to assess the situation, abandoning the phone in his hand as well as the recipients inside it without bothering even once to debate the upsides or downsides of doing so. After all, it's an established fact that Ash will always take precedence over everything else, whether the thing discarded in favor of paying attention to the blonde is a minor grocery list or the salvation of the world. By now it has become a matter partly of special consideration and partly of long-term habit to engage instantaneously with an affront as soon as it's Ash that's uttering it, and it makes little difference to the mafioso whether the insult is aimed at himself or at somebody else when ultimately the point is that something has irritated the gang leader enough for him to deign it worthwhile to grow vocal about it, and that there should be nothing allowed to vex Ash beyond Tobias' own carefully calculated moments of light mischief.

Jades nearly burn a hole into the side of his face at present however, indirectly declaring that it is his fault (whatever this "it" might entail) and for a fleeting moment Tobias does naught but stare back in cautious silence, mind promptly sent into overdrive in an attempt to figure out what he might have done to warrant Ash's courteous convoking this time around when there had been no intention of rattling him. Fortunately, a blink swiftly displays the disruption of Tobias' racing thoughts once the month of May is brought into discussion and the pieces behind the blonde's irritation suddenly fall into place, successfully triggering a snort of incredulity and hilarity alike. Hadn't Tobias made it obvious ages prior that a pebble off the side of the road would be more than enough to suffice for his birthday, as long as it's his dumbass who's granting it to him? Why bother with finding something more for one who can independently obtain whatever it is that he might desire, and when the mafioso is already cognizant of the "thought that matters" and of his fellow genius' fondness of him, no less? Leave it to Ash to devise fresh new ways of stressing himself out over matters of needless sentimentality regardless. New York's finest is certainly the only person on this hell-bound earth who's ever going to willingly take these great pains for him, a truth Tobias is unreservedly convinced of.

The corners of his mouth twitch in amusement at the instantaneous callback, a delightful confirmation that his earlier confession of sorts represents a subject Ash has evidently given plenty of thought towards (although most likely against his will) if it continues to plague his mind to this day (as it should, the brunette idly muses). ❝ So what I'm hearing is that you've decided you'll stay with me 'til we'll die of old age? ❞ One brow lifts in playful banter, and Tobias finds that he cannot refrain from teasing his dearest friend just a smidgen more (a worthwhile endeavor even if it shall result in a smack over the head). ❝ Wow.~ What am I supposed to ask for now, when you've basically told me I already have everything I'll ever want? ❞ A peculiarity that is conjoined jest and candor, prompting the mafioso to briefly wonder how this remark might be taken (will Ash think of this comment forevermore as well? or will he simply disregard it as today's rile of choice? It makes no difference, but still entertains aplenty.)

Amusing as the joshing might be though, the question does put a hamper on Tobias' ability to respond. For once, a few seconds are visibly spent thinking of a satisfying answer, and yet none measure up to what Ash presumably expects of him. Does he want something? If he did, it would have long been in his possession. Since he doesn't, there is currently nothing to wish for. What an ironic time to wind up in a catch-22. Perhaps Ash's joking remark is flawlessly on the nose, or maybe Beyonce could in fact outdo Tobias in the creation of a birthday wishlist. ❝ I don't really care about anything else, but if you're hellbent on getting me a gift anyway... ❞ With nothing to need nor much to want, what should he ask for? It's one thing to demand absurdity from those looking to land themselves into his good graces; another entirely to tell Ash to find something for him (it is of no consequence if the rest die trying, but he would prefer his idiot not to burn himself out; something he's fairly sure is nonetheless bound to happen as soon as he'll open his mouth again).

Something he might enjoy, which should likewise prove relatively easy to acquire for someone in Ash's position... ❝ How about you find us something to match? ❞ There is no need to specify what, when it would only force Ash into a quest of redundancy. Whatever he might choose in the end, Tobias is confident he'll be satisfied with it. Yet even so, there is one addendum worth adding to the implicit clause. ❝ Careful with what you pick, though, 'cause I'm not gonna let you stash your half away in some forgotten drawer, m'kay? ♡ ❞