#chplot

the department has been investigating the murder of hope upton for weeks and solved the case. the victim moved to cape hazel from their parents’ home in cape sienna in late july. in early september, they began intermittently depositing large sums of money in various bank accounts, and chpd later discovered the victim stole the money from the city of cape hazel’s special funds allocated to rebuild the diner. since the funds were stolen, chpd and the city have, in conjunction, been investigating that disappearance.

it seems that former mayor zeff’s recent spouse, mayor tanny of cape sienna, discovered before chpd that the victim looted the funds. because he was the anonymous donor who gifted $1 million to rebuild the diner, he was very upset and decided to take matters into his own hands. on october 1, 2019, tanny tevito murdered hope upton by the lighthouse. it is believed that former mayor zeff may have assisted in the cover-up following the murder. tanny and zeff have been taken into custody and will be tried accordingly.

thank you to the citizens of cape hazel for your patience and cooperation throughout the investigation.

it’s 7:41 am, and a crowd has formed around the yellow police tape barrier.  nobody is speaking, uncharacteristic of the town, but the news has cut through everybody’s hearts. a body was found on the shore by the lighthouse, and someone overheard a police officer say it was hope upton’s. oh, who could have ever done this? even i, the omniscient narrator, am far too shaken to continue.

“oh my goodness, what is that?”

“it’s a fire! is that around the clock?!”

“chris, i’m calling the police!”

attention, cape hazeliens, this is your mayor speaking. our beloved diner, around the clock, has been burnt down. as atrocious as the interior design was and as abysmal as the food was, this place was home to many of our beautiful townspeople. authorities are currently looking into the cause of the travesty, so everybody is currently unsure of the situation, including your desolate mayor. this is truly so devastating, so if any of you know any details, please send your tips to the police and my blog. i am personally helping the authorities with the investigation. for those of you who have been financially impacted by the fire, the mayor’s office will try and assist you with your situation. i am deeply disturbed by this event, and i hope i can help ease the woes and pains of my precious town. do be careful around the area, and be careful with your hearts.

thank you, cape hazel. and thank you, around the clock.

uh oh! it looks like twin brothers dominic and finn larry took advantage of mayor zeff’s honeymoon to hack into his blog (x). watch out for trouble this week!

breaking news! a town crier reported to the campsite that she saw zeff carried away by a band of raccoons. the cape hazeliens are now at odds about whether or not to save zeff. what will your muse do?

breaking news! the daughter of mayor zeff goldblum, who has been missing for 11 days, has been found. the 26-year-old woman, sasha goldblum, was discovered returning to her town home on yorkside to collect an item. police staking out the home apprehended goldblum and discovered that she faked her own kidnapping and has been hiding in a neighboring town for almost two weeks. furthermore, the police suspect miss goldblum is responsible for a slew of ransom notes delivered to citizens all throughout town demanding items she needed while she kept up her charade. when asked to comment on why she faked her own kidnapping through twitter, miss goldblum commented, “you people will never understand!! you’ll never understand what it’s like to be me!!”