#childhoodreader

WRESTLE IT OUT ³

? slowburn!hollis x childhoodfriend!reader

? based on song WRESTLE IT OUT by TOMMY FLEECE

? hollis was always just your best friend, till he wasn't

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you stared at your phone. hollis never showed you this song. you were already parked in nate's neighborhood to go into the party, and liz was already getting out of the car.

"bro are you good?" you turn to see liz staring at you through the passenger window.

you only turn your car back and connect to aux, liz was too eager and left you by yourself in your car.

you turn the audio all the way up in your small subaru and start playing the track. the smooth drums and the bass makes the car shake. then hollis' voice fills the car.

touch my skin

you nod along to the beat. but slowly you really start to listen to the song.

cross my fingers when i'm with you

hollis always posed in pictures you guys took together with crossed fingers. or when he drove you and poked your cheek with crossed fingers. or when he always drew crossed fingers in the letters he gave you.

maybe you weren't crazy, it was all in front of you this entire time.

you couldn't be with him, he was your brother's best friend. it was morally wrong, you always thought he saw you like a sister.

the more you listened the more it made you sick.

you're in the bleachers, i'm in my room

can i take your hands and tie them up again?

can you take my face and forget everything?

you didn't know what he meant by everything he said, and that only made you even more nervous. you sit in your car still, with no noise staring into nothing. you felt so many emotions and didn't know if you could even face him.

two honks woke you up from the trance you were in, you see roman's car behind you.

"i heard you saw his post." roman is leaning over in front of your car window, intensively looking around.

"yea. i, uh, don't understand the song." roman only shook his head and opened your car door. he crouched down to be eye level with you.

"come on, y/n, you know exactly what he meant. you don't have to lie to me or yourself on how you feel. but we all know what he means. i love you and i'm not going to force you to talk to me, but i'm always here."

you nod and get your stuff ready to get out of the car. roman drags you out and starts chatting your ear off about some girl he had been talking to for the last month. you smiled and admired your older brother, feeling safe. walking towards the house, roman squeezes your arm for encouragement.

roman opens the door and leads you into the loud environment. everywhere you looked people were packed, talking to each other with love. roman smiles at you and runs off to talk to some girl in the crowd.

you search around to find liz, and you see her talking to finn. you made eye contact with her and nodded, leaving her to it. walking through the house, the smell of alcohol intoxicated your nose.

you walk into the kitchen to see hollis talking to some girl, she had dark beautiful hair and was shorter than you. you felt that familiar pain of jealousy in your chest. you make sure he can't see you as you walk through, you were too tired for any confrontation today.

the kitchen had back doors leading to the patio outside, where you would meet nate and ella. smiling, you run to ella and hug her tightly, and hug nate and take a seat next to them.

you guys were having an easy conversation, talking about their futures as you make them promise to keep in touch. the easy laughter made it easier for you be there.

it felt nice to finally ignore all of the thoughts that constantly circulated in your brain every second of the day. but that state of peace is shattered when you hear sister blasting inside the house.

you can only sit there in silence while nate and ella run inside, and you silently follow in because who the fuck else were you supposed to hang out with?

you see hollis at the front of the living room with the random girl by his side. he had a drink on high right hand, and his left hand on her waist.

the lyrics were spilling out, and you felt disgust all over again. he was showing off his new song that clearly had meaning between you two, while holding another girl's waist.

you stood quietly next to ella, and you could feel her stare at you. everyone who was close to you two knew the real meaning behind the song. you kept shaking your head in disbelief. there's no fucking way hollis was doing this right in front of your face.

but then he looked up at you. all confidence and arrogance cracked for just a second, and he saw how disappointed you looked. god, he felt so dumb. the girl behind all of the songs he wrote was right in front of him.

you both held eye contact for more than 5 seconds, and that only pissed you off more. you finally found the courage to leave after the song finished, you heard everyone chanting for hollis as you walked outside.

you sat on the porch, searching your mind for answers. you hated yourself for reading too much into everything. the possibility that sister was about you was pretty likely, but still, there is a chance that it isn't.

but you wanted to hate hollis, but you know you couldn't.

"hi princess," hollis sits next to you, resting his head on your shoulder. "don't hate me, okay?"

you can't say anything without crying, so you put your head on top of his. you feel hollis grab your hand and hold it on his thigh, his thumb drawing patterns on the back of your hand.

disappointment floods over you, but all you can do is stay there with him, because god you loved him more than anything else.

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