#chipotleblogs

originally i wanted to take a bunch of brand URLs so brands would have a harder time moving here, but that spiraled into a desire to destroy the reputation of brands on tumblr and have some fun with it, i ended up studying the way the chipotle twitter posts and the time at which they post to try to emulate their style while getting across the general vibe of “i have no idea how to use tumblr and i want to be hip with the kids”

i actually had a bit i wanted to do where i would slowly reveal that the person posting was contractually bound to make the shitty memes by higher ups but i wanted that to be a very slow burn, i even had a fake name for her (samantha hawthorn, born june 11th 1989)

after a bit though i wanted to have a main blog so i could follow people and like posts (@chipotlemexicangrill) but that got terminated by tumblr with no explanation this morning (i assume for either impersonating a brand poorly or spamming which is fair), i wanted to end it like senior dogs sanctuary and post something incredibly raunchy at the end and then never post anything else but oh well k guess

i got a ton of death threats but being a trans girl online i’m used to that and it doesn’t really bother me, that being said you can kung pow penis brands and that’s fantastic but you shouldn’t tell whatever poor PR manager to kill themselves, that’s just uncool

sorry @panerabred for dissing your delicious broccoli cheddar soup i did it for the bit

honestly the funniest thing to come out of this wasn’t the blog getting terminated by tumblr, it was the brand tracking blog getting tricked by it, that tells me i did a decently good job!

anyway tl;dr this was a fake blog GO HOME

Tumblr has a feature called “Side Blogs”, and when setting up this account, we accidentally connected it to a parent account. Unfortunately, this means we’ve been unable to like or follow any blogs. Our bad.