#chartana

"Then I saw her face Now I'm a believer Not a trace of doubt in my mind

I'm in love."

"The Monkees" had said it first. Then "Smashmouth" had smeared it all over Shrek, like some sort of subliminal message with the power to slither and slink through the complex nooks and crannies of human brains. A kabillion rom-coms were released every year that contained the same messages. Books, comics, ads, TV shows, webshows, radio broadcasts... Everybody knew about it. It was one of the biggest cliches one could find. More mainstream than 9Gag. Practically every person in the planet believed that it was a true notion. It was just there. Fluttering above people's heads, like an angry and swollen cloud that could explode at any moment. Leaving poor humans waiting, expecting, relying on the odds and hoping that the outcome wouldn't be too disastrous if they got caught in the downpour.

Love at first sight. Right.

Charlie was a scientist. Her beliefs were usually based on visible and explainable facts. She never settled for things like "It is because it is." "It just happens." "That's what somebody said it should be." "CNN said so." "Don't ask." Ever since she could talk, she asked questions. Heck, rumor had it that her first word had been "Why?", and her family could hear her incessant little voice uttering that word over and over while they slept, or while she slept. She needed answers. She needed to understand why things happened and how. She urgently needed to understand the world that surrounded her so she could gain tactics and weapons to make it through, alive. At least through high school. 

And she had always gotten her answers. 

All her answerable questions had been answered. And the ones that hadn't been answered were the ones that had results that were still being dug out, untangled, or simply impossible. God and religion had too many gaps in them that frustrated and conflicted her to no end, so she had given up on them. The main question being that one regarding the reason why bad things happened to good people. And it went far beyond Judy's cryptic answer that said something like Mister God wouldn't give you anything that you couldn't take.

But that was a story for another day.

It was simple. If you could explain it to Charlie, then it was real.

And then, there was love.

Romantic literature was never her forte. It seemed more fantastic than Heracles' twelve labors. Charlie narrowed it to some sort of chemistry and pheromones and environmental factors that produced the reaction that led to "attraction". Just like it happened with friends. You clicked with some people. And others just saw you as a nice chew toy and slushie target.

And then there was her. 

Santana Lopez. The Santana Lopez.

 Charlie had known her for a while, since she was best friends with Quinn. And she had always known that she was pretty. But just that.

And also that Santana's smile made her smile.

And her laugh made butterflies bubble in her tummy.

And that the one time that she had played beauty parlor with them and had gotten to brush her silky black and spend some time with her had been one of the greatest days of her life.

Until the day in "Staples" came. And then the picnic under the bleachers. And the day when they went out for churros. 

Everything changed. Now there were smiles in the hallways and endlessly slamming into lockers and other furniture. But this time, it wasn't the bullies. It was Charlie herself. Every single time that she laid eyes on the gorgeous Latina, she couldn't stop staring until she disappeared or until something forced her to shift her attention.

The bubbles in her stomach were now pterodactyls. She never understood what a crush was. Or rather, she did, but she had never ever felt one. She thought she never would. And -surprise!- she did. But she was crushing on a girl. Quinn's best friend. One of the most popular girls in McKinley. She was 34653764 levels above Charlie in the social hierarchy. But now apparently, Charlie had her attention as well, since no signs of rejection were coming from the Latina's side. 

But still.

Santana was a girl. 

Charlie had been condemned to hell more than once. Indirectly, through the priest's sermons. And directly, through her dad's words and wrecking hands. Her sleep was tainted with angry hands and jagged words. When she made mistakes, she felt faint thinking about the consequences that would come from her parents' judging. Maybe they thought she couldn't fall further down.

But they were wrong.

Charlie was crushing on a girl. No, correction. Charlie was in love with a girl.

There seemed to be no sort of redemption from that. If her parents were ever to find out, not even turning into a nun would save her. The mere thought of it was enough to keep her awake, tossing and turning in her bed for hours. Anxiety emanated in thick waves through her whole body during mass. The ugly statues and paintings seemed to be staring down at her with disdain. She even thought that a lighting would strike her once she crossed the church's threshold after coming to the realization that she was in love with Santana Lopez.

But there would be time to deal with that, since Hell's doors seemed to be locked for the time being. 

In the meantime, she had to deal with something that seemed to be far much worse.

Feelings.

Okay, she knew she was in love. What in the Jurassic Park was she supposed to do next? 

She wished she could take Santana for churros every day. She wished she could sit next to her during every class. She wanted more than anything to be the reason why Santana smiled or laughed. Maybe not the only one, that was cruel. But a more permanent reason. 

But for now, at least they were friends.

Friends with giggly smiles and nervous eyes and flinching touches that led to stuttering apologies...

Friends that stood up for each other and that seemed like every action had a hundred thousand hidden meanings underneath a simple surface.

Only time would tell.

"I'm a believer,