#chickooonisms

i still think that the “are we to be two immortals locked in an epic battle until judgement day and trumpet sound?” is like the quintessential sparbossa line and i can’t stop thinking about it since my latest rewatch. this has been said before but it bears repeating because holy shit it would have been less gay if they fucked on screen. “ohh do you hate me?? do you want to fight me? fight me FOREVER?? fight me forever? forever and ever and ever? for all eternity??” i can’t with them

the people love my chickens i’m gonna start chickening everything. i’ll chicken those pirates. barbossa is a crévecoeur. elizabeth is a brahma. jack is that piece of shit rooster who pisses everyone off so bad that he’s one wrong move away from becoming dinner. davy jones might actually be a turkey

careless whisper is so sparbossa mutiny to me . unsubstantial post but like do you guys see the vision

i know the general consensus around sparbossaheads is that they fuck but i’ve unfortunately brain poisoned myself into very vehemently seeing barbossa as some denomination of asexual or at least averse to intercourse in its traditional sense?. even now that im NOT 14 and afraid of sex and projecting a misguided identity onto him anymore … like he hands jack a blunt object and asks to be hit really hard and that’s the sex to him. idk

hector barbossa is kind of like the flea-ridden soggy old cat you adopt out of a cardboard box on the sidewalk and jack sparrow is kind of like the dog you see the car ahead of you abandon on the side of the freeway